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Interpersonal
Photo by Zeiss Microscopy [link]
Dynamics
Ed BatistaClass 9: FROM THE LAB TO THE REAL WORLD
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Here until 5:50pmClose support triosWork in small groupsA short breakAlumni join your groupsYour final T-group tonight
Today’s agenda
Photo by Theresa Thompson [link]
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Photo by Martin Meredith [link]
Vulnerabilityhangover
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VulnerabilityhangoverThe morning after the [2010 TED] talk, I woke up with one of the worst vulnerability hangovers of my life… What did I do? 500 people officially think I’m crazy & it totally sucks.
~Brené Brown
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VulnerabilityhangoverA feature, not a bug
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If that’s nottherapy, what is it?
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Comfort withdiscomfortDisclosures aren’t intended to heal or solveGreater capacity to share & witness Very real-world issue
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Discuss with your
How you helpedWhat I’m thankful forWhat I learned about support
support group
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DebriefWhat did you learn?How might this apply in the real world?
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Thank your group
Photo by John Martinez Pavliga [link]
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But is this real?
Photo by Zeiss Microscopy [link]
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But is this real?Yes & no
Intensively-designed experienceBut ALL experiences are shaped by the setting
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But is this real?The purpose is NOT to replicate T-groups
in lifeBut to understand foundational principles& translate them into other cultures
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Vulnerability
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Performance &
Stress
Performance
Eustress Distress
stress
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Safety, trust,
Photo by Carly Lesser & Art Drauglis [link]
intimacy
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CONTEXT Learning,
Awareness,& Behavioral
Change
Experimentation,Risk-Taking,
& Vulnerability
Safety, Trust, Intimacy
Initial Conditions
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Social identityContinuum of social behavior IntergroupInterpersonal
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It’s usually both
Photo by Anne Worner [link]
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FeedbackStressfulConfusingUnwelcome
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It’s not like this…
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It’s like this
Photo by Unknown. Concept by Kevin Martin.
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3 triggers
Photo by Wendy [link]
TruthRelationshipIdentity
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The netMe You
Yourrespons
e
Mybehavi
orMyintention
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5 levels1: Ritual2: Extended Ritual3: Content4: Feelings About Content
5: Feelings About Each Other
Photo by Rita Willaert [link]
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Emotions areattention magnets
Photo by Garrett Mace [link]
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A soft start
Photo by Oakley Originals [link]
Like this
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Begin with authentic positive intentEmphasize mutual goals
A soft start
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Connections
Photo by Hadley Paul Garland [link]
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ConnectionsA bid can be a question, a gesture, a look, a touch—any single expression that says, “I want to feel connected to you.”
~John Gottman
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StatusCertaintyAutonomyRelatednessFairness
SCARF model
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Stereotype threat
Photo by Renato Ganoza
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Microaggressions
Photo by Igor Spasic [link]
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The balcony &
Photo by Richard Leeming [link]
the dance floor
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Dissecting a
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group
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EQ and groupsEssential conditions…Mutual trustGroup identity (Feeling of belonging)Group efficacy (Belief in value of the team)Strongly affected by group EQ
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EQ and groupsHigh EQ individuals ≠ High EQ groupGroup norms determine group EQCreate awareness of emotionHelp regulate emotion
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EQ and groups
Photo by Wilhelm Joys Anderson [link]
Ability to identify productivenorms & make them explicit
Norms regarding emotionawareness & regulation
Mutual trust,group identity, group
efficacy
Participation, cooperation, collaboration
Effectiveness
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Kantor’s 4 players
Photo by Thomas Galvez [link]
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Kantor’s 4 playersMover initiates
Follower supportsOpposer challengesBystander observes
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Kantor’s 4 playersOptimal system
All roles are representedAll members can play all roles at any time
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Kantor’s 4 playersSub-optimal system
One or more roles is missingMembers may avoid certain rolesMembers may get stuck in certain roles
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Pfeffer & Cuddy
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CuddyInfluence = warmth + strength(Establish warmth first)
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…and Top Quartile in Leadership
Effectiveness
Bottom Quartile in Likeability…
1 in 2000
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PfefferAmbitionEnergyFocusSelf-knowledgeConfidenceEmpathy for othersCapacity to tolerate conflict
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What is support?
Photo by Peter Dutton [link] Photo by Resolute Support Media [link] Photo by Drew [link]
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Consciousness
Competence
1
2 3
4
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Act
Reflect
Conceptualize
PlanPrepare & develop a
future course of action.
Identify principles that help explain the results & update old theories.
Assess my behavior & its consequences.
Experientiallearning
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Discuss (Part 1)What have we learned?
How will we apply it in the real world?
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Discuss (Part 2)What questions do we have for our
alumni?
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Photo by Luz Adriana Villa [link]
Take a break
10 minutes
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Photo by Luz Adriana Villa [link]
How this will workOne of our guests will join your group
You’ll have 13 minutes with themThen they’ll rotate aroundPlease stay on time
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Photo by Luz Adriana Villa [link]
DebriefWhat did you learn?What questions remain?What concerns do you have?
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Next stepsWeek 9 Post-Group Assignment due Thurs @ NoonThis is your final written assignmentPlease thank your Reading Coach
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Next stepsWeek 10 Readings & Class Notes on CanvasWeek 10 Pre-Class Assignment due Tues @ 3pmFinal feedback prep, nothing to submitSingle most important task
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Final feedbackSame format as end of LeadLabsSeries of 1:1 conversationsA lot of work to prepareStart early
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Final feedbackA suggested formatHere’s what I’ve appreciated about you…
& here’s what I hope for you…If this doesn’t work for you, use another format
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Final feedbackNotes can helpBut don’t just read themThe experience makes a differenceThis isn’t the time to drop a bombshell
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Dynamics InterpersonalFor more:www.edbatista.com/interpersonal-dynamics.html