Madison PHP November 3, 2018 DSM

Conquering Your Inner CriticDebbie Marks MS LMFT - debbie@lwcounseling.com

About Debbie

✤ Hiking in Colorado with Abbi and Ken

✤ Mechanical Engineer/Associate Project Engineer

✤ Licensed Counselor

✤ Web Development Student

Madison PHP November 3, 2018 DSM

Negativity is NormalBut not always helpful….

Madison PHP November 3, 2018 DSM

The CycleThoughts impact feelings impact actions impact results…

Madison PHP November 3, 2018 DSM

Talk BackTell yourself the positive truth. Make a new pathway in your brain.

Criticism versus Compassion

demanding

disappointing

clingy

embarrassed

a planner

fearful

anxious

dependent

different, weird

oversensitive

✤ leader, organized

✤ honest, true

✤ loving, concerned

✤ perceptive, self-aware

✤ detail oriented

✤ profound, sensitive

✤ eager, enthusiastic

✤ determined, loving

✤ unique, special

✤ sensitive, subtle

uncomfortable, intense

impulsive

indecisive

out of control

loud

perfectionist

quiet

rigid

shy

✤ perceptive, observant

✤ spontaneous

✤ careful, considerate

✤ spontaneous

✤ assertive, positive

✤ precise, exact

✤ discreet, respectful

✤ standards, ethics

✤ inner directed

Borrowed from Between Sessions Resources 2018

Give yourself a pep talk

✤ What would a friend say to encourage you? Be your own friend!

✤ Make up a “mantra” to help keep you focused on your goals

✤ Try to maintain perspective

Mindfulness (distraction)

✤ Stay in the moment, today

✤ Let go of yesterday and tomorrow

✤ Be grateful/forgive/pray

✤ Use all your five senses to ground and center (calm place)

Train your brain to THINK

✤ is it True?

✤ is it Helpful?

✤ is it Inspiring?

✤ is it Necessary?

✤ is it Kind?

✤ If not, it must go!

Healthy Brains

✤ Need regular rest and sleep

✤ Have good fuel - more water and healthy foods, less caffeine, sugar, and alcohol

✤ Live in bodies that move regularly, that get outside and get sun (get a happy light)

✤ Have fun things to think about some, like hobbies

OSMIhelp.org

Some excellent coping skills found on the discussion board:“one thing at at time”

“learn what you can control and what you cannot” (do what you CAN do)

“get movement - get outdoors” “walk - sitting is the new smoking”

“be gentle and kind - like you would to a friend”

“ask for help”“draw, read, write, music” (pursue

hobbies/interests)“more water, less caffeine/sugar/

alcohol”

Stop the critic

✤ Increased awareness

✤ Talk back/pep talk

✤ Mindfulness tools

✤ Train your brain

✤ Keep it healthy

“Arrive already loved (worthy)”

✤ 2017 Tedx Talk by Mariah Fenton Gladis (ALS for 37yrs)

✤ Create internal self support

✤ If you fall, be the first one there

✤ Live free of self criticism - talk to yourself as a treasured child

✤ Healthy inner conversation has transformational power

Madison PHP November 3, 2018 DSM

Go forth and Conquer!With your imperfect but wonderful selves and skills!

Madison PHP November 3, 2018 DSM debbie@lwcounseling.com

Thanks for being here!Please give me feedback at https://joind.in/talk/08083