Drafting: Writing the Body of Your Paper

Introduction

Creating unity in your writing

Giving your writing coherence

Direct references

Transitional expressions

Elaborating on your ideas

Sensory details

Facts and statistics

Examples and anecdotes

Expert opinions

Introduction

A team can’t succeed unless all of its players do their part—they need to support the rest of the team and develop their skills.

The parts of a composition should function together in a similar way.

Introduction

Writing the body of a composition is more than pouring ideas from your head onto paper. You must present a complete, well conceived set of ideas that work together to communicate a point. To do that, pay attention to these qualities of good writing:

3. Elaboration—each idea is fully developed

2. Coherence—the ideas are strongly connected

1. Unity—all parts work to support the main idea

Creating unity in your writing

Your writing has unity if all of its parts work together to support your main idea.

All of the details in a paragraph should support the paragraph’s main idea, and all of the paragraphs in a paper should work together to support the paper’s main idea, or thesis.

Creating unity in your writing

Shane wrote the following paragraph as part of a paper on coral reefs.

When he reread his paragraph, he discovered that it lacked unity.

Coral reefs cover less than 1% of Earth’s surface. Coral reefs provide a habitat for more than 25% of the ocean’s species. Corals are small, spineless animals like jellyfish. Jellyfish live on coral reefs, too.

does not support main idea

limestone skeleton for new corals to grow on.

Corals produce calcium

carbonate, or limestone, to form their hard outer skeleton.When corals die, they leave behind their

Giving your writing coherence

Ideas within a piece of writing must be connected. That connectedness is called coherence.

You can create coherence in your work by usingdirect references and transitional expressions.

Introduced plant species can be harmful to the environment. They can crowd out native species.

Giving your writing coherence Direct references

One way to create coherence within a paragraph is to make a direct reference to a key word or idea that came immediately before. You can

• use pronouns to refer to nouns used earlier

• repeat key words and phrasesTry to use native plants in your garden. These plants are easier to grow than introduced species.Try to use native plants in your garden. These plants are easier to grow than introduced species.

Introduced plant species can be harmful to the environment. They can crowd out native species.

Giving your writing coherence Direct references

• use synonyms or rewordings of key words and ideas

Introduced plant species are called “invasive” if they cause environmental harm. These invasive species are often unintentionally brought into an environment.

Introduced plant species are called “invasive” if they cause environmental harm. These invasive species are often unintentionally brought into an environment.

because, since, so that, therefore, thus

Showing cause and effect

first, last, mainly, to begin withShowing importance

in, on, above, here, thereShowing place

after, then, next, first, meanwhileShowing time

still, but, in spite of, however, yetContrasting ideas

also, and, another, similarlyComparing ideas

Transitional expressions connect ideas and make relationships between ideas clear. Here are some common transitional expressions:

Giving your writing coherence Transitional expressions

Giving your writing coherence

Notice how Shane achieved coherence within this paragraph by adding direct references and transitional expressions.

Coral reefs cover less than 1% of Earth’s surface. In spite of this, they provide a habitat for more than 25% of the ocean’s species. Corals are small, spineless animals like jellyfish. Corals produce calcium carbonate, or limestone, to form their hard outer skeleton. Corals leave behind their limestone skeleton after they die, so that new corals have a foundation to grow on.

uses pronoun

contrasts ideas

repeats key word

uses pronoun

shows time

shows cause and effect

Elaborating on your ideas

In writing, elaboration develops main ideas within the body paragraphs to form a complete work.

Each paragraph should have a clear main idea developed with elaboration, such as

• sensory details

• facts and statistics

• examples

• anecdotes

• expert opinions

Elaborating on your ideas Sensory details

Sensory details appeal to the five senses—sight, hearing, taste, touch, and smell.

Lainey took the stage before the packed auditorium. Her outrageously pink hair and dark denim outfit perfectly accentuated the intense pitch of her voice and the pounding beat of the drums.

Elaborating on your ideas Facts and statistics

Facts are statements that can be proved true.

Statistics are facts expressed as numbers.

The performer, originally from a small town in Kansas, moved to New York City with her mother as manager and her father as booking agent.

Lainey’s benefit concert filled the five thousand–seat arena and raised over $300,000 for local charities.

Examples are specific instances, or illustrations, of a general idea.

Elaborating on your ideas Examples and anecdotes

Lainey played all the old favorites, such as “Bridge of Strength” and “Street Corner Serenade,” plus a few new songs, including “Violet Ocean” and “Love for You.”

Anecdotes are brief personal stories used to illustrate an idea.

Lainey has a deep love of animals. Following a performance last year, she found a stray cat near her tour bus. She adopted the animal, and it now lives with her both at home and on tour.

Elaborating on your ideas Expert opinions

Expert opinions are statements made by reliable authorities on a given subject.

Don’t let Lainey’s shocking appearance fool you; She is a very talented singer. Dr. Gail Garcia, professor of music education at the local university, says that Lainey’s sense of rhythm and harmony is flawless.

Elaborating on your ideas

Here is a paragraph from Shane’s essay. What types of elaboration did he use?

Coral reefs support one of Earth’s most biologically diverse ecosystems. However, an estimated 20% of the world’s reefs have already been destroyed, with no hope of recovery. Global climate change and human activities such as coastal development, overfishing, and pollution have put the future of coral reefs at risk. In the Status of Coral Reefs of the World: 2004, Clive Wilkinson notes that global climate change has been the major threat to coral reefs over the past decade.

statistic

expert opinion

example

main idea

Your Turn 2: Elaborate on ideas

Consider a subject you know well and write down a topic sentence for a paragraph on that subject. Then, choose three different types of elaboration from the list below and create elaboration to support the topic sentence. We will use Motocross as an example.

Types of elaboration:• sensory details• facts and statistics• examples• anecdotes• expert opinions