soft skills essential for personal growth

1

“Soft Skills essential for Personal Growth”

BY THUSHI SUMUDUSRI LANKA

24 September 2010

CONTENTSWhat do you mean by an Image?What is important to build an Image?What is Etiquette?Why Etiquette is so important?What are the advantages of practicing

etiquette?Business Etiquette Dress EtiquetteDinning EtiquetteHandling telephone effectivelyTime Management tipsThe importance of correct Attitude,

Discipline, Commitment & Loyalty for personal & organizational success24 September 2010 2

What do you mean by an Image?

“An image is a mental impression of a person (or an organization), inside ones’ own mind or those of other people, which characterizes good breeding or behaviour that champions good qualities.”

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What is an Image?

Who you are-What you do-How you project yourself  Professional imageThe lookThe styleBecome known for the higher

level of service you provide Your excellent value system

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Conduct your self at the Work Place

The way you talk & behave at the office tell a lot about who you are

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ETIQUETTE PROFESSIONALISM

COMMUNICATION

ATTITUDE

CHARACTER

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What is important to build an Image?

Conduct one’s self at the workplace (Business Etiquette)

Dress to be smart and professional

Conduct one’s self at a dining function

Meet people with quality and professionalism

Know to handle the telephone effectively

Demonstrate perfect character qualities

Show a positive attitude all the time

Good Time Management

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What is Etiquette?

Etiquette is defined as “the forms, manners & ceremonies established by convention as acceptable or required in social relations, in a profession, or in official life”

In other way, these are practices and forms prescribed by social convention.

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Good Manners (Good Etiquettes)

Good office manners may not be listed in your job description, but they certainly play a crucial part in your career

The ability to handle yourself properly today, outweighs even your technical skills if you know what to do, when to do it, and how to do it with grace and style, you’ll have a competitive edge in your career

All business experts agree that good manners promote good business.

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Discussion Point

Identify the wrong things (bad etiquette) we do in a typical organization?

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Why is etiquette so important?• Because people judge you and your company by

what they see and by what they believe to be true.

If they perceive that you’re even slightly Uncultured or unrefined, your business may suffer.

If people perceive you to be knowledgeable,

professional and well mannered, they’ll want to do business with you.

As a second chance may not be possible or practical, if you do not have basic knowledge and practice of etiquette.

By learning etiquettes in the business world and local culture, certain situations which could create a bad impressions of you can be avoided and you could win others admiration.

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WHAT ARE THE ADVANTAGES OF PRACTIZING ETIQUETTES

People will respect you.Can reduce conflicts among

people. It gives guidelines how to

behave at work place, society etc,.

It is very easy to solve problems.

It will tell you as how to dress smart, communicate effectively, dining manners.

It will tell you as to how to make a good “first impression”.

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BASIC GUIDELINES FOR ETIQUETTES

Be courteous and thoughtful to the people around you

Always try to consider other people’s feelings

Apologize when you do a mistake or wrong thing

Avoid raising your voiceBe mindful of your language

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Why Business Etiquette?

Day by day, the world is changing and new technologies, businesses, industries and new beliefs are gearing up. In this situation, we as individuals also should change to face these challenges. At business level, you need to meet people or to participate in events, functions or social gatherings. Hence, you should be able to present yourself or behave yourself with good mannerism, kindness and courtesy at any occasions. This will make a difference in personal success and corporate profitability.

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Why Business Etiquette?....Business etiquette is an important

factor that put you at ease when you are in business and social situations.

Etiquette is about presenting yourself with the kind of polish that shows you can be taken seriously. Etiquette is also about being comfortable around people (and making them comfortable around you!) too.

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Business Etiquette

Business Etiquette then, is the way professional Businesspeople-

regardless of job title or type of business conduct themselves around

others.

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Introductions (of People)

The “less important” person is introduced to the “more important” person

Rank: social and professional standingSex: woman before manAge: older person commands more

respectMan should always stand up when

introducedWoman: under 18 should always

stand up when introduced

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Meeting People with quality & professionalism (the correct handshake)

How you shake hands, introduce your self, how you use your business cards & how you

conduct your self when you meet quality professionals is very important

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Some of the situations in which you should shake hands:

When meeting a person for the first time or when saying good-bye.

When renewing your friendships.When greeting or being

introduced to someone. When ending a transaction or

leaving a business meeting or social function.

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The proper Hand shake

When you are introduced to someone, you should always stand and shake hands.

When you hand shake look into the eye. Shake hands firmly but not aggressively. It can be last about 3 seconds.Release hands after the shake, even if

the introduction continues. A handshake should be firm but not

bone crushing.  Shake hands a couple of times from the

elbow not from the shoulderHold your drink in left hand to avoid a

cold, wet handshake.

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Exchange of business cardsHand shake firstOffer the card at the next first

opportunityCard faced upwardsMay use both handsIf placed on the table,

acknowledge with a “thank you”Carry enough cards with you

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Business cards

Do not use Mr. or Mrs. Use only professional titleKeep in an easy access placeOffer your own card firstBe selective, do not offer too earlyIf a card is offered, reciprocate

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Activity

Practical demonstrations on good etiquette practices in Business Environment

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Dress to suit your profession

Professional dressing is all about dressing to suit your profession. A dress that is suited for

one profession may not necessarily suit another profession

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MAKING A GOOD “FIRST IMPRESSION”

The way you dress is the single and biggest non-verbal communication you make about yourself.

Your dress conveys success, trustworthiness, intelligence and suitability.

Avoid dark colours and printed fabrics.

Make sure your clothes are nicely pressed.

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 You should be able to choose your

dress according to the event, function, or occasion and office as well. People can judge you the way you dress. Some points are given below:

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MAKING A GOOD “FIRST IMPRESSION”

Clothing check list :

Is it appropriateDoes it fit?Whilst wearing the outfit can I

work comfortably?Does the color and design suit

me?What message does it send?

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Wardrobe Units - Gentlemen

Whatever The Occasion: Dress Smartly

•Formal Wear – Official Functions/ Weddings•Career Wear – Specific Uniform •Business Wear – Corporate Image•Evening Wear – Parties & Cocktails•Travel Wear – Comfort With Style•Casual Wear – Smart And Elegant•Sports Wear – Appropriate Representation

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Formal Dressing

Formal Dress Code

Suits •Dark Black Or Navy•Dark Grey•Dark Brown or Shades of Brown•White / Off White

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GentlemenShirt – Although lighter shades & solid

colours are worn for work there is no hard & fast rule. The collar should fit (two finger test) & if long sleeves are worn should cover the wrist.

Ties should be, matched with the suit and

shirt. Do not wear particularly funny ones featuring Micky Mouse, Donald duck, Tweety etc.

Shades of the tie could compliment or contrast the shirt24 September 2010 30

Gentlemen

The length of the tie should not exceed the middle of the belt & be no shorter than the top of the belt

The tie pin should be below 4’’ below the tie knot

 Socks – Colour should ideally match the tie

or be combined with the shirt & pants

Pants- The trouser leg should break at the front of the shoes & taper down at the bottom

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GentlemenShoes – The colour should not be lighter

than that of the trouser

Belt and shoes should match

Make sure to have your shoes polished and shined. Never wear dirty or scuffed shoes.

Avoid using unnecessary accessories

Make sure your hair is not too long for the company. You might be told otherwise.

April 12, 2023 32

Office Wear

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LadiesWear a suit with longstanding colours of

Black, Gray, Brown, Navy Blue or blue etc.,. Choose colours to suite your complexion & the occasion

To be a professional, wear an appropriate length skirt, Sarees, Skirt and Blouses, and avoid tight skirts, frocks and mini-skirts. Quality of your suit, gives more strength and impression.

 Avoid sleeveless blouses as business attire.

Your blouse should fit comfortably, and not appear to be tight, wrinkled or distracting.

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LadiesAvoid dangling earrings and necklaces.

Keep jewelry simple.

Fragrances – Should be subtle & should be used sparingly

Accessories/Jewellery – Should be simple. To a good watch, necklace, ear rings, & a ring per hand. Nothing noisy, flashy or distracting

A purse or bag that will accommodate necessities only, but not bulky.

Always try to wear comfortable shoes. Heals over 1 ½ “ are not recommended for office.

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LadiesDark leather handbag is a perfect choice.

Avoid sparkles, jewels, spangles on handbags.

Shoes-Handbag-belt should be at the same colour

Make Up- Should blend, suit the wearer & suit the occasion

Nails- Nail varnish- No chipped nail varnish or cover up jobs. Toe & fingernail varnish should match. Avoid very dark shades – Purple blue, maroon etc, as this can draw attention to your hands. A natural look is best.

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Activity

Practical demonstrations on good Dress Sense in a typical Business Environment

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Conduct your self at Dinning functions

The way you eat, drink & behave at official dinning functions tell a lot

about who you are

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CONDUCT YOURSELF AT DINNING FUNCTIONS

There is need of good table manners. Knowing how to act at a dinner table is going to make your job a lot easier and more enjoyable.

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Different social occasions

Cocktail partyHigh teaBreakfast BrunchBuffet meals Sit down meals

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Cocktail party

Usually around 7 or 7.30pmWill be for 2 hoursDrinks and cocktail food will be

servedMix aroundDo not drink or eat over the limitLeave within 2 hours

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High tea

Evening- tea time 3 pm to 6 pmShort eats, cakes servedForks or spoons providedTea, coffee or soft drinks served

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Breakfast / Brunch

BreakfastDuring breakfast timeShort meetings – usually 45

minutesShould be fully attired – “on the

way to work”BrunchTime between breakfast & lunchA combination of breakfast and

lunch food will be servedUsually a buffet Atmosphere may be more relaxed

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Buffet meals

All main meals could be served in the buffet style

Do not over fill the plateGo for as many serves as

necessaryDo not over eat or waste

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Sit-down Meals

Sit down meals – lunch or dinner formal western setting. Up to 6 courses may be served

Typical western meal lunch or dinner generally a 3 course meal

Meals are served individually Each person can have his own

choice of foodTea and coffee may be served after

the meal 24 September 201047

Sit-down Meals

Food is served in individual portionsSide plate will be always on the leftAll glasses will be kept on the rightNapkins will be on the plate or the side plate

Cutlery & crockery •All spoons & knives are on the right side of the plate. •All forks are on the left side of the plate. •Desert spoon & fork will be in front of the plate

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Cutlery & crockery

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Formal Western Dining Setting

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Glasses

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Bread & butter

•Keep bread on the side plate•Use butter knife or meat knife•Never cut bread – break with fingers•Break to sizes you want to eat•Butter only one portion at a time

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Three course meal

1st course – Appetizer , soup, shell fish, salad or fruit

2nd course – Chicken, pork, steak, fish or rice /noodles / spaghetti

3rd course – Fruits, ice cream or puddingFollowed by tea or coffee

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Using cutlery

1st course - appetizer

•Use the fork provided•If oysters or shrimp cocktail are ordered – the “oyster fork” will be on the right

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Soup

Soup – the right way Hold the spoon in the right handDip the spoon sidewaysDrink from the side of the spoonTilt the bowl away from you

Soup – the wrong way Do not lower the mouth to the bowl but lift the arm to the mouthDo not make a noise when drinking

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2nd course -main meal

ChickenSteakPorkFishRice/NoodlesIndividual servings

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Holding a fork & knife

While eatingWhen talking or resting in between

meals - keep the fork and knife turned inwards

Finished positionWhen the eating is complete keep

the fork & knife together , tongs facing

upwards 

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While eating…GravyYou may break small pieces of bread

or roti with fingers and dip in gravy.Do not try to scoop up gravy with

fork or knife and lickFishFillet the fish a little at a timeHold fish knife like a pencilUse fingers to take bones from

mouth and keep on the side of the plate

Do not spit it out directly to the plate

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Spaghetti

Fork to be held on the right, spoon on the left.

Use the fork to swirl the spaghettiSwirl on the spoon, not the on the

plate.Eat with the fork

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3rd course -dessert

FruitsIce creamPudding/cakeFollowed by tea or coffeeDesert spoon & fork will be in front

of the plateUse one or bothUnused items can remain on the

table Tea or coffee may be served. You

may refuse the same24 September 2010 60

CONDUCT YOURSELF AT DINNING FUNCTIONSDo not take too much food into your

mouth. Do not talk when your mouth is full. Do not pile too much food on your

plate.Do not ask for a “doggy bag”. Should sit up straight, but not stiffly. Do not leave the spoon in your

coffee cup or soup bowl. Gentlemen should make sure of all

Ladies are seated before they sit. When you’re not eating, keep your

hands in your lap.

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CONDUCT YOURSELF AT DINNING FUNCTIONSElbows may rest gently on the edge of

the table between courses, but not while you’re eating.

Never chew with your mouth open or make loud noises when you eat.

When cutting food (meat, salad, etc.), cut enough for two or three mouthfuls and eat those before cutting more. Don’t cut your whole steak at once.

Place the used teabag beside your cup on your saucer.

Ladies should not leave a lipstick mark on their glass.

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Activity

Practical demonstrations on Dining Etiquette in a typical hotel setting (lunch)

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Your verbal & written communications

Your verbal & written communication abilities speaks a lot. Those have to be professional.

Verbal : Speeches, Group Discussions, Face-to-face, TP communications

Written : Memo’s, Letters, E-mails, Faxes, Notices

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Handling the telephone effectively

The caller can not see you, so you can’t impress by the way you dress or how big

your office is. But your voice and your tone creates a mental picture or an image of your company and its business culture And most

of all, about you !

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Basics in Answering your Phone

Keep a the pen and a paper at the beginning of the day

Sit up straight Answer before the third ring Greet and identify yourself Be courteous, friendly and enthusiastic

yet professional Listen with empathy Summarize if needed End the call positively

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Basics in Making a Call

Plan your call Greet the person and identify yourself

Be courteous and clear when you speak

Be brief and stick to the point Always call back as quick and as you promised (maximum within 48 Hrs)

Hang up gently24 September 201067

Time Management

Time is probably the scarcest resource of all. Time is precious to us. Time cannot

be saved it can only be managed well so that we achieve all we want to achieve

by effectively managing our time

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Above all-be organized and manage your time

Being organized and being able to manage your time will improve the productivity by miles.

Try to do 4 D,s in Time Management

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Time Management

Important

Top 1- Do it 2- Delay

it 3-

Delegate itNot 4- Dump

it

Not Top Urgent

1 2

4 3

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Set Daily Goals - Do it

Managers are always planning. Most successful managers operate with a daily checklist.

Keep a list of prioritized “to do” tasksUse a star or other symbol to

designate projects with the highest priority

Enjoy the process of drawing a line through goals as they are reachedIt will make you feel much better on your way home each day. 24 September 2010 71

DelegateDelegating is good for everybody. Delegating-assigning tasks to

others-has two enormous benefits. It reduces your own task load, and it helps employees make their best contribution to the productivity of your team.

Proper delegation keeps employees motivated, increases productivity and frees the supervisor to do his or her own work.

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Importance of correct ADCL

The importance of correct Attitude,

Discipline Commitment & Loyalty, for Personal

and Organizational Success

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Attitude of the Employee

An attitude is representing an individual's degree of like or dislike for an item. Attitudes are generally positive or negative views of a person, place, thing, or event.

A positive attitude boosts productivity. Your attitude sets the pace & the tone in your team.

*Attitudes are caught, not taught.

* Your attitude speaks so loudly, employees can’t hear what you say.

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Positive AttitudesWHAT ARE THE POSITIVE

BEHAVIOURSpread a SMILE aroundApply “Positive” on “Negatives”Focus on the good things of each

daySay “Please” and “Thank You”Practice EMPATHYEvaluate your behaviour Cultivate your sense of humor 24 September 2010 75

Discipline

Working with accepted norms, behaviors, rules of the company.

Personal Discipline including Grooming/Hygiene

Manage your time Effectively & Efficiently

Planning/Organizing/Leading/Controlling

Discipline should not be violated at any cost

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Commitment in Work

Should be very thorough with your job

Remember, your customer is paying your salary

Stick to the appointmentsWork as a teamAlways work with a “helping

mind”.Try to learn from others

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Loyalty

You and your family

For the country

Your working place

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You and Your family

Look after yourself & your family

- Good food at correct time - Good Sleep/rest - Good exercise - Good leisure/free time - Try to be as stress free as much as possible

Loyalty

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Loyal to your work place

-You are living because of your workplace - Be honest/trustworthy - Have a cheerful workplace - Work with a “smile” - Use company resources sparingly

Loyalty

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Loyal to your country

- You have a duty to perform to

the country - Be Sri Lankan buy Sri

Lankan

Loyalty

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Thank You

Mobile : 072-2843468Email: dilshardbnp@gmail.com

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