ten tunes to play life social etiquette public seminar

Ten Tunes to Play Life

Social Etiquette Public Seminar

Define Life……..

One Tool to Play Life Right..

Define Trial….

• Trying to take something away from somebody else

• Reflected in competition• Where results are often sharply

focused• Where freedom may be lost• Where money may be taken away• When the world starts coming after

you

Destroying Attitude Patterns

• DenialFail or resist to see WHAT IS

• Making initial assumptionFail to test for truth or accuracy

• InertiaParalysis caused by fear

• Deceptive maskingWear a mask & forgetting your real needs

Right or Happy

No good time, no better time

It is Right Now

Life Ten Tunes to Play It Right

1. You either get it, or you do not2. You Create your own experience3. People do what works4. You cannot change what you do not

acknowledge5. Life rewards action6. There is no reality only perception7. Life is managed, it is not cured8. We teach people how to treat us9. There is power in forgiveness10.You have to name it before you can claim it

Tune One: You either get it, or you do not

Strategy Become one of those who gets

it

Break the code of human nature

find out what makes people tick

Learn why you and other people do what they do, and do

not do what they do not.

What is “IT”…..

• Code of life• Is it relationship?• Is it self-management?• Is it career competition?• Is it emotional life?

To Get “IT”

• Be prepared with necessary information

• Be prepared with required skills• Pay attention • Make adjustment• Do not miss the time• Will to learn to make better choices

To Get “IT” recognize the EDGE

• Existing1. Instinctual2. Involuntary3. Reactive self preservation4. Primary goal from one day to another

• Living 1. Exercise of certain learned skills2. Attitude 3. Abilities

To Get “IT” Keep a Primary Goal

• Have a quality of experience• Keep unique and rewarding

experience• Skills needed are “Understanding” &

“Controlling”• Make it “Happen” the way you “Want”• Learn “Why” & “How” you do what

you do• Do not “Do” what they do not “Do”

“knowledge” if you want to Get “IT”

• Knowledge gives you an incredible edge• Knowledge makes you the one to control• Knowledge makes you “The One” every

ones “Follow”• Knowledge makes you enjoy special

peace of mind• Knowledge makes you confident• Knowledge makes you know the buttons• Knowledge makes you predict• Knowledge is POWER

Hardest Part of Knowledge

• In learning something new, is unlearning the old way of doing it…….

• You must be careful and discriminate about where and from whom you accept input…..

• Know the fact, but do Know the Ropes……

• Get the Map, Plan and Time Table if you want to Know….

Your Life Strategy & Involving People

• Overcome their resistances & excuses• Get them to accept your view of the

world

HOW?• Let them find similarities between you

and your values and their own• Find similar things, both of you can

deal in with

Tune Two: You create your own experience

Strategy Acknowledge and accept accountability for your

life

Understand your role in creating the results that are your life

Learn how to choose better so you have best

You are Accountable….

• If you are successful or unsuccessful

• If your relationships are on the rocks

• If you are happy or sad• If life is fair or unfair

You cannot find a link

between your problem

and yourself

Mistreat and

things won’t get better

Misdiagnose every problem

If you do not accept

accountability

To be Accountable…Ask Yourself

• What is the life circumstance that I do not like?

• What did I do to arrange the situation so that it happened in the way that it happened?

• What did I do to make the result possible?• Did I trust foolishly?• Did I miss important warning signs?• Did I fail to be clear about what I wanted?• Did I choose the wrong person?• Did I choose the wrong place?• Did I have the wrong reason?• Did I fail to take needed action?• Did I fail to require enough of myself?• Did I need to start certain new behaviors?

You are a Victim………

You are not a Victim………..

I Own the Problem……..

The Problem is in ME

I am a Victim…..Because

What happened to me as a child

Difference Between Child & Adult

Child• Does not have the

knowledge• Does not have the

power to choose• Reacts• Powerless• Cannot choose

the source

Adult• Has the

knowledge• Has the power to

choose • Acts• Powerful• Can choose the

source

How to Create your own Experience?

When you Play, you Pay……

When you Choose?

• When you choose the behavior, you choose the consequences

• When you choose the thoughts, you choose the consequences

• When you choose the thoughts, you choose the physiology

Choose

Behavior Results Experience

Self Physiological Programming

Mental Programming•Low/High-self esteem•Low/High-self confident

Behavioral Programming•Anger-Peaceful

•Bitterness-Sweetness

Real World Choices…You Choose….

• Where to be• How to act• What to say• What to do• Whom to be with • What to concentrate on• What to believe• When to go along• When to resist• Whom to trust• Whom to avoid

Tune Three: People do what works

Strategy Identify the payoffs that drive

your behavior and that of others

Control the payoffs to control life

Tune Four: You cannot change what you do not

acknowledge

Strategy Get real with yourself about

life and everybody in it

Be truthful about what is not working in your life

Stop making excuses and start making results

Tune Five: Life rewards action

Strategy Make careful decisions and then pull the

trigger

Learn that the world could not care less about thoughts without actions

Tune Six: There is no reality; only perception

StrategyIdentify the filters through which you view the world

Acknowledge your history without being controlled by it

Tune Seven: Life is managed, it is not cured

Strategy Learn to take charge of your life and hold

onThis is a long ride

You are the driver every single day

Tune Eight: We teach people how to treat us

StrategyOwn, rather than complain about, how people treat you

Learn to renegotiate your relationships to have what you

want

Tune Nine: There is power in Forgiveness

Strategy Open your eyes to what anger and resentment are doing to

you

Take your power back from those who have hurt you

Tune Ten: You have to name it before you can

claim itStrategy

Get clear about what you want and take your turn

Thank You