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    Title:Conscience

    Author:ElizaLeeFollen

    ReleaseDate:May,2003[Etext#4041]

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    CONSCIENCE

    BY

    MRS.FOLLEN

    Illustratedwithengravings.

    CONSCIENCE.

    Theshortwintrydayswerebeginningtolengthen,thesunroseearlierandstaiduplonger.Nowandthenabluebirdwasheardtwitteringawelcometothecomingspring.Asfortherobins,theywereaspertandbusyasusual.Thelittlestreamswerebeginningtofindtheirwayoutoftheiricyprisonslowlyandwithtrembling,asiftheyfearedoldwintermighttakeastepandcatchthem,andpinchthemallupagain.

    FrankandHarryweresorrytoseetheirsnowmangrowingsmallerand

    smallereveryday;frombeingalarge,portlygentleman,hewasshrunkintoathin,shabby,ugly-lookingfellow.Hisstrongarmswereaboutfallingtotheground;hisfatnosehadentirelydisappeared,andhismouthhadgrownsobigthatyoumightlookdownhisgreatthroat,andseetheplacewhereoneoftheboysusedtogointomakehissnowshiptalk.FrankandHarrylovedalltheirwinteramusements,andwereloathtogiveupskating,sliding,andcoasting,andaboveall,snowballing.Yettheboysenjoyedthelengtheningtwilight---thehourtheirmotherdevotedtothem.

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    "Willyoupleasetogivemetwocents,Mother?"saidFrank,oneday.

    "Forwhat?"

    "Tobuyapieceofchalk."

    "Andtwoforme,Mother,"saidHarry,"forIwantapieceaswellasFrank."

    "Whatareyoubothgoingtodowithchalk?"askedtheirmother.Theyweresilent.Sheaskedagain,buttheymadenoreply."Icannotgiveyouthemoneytillyoutellmewhatyouwantofthechalk.WhyareyounotwillingthatIshouldknow?"

    Theboyscontinuedsilentforashorttime,andthenFranksaid,"Iamafraidthat,ifyouknowwhatwearegoingtodowiththechalk,youwillnotletushavethemoney."

    "Then,"repliedtheirmother,"youthinkwhatyouwanttodoiswrong.I,perhaps,oughttoinsistuponyourtellingmewhatyouwantofthechalk.Ilovetogiveyoueveryinnocentpleasure,andwhatisrightforyoutodoIthinkImayknowabout.However,ifyouwillassuremeitisfornothingwrongthatyouwantthechalk,Iwillasknomorequestions,andgiveyouthemoney."

    "Wedonotmeantodoanygreatharmwithit,"saidHarry."StillIamafraidyouwillnotquiteliketohaveusdoit,mothersaresomuchmoreparticularthanboys,youknow."

    "Tryandseeifwedisagreeaboutthismatter,"saidtheirmother.

    "ShallItell?"saidHarrytoFrank.

    "Yes,"hereplied."Itisnosuchdreadfulaffair.Let'stellmotherallaboutit.Youknow,shesaidtheotherdaythatsherememberedwhenshewasaboy."

    Theyalllaughedatthisoftenquotedblunder,andHarrybegan:"Yousee,Mother,thatyesterdayJohnGreencontrived,whilewewereinschool,andengagedindoingourlessons,tomakeagreatBonFrank'sandmyback,withapieceofchalk.Johnisagoodhandatsuchthings,andhediditsonicely,thatthemasterdidnotseehim,andneitherofussawtheBontheother.Whenwewentouttoplay,alltheboyscriedout,"Bforblockhead,Bforblunderbuss,Bforbooby,"andsoon,eversomanyothernamesbeginningwithB,andkeptpointingatus.Atlast,IsawFrank'smark,andhesawmine.Icantellyouwewerebothangryenough.NowwewanttoberevengedonJohnGreen,andhaveacapitalplan.Youseehewillbeonhisguard,andwemustbeverycunning.To-morrowisexhibitionday,andhewillhaveonhisbestdark-greenjacket,andFrankandI

    aretositoneoneachsideofhim.Youseeheisreallyadunceabouteverythingbutplayingtricks;and,whenheisaskedaquestion,hewillbescaredoutofhissenses,andnotknowwhattosay.NowFrankisgoingtopretendtohelphim,whileIwriteDunceinlargelettersonthestupidfellow'sback.JohnwillnotknowwhatIamdoing,Iamsure;and,asheisarealdunce,itwillmakeagoodlaugh;everyonewillthinkheiswellserved,andthewholeschoolwillmakefunofhim."

    "So,"saidMrs.Chilton,"youacknowledgethatyouareplanninga

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    pieceofrevenge."

    "Why,yes,Mother,"repliedFrank;"Isupposeyouwouldthinkitoughttobecalledrevenge,butIdon'tseeanygreatharminit.Schoolboysalwaysplaysuchtricks,andnoboythinkstheworseofanotherforsuchathing."

    "Youthink,"saidMrs.Chilton,"thatthisschoolmateofyourswillbesoembarrassedatansweringthequestionsthathewillnotknowwhatheisabout;youmean,oneofyou,topretendtobehisfriendandhelphim,whiletheothermakeshimappearlikeafooltotherestoftheboys."

    FrankandHarrylookedalittletroubled,andweresilentawhile.ThenFranksaid,"ItisnomorethanwhatJohnwoulddo;'tiswhathedeserves,anditistrueenoughthatheisadunce."

    "Iwilltellyou,Frank,abetterwayofbeingrevenged,"repliedhismother.

    "Whatisit,Mother?"

    "Sitbyhim,asyouintended,andwhenheistroubledandperplexed,helphimaswellasyoucan,andbeparticularlykindtohim."

    "Andsorewardhimformakingfoolsofus,"saidPrank,pettishly."No,Mother,whatyousaymaybeverygood,butIdon'twanttodosuchathingasthat."

    "IfyouweretotreathiminthewayIpropose,doyouthinkhewouldevertreatyouunkindlyagain?Wouldhenotfeeldeeplyashamedofhisconductifyouthusreturnedhimgoodforevil?"

    Theboysweresilent,butitwasevidentthattheydidnotquiterelishtheirmother'sadvice,norfeelatalldisposedtohelpJohnGreensayhislessons.

    "Iwilltellyouastory,"saidMrs.Chilton,ofamanwhoovercameevilwithgood.Agentlemanwasoncetravellingaloneinagigthroughaveryunfrequentedroad.Therewasnohouse,nosignofhumanexistencethere.Itwassostillthatthehillsandrocksanddeepwoodsgavebacktheechoofhishorse'shoofs;thesongofabirdorthechirpingofacricketseemedtofillagreatspace,andfellontheearwithastrangeandalmoststartlingeffect.Hewasobservingorratherfeelingthisextremesolitudeandstillness,whensuddenlyataturnintheroadhecameuponamanwhoplacedhimselfdirectlybeforethehorse'shead.Themanhadadark,badexpressioninhisface,andfixedhiseyeuponthetravellerinsuchawayastoconvincehimthatthemanmeanttostopandrobhim.

    Thegentlemanimmediatelydrewuphisreins,andsaidkindly,"Friend,ifyouaregoingmyway,stepintomygig,andletmetakeyouon."

    Themanhesitated,andthengotin.Myfriend,whowasaclergyman,beganimmediatelytotalkearnestlyaboutmanyinterestingthings,andkeptupalivelyconversation.Atlast,hementionedtheuncommonlonelinessoftheroad,andobservedthatitwouldbeagoodplaceforarobbery.Hethenwentontospeakofrobbers,andthenofcriminalsingeneral,andofwhathethoughtwastheright

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    waytotreatthem.Hesaidthatsocietyshouldtrytoinstructandreformthem;thatputtingthemtodeathwaswicked;that,bypatientloveandkindness,weshouldwinthembacktovirtue,thatweshouldshowthemthewaytopeaceandhonor.Heexpressedhisbelief,thattherewassomethinggoodintheheartoftheveryworstman,andsaidthathebelievedGodhadplacedawitnessofHimselfineveryhumanheart."Iamanon-resistant"--concludedtheclergyman,"andIwouldratherdiethantakethelifeofmybitterestenemy."

    Themanlistenedveryattentively.Whentheycametothenextroad,heaskedtobeallowedtogetout,ashesaidhishomelaythatway.Afterbiddingfarewell,headded,"Ithankyoufortakingmein,andforallyouhavesaidtome.Ishallneverforgetit.Youhavesavedmefromacrime.WhenImetyou,Imeanttorobyou.Icouldeasilyhavedoneso;butyourkindwordsputbetterthoughtsintomyheart.IthinkIshallneverhavesuchanevilpurposeagain.IthankGodImetyou.Youhavemademeabetterman."

    "Now,"saidMrs.Chilton,"Iwillgiveyou,boys,themoneyyouaskfor,andleaveyoutodoasyouthinkbestaboutJohnGreen."

    "But,Mother,"saidHarry,"Iamsurechalkingaboy'sbackisaverydifferentthingfromrobbingaman;andchalkingbackagainisnotlikekeepingapoorfellowinprisonallhislife,orhanging

    him."

    "Verytrue,Harry,buttheprincipleofovercomingevilwithgoodisthesameforbothcases.Theevilpurposeintherobber'sheartwasovercomebytheloveandkindnessofthemanhemeanttoinjure.Thinkthewholematterover,boys,andletmeknowto-morrowwhatyouhavedone.Ileaveyoufreetodoasyouthinkbest."

    Thenextdayafterschool,sheaskedthemwhattheyhaddoneaboutJohnGreen,andwhethertheyhadspenttheirmoneyforchalktowritedunceonhisback.

    "Iboughtapieceofchalk,"saidFrank,"forIthoughtImightwant

    verymuchtopayhimbackforhistrickuponus,butthepoorfellowlookedsofrightenedthatIdidnotwanttotouchhim."

    "Ididnotbuyanychalk,"saidHarry,"forIfeltalmostsurethat,ifIhadapieceinmypocket,Ishouldleavesomemarkonhisback."

    "Didyouthendonothingtorevengeyourselves?"askedtheirmother.

    "Frankhadsucharevengeasyouwouldapproveof,"saidHarry.

    "OneoftheexaminersaskedJohnwhereAthenswas.Thepoorfellowcouldnottell,forheisarealdunce,thoughwedidnotchalkthe

    wordonhisback.Well,hewasjustgoingtosaythathedidnotknow,whenFrankwhisperedtheanswerverysoftlyintohisear,andsavedhimfrombeingdisgraced.Ididwant,justthen,towritedunceonJohn'sback;but,onthewhole,Ipitiedhim,and,whenIheardhim,aftertheexamination,thankFrank,andsay,"IamsorryforwhatIdidtheotherday,"Ididfeelthatitwasbettertoovercomeevilwithgood,thoughitcomeshard,Mother,sometimes."

    "Verytrue,"saidMrs.Chilton;"todorightisnotalwayseasy.Atfirst,itisperhapsalwayshard,butitgrowseasierandeasier,

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    themorewetry;till,atlast,thatwhichwaspainfulbecomespleasant.Somegoodperson,Iforgetwho,said,"WheneverIwanttogetoveradislikeofanyperson,Ialwaystrytofindanopportunitytodohimaservice."Tellme,Frank,ifyoudonotfeelmorekindlytowardsJohnGreen,sinceyoudidhimthatkindness."

    "IsupposeIdo,"saidPrank."Myangerisgone,atanyrate."

    "Wedon'twantcandlesyet,dowe,Mother,"saidHarry."Thereisthemoonjustovertheoldpinetree,andthereisabrightlittlestarwaitinguponher.Nowisourstorytime.Canyounotmakeupsomethingtotellus?"

    "Icannotthinkofanything,"saidMrs.Chilton."IbelieveIspunallthecobwebsoutofmybrainwhenItoldyouabouttheoldgarret."

    "Didyounotsaytous,theotherday,Mother,"saidFrank,"that,whenyouwereatuncleJohn'smanyyearsago,beforewewereborn,youwrotedownsomestories?IthinkyoutoldauntSusanthatyoumeant,whenwewereoldenough,toreadthemtous."

    "Idid,Frank,andwhenthelightcomes,Iwillreadsomeofthem.Meantime,Iwilltellyouoneortwolittleanecdotes.Iwasdining

    yesterdaywithagentlemanwhotoldmethisstory.HewasreturningfromEnglandtoBostoninoneofthefineroyalsteamers.Whennotveryfarfromtheendofthevoyage,heandsomeothergentlemendeterminedtoindulgethemselveswiththepleasureofgivingadinnerasgoodastheyhadeverydaytothesailors.Isupposeyouknowthatinthesesteamersthepassengerspayalargepriceforthepassage,andarefeastedeverydaywithluxuries.Thegentlemanaskedthecaptain'sleavetogivethisdinner,andwishedhimtoorderit;butthecaptainreplied,"Iwillhavenothingtodowithsuchnonsense.Iwillgivestewardorderstodowhateveryoubidhim;andIdon'tcarewhatyoudo,onlyImustnotappearinit."Accordingly,thegentlemangavethestewardorderstoprovidetheverybestdinnerthattheshipcouldafford,tellinghimtoprepare

    fourcourses,andaddingthatifthedinnerwasinanyrespectinferiortowhatthecabinpassengershaditwouldnotbepaidfor.Thestewardwasdesiredtokeepitaprofoundsecretwhoorderedthedinner,andnottosayanythingaboutitbeforehand.

    Whenthedaycame,thesailorswereastonishedthattheydidnothavetheirdinnerattheusualhour.Presentlyallhandswerecalledondeck.Thiswassuchanunusualthingwhenallwasquietintheship,thattheywerestillmorepuzzled.Thegentlemenmeanttohavethemdineinthecabin;butthecaptainadvisedagainstthisonthegroundthatsailorswouldfeelconfinedinthecabin,andwouldnotenjoythemselves.Sothedinnerwasservedondeck.Whenthesailorswereassembled,andwereorderedtotaketheirplacesatthedinner

    beforethem,theyobeyed,lookinggreatlyastonished.Theywerefirsthelpedtosoup--thentomeatsofallsorts--thenpuddings,pies,&c.--thennuts,oranges,raisins,figs,andwine.Atfirst,theystared,asiftheywereinthelandofdreams;butpresentlytheenchantingrealitiesbeforethemwerewelcomedandconsumedwiththegreatestrelish.Theywerewaiteduponinthemostrespectfulmanner.Theirfeasthadnodrawback.Allwasgoodandagreeableaspossible.

    Thegentlemansaidhehadbeenatmanygranddinners,buthadnever

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    enjoyedonesomuchasthis.

    Thesailorstriedtofindouttheirbenefactor,butnoonewouldtellthem.

    Atlasttheirsuspicionsfellupontherightman,himwhotoldmethestory.

    Theychosetheoldestoftheirnumbertowaituponhiminthenameofthewhole,toexpresstheirthanks."Whentheoldmanapproachedme,"saidthegentlemantome,"hetookoffhishatandwasgoingtospeak,butthetearscameinhiseyes,andhecouldnot.Hewentaway,andpresentlyreturned;butagainhelosthisself-command,andturnedaway.Atlast,herecoveredhimselfenoughtospeak,andthesewerehiswords:"'Tisthefirsttime,sir,thatwewereevertreatedlikemen."

    Thecaptain,wholaughedatthewhimofthesegentlemen,saidafterwardsthathehadneverhadsuchworkfromhissailorsashehadfromthattimetotheendofthevoyage.

    Iwilltellyouyetanothertruestory.

    Therewasapoorgirlwhowasillofaconsumption.Shedidnot

    suffermuch,yetwasprettycertainthatsheshouldnevergetwell.Shewasveryhappy,however,forshehadmanybeautifulthoughtstokeephercompanyinthesickroom.

    Onedayagoodmancametovisither,andtoldherofaschoolinCanada,toteachcoloredpeoplewhohadbeenslaves,andhadrunawayfromtheirmasters.YouknowthatinCanadaAmericanslavesbecomefreeEnglishsubjects.

    Hetoldherthathewastryingtogetmoneytopayteachersinthisschool.

    Thepoorgirlwasverymuchinterested,wishedmuchtocontribute

    something,andfeltgrievedatherpoverty.Presentlyherfacelightedupwithasadsmile."Ihave,"saidshe,"onethingofvaluewhichIcouldgiveyou,but,"(andshelookedverysad,)"itwouldbehardpartingwithit.Mymothergaveittome."Shewenttoadrawer,andtookoutofitagoldnecklace.Then,asifsheweretalkingtoherself,shesaid,"Howsweetlymymothersmileduponmewhensheputthisaroundmyneck!Icannotwearitnow,myneckissothin,andisalwayscoveredup.Shewouldwishmetogiveitforthispurpose,Iknow.Yes,shewouldlikeIshoulddoit.ButthenIcannotbeartogiveitaway.Itwashers;sheworeitherself.Ishallnotkeepitagreatwhilelonger,atanyrate.IcandesiremyuncletogiveittotheschoolwhenIamgone."Shecoveredherfacewithherhands,butyoucouldseehertearsthroughherthin,

    emaciatedfingers.

    Herfriend,whohadtoldherabouttheschool,simplytopleaseandinteresther,beggedhernottothinkanymoreofgivingawaythenecklace,andspoketoherofsomethingelse.

    "No,"saidshe,"Icannotkeepit,nowthatithascomeintomymindthatIoughttogiveittoyoufortheschool.Youmusttakeit.Forgivemyweakness;thethoughtofmydeardepartedmotherbringsthetearstomyeyes."

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    "Thinkagain,then,beforeyougiveawaythispreciousnecklace,"saidthegoodman.

    Sheputthenecklaceintohishand,andsaid,asshedidso,"Ihavethoughtofitagain,andIhavedecidedtogiveit."

    Hetookit,andleftthegenerous-heartedgirl,prayingthatshemightrecover,butfearingthatheshouldneverseeheragain.

    Notlongafterthis,inasteamboat,hemetagentlemanwithwhomhehadmuchconversationuponvarioussubjects;amongotherstheinstitutionfortheinstructionofthepoorrunaways.Hementionedamongotherthingsthispoorgirl'sgift,andhergriefatpartingwithhermother'sgoldnecklace."Ihated,"saidhe,"totakeit.Shewillnotstayherelong,andherpleasuresareveryfew."HementionedalsothenameofthetowninNewHampshirewhereshelived.

    "Thatismynativeplace,"saidthegentlemantowhomhewasrelatingthestory."Willyouletmeseethenecklace?"

    "Certainly,"saidthemissionary,andhetookitfromhispocket.

    "Whatsumofmoneyshallyouobtainforthisnecklace?"

    "Ihavehaditweighed,"saidhe,"andIshallgetsomuchmoneyforit,"namingthesum.

    "Areyouwillingtosellittomeforthatsum?"

    "Certainly;thatisallIcanobtainforit."

    Thebargainwasconcluded.Thestrangerpaidthesum.Then,puttingthenecklaceintohisownpocket,hesaid,"Sheshallhaveitforanewyear'sgift."

    Nowletus,onthefirstofJanuary,visitthepoorsickgirlagain.Earlyinthemorning,someonehandsheralittleparcel--sheopensit,andthereisherpreciousnecklace,thegiftofherdearmotherintheheavenlyland.Itisaccompaniedbyashortnoteinwhichthewriterbegshernottopartwiththenecklaceagainwhileshelives,buttoconsideritherowntodoasshepleaseswithitatherdeath.

    Thestranger,whohadpurchasedthenecklace,andsentitbacktothepoorgirl,knewthetruevalueofriches,andunderstoodandenjoyedtheluxuryofdoinggood,ofmakingthepoorandthesorrowfulrejoice.Hewasthesamemanwhoplannedthedinner."

    Aftertea,Mrs.Chiltontookouthermanuscriptbook.

    "ThestoryIshallread,"saidshe,"isaverypainfulone,butsadlytrue.Ifitmakesyouveryunhappy,youmusttrytoletitsaveyoufromcommittingthefaultwhichwassoseverelypunished.Alltheessentialfactsaretrue,asIshallreadthemtoyou.

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    "ITISONLYATRIFLE."

    "Besure,myson,"saidMr.Pratt,ashelefthiscountingroom,inPhiladelphia,"besurethatyousendthatmoneytoMr.Reidto-day;directitcarefully,andseethatallisdoneinproperformandorder."

    "Yes,sir,"repliedGeorge,"Iwill."

    Georgefullyintendedtoobeyimplicitly.Hewas,inthemain,desiroustodoright;buthehadonegreatfault.Whenhehadasmalldutytoperform,hewasapttosayandthink,"O,thatisonlyatrifle.Whyshouldwelaysomuchstressontrifles?"Hewouldoftensay,whenanyonefoundfaultwithhimfortheneglectofasmallduty,"Iamsureitisonlyatrifle."

    George,assoonashehadfinishedsomethinghewasabout,wrotetheletteraccordingtothedirectionsgivenhim,carefullyenclosedthemoneyinit,nicelyfoldedandsealedit.Justashewaspreparingtodirectit,ayoungmanopenedthedoorofthecountingroomingreathaste,andbeggedhimtogowithhimthatmoment,tospeaktosomeonewhowasthenpassing.

    "Icandirectandcarrytheletter,"saidGeorge'syoungerbrother;"Iknowtowhomitistogo,andIcansenditjustaswellasyou."

    Georgehadaslightfeelinginhisheartthatheoughtnottoleavethislettertoanyonetodirect;buthisbrotheragainsaid,"IshouldthinkIcoulddosuchatriflingthingasthat;Icansurelydirectaletter,thoughIcannotwriteoneyet."

    Frankwastheyoungerapprentice,andwasanxioustogetforwardanddowhatGeorgedid.

    "Well,"saidGeorge,"youmaydoit,butbesureyoudoitright.JohnReid,youknow,isthename;"andhewentwithhiscompanion.

    "Itisonlyatrifle,"hesaidtohimself,asherememberedhisfather'scharge."Ihavedoneallthatisreallyimportant.Itisoflittleconsequencewhodirectsandcarriestheletter."Sohechasedawaytheslightcloudthathungoverhismindasheleftthecountingroomwithhisfriend.

    Theseslightcloudsthatriseinthesoul'shorizon,soprophetic,sofullofmercyorofterrorasweregardorslightthem!"Whydowenotlearntheirmeaning?Whyaretheynotevermessengersofloveandpeacetous?HadGeorgestoppedandconsidered,perhapshewouldnothavedoneashedid,perhapshewouldnothavecalledthisdutyatrifle,andwouldnothaveleftthecountingroomtillhehadperformedeverytittleofhisfather'scommand.

    Theletterwasdirectedandsent.Frankdidaswellasheknewhow.

    WhenGeorgereturned,heasked,"HaveyoudirectedthelettertoMr.JohnReid?"

    "Yes,Ihave,andcarriedittotheoffice."

    "DidyouenclosethatmoneytoMr.Reid,George?"askedhisfather,whenhenextsawhim.

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    "Yes,sir,"Georgereplied,withaslighthesitation,which,however,hesoongotover;"for,"saidhetohimself,"Ienclosedthemoneycarefully;whatdoesitmatterwhetherFrankorIdirectedtheletter?"Sohespokeoutfreelytohisfather.

    "Allright,father;theletterisonitswaytoOhio."

    Unfortunatelyhisfatherhadnotnoticedhishesitation,wassatisfied,andaskednofurtherquestions.

    AgainGeorgecheckedthemonitionsofhisconscience.Againhesaidtohimself,"It'sonlyatrifle."Hehadyettolearnthatnodutyisatrifle.

    Weekspassed,andtherewasnoacknowledgmentofthemoney.AtlastaletterarrivedfromMr.ReidtoMr.Pratt,requestinghim,ifconvenient,topaythetwohundreddollarspromisedtohimsomeweeksbefore.

    Mr.Reidwasapoorman,towhomtwohundreddollarswasanimportantsum.

    Mr.Prattagainquestionedhisson,andwasagainassuredthatthe

    moneyhadbeensent,andwrotetoMr.Reidaccordingly,advisinghimtoinquireatthepostoffice.

    Therehappenedtobeayoungmanintheoffice,bythenameofHarryBrown,whosemotherwasawidow.Shewaspoor,andastrangerinthetown.Hersonhadobtainedhisplaceonaccountofhisquickintelligence,andbecausehecouldalsowriteaverygoodhand.Strongsuspicionsfelluponhim.Hewasquestionedabouttheletter,andatlastMr.Reidaccusedhimofthetheft.

    Theyoungman'sindignationwasuncontrollable;heturnedwhitewithanger;hecouldnotspeak;hestammeredandclenchedhisfists,andatlastburstintotearsandlefttheoffice.

    AllthiswastakenfortheagonyofdetectedguiltandneitherthepostmasternorMr.Reidattemptedtostophim,forneitherofthemwishedtohavehimpunished,andtheyhopedtorecoverthemoneybygentlermeans.

    Wewillnowchangethescene.Letusenterthissmall,neatcottage.Therearebuttworoomsonthefloor.Oneiskitchenandparlor,theotherabedroom.Asortofladderinonecornerintimatesthatinthesmallatticisalsoasleepingplace.Asmalltableisspreadfortwopeople;itisverycleanandnice,buteverythingthatyouseeindicatespoverty.Anoldwoman,withasweetbutsorrowfulcountenance,sitsbythesmallwindow,lookinganxiouslyoutofit

    forsomeonewhoyoumightsupposewastosharehersimplemealwithher,whichstoodnicelycoveredupatthefire,awaitinghisarrival.Sheistalkingtoherself.

    "Onetreasureisyetleftmeinthisworld--mynoble,beautiful,braveson.Godblesshim;forhimIamwillingtolive.Therehecomes;howfastheruns!buthowredandheatedhelooks!Whatisthematter,Harry?whathashappened?"sheexclaimed,asheentered;"areyousick?"

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    "Yes,Mother,andIshallneverbewellagain.Ihavebeenaccusedofstealing,andMr.Reidandthepostmasterbothbelieveit.Icannotlivehereanylonger.Ihavejustcomefromtherecruitingoffice;IhaveenlistedfortheMexicanwar,andIhopeIshallbeshot;Igothedayafterto-morrow.Iwillneverbeseenhereagain.Tothinkthatanyoneshoulddaretoaccusemeoftheft!WhydidInotknockhimdown?Ihatetheworld,Ihateallmankind,Ihatelife,Iwanttodie.Ifitwerenotforyou,Mother,IbelieveIshouldkillmyself.OMother,Mother!howcanIlive?"Andthepoorfellowlaidhisheadinhismother'slapandweptbitterly.

    Thepoormother--shespokenot,shedidnotweep;shelaidherhandsuponherson'shead,andlookedupthroughthethinroofofherpoorcottage,far,farintotheeverlastingheavens,wherealonearepeaceandhopetobefound.InherdeepagonyshecalledupontheAlmightyforaid.Shelookedlikeamarbleimageofdespair.

    "Imustpreparetogo,"atlasthersonsaid;"Ihaveenlisted,andImustbeready."Whatwillyoudowithyourself,Mother?"

    "Gowithyou,mychild.Whereveryougo,thereIgotoo.Icancookforthecamp.Youhavedonewrong,myson,inenlistingasasoldier;whynotcomefirsttome?Yourinnocencewillyetbeproved.Whywereyousorash?Allmighthaveyetbeenwellwithus."

    "Icannotbearit,Mother;Imustgo."

    "ThenIgowithyou;Iwillneverdesertyou."

    "ButO,youwillbekilledwithfatigueandexposure.Mother,dearMother,staytillIcangetyouanewhome."

    "Igo,myson,whereyougo,"saidhismother;"myonlyhomeiswithyou."

    Intwodaystheirfewpossessionsweresold,andtheyweregone.

    WewillnowreturntothecountingroomwhereourTRUEstorybegan.Somemonthshadpassed;thefatherandsonarethere."George,"saidMr.Pratt,"Icannotbutfearyoumadesomemistakeaboutthatletter.Moneyisseldomstolenoutofletters.Wereyouveryparticularaboutthenameandplaceinyourdirection?"

    "Thetruthis,Sir,thatFrankdirectedtheletter;Iwroteandfoldedandsealedit;butjustasIwasgoingtodirectit,HarryFlintcalledmetospeaktosomeone,andIletFrankdirectit;butItoldhimtobesuretodirectittoMr.JohnReid,andIknowhedidso,justaswellasifIhadseenit."

    Thefatherlookedmuchdispleased."Youdidwrong,George,aftermy

    particularorders."

    "Why,Father,Iamsureitwasofnoimportancewhichofusdidit.Thatwasonlyatrifle,Iamsure.ItoldFrankthename,andheknowswhereMr.Reidlives.Ishouldnotthinkyouwouldblamemeforthis--"

    "Idoblameyouverymuch.YoushouldnothaveleftthistoFrank.Ichargedyoutobeverycareful.Thiswasyourownduty,andyoushouldhaveperformedityourself.Yourneglectwillmostlikely

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    costmetwohundreddollars,forIshallsendthemoneytoMr.Reid;heofcourseisnottoloseit.YoucannotbesurethatFrankdirectedthelettercorrectly;heisnotusedtothework."

    Georgebegantofeelthatitwasnotatrifletoleaveanotherpersontodirectaletterofimportance;hefeltverysorryatthethoughtoflosinghisfather'smoney.Poorfellow!hehadaworsepainthanthistoendure.

    Thenextmorning,whentheletterscamefromthepostoffice,therewasonefromMr.Reid.Themissingletterhadatlastarrived,andthetwohundreddollarswereinit.Theletterhadbeenmisdirected.Therewasamistakeinthenameoftheplace.TheletterhadbeensenttoWashington,whencehehadjustreceivedit,asthepersonwhoseofficeitistoreadtheselettersknewhimpersonally,andsocouldcorrectthemistake.Hethenrelatedthesadstoryoftheclerkandhispoormother.Headdedthathewenttothepoorwoman'shousetheverydaythatheleftthetown,intendingtosatisfyhisminduponthequestionofherson'sguilt,ofwhichhebegantodoubt--intending,ifhefoundtheyoungmaninnocent,totakehimbackintotheoffice,andifnot,totrytoinducehimtorestorethemoney,andgo,torecoverhischaracter,tosomeotherplace,towhichhewouldhavehelpedhimtoremove.Hewastoolate.Hefoundthehouseempty."Ipitytheperson,"hesaid,"whomisdirectedthat

    letter--hewastheunconsciouscauseoftheruinoftwoexcellentbeings.Wemayblametheyoungman'sviolence,andmaycallhimfoolishandpassionate;yetitwasadeephatredofeventheappearanceofsinandshamethatmadehimdosomadanactionastoenlistinawickedwar."

    Mr.Prattnowreadthislettertohisson.Georgecoveredhisfacetohidehisshameandsorrow;hisheartwasreadytobreakwithagony.Hegroanedaloud.Hespokenotoneword.

    Georgewassufferinginsilencethebitterestofallpainswhichagoodmindcanendure,--thatofbeingthecauseofmiserytoothers,throughone'sownwrong-doing.Afterafewmoments,hestartedup

    andexclaimed,"Imustsendwordtothepoorfellowthatthemoneyisfoundandhisinnocenceproved;letmedowhatIcantorepairtheevilIhavecaused.IfIwritetothepostmasterandtellhimthestory,hewilltakethepoorfellowbackagain.Ihavesomemoneyofmyown,Father,topayforthetravellingexpensesoftheboyandhismother.Allperhapsmayyetberight.Icanwork.Iwilldoanythingforthem.PoorHarryBrown--soproudandsohonest!O,Father!Ihatemyself.ButhowshallIsendhimword?thepostisnotcertain;letmethink.BillSmithsaidhewasgoingtothewar,ifhecouldgetmoneyenoughforhisjourney.Hewouldtakemyletter.I'llbeafterhim,andgethimoffinnotime."

    AwayflewGeorge;hegaveBillSmiththemoney,toldhimthestory,

    andsenthimoffforthatverynight,Georgethenwrotetothepostmaster,andimploredhimtowriteimmediatelytoHarry,andofferhimagaintheplaceintheoffice.Georgewenttobedwithaheavyheart,stillwiththehopethatpoorHarryhadnotbeenkilled.

    NowletusfollowHarryandhisoldmothertoMexico.ManyweekshavepassedsinceweleftGeorgemourninghisfault,andsendingupprayersforthelifeofpoorHarry.Itisafewdaysafterabattle.Ontheground,inthecornerofasmalltent,liesapoorsoldier.

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    Bandagesstainedwithbloodarelyingabout.Thepoorsuffererisverypale,andhisfaceshowsmarksofpain.Anoldwoman,whosefaceisfullofanxiouslove,sitsbyhissideandholdshishand.Theyoungmanliftstheoldwitheredhandtohislipsandkissesit;helooksupthroughthethincanvasofhistent,andsays,"ThankGod,dearMother,thatyouareherewithmenowtotakecareofme,elseIthinkIshoulddie.Forgivemyrashness;ifIlivewillyetbeagoodsontoyou.Iknewwasnotathief,andthatoughttohavebeenenoughforme.Iwaswrongtobesoangry,andtoforgetyou,whomIoughttohavestaidbyandtakencareof,asIpromisedfatherIwould.Forgiveme,dearMother.PerhapsIshallbeabettermanwithonelegthanIwaswithtwo."

    Whilethepoorfellow,whohadlosthislegthefirstdayhewenttobattle,wasslowlyutteringthesewords,thetearswererunningfastdownthehollowcheeksofhisoldmother,butgentle,quiettears,asthoughtheheartofherwhoshedthemwasresignedandpeaceful.

    "IthankGodforyourlife,myson.Yourfightingdaysareover;theyhavebeenshort;butusefulnessandhappinessareyetbeforeyou,thoughyougothroughlifemaimed.Ishallyetseeyousmilingandhappyagaininourcottage,yourinnocenceproved,yourplacerestored,andfriendsallaroundyou."

    "Howcanthatbe?"saidHarry;"thereisonlymywordandcharacterasevidenceofmyhonesty.Icannotgobacktotheoldplace--never,never,Mother.WhatshallIdo?Betterdiethanlivedisgraced."

    "Havenofear,Harry;Ihavenone.Iamsureallwillbewell,andyourhonestyproved.Sogotosleep,asthesurgeondirected.Havefaith;youhaveshowncourage."Hismothersmoothedtheclothesoverhim,andgentlystrokedhishand,andhewassilent,andfellasleep.

    Presently,thesurgeonlookedin.Hewasakind-heartedman,andknewtheirstory.Hesaidsoftly,"WhentheboywakesIhavesomenewsforhimthatwilldohimmoregoodthanIcan."

    Harry,whowasjustwaking,startedandexclaimed,"Whatnews?tellmethisminute!isthemoneyfound?"

    "Come,Mr.Gunpowder,keepquiet,ifyouplease,oryou'llnothearanythingfromme."

    "Yes,yes;Iamasquietasalamb,onlybequick.Tellmethenews."

    "Well,herearetwolettersthatagreatsixfootchaphasbrought,notforyourlambship,Mr.Harry,butforyourgoodmother,whotakesthingslikearationalbeing."

    Hegavetheletterstothemotherandleftthetent,sayingwithasmile,"Don'tbetoohappy."

    TheletterfromthepostmasterwastoaskHarry'spardonfortheinjustice,andtooffertheplaceintheoffice."Thereisnoone,"itconcluded,"IcouldtrustasIcanyou."

    TheotherwasfromGeorge,asfollows:--

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    "DEARMR.BROWN:Myneglectofmydutyindirectingaletterwastherealcauseofthesuspicionthatfelluponyou.Icanneverforgivemyself.Icanhardlyhopeyoucanforgiveme.Ifyouwillbegenerousenoughtotrytodoso,youwillmakemelessunhappy.IfyouacceptthesumIencloseyoutomeettheexpensesofyourjourney,Ishallbelessmiserable.Bytakingityouwillprovethatyoupityandforgiveme,--theunintentionalcauseofsomucheviltoyouandyourexcellentmother."Georgeenclosedacheckforfivehundreddollars,allhehadsavedfromhisearningsasaclerkforthetwoyearspast.

    "ThankHeaven,myinnocenceisproved!"saidthehonestfellow."But,Mother,Idon'twantthemoney."

    "Itiskindertotakeit,"saidthemother.

    Harrysubmitted.Erelong,hewasabletomoveoncrutches.Heandhismotherwereagainintheirlittlecottage.Harryreceivedtheheartiestwelcomefromhistowns-peoplewhenhewasseenagainwithhisoneleginhisplaceinthepost-office.

    Georgeoftenwenttothetown.HisfirstvisitwasalwaystoMrs.Brown.Hetreatedherasifshewerehismother,andhersonwastohimasabrother.Hewasoftenheardtosay,"ThesoundofHarry

    Brown'scrutchesalwaysremindsmesorrowfullythatwhenthereisadutytoperforminvolvingtherightsofothersweshouldneversay,Itisonlyatrifle."

    "Itseemstome,"saidFrank,"thatIshouldneverhavebeenhappyagaintohavecausedsomuchmiserybytheneglectofmyduty;andyet,Mother,itdidseematrifle."

    "Mymother,"repliedMrs.Chilton,"saidtome,whenIwasagirl,Neverconsideranyduty,eversogreat,astoodifficult,orany,eversosmall,astootrifling.Ihaveneverforgottenherwords,andthoughIhavenotalwaysbeenfaithfultothislesson,ithasoftensavedmefromwrong-doinganditsconsequentunhappiness."

    Afterashortsilence,Mrs.Chiltonsaidtoherboys,Thenextstoryisnotsopainful,butitillustratesthesametruth--that,inmattersofconscience,nothingistrifling.Youshallnowhearhowhappyagoodconsciencecanmakeoneevenundertheseveresttrials.

    Onepleasantafternoon,myfriendandIwereseatedintheneatlittleroomwhichservedoldSusanVincentforparlor,kitchen,andbed-room.Shewassittinginanicearm-chairwhichherinfirmitiesmadenecessaryforhercomfort.Akindfriendhadsentittoher.Shehadonanicecleanginghamgown,ahandkerchiefcrossedonherneck,inthefashionoftheShakers,andaplaincap,aswhiteasthedrivensnow,coveredhersilverlocks.Alittleroundtable,

    polishedbyfrequentscouring,stoodbesideher;onitwasherknittingwork,Baxter'sSaints'Rest,andtheBible;thelastlayopenbeforeher.Shewasreadinginitwhenweentered.Asherdoorwasopenandshedidnothearveryquickly,wehadanopportunityofobservingherbeforesheperceivedus.Therewasthatdeepinterestinhermannerofreadingthisholybook,asshewasleaningoveritwithherspectacleson,entirelyabsorbed,thatmadeherresembleapersonwhowasexaminingatitledeedtoanestatewhichwastomakehertheheirofuncountedtreasures.Shewasindeedreadingwithherwholesoultheproofsshetherefoundofherclaimtoaninheritance

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    thatmakesallearthlyrichesseempoorindeed.

    "Iamgladtoseeyou,dear,"washeraffectionatewelcometome;"doIknowthisladywithyou?"

    "No,"Ianswered;"sheismyfriendwhomItoldyoutheotherdayIshouldbringtoseeyou."

    "Iamgladtoseeherifsheisyourfriend,"shereplied.

    "Iwantyou,Susan,ifyouarestrongenoughto-day,torepeattomyfriendthatlittleaccountofyourselfthatyouwereoncekindenoughtogiveme."

    "What,thewholestory?"saidSusan,"beginningatthebeginning,asthechildrensay?"

    Susanwassilentaminuteortwo,asiftocollectherthoughts,andthensaid,Ihavealwaysbelieved,that,thoughitseemedstrangethatsuchagood-for-nothingcreatureasIamshouldbespared,andotherstakenaway,that,maybe,Iwaslefttogivemytestimonyforsomegoodpurpose,andthatmyexperiencemightdosomegoodtopoorpilgrims.For

    "Itisastraightandthornyroad,Andmortalspiritstireandfaint;ButtheyforgetthemightyGodWhofeedsthestrengthofeverysaint."

    Susanknewhalfthehymnbookbyheart,andlovedtorepeathymnssowell,thatshecouldhardlyhavetoldherstorywithoutthispreface.Sheimmediatelybeganasfollows:--

    "Myfather,whowasasailor,losthislifeatseawhenIwastwoyearsold;mymotherneverhadverygoodhealth,andaboutsixyearsafterwardshefellintoaconsumption.Shelivedonlyayearaftershewastakensick.Iwastooyoungtoremembermuchofher,butI

    haveadistinctrecollectionofseeingheroftensittingbyalittlestandlikethis,withanopenBibleuponit;andonceIwasstruckwithherlookinguptoheavenwithherhandsclaspedforalongtimeasifshewerepraying,andthenlookingatme,andthenatthebook;andIsawbigtearsrollingdownhercheeks.Shecalledmetoher,andsaid,withanearnestbutbrokenvoice,Godsavemychildfromtheevilthatisintheworld!andgiveherthetestimonyofagoodconscience.

    ThesewordsIcouldnotforget,forthenextdayshedied.Weforgetmanythingsinthisworld,ladies,butthewordsofadyingmotherwecannothelpremembering.ThiswasthefirsttimeIhadeverseendeath,buttherewassuchapeaceful,happyexpressioninmy

    mother'sface,thatitdidnotseemveryterribletome,tillIfoundtheyweregoingtocarryheraway;indeed,IthinkImusthavebelieveditwassleep,andexpectedhertoawake;for,whentheytookherfromme,Iwashalfoutofmysenses,andscreamedforthemtoleavememymother.

    Akindoldlady,afriendtomymother,tookmeinherlapandputherarmsroundme,andtriedtosootheandcomfortme.Shetoldmemymotherhadgonetoheaven;thatitwasonlyherbodythatwasdead;butthathersoulwasliving,andwasgonetoheaven."She

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    willneverbesickorunhappyanymore;sheisgonetoGod,andshewillliveforeverwithJesusChristandallgoodbeings."

    "ButIwanttoseeher,"saidI.

    "Youwillseeheragain,Idoubtnot,mychild,ifyouaregood,"theoldladysaid.PerhapsIshouldnothaverememberedsoexactlywhatshesaid,ifshehadnotfrequentlyrepeatedthesamethingtome,andifIhadnotlovedmymothersomuch.

    Thisexcellentladytookmehomewithher,anditwastohergoodnessIoweeverything.Shehadlostnearlyallherpropertybythefailureofamerchanttowhomshehadlentmoney;shehadsupportedherselfbytakingboarders.Iwasperfectlydestitute;mymotherhadmadeouttogetalivingbytakinginsewing,butleftnothing.Thelastyearofherlifeshecouldnothavegotalongwithoutmyassistance,andwhatwasgivenherbyhercharitableneighbors;andforthelastthreemonthsshecouldnotevenmakeherbed,orcleanherownroom,ordoherlittlecooking,withoutmyhelp.AndO,howhappyIwaswhenIwashelpingmydearmother!Nowatthismoment,whenIamsoold,andforgetsomanythings,howwellIrememberherandallshesaid!ItseemsasifIcouldhearhersay,"WhatshouldIdowithoutyou,mydearSusan."ItseemstomeasifIwouldratherliveoveragainthosedays,whenIwas

    tryingtohelpandcomfortmysickmother,thananyofmywholelife.Childrenarenotawarehowmuchtheycandofortheirparents,nordotheyknowwhatablessedremembranceitwillbetothemtothinkthattheyhavelessenedthesufferingsofasickmother.Alltherichesintheworldwouldnotaffordthemsuchhappiness.

    Mrs.Brown,thekindladywhotookmehome,toldmethatshewouldsendmetoschool,andthatIshouldhaveahomeatherhouse;butthat,asshewasverypoor,sheshouldexpectmetoexertmyselfwhenIwasnotatschool,anddoallIcouldtohelpinthehouse;andthatImustimprovemytimeatschool.Shegavemeagreatdealofgoodadvice,andtoldmeImustnotimitatethebadconductthatImightsee;andthatImustneverdoanythingwithoutaskingmy

    consciencewhetheritwasrighttodoit.IremembersheaskedmeifIknewwhatmyconsciencewas.IwasnotquitesurethatIdid;soIsaid,IdidnotknowwhetherIdid.ThensheaskedmeifIeverremembereddoingwrong.

    "Oyes,ma'am,"Isaid;"Inevershallforgetplayingwithmymother'sbottleofcoughdrops,whenshetoldmenotto,andspillingthemallout.Ididnottellherofitatfirst,andshecouldnotgetanymoretillnextday;andeverytimeshecoughed,itseemedasifmyheartwouldbreak;andIhatedmyself,andcouldnotbearitatalltillItoldherIhadplayedwiththebottleandspilledthedrops."

    "Itwasyourconscience,Susan,"theoldladysaid,"thatwassotroubled;itwasyourconsciencethatsaidyoumusttellyourmother;thisisGod'switnessinyourheart;alwaysdoasthatdirectsyou,andcomewhatwill,Susan,youcanbearit."

    Iwassogratefultomykindfriendforhertendercareofme,thatIattendedtoallshesaidtome,andneverforgotit;andithasbeenthesourceofhappinesstomethroughlife.IhadnotbeenlongintheschoolbeforeIhadatrialofmyconscience,andIthankHimwhoisthegiverofallstrengththatIresistedthisfirst

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    temptation.

    Onedaytheschoolmistressleftherpenknifeopenuponherdesk,whenshewentoutofherroomduringtherecess;nearlyallthegirlstookitintotheirhandstolookatit,forithadanumberofblades,andwasrathercurious;someofthemtriedtheknifetoseehowsharpitwas.Wehadbeentoldnottomeddlewithherthings,andallofusknewitwaswrong;asIwasoneofthesmallgirls,Ididnotgetachancetolookatittillallhadseenit;but,whentheothersranouttotheplayground,andIwasleftalone,Iwenttothedesk,andtookuptheknife,andopenedandshutalltheblades;butinsteadofleavingtheoneopenwhichIfoundso,Ileftopenanotherblade,justputitontheedgeofmynail,toseehowverysharpitwas,andthenlaiditdown,andranaftertherestofthegirls.

    Whentheschoolmistresscamein,sheimmediatelysawthatwehadtakenupherknife."Someone,"saidshe,"hasbeenusingmyknife;Iamsureofit,becausethebladethatIleftopenisshut,andanotherisopen,anditisgapped;whohasdoneit?"Notagirlspoke;IthoughtthatIwastheonlyonewhohadopenedandshuttheblades,butIknewIhadnotgappedeitherofthem.Iknewthatalltheothershadtakenuptheknife;Iwasafraidtospeak;Ididnotliketotakethewholeblame,andIwassilentastheothergirls

    were.

    Afterwaitingafewminutes,ourteachersaid,"Asnoneofyouchoosetoconfesswhohasdonethis,Ishallhavetopunishtheinnocentwiththeguilty;Ishalltakeawayameritfromallofyou,exceptthosefewgirlswho,Ifeelsure,wouldnotdisobeyme."

    Therewereonlyfivegirlsintheschoolwhodidnotloseamerit,andIwasoneofthenumber.Asshenamedthemover,andgaveherreasonsforbelievingtheminnocent,whenshecametome,shesaid,"LittleSusanVincenthasbeensoorderlyandsogoodeversinceshehasbeenhere,thatIamsureitwasnotshethatdidit,and,ifshehad,Iamsureshewouldconfessit."

    IfeltasifIwaschoking;Iputmyheadcleardownsothatnoonecouldseemyface;butthegirls,whohadnoneofthemseenmetouchtheknife,thoughtthatmymodestymademeappearsomuchconfused;noonebutGodandmyselfknewthatIhadaguiltyconscience.Ifelttoodreadfullytospeakthen;Ithoughtofnothingelseallschooltime;Imissedinallmylessons,forIdidnotattendtoanythingthatwassaidtome.TheschoolmistressthoughtIwassick,andIwenthomemiserableenough.

    AsIwentalong,IthoughtoverallthatMrs.Brownhadsaidtomeaboutconscience,andIunderstoodthenwhatshemeantbythevoiceofGodintheheart.Nooneaccusedme,butIfeltlikeacriminal;

    everyonethoughtwellofme;myschoolmistressandcompanionsalllovedme;butIdespisedandhatedmyself.IfeltasifGodwasdispleasedwithme.

    Asusual,IwentdirectlytoMrs.Browntoaskwhatshehadformetodo."What'sthematter,Susan?"saidshe;"youdon'tlookright;haveyoubeennaughty,orareyousick,child?"

    IcouldnotbeartohaveherspeaksokindlytomewhenIdidnotdeserveit,andIburstintotears;Ilovedherlikeamother,andI

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    toldherall.

    "Andnow,Susan,whatareyougoingtodo?"

    "Iwantyou,ma'am,totelltheschoolmistress."

    "Bettertellheryourself,"sheanswered.

    Afterthinkingawhile,IsaidthatIwould;andthenmyconsciencewasalittleeasier.Iwentalittlebeforethetime,thatImightseeheralone.WhenIcamein,Ifoundafriendofherswithher,andIheardmymistresswhisper,"Thisismydearlittleorphangirl."Shecalledmetoher,andtookmeupinherlap."Well,honestlittleSue,"saidshe,"whydon'tyoulookupinmyface,asyouknowyoualwaysdo?"

    Thiswastoomuchforme;Iburstintotears,andputmyhandsovermyface.

    "What'sthematter,Susan?"saidshe.

    AssoonasIcouldspeak,Isaid,"Ididopentheknife;IwaswickedwhenyouthoughtIwasgood,forIdidnottellthetruth;Iopenedandshutalltheblades,andIcutanotchonmynailwith

    one,andthenIdidnottellyouofitwhenyouaskedwhoopenedit."WhenIhadgotitallout,Ifeltbetter;itseemedasifagreatloadwastakenoffofmyheart.

    Inafewminutes,mykindfriendsaidtome,"Iamsorryyoudidwrong,Susan;butIamverygladtoseethatyouhaveatenderconscience,andthatithasmadeyoucomeandconfessyourfaults;Iamverygladthatyouaresosorry;itisabadsignwhenchildrenthinktheyarehappy,aftertheyhavedonewrong.Itrust,mydearSusan,thatyouhavesufferedsomuch,thatyouwillnevercommitsuchafaultagain;itwasonlyfoolishanddisobedienttotakeupmyknife,butitwasverywrongnottotellme,whenIaskedwhodidit,andletmepunishsomanygirlsforyouroffence."

    IsawthatshethoughtIwastheonlyonethathadtouchedtheknife,andbelievedmeworsethanIwas;andthenIfeltwhatadifferencetherewasbetweenagoodandanevilconscience;foritdidnottroublemehalfsomuchthatshethoughtmeworsethanIreallywas,astoseethatshethoughtmebetter.

    Thenshesaid,"Youmust,Susan,confessbeforethewholeschoolthatitwasyouthattookmyknife."

    Whileshewasspeaking,thegirlscamein.IhadcriedsomuchthatIcouldhardlyspeak;andmygoodfriendsaidthat,asIwasalittlegirl,shewouldspeakforme.

    AssoonasshesaidthatIhadconfessedthatitwasIthattooktheknife,almosteverygirlintheschoolcriedout,"ItwasnotlittleSusan,itwasI!""ItwasnotSue,itwasI!"washeardallroundtheroom.Thismademefeelboldenoughtospeak,andIsaid,

    "Yes,Ididtakeitupwhenyouwerealloutontheplayground;Iopenedandshutalltheblades,andcutalittlenotchonmynail."

    "AndsodidI!""AndsodidI!"washeardfromanumberofvoices.

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    "Andwetookitupfirst,"saidallthegirls.

    Whentherewassilence,theschoolmistresstoldusthatshewasgladtoseethat,thoughwehaddonewronginthemorning,weweretryingnowtodoright,andrepairourfault;thatalthoughwehadnotobeyedconsciencethen,wewereactingasitdirectedusnow.

    "Andareyounotallhappier?"saidshe."Yes,"theyallsaid."AndisnotGodgood,toputthisfeelinginyourhearts,thatmakesyouunhappywhenyoudowrong,andhappywhenyoudoright?Followthisguide,children,anditwillleadyoutoheaven."

    Itmayseemstrangethatachild,hardlynineyearsold,shouldrememberallthatwassaidatsuchatime;butIsufferedagreatdealbeforeIconfessedmyfault,forIwasalittleproudofmygoodcharacteratschool,andmysufferingmademeremember.Besides,Mrs.Brownoftentalkedaboutconsciencetome,andtoldmethatImustlearntogovernmyself,forthatwhenshedied,Ishouldhavenothingbutmycharactertodependupon;noguidebutmyBibleandmyconscience,andnoprotectorbutGod.

    WhenIwasaboutfifteenyearsold,Mrs.Brown,mykindfriend,died,gosweetlyandcalmlythatdeathinherseemedbeautiful.Isatbyherside,afterIhadclosedhereyes,andlookedinherdear

    face,tillevenmygriefatlosingherwasquieted,andtillIfeltwhatwelearninthegoodbook,thatthegoodneverdie.IfeltsurethathersoulwaswithGod.

    Afterthefuneral,Iwentouttoinquireforaplace,andsoonfoundone,foreveryoneknewMrs.Brown'sregardforme.

    Imetwithagreattroubleatmyfirstplace;Iwasthechambermaid,andthenurserymaidwasenviousofme,becausemymistresslikedmebetterthanher.SheoftenaccusedmeoffaultsIdidnotcommit;but,whenmymistressspoketome,Ilookedandwassoinnocentthatshewasconvinced.

    Onemorningmymistresssentforme;assoonasIsawherfaceIknewthatsomethingverybadwasthematter,forthetearscameintohereyeswhenshespoketome.Shetoldmethatshewasverysorry,butthatshecouldnotkeepmeanylonger;shewasgrievedtoloseme,butmoreforthecause.

    Iaskedhertotellmethecause.

    "Iamafraid,"shesaid,"indeed,Susan,Ihaveagoodreasontobelieve,thatyouarenothonest."

    Idoconfess,ladies,thatIwasveryangry;itseemedasifallthebloodinmybodyflewupintomyfaceandhead;Icouldnotspeak,

    andIdon'tknowbutmyconfusionandangertogethermademelookguilty.

    "Iamglad,"saidshe,"thatyoudon'ttellanyfalsehoodaboutit;youarewelcometostayheretillyougetaplace."

    BythistimeIcouldspeak,andIsaidtoher,"Iamasinnocentasthechildjustborn.Inevertooksomuchasapinfromanyone;Idonotwishtostayaminuteinyourhouse;Iwouldnotstayinanyone'shousewhohadaccusedmeofdishonesty;"andIcalleduponmy

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    motherandmyfriendMrs.Brown,thoughIknewtheycouldnotanswerme,andIcriedaloudlikeachild.

    Mymistressshedtears,andsaidsheshouldnothaveaccusedmewithoutcertainproofsofmydishonesty,andbeggedmetoconfessmyfault,andtostaytillIgotaplace;butItoldherIwouldnotstayanotherminute,andIwenttomychamberandtiedupmybundle,andputonmybonnetandshawl,andwalkedstraightoffwithoutspeakingtoanyone.

    IhadgonenearlyamilebeforeIwasatallcalmed,andthen,outofbreath,andmiserablebeyondwordstotell,Isatdownunderanoldtreebytheroadside.Itwasautumn;thetreewasstrippedofitsleaves,thewindsoundedmournfullyamongthedeadbranches,therewereheavydarkcloudsinthesky,andmyheartwasheavieranddarkerthantheclouds,andmysighsweresadderthanthewind.

    TheplacewhereIhadbeenlivingwastwomilesfromthevillagewhereIhadlivedwithMrs.Brown,andIhadtakentheroadtoit,thoughthenshewasnottheretotakemein;Ihadnorelationinthewideworld;O,Inevershallforgetthatdrearymoment,andhowdesolateIfelt.Ilookedupintothesky,andcalleduponGod,theFatherofthefatherless;Icriedtohimforhelp,andhelpcametome,forIfeltstrongerandIgrewcomposed;andthenIrememberedI

    wasinnocent,andjustthenthesunbrokeoutbetweentwodarkclouds,anditlookedtomelikethepurebrighteyeofGod,lookingrightintomyheart,andseeingmyinnocence;andthenitseemedasifmysoulwasfulloflight,andIwentonmywaytothevillage,feelingasifIhadnodreadfulsorrow.

    WhenIgotintothevillage,Irememberedmyoldschoolmistress,andIknewthat,thoughshewaspoorherself,shewouldshareherbedwithmeforanightatleast,andIrememberedthatscripture,"Benotanxiousforthemorrow."

    ItwasduskwhenIknockedatherdoor;andO,youknownot,whohaveneverbeenwithoutahappyhome,howcheeringtomyheartwas

    thesoundofherkindvoice,saying,"Walkin."Shewasnotveryquicksighted,andatfirstshetookmeforastranger,tillIsaid,"ItisI,MissHowe;doyounotknowme?"Sheturnedmetowardsthelightthatwasstillleftinthewest,andinasecondexclaimed,"Why,itislittleSue,myorphangirl!"Thiswastoomuchforme.Sheputherarmsroundme,andIcriedagainlikeachild;buttheywerenotsuchbittertearsasIhadshedbefore.

    "Whatbroughtyouhereatthistime?"saidshe,"andwhatisthematter?Butcometakesomesupperfirst,andtellmeafterwards;youlookverytired."Shetookoffmybonnet,andmademesitdownbythefire,andfinishedgettingherteareadywhichshewaspreparingwhenIcamein,andmademedrinkacupofitbeforesheasked

    anotherquestion,andthenshesaid,"Now,Susan,tellmewhatisthematter;somethinghashappened,Iknow."ThenItoldherallthatIknewmyself,forwhymymistresshadtreatedmesoIcouldnottell.

    WhenIhadfinished,shesaid,"Now,Susan,youwillfindtheadvantageofagoodcharacter;ifIdidnotbelievethatyouwouldstarvesoonerthanstealortellafalsehood,Ishouldbeafraidaboutyounow;butasitis,Idonotfeeluneasy,forIbelievethatinnocencealwaysprevails.IwilldothebestIcanforyou;I

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    shallneverforgetthepenknife;so,mychild,donotcryanymore,andletustalkofotherthings;youshallhavehalfofmybedandwhateverIhave,tillyoucangetaplacetosuityou;so,dear,donotbedowncast."

    O,youngladies,youmustknowwhatitistobealoneintheworld,andtobeaccusedwrongfully,tobeabletoknowtheblessingofkindness,oftrueChristiancharity;itseemedasifavoicehadsaidtomytroubledheart,"Peace,bestill."

    Directlyafterbreakfastthenextmorning,MissHoweleftme;shesaidshewasgoingtotakeashortwalkbeforeschoolbegan,andshouldsoonreturn.Shelookedmuchpleasedwhenshecameback."Ithink,"saidshe,"Ihavegotagoodplaceforyou.Itisattheminister's;Iheardtheywantedsomeone;Iwentandtoldthemallaboutyou,andtheybelieveyouareinnocent.Mr.A--saysheremembersyouinMrs.Brown'ssickchamber,buthiswifethinksitpropertogoandseetheladyyouhavebeenlivingwith,andhewillcomeandseeyouthisevening."

    Atfirstthismademefeelverybadly;myprideandmyangerbegantorise,butafterawhileIconqueredthem.Irememberedthatnoonecouldtakeawaymygoodconscience,andIcouldnotthinkthatIshouldbeforsaken.

    Ipassedthedayverycomfortably,andevencheerfully;IsometimesforgotthatIhadanytrouble.Justaftertea,theministercamein;heshookhandsverykindlywithme,buthelookedveryserious,andfixedhiseyerightinmyface.

    O,ifIhadnothadagoodconsciencethen,howcouldIhavebornethatlook!butitseemedtomeasifIcouldfeelmysoulcomingupintomyface,totellitsowninnocence;Iamsuremylooksmusthavesaid,Iamnotafraid,forIhavedonenowrong.

    Heseemedmoresatisfied,buthetoldmethathehadbeentoMrs.--,whereIhadlived,andshehadtoldhimthattheevidencewasso

    greatofmydishonestythatshecouldnotdoubtit.Shewasonlysorryforme.

    "Wehavedetermined,"saidhe,"totryyou;Icannotbuthopethatyouarewhatyouseem,innocent;buttimewillshow."

    Ihadfeltsoproudofmycharacter,thattheideaofgoingupontrialwashardformetobear,andIjustansweredthatIwouldgo;IwasnotasgratefulasperhapsIoughttohavebeen,foritwasverygoodinhimtobelievemeinnocent,inspiteofallthatwastoldhimagainstme,andIoughttohavethankedhimforhiscompassionuponsuchaforlorncreatureasIwasthen.

    Manyyearsafter,IfoundoutwhatIhadbeenaccusedof,andIhadthesatisfactionofhavingmyinnocenceacknowledged.ThemorningofthedaywhenIleftmymistress,shehadreceivedsomemoneyingold.Shehadcountedallthepiecesoververycarefully,andwasaboutputtingthemaway,whenshewascalledsuddenlyoutoftheroomtoseeafriendatthedooruponimportantbusiness.Itwascold,andshecalledme,andsentmeintotheroomforhershawl,whereIneverevensawthegold.

    Herbrother,whohadcomewithherfriend,ranintotheroomtowarm

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    himselfwhiletheyweretalking;hesawthegold,and,toteasehissister,putoneoftheeaglesintohispocketmeaningtoreturnitthesameday.

    Hewasinamerchant'scountinghouse,andthatverydaywassentoutoftownuponimportantbusiness,atonlyaminute'swarning.Hewasacarelessfellow,andforgothisjest,anddidnotlearntilllongafterwardsitssadconsequences.

    Mymistress,whoknewthatnoonehadenteredtheroombutherbrotherandI,andwascertainofheraccuracyincountingthemoney,wasconvincedthatIwasathief.Shehadbelievedsomeill-naturedthingstheotherservant,whodislikedme,hadsaidagainstme,andhadbecomereadytothinkillofme.When,longafter,thisladyfoundoutherinjustice,shetookpainstodeclaremyinnocenceandtoaskmyforgiveness.Butladiesshouldbecarefulnottoaccusepoorgirlswrongfully,andnottoleavemoneyabout.Terribleruinmayfollowsuchcarelessness.

    AfterIhadlivedfiveyearsattheminister's,Imarriedacarpenter,agoodman,whommyfriendsallliked;and,thoughIwasalmostbrokenheartedatleavingmyhappyhome,Iwaswillingtogiveupallforhim.

    Andthennewtroublesandtrialsbegan.Myhusbandwasnotverysuccessfulatfirst,butItookinsewing,andwegotalong;welovedeachother,andwereveryhappy.Butaboutayearandahalfafterourmarriage,hehadafallfromahouse,andinjuredhisspine,andafterasicknessofthreemonthshedied.

    Atthetimehewasbroughthomesodreadfullyhurt,Ihadaninfantsixweeksold;Iwasnotverystrong,andnursingmyhusband,andthecareofmyinfant,andmydistressathisdeath,alltogether,weretoomuchforme;Ihadasevereillness.Thedoctor,whowasaverykindman,tookcareofmeandsentmeanurse,whotendedmethroughtheworstofmyillness,anddidnotleavemetillIwasabletocrawlabout,andhelpmyselfandtakecareofmypoorbaby,

    whohadbeensadlyneglected;forIwassosickthatIrequiredallthenurse'sattention;andnowcamemyhardesttrial.

    OnenightinDecember,aboutthreemonthsaftermyhusband'sdeath,Iwassittingovermylittlefirelateintheevening,readingmyBible,inhopesthatthosewordsofcomfortmightquietmygrief,whenIwasstartledbyaknockatthedoor,andmylandlordentered.Helivedintheotherpartofthehouseinwhichherentedmeoneroom;Ineverlikedthisman,andatfirstIfeltfrightened,butinaminuteIgotoverit.

    "Iwanttherent,"hesaid.

    "Butyouknow,"Isaid,"allmytroubles,andthatmypoorhusbandleftnothing,thatIhavebeensick,andthatIhavenomoney;Ishallsoonbeabletoearnenoughtopayyou,ifyouwillonlytakepityonmeandwaittillIcan."

    "Well,"saidhe,"onegoodturndeservesanother;perhapsI'llaccommodateyouifyouwilldosomethingforme."

    "IfitisanythingIcando,"Isaid,"Ishouldbegladtodoit,andverythankfultoyouforyourkindnessinwaitingfortherent."

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    Hewentintotheotherroomandbroughtinalargebundleoflacesandsilksandothervaluablegoods."Iwantyou,"saidhe,"toopenyourfeatherbedandputallthesethingsintoit;theyarerightlymine,butIhavemyreasonsforwishingtohidethem;somegoodshavebeenstolen,andtheconstablesareafterthem,andiftheyweretoseethesetheymightseizetheminsteadofthosetheyaresearchingfor,anditwouldmakeagreatbother."

    Ihadnodoubttheywerestolengoods,andIsaidimmediatelythatIwouldnotdowhathewishedmeto,butascivillyasIcould.

    "Iwill,"saidhe,"giveyouoneofthepiecesofcambricforyourtrouble,andIwillneveraskyouforthislastquarter'srent;itwillbeagreatfavortome,fortheyknowthatyouaresick,andyouhavethecreditofbeingveryhonest,andthethingswouldnotbetouchedinyourbed,andagreatdealoftroublewouldbesaved."

    "Iwill,"saidI,"keepthecreditofbeinghonest;Icanhavenothingtodowithanyofthesethings;yourconsciencecanbesttellwhethertheyarehonestlycomeby."

    "Doyoudare,"saidhe,"tosayIstolethem?"insuchaloudvoiceastowakeupmypoorbabyandtomakemestart.

    "Isaynothing,"Ianswered,"butthatitisagainstmyconsciencetodowhatyouaskedmetodo."

    Heflewintoapassion,andsaid,"Conscienceornoconscience,youdoasIaskyouto,oroutofmyhouseyougothisverynight."

    "Notto-night,"Isaid.

    "Yes,to-night,"heanswered."DoasItellyou,andyouhavenorenttopay,andthispieceofcambricisyours,andIamyourfriend;butrefuseme,andoutofthehouseyougothisverynight;Ihavewarnedyoulongenoughtopaytherent."

    ItoldhimthatIcouldnotdowhatwasagainstmyconscienceforallthegoodsofthisworld,andthatifhewassocruelastoturnmeoutofdoors,Godwouldprotectmeandmychild."But,"saidI,"areyounotafraidtodosuchawickedthing,itissodarkandstormy,andmypoorbaby"--andatthethoughtthatithadnofathertoprotectit,Iburstintotears,andcouldnotspeak.

    Hewassilent,andseemedtofeelsomepity.Presentlyhesaid,"Well,youmaystaytilldaylight,butthenyoumusteitherhidethesethingsforme,oryoumustmarch.AndIsupposeitwillnotworryyourstomachtoletthesethingsstayheretillthen."Soheputthegoodsonachair,andlaidmycloakandbonnetuponthem.

    Assoonashewasgone,andhisdoorshut,Itookthethingsandputthemalljustoutsideofthedoor.Iwastoomuchtroubledandfrightenedtogotobed.Atbreakofdayhewasinmyroomagain."WillyoudoasIdesire,"saidhe,"orwillyouclearout?I'llmakeyoupayforputtingthesethingsonthedirtyfloor."Hestoppedaminute."Come,now,hidethesethings,andwearefriends,andnotroubleaboutyourrent,andall'sright,youknow."

    IthankheaventhatIneverhesitated;itdidnotseemapossible

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    enoughtohishouse,andgotmethislittleroomintheneighborhood,whereIhavetakeninsewingwork,andhaveeversincegotaverygoodliving.

    WhenIinquiredaboutmylandlord,Ifoundthattheofficerscamethatmorning,foundthestolengoods,andcarriedhimtoprison.Myfriendwenttoseehim,andtoldhimfrommethatassoonasIcouldearnthemoney,IwouldpayhimwhatIowedhim.ThisIdidwiththeveryfirstmoneyIreceived.Iwenttoseehim,andtooktherenttohimmyself.Hedidnotknowme,thestoophadchangedmesomuch.

    Certainly,ladies,sheadded,Ihavemetwithwhatarecalledgreatmisfortunes;IhavelostallthatIlovedbestonearth,andIamacrippleforlife;butIstillrejoicetothinkthatmymother'sprayerhasbeenheardforme;throughtheblessingofGodIhavebeensavedfromtheevilthatthereisintheworld,forIhaveeverhadthetestimonyofagoodconscience.

    Thesunwassettingbeforetheoldladyhadfinishedherstory;itsslantingbeamsstreamedinthroughthenarrowwindow,andfellonthegraylocksthatwerepartedneatlyonherforehead,andonherbright,calm,upliftedeye,andgaveaglowofyouthfulenthusiasmandcelestialbrightnesstoherface.

    EndofTheProjectGutenbergEtextofConscience,byElizaLeeFollen