community links issue 122

J a n u a r y 2 - J a n u a r y 1 6 V o l . 5 I s s u e 1 2 2 y”xa, hjhu - adhu ,arp

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FeaturesJanuary 19, 2009

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20 No Time To weepSo, if we are convinced that we have done our

absolute best for the other person and have stillfailed to bring about a satisfactory resolution, theonly thing we can do is shed a tear.Rabbi Yossi Goldman

Words Like ArrowsThe allegory is understandable. Prayer sure-

ly surpasses the pen in its might over thesword. And some prayers, like a sword, arestrong and sweeping and affect all those theystrike. Others, like an arrow, reach one specif-ic point from a far distance

Parshas VayeichiRabbi Mordechai Kaminetzky

AngerAn angry person makes the people around him

miserable, particularly his/her own family. Peoplelose respect for an angry person even if he is aTorah scholar and does Mitzvos; people will notrespect him and do not learn from him.Rabbi Chaim Zev Citron

community links • Volume 5 Issue 122

For Crying Out LoudThere was so much excitement that an actu-

al news crew came to film the wedding. Thefootage would be incorporated as part of thepre-feature newsreels shown at Americanmovie theatres across the Atlantic! Parshas VayigashRabbi Mordechai Kaminetzky


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Is It Okay to Hate?By Robert J. Rome, Ph.D.


As a psychologist, I know that hatred often wastes energy. Yet, hate seems very appropriate some-times. Whenever I hear the name of Hitler, I immediately respond with the Hebrew, “YimachShmo,” “May his name be wiped out.” I feel similar sentiments for Yasser Arafat (Yimach Shmo).

Ahmadinajab (Yimach Shmo). Haman HaRasha (Yimach Shmo). And there have been others throughout his-tory who have sought to destroy the Jewish community or Israel. May all their memories be wiped out.

There appears to be one more person who should be added to this list, if the accusations against him are provedin court. Bernard Madoff may belong on this list of infamy, if the stories are true.

According to news accounts, Yeshiva University lost over $110 million through investments with Madoff.Hadassah lost tens of millions which will hurt the famed Hadassah Hospital in Jerusalem. A number of philan-thropies dedicated to serving the Jewish community and needy both here in the U.S. and in Israel have folded upshop as a result of losses through investments with Madoff. Thousands in Israel will go hungry with the demiseof the charities that supported them. Madoff literally took the food off the tables of the hungry, at least that‘swhat the newspapers tell us..

Unlike Hitler or Ahmadinajab Bernard Madoff appeared to harm the Jewish community from within. He gothimself elected to various Boards of Directors. He even served as the Treasurer of Yeshiva University, the sameinstitution which allegedly lost so much money through investing with Madoff.

According to investor accounts as to what happened, organizations and other potential investors actually com-peted to get “accepted” by Madoff. This was the greatest (pardon the expression) “good old boy network” everseen in the Jewish community.

Bernie Madoff reportedly was only too willing to welcome to his investment fund those who clamored to beincluded. I don’t know what’s worse: Madoff reportedly working so hard to gain the trust of the community toonly then destroy so many’s dreams and futures, or Madoff appearing to allow all funds to disappear without oneword of warning to those who trusted him.

But this article is ultimately not about Madoff. It is about the culture that perpetuates the Madoffs of the world.

There is an entire culture that has developed over recent decades where the Jewish community seems more con-cerned with the promotion of the community’s “beautiful people” than with the promotion of serving the needsof the people. Entire publications are mailed by Jewish charitable agencies throughout the year with no otherpurpose than to show pictures of the Jewish “nobility” of Los Angeles at special events. The articles in thesecolorful magazines do not even describe the causes promoted through the events. The causes are insignificantin this new culture. Only the pictures of the “high and mighty” who attend are important.

The seeming effort is to attract new donors to the Jewish community by striving to get more individuals and cou-ples to want to be on the community A-list. Tikun Olam or perfecting the world does not matter. An event forCedars-Sinai is pictured in the exact same way as an event for American Jewish University. In fact, for the mostpart, the people in the pictures seem the same. You can’t tell the people or the events apart. Self-promotionappears a much higher goal of these active individuals than the backing of any cause.


I’m not naïve. I know that it is easier to raise $100,000 by getting 10 donors of $10,000 than to get 1000 donors of100 each. But $100 donors can be educated to give $200 and later $500 or $1000. There are no mailings from theFederation educating on how to give or regarding the causes to give to, only slick page after page of colored picturesof the select few.

It’s not just the self-promotional pictures or the seeming attempt to anoint a nobility of L.A. Unfortunately, budg-etary decisions are rooted in the “good old boy network” as well.

A number of years back, a few of those pictured in the glossy event pictures approached the Federation andCommunity Foundation to establish a new type of community high school for their teens. The Community gave amillion dollars to this effort. At about the same time, another group sought to establish a new school in a moreremote part of the Federation area. This group had the students and the teachers, but needed a boost in money tostart. This school formed by a group of average parents was told there was a Bureau of Jewish Education rule thata school must be established for three years before they can receive community money. One school gets a million,the other gets the cold shoulder. It’s not the merit of your program, but who you know.

It unfortunately was the desire to be included among the elite that seemed to drive Federation and CommunityFoundation leaders to investing with Madoff. The list of Madoff investors was the ultimate A-list. The organiza-tions that honor glossy photos of the rich and famous fell for the chance to say they made it to Madoff ’s list. Therewas no due diligence regarding the investing of community money. It was who they knew, not which investmentwould be best in the long run for the community. They were blindsided by the chance to be part Madoff ’s groupof those “who truly made it.”

Those who caused our community to lose tens of millions should seriously consider resigning their positions. Theyviolated community trust. And for what? For nothing better than a temporary feeling that they had made it on toMadoff ’s list. They never researched where the money was going. Would the money be safe? Madoff ’s list turnedout to be the ultimate list of true losers. These misguided “leaders” seemed to act for their own personal gain, thatthey had reached the pinnacle of acceptance, forgetting the good of the community. If not legally, certainly ethi-cally those empowered by the community needed to invest in less risky ways. It was not their money, but money putin their trust. They misused the public trust.

We need to change the entire culture. We need to eliminate the culture that promotes individuals rather than thecommunity at large. We need leaders who put the welfare of the community first.

I seem on the verge of hating all those who went against the interests of the larger community and contributed tothe community losing so much money through Madoff. It takes so much effort to raise millions. So much goodcould have come from that money lost in this scam. That money is lost now forever. But, I am hopeful that we canwork together to change this culture which brought us these losses. Sometimes, it takes some event so terrible thatattitudes and ways can be changed. It seems quite possible that good can come from this bad.

It is not too much to ask that those who lead our community act in ethical and moral ways. We have seen too manyJewish economic leaders end up in jail. It is clearly time that we see the emergence of a leadership in our Jewishcommunity that shares a more noble purpose, working for the good of the entire community. We need to see theend of the Jewish community’s “old boy’s network.” •

Robert J. Rome, Ph.D., is a licensed psychologist in clinical practice in Encino, California. He can be reached at [email protected].


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ANGER


There are good mid-dos (charactertraits), there are bad

middos, and there are really bad middos. One of theworst ones is anger.

The Rambam says that in general we should follow amoderate path of conduct. Not so with anger. Anger issuch a destructive characteristic that we should avoid itentirely even if sorely provoked.

Angry people get into fights. Anger leads to argumentsand hatred of others.

The Chazal had some strong things to say aboutanger. Here are some of them:

• Whoever gets angry is considered as if he worshipedidols.

• If a wise person gets angry, he loses his wisdom.• An angry person has a miserable life.• An angry person cannot teach properly.• Do not get angry and you will not sin.• Hashem loves a person who doesn’t get angry.• When a person gets angry, he tends to do things that

he would never do otherwise. So the consequences of angerreach quite far.

• An angry person makes the people around him mis-erable, particularly his/her own family. People lose respectfor an angry person even if he is a Torah scholar and doesMitzvos; people will not respect him and do not learnfrom him.

• We know how valuable it is to have a friend point outour mistakes so we can correct them. We need the inputof others. An angry person doesn’t receive that preciousinput because people are afraid to criticize him/her. Nordoes an angry person yield to truth when confronted by it.

Of course, it is difficult for an angry person to offer help-ful criticism to others because people only hear somethingif it’s said gently and lovingly. People tend to ignore crit-icism when it’s said in anger.

• Since an angry person is an unhappy person he/she isunable to deal properly with adversity and acceptHashem’s will. Of course, an angry person does not serveHashem as one should: with joy.How does a person stop him/herself from becoming

angry?

Just knowing how Chazal condemnS anger can help aperson control himself. Also, if one really does feelenraged, just don’t express it. Remain silent. If you musttalk, force yourself to speak quietly and politely. Do notraise your voice. You’ll probably find that the anger itselfsoon subsides.

Most important of all, as a religious Jew, you shouldbelieve that whatever happens to you is Hashem’s will.That doesn’t mean that a person who insults you orhurts you is justified in doing so. That person is wrongand is going against Torah and Hashem’s will. On theother hand, you, who are on the receiving end, weremeant to receive that particular pain. If you accept it asHashem’s will, you will not be angry at the person whowronged you.

By the way, how can the person who hurt you bewrong and yet the pain you suffered be right? Because ifHashem wants you, for whatever reason, to suffer somepain, He has many ways to bring it to you. He could havefound other ways to make it happen! The person whoexercised his free will to hurt you was absolutely wrongto do that. But since everything that happens isHashem’s will including the pain that you suffered, thenyou won’t be angry at that person because you were sup-posed to suffer that hurt.

Another way of controlling anger is realizing that theperson who is hurting you doesn’t understand you prop-erly and sees things very differently than you do. Again,this does not excuse that person’s conduct, but it doesmitigate it.

Train Yourself Not To Get AngryBy Rabbi Chaim Zev Citron


We should live our lives positively,filled with energy, enthusiasm, and joy.Being filled with anger truly diverts usfrom living life at its best. We owe it toHashem, we owe it to our friends, andwe owe it to ourselves not to let angerdiminish our lives.

“Banish anger from your heart; plucksorrow out of your flesh.” (Koheles6:1)

Here’s a story about not getting angry:

THE TEST OF THE TZADDIKREB MICHEL

The Tzaddik Reb Michel ofZlotchov and his wife were verypoor. They struggled to feedand clothe their children. Therewas one object that Reb Michelowned which was of greatvalue: a very special pair oftefillin he had inherited from hisfather. He could have sold thetefillin for a small fortune, but herefused to part with them.

One year there was no esrogto be found in the whole city.On Erev Succos a man arrivedwith an esrog. He was willing tosell it but only for an exorbitantprice.

Reb Michal sold his precioustefillin and bought the esrog.

When Reb Michal’s wife heardwhat he had done, she was furi-ous. “How many times did I begyou to sell the tefillin to providefood and necessities for thefamily, and now you sell it for anesrog?!” She got angrier andangrier as she shouted. Finallyshe gripped the esrog and bitoff the pittum (the top of theesrog), rendering the esrogpasul.

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The tefillin were gone. Now the esrog was gone. But Reb Michel said nothing. He did not getangry at his wife. He merely said, “Hashem, if you don’t want me to have an esrog, I accept yourwill.”

That night Reb Michal had a dream in which his father appeared to him. His father said, “Yourselling the tefillin for the mitzvah of the esrog was greatly appreciated in Heaven. But your not get-ting angry at your wife was appreciated much, much more. It was the greater mitzvah by far.” •

From Shoshanim, the Magazine for Jewish Teenage GirlsRabbi Chaim Zev Citron is a Rav and Maggid Shiur in Los Angeles and the associate editor of Shoshanim.


The wisest of men said there is a time to weep, which implies that there will be occasions when weeping is inap-propriate. Though King Solomon's exact words were there is a time to weep and a time to laugh, obviouslythere are times when other responses are called for. Clearly, life is not simply about crying or laughing.

This week's parshah relates the story of Joseph's dramatic reunion with his brothers. Though he embraces themall, he reserves his deepest emotions for his only full brother, Benjamin. Joseph was separated from his brotherswhen Benjamin was a mere child, and Benjamin was the only one who was not involved in the plot against Joseph.Theirs was, therefore, an exceptional embrace:

And he (Joseph) fell on his brother Benjamin's neck and cried, and Benjamin cried on his neck (Genesis 45:14).Rashi, quoting the Talmud, explains that for both brothers, their cries were, beyond the powerful feelings of the

moment, nothing short of prophetic. Joseph wept over the two Temples of Jerusalem, destined for destruction,which were in the land apportioned to the tribe of Benjamin. And Benjamin cried over the Sanctuary at Shilo, locat-ed in the land apportioned to the tribe of Joseph, which would also be destroyed.

The question is why: are they each crying over the other's churban (destruction)? Why do they not cry over theirown destructions?

The Lubavitcher Rebbe explains that when it comes to someone else's problem, we may be able to help but wecannot solve other people's problems. Even good friends can only do so much. We can offer generous assistance,support and the best advice in the world, but the rest is up to him or her. No matter how strenuous our efforts,there can be no guarantee that they will be successful. As hard as we may try to help, the individual alone holds thekey to sort out his or her own situation.

So, if we are convinced that we have done our absolute best for the other person and have still failed to bringabout a satisfactory resolution, the only thing we can do is shed a tear. We can pray for them, we can be sympathet-ic. Beyond that, there is really nothing else we can do. When we have tried and failed, all we can do is cry.

But when it comes to our own problems and challenges, our own churban, there we dare not settle for a goodcry. We cannot afford the luxury of giving up and weeping. If it is our problem, then it is our duty to confront itagain and again until we make it right. For others we can cry; but for ourselves we must act.

Sixty years ago, the great spiritual leaders of Europe were counting their losses -- in the millions! The greatChassidic courts of Poland, the prestigious yeshivas of Lithuania, were all destroyed by the Nazi hordes. What didthese righteous people do? Did they sit down and cry? Of course there were tears and mourning and indescribablegrief, but the emphasis quickly shifted to rebuilding. And today, thank G-d, those same institutions are alive andwell, thriving and pulsating with spirit and energy in Israel and the United States. The leadership focused on thefuture. And painstakingly, over time, they were able to resuscitate and rejuvenate their decimated communities.

Those leaders cried bitter tears for their fallen comrades, but for themselves they did not sit and weep. They setabout the task of rebuilding -- and succeeded in the most inspiring, miraculous way.

When we have problems (and who doesn't?), so many of us simply moan and sigh and heave a good old-fash-ioned yiddishe krechtz (Jewish groan). How many times have we sighed, What can I do? And what does that leaveus with? -- with the moaning and groaning and nothing else. In the words of the fifth Chabad Rebbe, Rabbi SholomDovBer of Lubavitch, One good deed is worth more than a thousand sighs.

Leave the krechtzing for others. If it's your problem, confront it, deal with it, work at it. You'll be surprised by theresults. •

By Yossy Goldman Rabbi Yossy Goldman is Senior Rabbi of the Sydenham Highlands North Shul since 1986, and Chairman of the

South African Rabbinical Association.

No Time to Weep


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PARSHAS VAYIGASH

For Crying Out Loud

Rabbi Mordechai Kaminetzky

It was a war of words, a battle of will, power, andcourage. Who would blink first: Yehuda orYoseph?

This is the scenario. Before the brothers departedEgypt. Yoseph had surreptitiously planted his silver gob-let in his brother Binyamin's sack. Not long after Yosephsends his brothers back to Canaan, his agents pursuethem, arrest them, and accuse them of robbery. Lo andbehold, Binyamin is caught with the silver goblet.Binyamin is brought back to the palace where Yosef sen-tences him to eternal servitude. The brothers are helpless.

Yehuda, having accepted full responsibility forBinyamin's safe return, pleads with Yoseph while he alsoprepares for battle. After all, he exclaims, "How can Ireturn to my father without my brother, lest I see the evilthat will befall my father!" (cf. Genesis 44:34).

Yoseph sees the true feeling that Yehuda and the broth-ers show for the youngest one, and cannot continue hischarade. He sends all the Egyptians from the room andbursts out, "I am Yoseph! Is my father still alive?"(Genesis 45:3) Hardly a commentary fails to expoundupon the obvious question. Yoseph was just told howeagerly Yaakov awaits the return of Binyamin. ThereforeYoseph knew that Yaakov was alive. Why now did he askthe question?

It was the Jewish wedding of the century, the daughterof Rabbi Chaim Elazar Schapiro, the illustriousMunkatzcer Rebbe, was to marry the son of the Rebbe ofPartzov. Both Chassidic dynasties were royal, aristocratic,and majestic. And the ceremony was to be equally regal.The bride and groom would ride in opulent carriages,drawn by four white horses. The wedding meal was solarge that every needy member of the community wouldbe allowed to partake. It was the Jewish event of the cen-tury!

There was so much excitement that an actual news crewcame to film the wedding. The footage would be incorpo-rated as part of the pre-feature newsreels shown atAmerican movie theatres across the Atlantic! "Imagine!"thought the reporters, "this would attract hundreds ofJewish people who had roots in Europe into the theatre!"The difficult part was to convince the Munkatzcer Rebbeto speak for the cameras. The Rebbe vehemently opposedthe frivolities and wanton ideas of the cinema, and wouldnot participate in a film. The producer assured the Rebbe

that only his voice, not his face (an assurance that provedto be false), would be presented to the large audiences.

"Rebbe, this is a wonderful opportunity for you to talkabout the Hassidic court of Munkatzc! Imagine howmany Jews would be fascinated by your life's work. Itwould also be a wonderful opportunity to send personalwishes to all your followers who have left Europe to cometo America."

Finally, the Rebbe consented. The film caught theRebbe speaking for the microphones and the camera thatwas obscured from his view. He was very brief. Tearfully,he repeated his message a few times and then turned hishead and stopped talking.

The American crew was excited. They were going topresent the wedding with its entire mystique and majestyto American audiences.

However, when the wedding film was shown inAmerican theatres the scene of the pomp and circum-stance of the ceremony was a stark contrast to the inter-view with the Rebbe. They did not see a jubilant RabbiSchapiro toasting the large audience upon the joyousoccasion. Instead, they saw Rabbi Schapiro pleading tear-fully on the silver screen. "Yidden heet der Shabbos!""Jewish Brothers! Keep the Shabbos!" Those were theonly words he said. Then he turned his face and wept.Those were the only words that the Rebbe chose to speak.(The film is now archived at the Museum of JewishHeritage in New York City.)

Yoseph had bottled his emotions from the moment hesaw his brothers upon their entry to Egypt until themoment he revealed his identity in the privacy of hischambers. But all the while of his pent-up emotion therewas one question he felt he had to ask. How is my father?Is he alive and well? Although the information wasafforded him, he felt a responsibility -- almost instinctivein nature -- to ask about his dear father's welfare. All hehad on his mind throughout the ordeal was that one ques-tion. The moment he was free to talk his piece, he instinc-tively asked, "Is my father still alive? How has he faredthrough this trying ordeal? Those words were on his heartand mind for 22 years. The moment he had the opportu-nity to speak, he did not chastise his brothers. He did notdemand retribution. He did not seek vengeance. All hedid was reveal his true feelings and asked the question thatwas quashed for 22 years. How is my father?

Rabbi Mordechai Kaminetzky



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Racheli is a young mother of 2 children. ForRacheli, the matter of modesty was never consid-ered a central matter and it was a far matter from

her heart... Till the tragic accident that happened to her,her husband, and her 2 precious young children.

7 months ago they were one their way to Eilat... Racheli,"We were all in the car including our children ages 3 and18 months old, and were on our way to vacation in Eilat.I placed the babies in an alternative bed in the back ofthe car so they will be able to sleep comfortably duringthe car trip. I covered them with a blanket and I also fellasleep, while my husband was driving. He was the onlyone awake. Suddenly, I hear my husband yelling,"Racheli, we are flipping!". Till I regained my compo-sure, I realized this is not some kind of a bad dream. Thecar drove thru security gates placed on the road and wefell inside the abyss.

The windows of the car shattered and the babies flewout thru the broken windows, each baby in a differentdirection. I was also thrown out from the car thru a win-dow and continued falling into the depth of the abyss.

My husband remained in the car, and the car flipped 4more times and fell... on me. I was confined under thecar and lost consciousness. All I saw was black and Ican't explain what I saw... I felt my soul wanting to leavemy body and killing my physical body. I spoke to theCreator of the World and asked from Him, "Please don'ttake me now. I am not yet complete. Give me a littlelonger to live and then You can take me!".

I cannot describe if I actually said this words out loud orwas subconsciously communicating, but this is what Iasked. In this undescribable method of communication,I continued talking with the Creator of the World andpromised Him that "My first step to complete myself, ifmy soul does not leave my body permenantly, I promiseI'll cover my hair", something I never did or thoughtabout before. Why I made this promise, I don't know. Inever attended any Torah classes, never saw shiurim thrutechnology, never knew that covering the hair is a centralbond between women and the Creator of the World. Butit's a fact and this is the solemn swear (neder) that Ioffered.

Suddenly, I woke up. I heard my husband yelling, "Whatdid I do? What did I do?". I heard him searching for thebabies but was unable to find them. The 18 old monthbaby was further down in the abyss, far from us. I yelledto my husband, "Eli, come to save me. I am under thecar," but he was very concerned for the children's wel-fare and didn't realize that my life was at risk.

I was confined under the car, the exhaust part of the carwas pressuring on my back and I was in a situation ofconsciousness and unconsciousness, to a point that Icould not feel the tremendeous intense pain. All I want-ed was to be saved. Suddenly, from underneath the car, Isaw my husband holding my 18 month old little baby,she was hemorrhaging and unconsciousness. I could notsee where the blood was coming from and then, I heardmy 3 year old son yelling...

I succeeded crying, a little, with the last drops of energy.I tried freeing myself but was unable to move. I was lyingunderneath the car and begging to be saved. My husbandtried to calm me because there was no way he was ableto raise the car by himself to release me. He told me thathe is going up to the road to search for help. There were

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hardly any cars passing by and the few that passed by, no one stopped.

When he returned, I told him I love him very much and said farewell forever to him. I felt I was about to die andthought to myself that HaShem did accept my request. He tried calling on the cellular the police, ambulance, MagenDavid, anyone but there was no reception. The last breathe of air left me. That moment, with strength that humanmind cannot fathom, my husband raised the car with one hand, and with the other hand, pulled me out...

I wanted to get up, to help my babies, but could not stand up. Suddenly, out of nowhere, policemen appeared withmany other rescuers to release me. I was taken to the hospital, straight to the emergency room because my lung washemorrhaging. My hip was smashed... The doctors told my husband that if I'd have arrived 1 minute later, I wouldhave been dead. It was a miracle, a genuine miracle.

During my rehab, screws were inserted to correct the hip, the bleeding lung was healed, but I was suffering terriblyfrom harsh burns in the back, results of the hot exhaust pipe pressing on me.

The children were very slightly injured, the doctors didn't believe it and had to admit that Angels protected them. It'snot humanly possible to go thru such a harsh accident and the children came out of it with only minor scrapes.Miracle of miracles.

It was very difficult for me to keep my promise which I swore to HKB'H. I was in a wheelchair for 2 months, andin a rehab in Ashdod. The evil inclination was very quick to visit me often and influence me. I told myself, "It's truethat I promised to cover my hair, but it's very difficult to do it all at once. I will cover my hair gradually..."

3 months after the accident, we decided that we want to go out with the kids in my brother's car. Our car was totaled.My brother's car would not start so my husband took it to the mechanic. Meanwhile, I took the kids out for icecream... I was sitting down and suddenly, I see my 3 year old son running and before I was able to scream, a car hithim and threw him into the air...

I was yelling terribly and the first thing that I thought, "God, what is going on here? In less than 3 months, anotheraccident...". My baby got injured in the head, he fell atop the car and from the car, onto the street floor.

Any mother that witnesses such a tragic accident would go out of her mind. I thought I was going out of my mind.The ambulance arrived and while they were checking my baby, I said to myself, "There are 'deals' to make with theCreator of the World. No games. I said I'll cover my hair and I didn't do it. These are the results...".

B'H, nothing happened to my baby, but it was a warning for me. I made a promise and did not keep it. Ever sincethe second accident, I began covering my hair all the time.

I want to tell you, "I saw death but that's minimal in comparison to see the death of our children. They are the mostprecious thing in the world. Even when a sword is placed on a person's neck, one should not give up hope. There isalways where to turn to and whom to cry to. It's only necessary to completely believe that the Creator of the Worldnever sleeps. When we call to Him, or just speak with Him, He answers. He is always near us, no matter where andwhen. Always, the Creator of the World listens when one sincerely turns to Him."

Because of Racheli's moving miracle story, many women began covering their hair.

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PARSHAS VAYECHI

By Rabbi Mordechai Kamenetzky


There is an interesting Midrashic inter-pretation of two words in this week'sportion that seem to contrast starkly

with their simple meaning. In fact, on the surface theinterpretation seems even to contradict the simple mean-ings!

Yaakov blesses Yoseph’s children and then tellsYoseph, "as for me, I have given you Shechem one por-tion more than your brothers, which I took from theEmorite with my sword and with my bow."

Rashi explains that after the brothers attacked the cityof Shechem in response to the assault on their sisterDeena, the Emorites, a neighboring country, tried toconquer Yaakov at his time of weakness, similar toJordan's joining against Israel in the Six-Day War. They,too, were miraculously defeated.

So Yaakov tells Yoseph that he acquired those landswith his sword and bow. But Rashi and the TargumUnkeles, who is known for his almost literal translationof the Torah, deviate and translate the words bow andsword in a different light. Rashi explains they are wisdomand prayer, and the Targum explains the words as twoforms of supplication.

The allegory is understandable. Prayer surely surpassesthe pen in its might over the sword. And some prayers,like a sword, are strong and sweeping and affect all thosethey strike. Others, like an arrow, reach one specific pointfrom a far distance. The question is: we know thatYaakov prayed. Of course, he prayed! Yaakov’s prayersare documented throughout the Book of Genesis. Heprays throughout his encounters with his adversaries, yetthis time he chose to talk about his battle prowess. Whythen translate his expression of utensils of war as prayer?

The Ponovezer Rav, Rabbi Yosef Kahaneman, ofblessed memory, was renowned for his efforts in rebuild-ing Torah from the ashes of the Holocaust. He estab-lished the jewel in the crown of the Torah city of B'naiBerak by building the Ponovez Yeshiva and its myriadaffiliate institutions. He built a Yeshiva for pre-teens,another for young men, and still a third for marriedscholars. He built the Batei Avos, a huge housing com-plex with hundreds of subsidized apartments for needy

families. He built schools for orphaned boys and girls inB'nei Berak, Ashdod, and numerous cities across theState of Israel.

Often, he would visit wealthy patrons in the UnitedStates, Canada, South Africa, and Europe, and appealedto them to contribute monies for the PonovezerInstitutions.

The story is told, perhaps apocryphally, that one partic-ular donor once confronted him in jest.

"Why is it, Rabbi Kahaneman," he wondered, "that allthe other Rabbis and Roshei Yeshiva who visit me nevermention money? All they talk about is Torah andmitzvos. But you come here and cut right to the chase.You don't talk about Torah or mitzvos. Your appeal,however, is, direct and to the point. You come here andsay that you need one hundred thousand dollars to finisha girls school in Ashdod. Why don't you also give me aspeech about Torah, mitzvos, and Jewish continuity?"

Rabbi Kahaneman did not draw back. He took theman's hand and looked him in the eye. Then he told hima profound statement. "You know me well. Many fundraisers talk, 'Torah, Torah, Torah,' but they mean money,money, money. I talk money, but I mean Torah, Torah,Torah."

Our Chazal, who understood the essence of Yaakov'sbeing; who saw his deep faith in running from Esav,fighting with the angel, and confronting the tragedy ofShechem; and who appreciated his travail with Lavan,understood quite well what his bow and sword were.They were very comfortable with the greatness ofYaakov’s persona, one steeped in a spirituality constantlyconnected to his Creator.

They understood that when Yaakov said sword hemeant the swift and sharp result of prayer, and when hesaid bow and arrow he meant the piercing cry of suppli-cation.

Every word, even the seemingly mundane words, ofour forebears, were the foundation of our faith and arefilled with spiritual meaning. Everything pointed to theOne Above.

It is when we as temporal beings preach prayer andespouse faith, that we must be suspect. Do we reallymean prayer & faith or are we just talking prayer butthinking bows & arrows? •


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According to the Book of Creation, every month has a Hebrew letter associated with it. The month of Tevesis associated with the letter “ayin,” the sixteenth letter of the alef-bet, which has a numerical value of sev-enty.

The Torah portion that was read in the synagogue on the first Sabbath of Teves (this year 5762) includes Genesis46, which mentions that “seventy souls” went down to Egypt. They were the children and grandchildren of Jacob.It is not merely coincidence that this group was seventy; as with many numbers in Judaism, the number seventy hasa special significance.

Earlier in Genesis, at the incident with the Tower of Babel in Chapter 10 the Torah lists seventy nations who werethe grandchildren and great-grandchildren of Noah. In Jewish writings, these are known throughout history as thenations of the world, indicating that they were stamped into creation at the time of the Tower, and something ofthose original seventy mindsets and personalities are the roots of all the nations of the world for all time. Even theirspiritual significance is carried on throughout the ages. Seventy, therefore, symbolizes the entire spectrum of humanperspective.

In this light, the seventy souls who descended to Egypt represented the entirety of the Jewish nation, andthe experience in Egypt would be engraved on the national consciousness for all time. What they expe-rienced still lives inside the souls of Jews today. Similarly, the sages say that there are seventy facetsto the Torah, seventy ways to interpret each point.

In Numbers 11:16 we find another example of this. God asked Moses to gather a groupof seventy sages to be the High Court of Israel. With seventy we expect their judgments tohave included all the possible perspectives on the situation at hand. Amongst those seven-ty there was also a requirement for each of the seventy languages of the seventynations to be understood by at least one of those sages. In other words, theirjudgment shouldn’t be based on a translator, but on a direct understandingof the litigants involved.

This High Court, known as the Sanhedrin, was seated at the Templein Jerusalem, and was called the “eyes” of the people. With wisdom,a person can see the future. A wise person also thinks throughthe potential outcome of an act before proceeding, as it saysin Koheles 2:14, “A wise man has eyes in his head.” To

come full circle, the word “ayin” that we started with is not only the name of that letter but it also means “eye”.Tying this into the month, Teves focuses us on the Temple from two angles. First, the end of Chanukah celebrates

of the return to the Temple. And secondly, the fast day on the 10th of the month marks the siege against Jerusalem.These are intense opposing reminders of our national unity, and the Temple in Jerusalem. In order to be a unitedpeople we have to appreciate all of the different perspectives we have amongst us. In order to have the benefit ofthe Torah we have to appreciate all of its facets. When we will appreciate every facet of the Torah we will be con-nected with the source of all power. When we will appreciate every personality found amongst our people, we willhave God’s blessing to be at peace in our land with the holy Temple in Jerusalem. •

C 2006 The Meaningful Life Center. All rights reserved. www.meaningfullife.com

The Month of Teves


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DirectionsPREHEAT THE OVEN TO 350

DEGREES F.

LAY THE BEEF IN A LARGE ROASTING

PAN WITH THE BONE SIDE DOWN. (THE

RIBS ACT AS A NATURAL ROASTING

RACK.) IN A SMALL BOWL MASH

TOGETHER THE GARLIC, HORSERAD-ISH, ROSEMARY, THYME, SALT, PEPPER,AND OLIVE OIL TO MAKE A PASTE.MASSAGE THE PASTE GENEROUSLY

OVER THE ENTIRE ROAST. PUT THE

PAN IN THE OVEN AND ROAST THE

BEEF UNTIL THE INTERNAL TEMPERA-TURE OF THE MEAT REGISTERS 125DEGREES F ON AN INSTANT-READ

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Calfornia Kosher KitchenRoast Prime Rib of Beef with Horseradish Crust

Ingredients1 BONE IN PRIME RIB BEEF ROAST, 3 RIBS, ABOUT 6 POUNDS

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LEAVES FROM 2 FRESH ROSEMARY SPRIGS

LEAVES FROM 4 FRESH THYME SPRIGS

1/2 CUP KOSHER SALT

1/4 CUP FRESHLY GROUND BLACK PEPPER

1/2 CUP EXTRA-VIRGIN OLIVE OIL

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Friday, January 2, 2009

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Lottie & Beck Cappuccino Drink Mixes-Powdered Cappuccino Drink Mixes Cappuccino, French Vanilla, Amaretto and Mocha flavors: These certified products containdairy ingredients as listed on the ingredient panel, but the dairy designation has been inad-vertently omitted. Future packaging will be revised.

Apple & Eve White Grape Juice-UPC 7630184001- This product is not kosher, and bears anunauthorized OU symbol on the outer cardboard wrapper that holds the individual juiceboxes. Product is being withdrawn from the marketplace. Consumers spotting this product arerequested to contact the Orthodox Union at 212-613-8241 or via email at [email protected].

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NEW KEHILLA New Torah Community, Camp, School TehachapiTorah Center(ed Community): Suited for families, indi-viduals and existing Torah organizations. Healthy,Serene, Affordable. Vacation or Year Round. Sundays:11:00 Explore, House Hunt. Monthly Speaker, Brunch.Thursdays: 1:30 PM Weekly Parsha Preview Twice thehome for half the money. Lease from: Apartments$450, Houses $900. Purchase: Houses $95K, Lots 30k,and up for nicer properties. Register interest soon forcoming year: Day School/Home School Co-op.Yeshiva high school for regional and out of town boys.Beis Medrash with online university degree options.Summer Camp: Torah-Scouts-Sports, Ages 9-14.'Learn More' contact Roger M. at: [email protected] http://pearlmancta.com/JewishTehachapiKernCountyCaliforniaNewJewishCommunity.htm -1231-

OFFICE SPACEWant to rent an office but can't afford the whole room?

EngagementsYitzy (Yisroel) Greenspan & Tzeril VagoEliana Richards & Elchanan SteinbergDina Weiss & Aryeh Leib EnglanderJared Friedman & Serah Gutman

WeddingsLiron Kopinsky to Adina AltschulerSharon Weiss & Ben Greenberg

Births - BoysShua and Rachaili Lebovics Yona and Michelle Conzevoy

Births - GirlsEdon & Shani Hirt Jason & Lisa Gruenbaum

Rent a cubicle in our office!!! Clean, casual business envi-ronment, no limitations on schedule - come in and outany time, All utilities are paid, no worry no hassle.Convenient location on W. 3rd & La CienegaCome take a look or any ????? please call 310-285-0200. The office: $350/moWant to rent whole room - $950/mo E- mail: [email protected]

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POSITIONS AVAILABLEWe need an educational aide for our 20 year old son whois attending Valley College part time. Patient, reliablemale, legally able to work in the U.S. Training and ongo-ing support will be provided. Please call 818-424-4612

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Looking for an education aide who is warm, responsible,to work in a Jewish day school in North Hollywood foran 8 year old boy. Special education experience preferredand or teaching experience. 11am -3 pm approx. Pleasecall 818-251-0046 or 818-776-9552

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Fun, Frum and Fabulous. Looking for efficient sales girlwith great people skills, and take charge attitude for retailsales position. Please call 323-864-2641.

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Looking for a trustworthy assistant to help with gen-eral office duties such as answering phones, data entry,accounts payable and receivable. Must be able to performbasic bookkeeping duties. Quick books and bookkeepingexperience a must! Payroll experience is considered a plus.Notary certificate or willingness to have one is a plus.Some medical background a plus, but not necessarily.Hours Monday - Thursday 10-4, Friday 10-2pm. Canbecome a full time job. To be considered for this position, please reply [email protected] with your contact infoand city of LA where you are living at. Compensation: 10-15/h depend on experience plus quarterly commissionsafter 6mo. Business location: La Cienega/ Wilshire Blvd.

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PESACH2009

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SAN DIEGO, CATwo pools

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Both hotels have recently completed multi-million dollarrenovations, are 100% exclusively Kosher L'Pesach and have

expansive outdoor parks with benches and walking/jogging trails.

community links issue 122

Documents

s s u e

d v e r t i s e p

parent interview included4

social skills

skills groups

west pico

aleinu family resource

rabbi yossi goldmanwords