ebook - an introduction to selling by giving

8/6/2019 eBook - An Introduction to Selling by Giving

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How To Give Your WayTo A Soul-CenteredSix-Figure Practice

Your Practice Can Provide Both Money and Meaning

This Course Will Teach You How

bySELLINGGIVING

BRIAN WHETTEN, Ph.D, M.A.

An Introduction to


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2006, 2008 Brian Whetten, Ph.D., M.A. www.sixfigurepractice.net

Core CoachingGetting To The Heart Of The Matter

Welcome!Thank you for purchasing An Introduction to Selling By Giving. This program comes with the

following pieces.

CD 1: Integrating Spirituality and Business. This program explains why we

naturally encounter so many conflicts and challenges when we try to bring together love

and money. It describes the key discovery that allows us to resolve these conflicts and

create businesses that provide both money and meaning. It explains the 3 Keys to

Integrating Spirituality and Business, and it details the radical benefits that come from

doing so. If you have any conflicts in your life around money, sales, or charging for your

services, this CD is for you.

CD 2: Creating the System for Your Soul-Centered, Six-Figure Practice.

Where the first CD is applicable to many types of business, this second CD is specificallyfor soul-centered practice builders purpose-driven people who are committed to making

a living by offering individualized services to others, such as coaches, therapists, healers,

consultants, etc. It explains the critical importance of creating a system for your business.

And it begins the process of helping you construct such a system, by walking through the

9 Fatal Business Mistakes and the 6 Essential Elements of a Soul-Centered, Six-Figure

Practice.

This E-book. This E-book comes in two parts. The first section consists of a set of

handouts. Please print out these handouts and use them as you listen to the CDs. The

second section consists ofthree chapters that both summarize and expand on the content

in the two CDs.

Weekly E-Coaching. Once you have the how-to, do you have the want-to? If you

havent done so already, please feel free to register your email address at

www.sixfigurepractice.net/ebook, in order to claim your subscription to this weekly

support structure, which will help you as you take what you are learning and put it in to

action.

This introduction is a powerful, stand-alone program. You dont need to purchase anything else

in order to receive exceptional value from it. And at the same time, it also serves as the first

module in the full Selling By Giving: How to Give Your Way to a Soul-Centered, Six-Figure

Practice course.

If you receive exceptional value from this program, and would like to learn more about whether

or not you could receive exceptional value from the full course, please feel free to visit

www.sixfigurepractice.net.

Welcome!


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2006, 2008 Brian Whetten, Ph.D., M.A. 1 www.sixfigurepractice.net


CD 1: Integrating Spirituality and Business

1. Introduction 2:482. Who Are You? 8:403. What You Can Receive From This Program 4:254. Centering 2:545. Exercise: Selling Your Services 2:186. Three Core Limiting Beliefs 7:217. Two Different Value Systems 14:018. The Secret to Spiritual Business 3:389. Key 1: Provide Exceptional Value 4:3810.Key 2: Adopt a Learning Orientation to Life 11:4311.Key 3: Only Connect 5:0212.Additional Benefits of Selling By Giving 11:53

Total Running Time 79:14

CD 2: Creating the System for YourSoul-Centered, Six-Figure Practice

1. Introduction 4:272. Exercise: Practice Building Quiz 3:30

3. Fatal Business Mistakes 1-3 8:104. Fatal Business Mistakes 4-6 11:305. Fatal Business Mistakes 7-9 8:376. Practice Building Keys 9:197. Element 1: Purpose 8:138. Element 2: Value 6:419. Element 3: Profit 1:1310.Element 4: Web of Trust Marketing 8:0711.Element 5: Value Based Enrollment 3:4612.Element 6: Co-Creative Positioning 5:46

Total Running Time 79:14

PLEASE NOTE: Some older CD players will not play CDs that are more than 74minutes long. If a CD does not play correctly, please try a different player.


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Handouts: Integrating Spirituality and Business

Exercise: Selling Your Services

Imagine that you are going to spend the rest of the week doing nothing but selling yourself

and your services. What comes up for you? Are there any fears? Negative thoughts?

Self-judgments?

Selling my services means

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

What about making money and being rich?

If I got rich selling my services, it would mean

1.

2.

3.4.

5.

Are there any limiting beliefs or judgments you have about business? Or what it takes to

be successful in business?

Rich business people are

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.


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Three Core Limiting Beliefs

The three core limiting beliefs that most often create resistance to selling our services are:

1. Selling means _____________

2. Im afraid that Im not _________ ______________

3. Its not okay to ___________ for my _______________

Two Value Systems

Love is based on Business is based on

__________________ and ___________________ and

__________________ ___________________


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The Three Keys for Integrating Spirituality and Business

1. Provide ________________ ___________________

2. Adopt a _______________ Orientation to Life

3. Only ______________

This translates the ethics of ___________, ___________ and loving ____________ into

the language of business.


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Handouts: The 9 Fatal Business Mistakes

Practice Building QuizThink up and write down the following figures for your practice or business. If you arent yetbuilding your practice, think up some numbers that would seem reasonable for you to be making,after 6-12 months of practice building.

$__________ Quarterly Revenue. How much gross income did you make last quarter?

$__________ Hours Per Week. On average, how many hours a week did you work onactivities related to your practice?

___________ Number of Clients. How many clients did you service in the last quarter?

$__________ Investment Pool. How much money, not including credit card debt or hopefulincome, do you have set aside for investment in your practice over the next year?

$__________ Monthly Expenses. How much are you spending per month, on average on bothyour living expenses and your practice building?

Great! Now for the quiz. Please answer yes or no to each of the following.

1. Yes No Do the following quick exercise, and then count the number of check marks. Did youcheck less than 5?

Make a check by each of the following beliefs that resonate with you. If even a part of youagrees with an item, check it.

_____ Business has to be a cut-throat battle for survival

_____ To get ahead in business, you have to step on others

_____ Big businesses are greedy and just want to take my money

_____ Nothing matters in business except the bottom line

_____ To be a successful business person, Id have to give up being a healer or an artist

_____ Those who are successful in business lied and cheated their way to the top_____ Business makes the rich richer, and the poor poorer

_____ I cant be successful at business without compromising my integrity

_____ Business is a zero-sum, win-lose game

_____ Business is inherently non-spiritual and non-loving


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2. Yes No Are you aware of the 10% of tasks that will generate 90% of your success, and are youfocusing the majority of your efforts on this magic 10%?

3. Yes No When you think about your practice, does your heart sing for joy? Does it also meet yourneeds forcontribution and growth? (Check yes if you answered yes to both)

4. Yes No Do you regularly get feedback from your clients, regarding the value they received? Dothey consistently report that your service is providing exceptional value? (Check yes ifyou answered yes to both)

5. Yes No Take yourQuarterly Revenue, divide it by Hours Per Week, and divide this by 13. Thisis your real hourly rate. Is it larger than $50?

Quarterly Revenue / Hours Per Week / 13 = __________

6.

Yes

No Take yourQuarterly Revenue, multiple this by four, and add it to the Investment Pool.Now divide this figure by yourMonthly Expenses. Is this larger than 12?

(Quarterly Revenue * 4 + Investment Pool) / Monthly Expenses = __________

7. Yes No Do you have a specific, multi-stage process for sales and marketing, and do you knowwhich stage is currently the "bottleneck" for your enrollment process?

8. Yes No Do you sometimes feel resistance to selling your services, because it feels distasteful or

scary, or because you fear that sales means manipulating and taking from others?

9. Yes No Are you comfortable describing your practice to someone else in terms of who youcompete with, and why you're able to offer even more exceptional value than thesecompetitors to some specific set of clients?

10. Yes No Take the Quarterly Revenue, multiply this by four, and then divide it by Number ofClients. This is your revenue per client. Is this number bigger than $1000?

Quarterly Revenue * 4 / Number of Clients = __________

Great! Now count how many No answers you have from the first 9 questions. ___________This is a rough guess for how many of the 9 Major Learning Opportunities you could look at, asways to dramatically improve your practices success and fulfillment.

The 9 Fatal Business Mistakes are listed on the next page. Each No answer on questions 1-9

corresponds to the same numbered mistake/opportunity on the next page. For example, if youanswered No to question 4, then Mistake number 4 is a great potential leverage point for youto look at. Question 10 is a secondary indicator for mistake number 5.


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The 9 Fatal Business Mistakes

1. Limiting _________

Believing that we cant succeed at business and still be a good person.

2. Poor __________

Inadequate focus on the 10% of our activities that will bring us 90% of our results.

3. Lack of ___________

Using negative motivators to try and shock our way to success.

4. Inadequate _________

Not trusting that our services provide exceptional value.

5. ______ Hourly Rate

Pursuing a business model that wont generate a real hourly rate of at least $50/hour.

6. Inadequate ____________

Desperation for clients caused by insufficient capital.

7. Marketing __________

Not being able to diagnose and fix broken stages in the marketing and sales process.

8. Selling by ____________

Experiencing sales as involving scarcity, fear, taking or manipulation.

9. Extreme ____________

Selecting a target market that is either much too large, or much too small.


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Handouts: The 6 Essential Elements

Building a Practice is Like Baking a CakeImagine that youve never cooked anything before. Youre taken in to the kitchen at afancy restaurant, and told to bake a chocolate cake from scratch. What would be some of

the challenges? What would you need in order to do so with grace and ease?

The fastest, easiest way to create financial ____________ while serving others is by

building a practice that serves individual, ___________ clients.

Four keys to baking a cake (or building a practice)

1. Find a proven ___________

2. Acquire the necessary ___________

3. Learn the relevant ___________

4. Get __________ with any learning opportunities that arise

Typical Practice Building ChallengesWhy dont most people find these keys before building their practices?

Four challenges facing practice builders

1. Standard business doesnt deal with ___________

2. Standard marketing isnt __________

3. Standard advice doesnt focus on the __________ __________

4. Standard training talks about tactics but not ___________


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The Recipe for a Soul-Centered, Six-Figure Practice

What are the six essential ingredients to a soul-centered, six-figure practice?

1. Purpose

What ___________ you and you care deeply about

2. Value

How you provide _________ _________ to your clients

3. Profit

Business models that create ___________ ___________

4. Web of Trust Marketing

Giving away __________ of your exceptional __________

5. Value Based Enrollment

Building trusted relationships by ____________ for your clients __________

6. Co-Creative Positioning

Communities who will consider you _________ or _________ at what you ________

CO-CREATIVE

POSITIONING

Communities Who

Consider You #1 or #2

At What You Do

PURPOSE

What Fulfills You

And You Care

Deeply About

VALUE

How You Offer

Exceptional

Value To

Your Clients

PROFITS

Business Models

That Create

Financial

Abundance

YOUR

BUSINESS

WEB OF TRUST MARKETING

Giving Away Tastes Of

Your Exceptional Value

VALUE BASED ENROLLMENT

Building Trusted Relationships By

Advocating For Your Clients Needs

YOUR CLIENTS

AND CUSTOMERS

CO-CREATIVE

POSITIONING

Communities Who


At What You Do

PURPOSE

What Fulfills You

And You Care

Deeply About

VALUE

How You Offer

Exceptional

Value To

Your Clients

PROFITS

Business Models

That Create

Financial

Abundance

YOUR

BUSINESS













YOUR CLIENTS

AND CUSTOMERS

The 6 Essential Elements of Selling By Giving


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Integrating Spirituality and BusinessIn our society, it often seems like we have to pick either

money or meaning, success or fulfillment, particularly when

it comes to our career. What have you chosen? Are you

following your passion and your purpose but struggling to

make ends meet? Are you making lots of money, but feel

like your life is somehow empty? Read on to learn how you

can have both!

The purpose of the Selling By Giving course is to teach service providers such as coaches,

consultants, therapists, healers, dentists, accountants, financial advisors and more how to build

a practice that lets you have both. If you are self-employed providing a service to others, this

course will show you the essential steps for designing a practice that meets two essential goals.First, it allows you to serve from a place of authentic leadership, and to contribute to the

fulfillment of your essential purpose on this planet it allows you to create a practice that is in

alignment with the meaning of your life. Second, it creates financial abundance for yourself

and others, so you have more power and freedom to manifest whatever it is you want most in life.

So how do you do this? Whether you like it or not, building a practice means building a business

it means being an entrepreneur. In many ways, this is like being a parent you are birthing

something new, which at first is completely dependent on you for food, shelter and loving. You

nurture it, allowing it to grow and develop, and teaching it how to play nice with the other kids

how to work within the rules of the marketplace. Over time,

you let it start to find its own way in the world, while stillproviding it with guidance and support. Eventually, if reared

well, it will become self-supporting, and then get to a place

where its able to support you. Just like raising a child, you

will need patience and wisdom as you nurture it; just like

raising a child, it can only grow so fast. However, unlike conceiving a child, most new

businesses are doomed to failure and early death. Over 95% of new businesses fail within five

years, or else limp along as a continual drain on the founders time, money, and energy. This

document lays out the essential steps to follow to nurture your practice in to a rare gem that

provides both money and meaning, that contributes to your life rather than taking from it, and

that helps fulfill both your physical and your spiritual needs.Does that sound exciting? Frightening? Fun? Well, buckle up were in for a fantastic ride!

Before we go any further on this ride, lets look at some of our core beliefs around business.

Workbook: Make a check by each of the following beliefs that resonate with you. If even a

part of you agrees with an item, check it.

_____ Business has to be a cut-throat battle for survival

Do you feel you have tochoose between moneyand meaning?

Read on to learn how youcan have both!

"Work is love made visible."

Khalil Gibran

The Prophet


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_____ To get ahead in business, you have to step on others

_____ Big businesses are greedy and just want to take my money

_____ Nothing matters in business except the bottom line

_____ To be a successful business person, Id have to give up being a healer or an artist

_____ Those who are successful in business lied and cheated their way to the top

_____ Business makes the rich richer, and the poor poorer

_____ I cant be successful at business without compromising my integrity

_____ Business is a zero-sum, win-lose game

_____ Business is inherently non-spiritual and non-loving

Now, count how many items you checked. This is your I cant succeed at business and stillbe a good person index. The higher this index, the more your subconscious mind will

sabotage your business attempts. Very few practice builders who score higher than a 5 on

this exercise are making at least six-figures a year because they cant let themselves.

In working with practice builders, I have found that most of us are making a set of fundamental,

critical business mistakes any one of which can kill or cripple our practice. These 9 Fatal

Business Mistakes can be easily corrected if we know how. One of the goals of this course is

to explain these mistakes, and help us learn how to fix them and avoid them in the future.

Fatal Business Mistake #1: Believing that we cant succeed at business and still be a

good person.

Foundational Business Milestone #1: Healing our inner conflicts between business and

spirituality.

There are some very common fears and

misconceptions about business. And to be

fair, there are certainly plenty of examples

of unethical, selfish, greedy, lying people

who have rape-and-pillaged their way to the

top. We all know stories of business people

who have cheated the system some

whove gotten caught, and others who

havent. Many people have lost money

because of unethical business acts the dot

com boom and bust, Enron, Worldcom

hundreds of thousands of people lost their jobs or retirement funds in these crises. But just

because some people try to cheat, that doesnt mean that the system is bad, or that you have to

cheat to get ahead. Think back to your exams in school there was plenty of cheating on tests,

"There are those who see the free market as an

enemy. But the market is an invaluable

instrument for human development. Every act

of commerce is an act of mutual service. Even

though it can be motivated by personal

interest, the market system channels that

selfish energy towards assisting others."

Fred Kofman

Business-sattva: The Business Bodhisattva


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but that didnt mean that school was unethical. And if you think about those students who kept

trying to find shortcuts to success, at some point everyone comes up against a situation they cant

cheat at, where it really counts a day of reckoning, where we find that we reap what we sow.Similarly, the fact that these business scandals are just that scandals shows that while it may

take some time, the system of business eventually tends to enforce the natural consequences that

come from trying to play outside the rules. When I started my career as an entrepreneur, I too

carried many of these fears and limiting beliefs, and had a lot of judgments about the ethics of

business people but these quickly crumbled in the face of experience. While there were some

unethical people I had to deal with people who not just me, but all my friends now know not to

work with most of the people I met had a very high sense of integrity, because they realized

that the most fundamental currency of business is trust. If you think of the biggest, most

successful companies, even if you dont like the products they sell, you fundamentally trust that

whenever you pop open a can of Coke in some far off country, compare prices at your local

Walmart, bite into a burger at McDonalds, or get on a Boeing plane you implicitly trust that

you know what youre getting.

Now, for most people in business, integrity means playing hard and fair in service to their self

interest. Business is fundamentally

based on competition and you cant

have competition without winners and

losers. However, theres a magical

element to capitalism that most people

dont realize. At the end of the day,

what were competing over is howmuch value we offer our customers.

While the short-term temptation is to

try and get the most money we can in

each transaction, long-term success is

determined by providing more value

than our competitors. Period. In fact,

one of the biggest complaints against

Walmart is that it provides too much

value to its customers, and so local

businesses cant compete! People get hurt in the chaotic whirlwinds of creative destruction that

accompany change and these people deserve our compassion. At the same time, its important

not to confuse the ends and the means when played by a set of properly regulated roles, the

end goal of business is not to trample on our competitors, but to serve our customers. And

in the process, everyone wins. Just look at the results of democratic capitalism vs. every other

political-economic system on earth. Communism? Crony dictatorship? Fascism? The feudal

system? Yes, theres a tremendous disparity between the richest and poorest people in a

capitalist society but as someone remarked to me once, America is a land where people drive

In our lifetime individualism has been so

strongthat we may not yet have had the occasion

to consider radically the notion of a truly common

life. It wouldnt take much to conceive of business

as an enterprise in service of families and

communities. It wouldnt take much imagination toconnect work with individual calling, oriented

towards the real needs of a community. Then we

might discover to our surprise that money,

business, commerce, and industry can all be part of

our work of the soul.

Thomas Moore

The Education of the Heart


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to their protests. Capitalism is the most powerful vehicle yet discovered for creating material

abundance and taking care of our physical needs.

And what about our spiritual needs for purpose, love, growth, and giving? In doing business, dowe have to check our heart at the door, or can business be spiritual? To me, spirituality means

loving and purpose. So while being religious can be deeply spiritual, spirituality can be

practiced in all areas of life. And in seeking to answer these questions, the key point is this:

business can be spiritual, but it doesnt have to be. We can do business in ways that meet both

our physical and spiritual needs, but this doesnt mean that everyone should do so. Its a choice.

When we choose to embrace both money and meaning, and do business in more loving ways,

things can seem harder at first. Bringing together business and spirituality often requires a

higher level of commitment to our personal and spiritual growth, and it often requires being

willing to break free from the common sense of the herd. It often means becoming a leader

instead of doing things the same way theyve always been done. However, the rewards can beextraordinary. Not only does this practice allow us to bring our whole selves to work, and create

businesses we love it also allows us to create extraordinary profits. For in every service

business Ive explored, Ive found loving to be the ultimate competitive advantage. (A bold

claim, which well explore in more detail in the module on value.)

Fred Kofman makes a wonderful analogy between doing business and playing tennis. Tennis is

a game with clear rules and a clear goal to win more points than your opponent, while

following the rules. Some people cheat at tennis, but this doesnt mean its a cheating sport it

just means the cheaters dont have the same goal as the rest of us. Some people play the sport

casually, for fun, but something magic happens when a group of people

compete intensely over the sport the level of play of each of them rises and rises quickly. Then theres the question of purpose. While many people

may define their purpose in playing quite simply as beating their opponents,

as having fun, or perhaps as making money and becoming famous theres

the potential for a higher purpose. As most any champion will attest, playing

at the highest levels requires something more than just a desire to win it

requires a spiritual devotion to becoming the best player and the best person

you can be. It requires intense self-discipline and self-mastery, an ability to

be completely present in the moment, and a Zen-like focus.

Similarly, while there are many who try to win at business by compromising their ethics and

violating the rules of the game, these people are not businessmen or businesswomen theyrecheaters playing a different game. And while many people play at business just for fun, or just to

make money, theres a higher purpose possible. If we anchor ourselves in our spiritual goals

while we play the game of business full-out, in service to our growth and our calling, the

competitive fray will support us to become the best we can be. It will inspire us to become the

best competitor we can be, the best provider of exceptional value we can be, and the best person

we can be.


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While I dont claim that business should be spiritual, Im heartened by the evidence of how its

increasingly becoming that way. It feels to me like were in the midst of a tremendous sea

change, where people are increasingly refusing to choose between money or meaning. Today,people are increasingly seeking to do business in ways that bring both profits and purpose.

As reported by Ian Mitroff in A Spiritual Audit of

Corporate America, while only 32% of the

managers and executives surveyed felt that religion

was important to their work, 90% felt that

spirituality was. In The Corporate Mystic, Gay

Hendricks and Kate Ludeman report that

Corporations are full of mystics. If you want to

find a genuine mystic, you are more likely to find

one in a boardroom than in a monastery orcathedral. In fact, one study found that not only do the majority of CEOs find their spirituality

important to their work they find it essential to their being able to do their job effectively.

And this trend is just getting started. After her earlier books successfully predicted the

importance and scope of the Internet revolution, in Megatrends 2010 Patricia Aburdene identifies

conscious capitalism as the megatrend of the next decade. In The New Wellness Revolution,

Paul Zane Pilzer details one segment of this business revolution (the wellness industry) and

shows how its rapidly expanding from a $100 billion a year to a trillion dollar industry. And in

The Cultural Creatives, Paul Ray and Sherry Anderson present research showing that over 50

million people in the United States are now voting with their pocketbooks for socially

responsible, purpose-driven companies.

The bottom line is this: while many people choose to play business just for success, it by no

means has to be that way. Business rewards integrity, and as long as we remember that the game

of business is the means and not the ends, it can readily be played in a way that fully supports

both our needs for money, meaning and growth.

The Challenge of Spirituality and Business

We can have it all. We can bring our spirituality to work. And in doing so, we can make our

work all the more successful. We can create practices that provide both money and meaning,

both profit and purpose. If this is so, then why does it often seem so hard? Why do we fear thatselling means taking? And why does spiritual business seem to be the exception rather than the

rule?

I believe the root answer to these questions is this: the core ethics behind spirituality and

business are fundamentally different, and few people have learned how to bring them

together. Business is based on money and competition, and when done well, its core ethics

involve trust and fairness. Spirituality is based on meaning and love, and when done well, its

"The market system brings prosperity to

those who satisfy the desires of others

in the best and least expensive way.

Wealth can only be attained by serving

the consumer.

Ludwig Von Mises


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Love is based on

Growth

and

Giving

Business is based on

Trust

and

Fairness

How can we

combine these

different value

systems?

Love is based on

Growth

and

Giving

Business is based on

Trust

and

Fairness

How can we

combine these

different value

systems?

Two Different Value Systems

core ethics involve growth and giving. These values are different, and its usually not obvious

how to integrate them. For example, my father is a business professor who has spent years

studying organizations that bring together different values systems, such as family businesses or

religious universities. As he puts it, In one way, running a family business is infinitely harder

than running a Fortune 500 company, because youre always one decision away from a civil

war. Say you want to fire Uncle Harry because of incompetence. Those who see the company

primarily as a business will tend to see this as the right ethical choice. Those who see thecompany primarily as a part of the family will tend to see it as a betrayal. Whereas in a company

that only cares about profits, while there may be lots of arguments about the best way to get

those profits, at the end of the day everyone agrees on a single clear way to measure success.

Its like business and love are different games, each with different sets of rules. Things go

smoothly as long as everyone agrees which game were playing and what the rules for that game

are. However, when we bring the two games together, such as when we ask our family to invest

in a new business venture, or when we ask our friends to join a network marketing company,

things can get much more challenging. In these situations, its easy for different parties to have

different expectations. One may think this is about money and business while the other feels

this is about love and friendship. And if things go badly, friendships can be lost and families

torn apart. Many of the most painful business conflicts Ive seen or been part of have involved

times when business and love were combined in less than fully conscious ways.

From a set of excruciating mistakes, I learned a key lesson: the more loving a business

relationship is, the more explicit we need to make our agreements, not less. Which rules are

we playing by? What happens if things go south? How can we bring together our spiritual


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optimism while also embracing the often harsh realities of business? Put simply, conscious

business requires us to be conscious about how were doing business.

This challenge is particularly acute when it comes to the question of sales and marketing.Particularly for spiritually based practice builders, we tend to have deep-seated fears about

selling our services. And while we may judge these fears as irrational limitations that we

should just be able to think our way past, theres actually good reasons why we have them.

Traditionally, a lot of sales efforts have been done with a taking energy, and so weve developed

deep associations that sales means taking. Every time we have a telemarketer call during dinner,

or we receive yet another spam email selling Viagra, our basic self decides that sales is

something we need to build defenses against. Weve been exposed to Selling By Taking so

often that weve learned to treat sales efforts as attacks and if sales means taking, how could

we not have fears of doing violence to others? If our commitment is to love and service, how

could Selling By Taking not feel out of integrity? Deep down, we intuitively sense the conflictsbetween the different value systems, and we rightly fear the dangers of trying to fill our purpose-

driven practices with the taking energy that so often comes with doing business as usual.

The 3 Keys to Selling By Giving

So how do we deal with these fears? How do we embrace both spirituality and business? How

do we consciously negotiate the potential conflicts between the two value systems? How do we

build a practice that is both soul-centered and creates a six-figure income (i.e. financial freedom,

whatever that looks like for you)?

In my experience, it all starts with three root principles the 3 Keys that allow us to move from

our fears of Selling By Taking, to the service, freedom and abundance that comes from Selling

By GivingTM. The 3 Keys to Selling By Giving empower us to cleanly integrate business and

spirituality, and to turn our sales efforts into acts of love.

I define spirituality as the process of finding meaning and fulfillment

through the practice of love. And because love is the highest law,

the secret to spiritual business is to translate the values of love

into the world of business. We take the key rules from the higher

game (spirituality) and bring them to the lower game (business). So

how do we do this? We take three core aspects of love giving,

growth and loving communication and translate these principlesinto the language of business. These become the three keys to doing

spiritual business, which I call The 3 Keys to Selling By Giving.

1. Provide Exceptional Value. Selling By Giving starts by adopting a total commitment

to providing exceptional value. This is the first magic element that allows us to unify

spirituality and business. It translates the ethic ofgiving into the context of business.

And it provides a safety net that frees us from having to be perfect. We all have aspects


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of ourselves that yearn to give and aspects that yearn to take. Even when we feel like

engaging in Selling By Taking, our commitment to providing exceptional value ensures

that each sale is a gift. This creates self-trust and allows us to strive for excellenceinstead of perfection. For example, with my coaching I guarantee that each client will

receive at least three times the value they paid for, or they can ask for (and receive) a

refund for that months fee. When people hear about this, they often think Im nuts,

because they think it means Im setting an unrealistically high standard for myself, or

they fear that people will take advantage of the offer. They worry about the 1 person in

100 who might ask for a refund. They think that my guarantee makes it harder for me to

be successful. But in my experience, the opposite is true.

My exceptional value guarantee is one of the greatest keys both to my success and to my

freedom! It frees me to charge high prices without having to worry about being perfect.

Particularly as I was getting started, Id occasionally have a day where I felt off, and Ididnt feel like Id delivered exceptional value. When this happened, Id sometimes tell

my clients This session didnt measure up to my standard of providing exceptional value,

so Im not going to charge you for it. Is that okay with you? How do you think they

reacted to that? In my experience, very well! It turned potentially negative situations

into opportunities to strengthen the trust in our relationship. And it created customer

astonishment that turned into word of mouth referrals. Our commitment to exceptional

value ensures that every sale we make is a gift to our clients. It frees us to be do sales

from a spiritual place without having to devalue our services with cut-rate prices. And it

creates the freedom to make mistakes and learn from them. Which brings us to the

second key to Selling By Giving.2. Practice a Learning Orientation to Life. The next step is to embrace the inner conflicts

that conscious business brings up, and use our negative emotions and experiences as

opportunities for learning, upliftment and growth. This

step translates the ethic of growth into the context of

business. This means turning our business practice into a

spiritual practice a sort of tantric business. Heres the

deal. Each of us have aspects of ourselves that yearn to

give and aspects that yearn to take. We have places inside where were loving and

places where were afraid. And the practice of selling our services is one of the most

effective ways I know of to bring those fears to the surface. Selling naturally brings upour fears of unworthiness, of being corrupted by business, of being rejected and gives

us the opportunity to heal and release them.

Building a soul-centered, six-figure practice means stepping into spiritual leadership it

means bringing our light to the world, and it means becoming role models for how to do

business in a new, more loving way. I believe that the meaning of life comes from

growth and giving, and growth comes by finding the places inside ourselves where we

You are love itself

when you are not afraid.

Nisargadatta Maharaj


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feel less than fully loving, and lovingly working with those pieces. Our greatest growth

does not come when were feeling all happy and loving. Our greatest growth happens

when we feel the most scared and upset and then in the midst of our darkness, wechoose back towards the light. Doing so involves taking 100% personal

responsibility for our emotions, and mastering the Five Core Practices of spiritual

psychology: acceptance, loving self-discipline, self-awareness, healing, and self-

forgiveness. These practices are taught in depth at the University of Santa Monica

(www.gousm.edu) theyre covered more fully in Love Beyond Belief (a soon to be

published book) and are integrated together in Byron Katies brilliant process The

Work (www.thework.com).

3. Only Connect. Selling is based on building

relationships. Selling By Taking does so by

speaking at people, while Selling By Giving builds relationships by connecting with them.

This step translates the ethic of loving

communication into the context of business. It

involves focusing more on listening than on

talking, and by communicating in ways that are

authentic, transparent and client-focused. I learned this third principle from my

partner, coach and mentor, Steve Chandler. I met Steve during the first weekend of an

extraordinary one year program on Soul Centered Leadership. On taking the stage, he

announced that his intention was to teach us everything he knew about public speaking

in two words. We were dumbfounded. Two words? How could he possibly condensehis decades of experience into two words? What two words could they be? And if he

was successful, what were we going to spend the rest of the year on? After a sufficient

pause to let this sink in, and after a few minutes spent collecting guesses from the

audience, Steve pulled out a thick, black, permanent marker, and slowly drew the

following two words on a simple white flip chart.

Only Connect

He then kept us spellbound for over four hours as he proceeded to model this simple

concept. He explained that the default for most public speakers is to talk at their

audience. The presenter walks confidently up to a large podium on a big stage, is

introduced as an important expert, and then literally has to look down on the audience in

order to see them. Most presentations are really about the speaker what does he think is

important? What does she want to talk about? Why are they so special that we should

listen to them? In contrast, Steve made each of us feel like we were having an individual

conversation with him. He regularly engaged the audience, and deeply listened to

everything we had to say. I never saw him make any of us wrong, or talk down to us.

His humor was hilarious, without belittling people or going for obscene shock value.

If there is any one secret of

success, it lies in the ability to get

the other persons point of view

and see things from that persons

angle as well as our own.

Henry Ford


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Steve regularly humbled himself, and shared the depths of his experience and many

failures. He was authentic. He was transparent. And he kept his communication

client-focused he sought to understand where we were coming from, and what ourperspective was, so he could Only Connect.

In addition to the fears that come up around selling our services (which we often interpret as

selling ourselves) one of the most common practice building challenges happens when we

think about marketing our services. We tend to come up with a long list of things we have to

do before we can even think of being successful. Oh, I need to have professional looking

business cards, and a professional looking web site, and I have to describe what I do in

professional language. I need to have a glossy, professional brochure, and a professional

sounding company name. I need mailers and advertising and However, this is just not true.

Theres nothing wrong with creating professional looking marketing materials, and they can add

to your credibility but all too often we use them as a way of creating an image, when whatreally matters is for us to create authentic connections with the people we are seeking to

serve. Instead of trying to convince people of how great our services are, all we really need to

do is find ways ofgiving away tastes of our exceptional value and then charging for it.

For example, when I started my practice, I thought I should create a professional looking

newsletter, with gorgeous graphics and complicated formatting. But my friend Auren Hoffman

pointed out how doing so creates the impression of selling at rather than connecting with my

audience. So instead, I keep my newsletters short and simple, and always strive to make them a

gift. I put the reading time at the top (i.e. reading time: 2 minutes) so people know how long it

will take, and I get to the point quickly, so people can tell whether or not this gift would be a fit

for them.

The bottom line is this: our common sense about sales and marketing often doesnt make

sense. The way that most sales and marketing is practiced is either not important, not effective

or not in alignment for spiritually based practice builders. Instead, we

have the opportunity to fill our practices doing what were already really

good at by creating authentic relationships based on exceptional value,

mutual learning and growth, and connection. We dont have to be

professional we just need to be real.

That said, building a successful, soul-centered practice is like baking a

chocolate souffl. There are relatively few ways to create a successfulsouffl or practice compared to all the ways there are to mess it up.

If were going to be successful, we need to have a recipe for success, acquire the ingredients the

recipe calls for, and put them together in just the right way. There are thousands of things we

can focus on in building our practices and only a few of them are really important. In fact,

only six of them are truly essential. Were going to cover those, but first lets take a closer look

at the 9 Fatal Business Mistakes.


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The 9 Fatal Business MistakesImagine that someone was to walk up to you on the street, and tell you that your practice was

making a series of fatal business mistakes? How might you feel? If youre like me, you

probably wouldnt jump for joy. I believe the author Robert Quinn when he says that feedback

is the breakfast of champions, yet I often feel scared to receive constructive feedback. However,

learning about the 9 Fatal Business Mistakes may be one of the most valuable practice building

gifts you can receive. For in my experience, these mistakes point to a series of easily mastered

learning opportunities the 9 Foundational Business Milestones each of which can transform

your practice for the better.

What if your car wasnt working, but you didnt know what was wrong with it? Would you just

start randomly pulling pieces out and replacing them? Or would you find a competent mechanic

to help you diagnose the problem? In my experience, while we know to get an expert diagnosis

when our car isnt working, we dont tend to do this when our practice isnt working. Put

another way, 90% of our results come from 10% of our efforts. If someone could tell you a few

key things to focus on that would cause your revenues to triple, would that be exciting? Would

that be interesting information? Well, thats the taste of exceptional value I hope to offer you

with this short exercise. For in helping practice builders give their way to a soul-centered, six-

figure practice Ive discovered two key things. First, most practices are making at least two of

the 9 Fatal Business Mistakes. And second, each mistake that we turn into a learning

opportunity can increase a practices revenue by $10,000 a year or more.

1. Limiting Beliefs

Mistake: Believing that we cant succeed at business and still be a good person.

Milestone: Healing our inner conflicts between business and spirituality.

Most of us have deep inner conflicts over money and business. Pieces of us yearn to have more

money, and yet other pieces may fear that success in business means taking it from others.

These conflicts tend to be particularly acute for purpose-driven practice builders and for some

very good reasons. While we may judge ourselves for having these learning edges (i.e. I

shouldnt have these fears and conflicts or If this was really my calling, I wouldnt have these

issues) building a soul-centered, six-figure practice means integrating two very different values

systems together it means bringing together love and business. When this integration is doneconsciously and wisely, incredible results can follow. However, there arent very many role

models for this, particularly when it comes to sales and marketing. So we naturally learn to

associate sales with taking and profits with profiteering. And as long as a part of us believes that

money and spirituality arent compatible, it makes it extremely difficult to create a practice that

provides both money and meaning.


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In this program, An Introduction to Selling By Giving, weve been learning how to integrate

business and spirituality and take the next steps in releasing your limiting beliefs about business.

This is a powerful stand-along program, and it also serves as the first module in the full 8-module Selling By Giving course.

2. Poor Focus

Mistake: Inadequate focus on the 10% of our activities that will bring us 90% of our

results.

Milestone: Focusing our efforts on the 6 Essential Elements of a soul-centered, six-

figure practice.

There are many things that were often told we should do in order to build a successful

practice, such as business cards, brochures, web sites, insurance, advertising, business licenses,

office space, newsletters, finding the right name and much more. Given this, we often tend to

feel so overwhelmed that we avoid doing anything. Or else we try to do everything and get

overwhelmed. However, we dont need to do everything, we just need to do the most important

things. There are 6 Essential Elements to creating a soul-centered, six-figure practice the 6

things to focus on, that will generate 90% of your results.

You can learn about these 6 elements in the next section of this program, and then the 8-module

Selling By Giving course teaches practice builders how to master them, in an easy, one-step-at-a-

time fashion.

3. Disconnection from Purpose

Mistake: Using negative motivators to try and shock our way to success.

Milestone: Upgrading our emotional fuel source to run on positive energy.

Procrastination isnt a sign of laziness, unworthiness or mental illness. Its the natural result of

using negative emotions (i.e. fear, guilt, anger and pain) as a primary source of motivation.

When we should on ourselves (i.e. I should get this done today) what were really doing is

bringing out the Cattle Prod of Guilt and giving ourselves a little shock. This amps our body up,

and when used occasionally, it can be very powerful. However, every time we do so, our body

also learns that the activity were trying to do is painful and so the next time we think about

doing it, our body starts to feel afraid (i.e. No, noplease dont shock me again!) and we

experience resistance to doing the task. We often respond to this resistance with more guilt, and

so our body finds itself caught between fear and guilt. Once were in this spot, our body fears

pain if we do the task and pain if we dont and so our mind looks for some way to put off making

a decision. The solution to this is to upgrade our emotional fuel source, so that our engine runs

on purpose, love, and self-honoring choices.


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Module 2 of the 8-module Selling By Giving course teaches how to release procrastination and

insecurity by upgrading our emotional fuel source.

The entire Selling By Giving system is based on a total commitment to providing exceptionalvalue. Doing so creates the freedom to be authentic, and the opportunity to build a practice that

provides both money and meaning. However, if a service doesnt offer value, the more we

market it, the faster people will learn not to purchase it. Word gets around quickly when people

arent satisfied with a service. But if theyre merely satisfied, they tend not to say anything. In

contrast, when we surprise our customers with the exceptional value we provide, the word

spreads, and referrals start knocking on our door.

In building a practice, we naturally go through an internship phase, where the primary goal is

to master our ability to offer exceptional value. We may do this by working for another firm, by

giving away sessions, or by charging a discount rate for our services. If you are in this phase, the

Selling By Giving classes may be a little early for you.

4. Insufficient Trust in Your Exceptional Value

Mistake: Not believing that our services offer exceptional value.

Milestone: Developing our exceptional value through presence, client commitment and

exceptional expertise; and developing trust in our exceptional value by getting detailed

client feedback.

Most of the practice builders Ive worked with are already providing exceptional value to their

clients. The issue usually isnt the level of value we offer its our fears about the value weoffer. Because of these fears, we tend to avoid asking for detailed feedback from our clients

and yet getting this feedback is one of the fastest ways to release these fears.

In module 3 of the 8-module Selling By Giving course, you can learn the most important factors

for creating exceptional value, and how to cultivate your self-trust in the exceptional value you

offer.

5. Real Hourly Rate

Mistake: Pursuing a business model that wont generate a real hourly rate of at least

$50/hour.

Milestone: Shifting our focus from our nominal hourly rate to our real hourly rate.

Most practice builders focus on how much they charge per hour, which I call your nominal

hourly rate. However, what matters most is your real hourly rate, which includes all the hours

youre putting in. You could be charging $150 an hour, but if youre only billing 5 hours a week


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Mistake: Experiencing sales as involving scarcity, fear, taking or manipulation.

Milestone: Learning how to practice sales in a way that you and your clients experience

as a gift.

The two most common approaches to sales are either to do it from a place of taking and

manipulation or else to avoid it entirely. And while there are lots of examples of Selling By

Taking, it doesnt have to be this way. Sales can be done from a place of joy and service, where

we focus on giving away tastes of our exceptional value, and then helping people determine

whether or not they could receive exceptional value from our services. It involves building

relationships where our clients stair-step their way to higher levels of trust in the exceptional

value theyre going to receive, and their commitment to doing so.

You can learn how to embrace sales and turn it in to a service practice in module 6 of the 8-

module Selling By Giving course.

9. Extreme Positioning

Mistake: Selecting a target market that is either much too large or much too small.

Milestone: Selecting a market niche that makes it easy for people to know who to refer

to you.

Positioning is the art of finding your market niche. Its your answer to the question what do

you do? And it determines where you focus your marketing and sales. Most practice builders

make one of two key positioning mistakes they either dont focus their niche enough (so theycompete with everyone) or they focus it too much (so they have no market). Both of these

mistakes make it much harder to create critical mass with your word of mouth referrals.

Module 7 of the 8-module Selling By Giving course teaches how to position your practice

effectively.


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The 6 Essential ElementsOne of the most important functions of this course is to help us learn the essential aspects of

businesses to focus on. In business, 90% of our results often come from 10% of our efforts but

which 10%? There are millions of things we could be doing to build a practice, but which ones

are really going to be crucial to our success? And this brings us to the second Fatal Business

Mistake.

Fatal Business Mistake #2: Inadequate focus on the 10% of activities that will bring us

90% of our results.

Foundational Business Milestone #2: Focusing our efforts on the 6 Essential Elements

of a soul-centered, six-figure practice.

So lets learn about the 10% that matters. Out of all the things we could do to build our practices,

there are six ingredients that are most essential. These are shown in the figure below. Well be

learning about these six elements in this class one per week and then putting them in to

practice. Mastering these different pieces is an iterative process, which you will develop over

time. We dont need to have mastered all of them before we can start building our practice and

at the same time, they serve as the recipe for success were going to work with in this class.

1. Purpose. This is the essence of what makes your practice soul-centered. Your practice

is not just a job its also part of your inspiration, your purpose, and your reason for

living. Now, this is easy in theory. However, have you ever found yourself

procrastinating when it comes to doing something you know you should do as part of

CO-CREATIVE

POSITIONING

Communities Who


At What You Do

PURPOSE

What Fulfills You

And You Care

Deeply About

VALUE

How You Offer

Exceptional

Value To

Your Clients

PROFITS

Business Models

That Create

Financial

Abundance

YOUR

BUSINESS







YOUR CLIENTS

AND CUSTOMERS

CO-CREATIVE

POSITIONING

Communities Who


At What You Do

PURPOSE

What Fulfills You

And You Care

Deeply About

VALUE

How You Offer

Exceptional

Value To

Your Clients

PROFITS

Business Models

That Create

Financial

Abundance

YOUR

BUSINESS













YOUR CLIENTS

AND CUSTOMERS

The 6 Essential Elements of Selling By Giving


28/36



fulfilling your purpose? Virtually everyone does, and the first essential element involves

learning how to release this pattern by connecting with the loving energy inherent in our

purpose, and using this energy as our practice building fuel. Huh? Let me explain.There are three root sources of motivation: avoiding pain, seeking pleasure, and the

power of love. Procrastination, guilt, anxiety and depression are not signs of weakness or

unworthiness theyre the natural result of trying to use pain to jolt ourselves towards

success. This happens when our motivation is based on I fear, I need and I should.

It happens when we tell ourselves I should go sell something today or I should do my

homework for this class. When we do this, we feel a little jolt of fear and guilt we get

a little zap of negative energy we can use to try and prod ourselves into doing something

we have resistance to. But every time we do that, we create more resistance, because our

body learns to associate that activity with pain and fear. This works like it did with

Pavlovs dogs, where they learned to associate a bell with being fed, and then theydsalivate any time the bell was rung whether or not there was any food. For example, I

used to dislike paying my bills, and so Id procrastinate on paying them. Id let them pile

up higher and higher until finally Id get so worried about having my utilities or credit

cards cut off that Id jolt myself into action. However, each time I did this, I made it that

much harder to pay my bills the next time. What started as a mild dislike became a

painful aversion, until it got to the point where I couldnt even look at a bill without

feeling bad.

Dependence on negative motivators is both the root

cause and primary result of Selling By Taking. And

its an epidemic. Remarkably, most of us have become addicted to negative motivators weve

become addicted to pain. This pattern is so prevalent

we no longer even call it pain we call it stress. In contrast, the power of love is based

on the simultaneous practice of acceptance and loving self-discipline, and is sourced out

of our deeply wired desires for growth and giving. In other words, Selling By Giving is

based on love: loving our work, loving our clients, loving what we sell, and loving our

selves. Now, this doesnt happen by deciding I should be loving, for the power of love

is based not on I should but on I choose. It happens by connecting with what we

most want (i.e. self-awareness), by developing habits of making self-honoring choices

(i.e. loving self-discipline), and by adopting a Learning Orientation to Life (i.e. throughacceptance, loving self-discipline, self-awareness, healing and self-forgiveness).

2. Value. This is the element that connects heaven and earth. Its easy to get caught up in

purpose and spiritual fulfillment, while losing touch with financial reality. Its easy to get

caught up in economics and worldly success, while losing touch with the meaning of our

lives. The magical component that integrates the two the creative alchemy at the heart

of soul-centered business is the drive to offer exceptional value to our clients. The

We can achieve any whatif

we have a big enough why.

Anthony Robbins


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temptation in business is to focus on taking from others which is why we have so many

defenses to being sold by others. We rightly perceive most sales efforts as attacks on

our pocketbooks, created by people who are focused on how much money they can getfrom us. However, when the top companies and academics crunched the numbers to

determine what makes a top salesperson, they found something surprising. It turns out

that the most successful salespeople by far are the ones who focus on what they can

give rather than on what they can get. They found that the number one recipe for sales

success is to get inside our customers shoes,

and to focus on serving them to be willing

to put our customers long terms needs

ahead of our companys short term needs.

For example, with this class, my

commitment is that you receive value worth

at least 10 times your tuition. Think about

that when was the last time you felt you

got 10 times your moneys worth on a purchase?! When this happens, it rocks peoples

worlds and transforms clients in to champions. By offering exceptional value, our

clients become our ambassadors, word of mouth begins to spread, we align ourselves

with our purpose and we create financial abundance, all at the same time! How do we

do this? Well talk more about this later, but the three most important factors for creating

exceptional value in a service business are spiritual presence, client commitmentand

exceptional expertise.

Plus, exceptional value often involves doing something different, so you can move out ofcommoditized, cost-based pricing and into value-based pricing. It involves getting

regular, honest feedback from your clients about the level of value they feel theyre

receiving. And it involves the principle that less is more that the more tightly we define

a market niche, the more value we can offer each person in it that were seeking to serve.

3. Economics. This is the essence of what makes your practice bring in six figures a year

to bring in a level of income that creates financial freedom for you and those you love.

The term six figures is a placeholder it might mean $100,000 a year to you, or it

might mean $50,000 or $500,000. The point is that your practice is not just a gift of love

it also creates financial abundance for yourself, your family, and the causes you believe

in. Doing so means letting go of your fears and limiting beliefs about business, andembracing the economic realities of this planet. And it means architecting a business

model that works for you not against you.

While naked greed doesn't work as the foundation of a conscious business, neither does

naked giving. When we refuse to charge what our products and services are worth, or

when we adopt unprofitable business models, we can be completely on purpose and

completely broke. Just as food and water are essential for a persons survival, income

Nordstrom would go way out of its

way to absolutely startle and astonish

its customers. Out of these single acts,

people talked. Surprise someone

enough and theyll talk forever.

Steve Chandler


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and profits are essential for a companys survival. And healthy profits require more than

just exceptional value they also require a profitable business model. There are many

more ways to structure a business that will cause it to lose money, than there are ways tostructure a business that will cause it to make money. Put another way, a business model

is like a car engine. There are many pieces that must work together for an engine to

function. And we can set as many positive intentions as we like, but if the engine doesnt

work, the cars not going to take us where we want to go.

A relentless, simple-minded focus on the intersection of

these three circles purpose, value, and economics forms

the essence of your practice. It creates a service that can be

both highly profitable and fulfilling, and where instead of

selling your services, you just need to find ways of giving

people a taste of the exceptional value you provide. Theremaining three elements then involve the processes of communicating what you do and building

relationships with potential clients. It involves marketing, selling and positioning your services

and doing so in ways that are in complete alignment with your spiritual purpose. These elements

are the real meat of Selling By Giving where we show you concrete ways to give your way

to a soul-centered, six-figure practice.

4. Web of Trust Marketing. Traditional marketing is becoming increasingly ineffective,

particularly for small businesses and people who are self-employed. Because of the

combination of advertising overload and our association of sales as taking, we've

developed tremendous defenses to anything that smells of sales. The new holy grail of

marketing is viral marketing or word of mouth marketing but how do you makethis happen? You do it by giving away tastes of exceptional value to your web of

trust. Instead of creating each relationship from scratch, you harness existing, trust

based networks. These networks are wide open, because they are based on love and

giving rather than profit and taking. At the same time, they are exquisitely sensitive to

Selling By Taking taking energy acts like acid on these webs. On the other hand,

magic often happens when we offer tastes of exceptional value to a web of trust; clearly

communicate who and how we serve; act with authenticity, transparency and client-focus;

and make it easy for people to pass these gifts on to their friends.

5. Value Based Enrollment. While both marketing and sales involve communication,

marketing is primarily a filtering process, and sales is primarily a relationship buildingprocess. Marketing is about finding people who might be a fit for our exceptional value

and equally important, quickly eliminating those who are not. Once weve connected

with people we could potentially serve, Value Based Enrollment involves nurturing the

two primary aspects to a Selling By Giving relationship: the level of trust that

exceptional value will be provided, and the level of commitment to doing so. The

easiest way to develop this trust is usually by giving the client a direct experience of your

It is not enough to be busy, so

are the ants. The question is,

what are we busy about?

Henry David Thoreau


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Trust

Commitmen

t

Trust

Commitmen

t

Trust

Commitmen

t

Sales as Relationship Building

exceptional value. Then the

primary ways clients demonstrate

their commitment is by investingtheir time and money. And the

primary mistakes in sales are

either asking for commitment

before sufficient trust has been

established or not asking at all.

So, the ideal enrollment process

involves a series of stair-steps,

where the flat piece of each step

involves creating trust, the

upwards piece involves creating

commitment, and the trust-building steps are larger than the commitment-requesting ones.

If the commitment request is too large, it moves from being a stepping stone to a wall.

And if its too small, the business wont generate the profits it needs to survive. So value

based enrollment is based on a trust, commit, trust, commit process. Each step builds a

relationship based on a shared goal the intention to create exceptional value for the

client, in ways that also create healthy profits for the business.

6. Co-Creative Positioning. Perhaps the most common challenge with communication is

our tendency to be self-focused rather than other-focused: our tendency to speak at our

audience rather than connect with them. Similarly, when faced with the question What

do you do? we tend to answer in terms of our solutions and capabilities (what we thinkabout) rather than in terms of the needs we serve (what our clients think about).

Ultimately, customers care about what it is they want (i.e. the benefits theyre seeking)

rather than what it is we provide (i.e. the features we offer). And less is more: the more

we focus our market niche, the more value we can provide to each person in that niche.

So how do we find our niche? We look for underserved needs. We take action. We

listen for feedback. And we look for patterns. Instead of answering the question What

do you do? we practice answering the four key questions that define our positioning:

Why do I serve? Who do I serve? What needdo I serve? and Howdo I provide

exceptional value? We course-correct. We let our positioning find us as much as we

find it. And we look for communities where we can realistically become known as being

#1 or #2 at what we do.

Why communities where were known as #1 or #2 at what we do? People carry around a

bunch of boxes in their heads, which they associate with different services they know

will meet their needs. And in each box, they typically carry at most two names the top

two service providers in that box. For example, if someone mentions that they need a

housekeeper in Santa Monica, I have one name I would recommend my housekeeper.

If someone is looking for a low priced therapist in Santa Monica I have another name,


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as well as a name for a therapist in Silicon Valley. While we can build a successful

practice without this step, it becomes much easier to generate word of mouth referrals

when a community decides that were the go to guy (or gal) for a given need. Whenwe become known within a community as one of the top two solutions that provides

exceptional value regarding a particular need, word of mouth tends to hit critical mass,

the phone starts ringing, and our Selling By Giving practice takes on a life of its own.

Each of these six pieces interact with each other, and getting all the pieces to fit together involves

trying something, gathering feedback, course correcting, and then taking action again. Its a bit

like playing with one of my favorite puzzles as a kid, this thing with seven or eight blue plastic,

simple, three-dimensional pieces. The goal was to put them all together in a perfect cube and

the box exclaimed how there were thousands of possible solutions

but I couldnt seem to find a single one! Eventually, by a

combination of blind luck and stubborn determination, after tryinghundreds of different ways of fitting the pieces together, I

stumbled on a solution. Eureka! In finding your own solution, it

may take some trial and error and at the same time, the full

Selling By Giving course can provide you with a solution guide

for the puzzle. It doesnt have all the answers, but it will help you

understand the pieces youre playing with, the solution youre

working towards, and some of the most important secrets for solving the puzzle. This course

can enable you to start moving rapidly towards your goal, dramatically minimize the trial and

error process, and help you grow your practice at maximum speed.


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Module Summary - Introduction

Key Concepts

Key distinctions:

Business as a battle betweenenemies vs. as a system of mutualservice.

Sales as taking vs. serving.

Customers as clients vs.champions.

The six elements, or puzzle pieces, to yoursoul-centered, six-figure practice:

Purpose What fulfills you and youcare deeply about.

Value How you offer exceptionalvalue to your clients.

Economics Business models thatcreate financial abundance.

Web of Trust Marketing Giving

away tastes of your exceptionalvalue to your web of trust.

Value Based Enrollment Buildingrelationships based on trust andcommitment to exceptional value.

Co-Creative Positioning Communities who will consider you#1 or #2 at what you do.

Checklist To Success

Intention A sincere desire tomanifest a practice that meets yourneeds both for money and formeaning.

Business Beliefs Reducing your Icant succeed at business and still bea good person index to 5 or below.

Commitment 100% commitment to

playing the game of business fairlyand full-out, in service to your spiritualgrowth and purpose.

Enthusiasm A willingness toembrace this journey, and have funalong the way!

Fatal Mistakes

Limiting Beliefs Believing that we cantsucceed at business and still be a goodperson.

Poor Focus Inadequate focus on the 10%of our activities that will bring us 90% of ourresults.

Less than 5% of new businesses make a successful, stable, six-figure income for their founders let alone allow them to manifest their purpose.

This module described the essential factors that can enable you to beat these odds, and createa joy-filled, purpose-filled practice that also creates financial abundance for you and those youlove.

Then the next seven modules in the full Selling By Giving course will help you create a completesystem for mastering these essential factors, and radically accelerating you along the pathtowards creating your own soul-centered, six-figure practice, whatever that means to you. Tolearn more, please visit www.sixfigurepractice.net.

Check me!

Check me!

Check me!

Check me!


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Bio for Brian Whetten, Ph.D., M.A.Brian Whettens career to date has largely been the story of an

unexpected and unplanned transformation, from being an introverted

technologist and computer science academic, through becoming a Silicon

Valley entrepreneur and executive, and then into what will likely be a

lifelong process of personal growth and development.

By the age of 30, Brian had received a Ph.D., raised $20 million for two

high tech startups, navigated multiple major life crises, become an

internationally known academic and speaker, made and lost millions

and burnt out twice. He had gone from being the one in high school that

the chess team made fun of to seemingly having it all. Yet he felt miserable. In the midst of anemotional and spiritual crisis, he began reaching out for help, and found his worldview shaken to

its core. After suddenly getting the futility of trying to achieve his way to love, he turned his

beat-down-the-walls-with-his-forehead determination inwards and immersed himself in six years

of personal and spiritual development, with a series of incredible teachers, counselors, coaches

and programs.

Today, Brian delights in doing business in a different, more

loving, more purpose filled way and in helping others do

the same. He specializes in supporting entrepreneurs and

executives as they build companies that create both money

and meaning, and in teaching practice builders how to give

their way to a soul-centered, six-figure practice.

However, this is not to say he has all the answers. He continues to reach out for help, and is

particularly grateful for the coaching hes receiving as part of his partnership with master author,

coach and public speaker Steve Chandler.

Brians Ph.D. is in Computer Science from UC Berkeley. His first real job was as the

principal founder, President and CTO of an Internet startup, GlobalCast Communications. This

was acquired by Talarian, which went public and then was acquired by TIBCO. His M.A. is in

Spiritual Psychology from the University of Santa Monica. His service practices include life and

executive coaching, writing, public speaking, teaching, and facilitation.

With his new focus on servant leadership, he is committed to providing exceptional value to each

client he works with.

To learn more about Brian or about Selling By Giving, please visit www.sixfigurepractice.net.


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What People are Saying about Selling By Giving

This course has been absolutely life-changing for me! For 2 years Id beenunsuccessfully trying to start my Healing Practice. Now, I know without adoubt Ill be able to implement what Ive learned and make a success of mypractice. And it's simple! I find it SO easy to give away the little tastes of myexceptional value, and people are ALWAYS delighted and surprised by suchan offer. This was the most valuable course I have EVER attended, and it hasput my dream back in my reach!

Liesel TevershamCertified Quantum-Touch Instructorwww.clearspace.za.net

"Thank you from the bottom of my bank account. Who knew business couldfeel so good."

Melanie DuPuyBreathing-Life Coachwww.breatheinbreatheout.net

Brian's course was all about delivering exceptional value, and boy did itever practice what it preaches! Even though I already had a lot of prior

business experience, I figure it saved me $50,000 - $100,000 and trimmed mypractice building process from two years to six months. A 10 times return oninvestment? Try 100 to 200 times! If you are self employed or want to be, allI can say is Take This Course!

Michael SchantzExecutive Coach

I must recommend Brian Whetten's Selling By Giving approach. It hasmade a tremendous difference in my practice, which has tripled since I started using it. It is easy, heart-centered, and effective. So manyLightworkers just want to do the work they love and don't like to have to think

about marketing. Imagine marketing being graceful, making a difference forpeople, creating value, and bringing in amazing, wonderful Clients!

Susan OrtolanoPsychic Relationship Coachwww.radiantpathways.com


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What People are Saying about Selling By Giving

Brian is a phenomenal instructor. His course is extremely powerful atclearing and removing blocks to success and then not only giving you the tools,but also ushering in the energy, to manifest a Soul-Centered Six FigurePractice. Just being in the energy of this workshop has moved mountains in myIntuitive Life Coaching practice.

Alanna ArthurIntuitive Wellness Coachwww.AwakeningTheDivineWithin.net

Brian, I have to share that this 4th chapter was incredibly powerful for me inseeing that I truly have a valuable service and package (me!) and Spirit hasbeen giving me the IDENTICAL message in different ways this entire week! THANK YOU, BRIAN! Your course is simply magnificent and so well presentedand articulated. Beyond providing extraordinary value, you deliver a deeplyrewarding experience."

Frances FujiExecutive Coachwww.ceo2.com

What I received from Brian Whetten's class was the realization that I hadcommitted a fatal business flaw--at least one! if not many others. As a result, Istarted doubting my offering, its value and myself. To think, I almost 'gave up'-- inches from the water trove, the paradise of doing my true heart's desire and

ebook - an introduction to selling by giving

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