editor at large: it2(sw) langston

8/14/2019 Editor at Large: It2(Sw) Langston

1/13

So why do w e protectthis oil platfo rm? Simple: ABOTis responsible fo r nearly 85% ofthe Iraqi governmental revenuewith the more than one millionbarrels of crude oil it produces

each day. The personnel sta-tioned on the platform are re-sponsible for the defense of theplatform, and its a responsibilitythat they obviously do not takelight ly. The tou r was a greatlearning experience and ithelped many of us understandthe big p icture just a little bitbetter. Thanks to those whowelcomed us on the platformand provided us with the oppor-tunity to see the history andhear the stories. Also, specialthanks has to go out to the peo-ple who are responsible forsetting the tours up, getting theRHIB in the water, and all thelogistics that went into makingour tours happen.

(SEE ABOT RA DRILL PG 3)

Many of us were givenan opportunity to tour the oilplatform ABOT over the last fewweeks. I signed up for this touropportunity as soon as I heardabout it. After all, I wanted to

see exactly what it w as that wewere protecting and why w ewere steaming around in t hisbox. Thanks to the tour, I gotthat chance to find out this in-formation and quite a bit mo re.

We took a short ride inthe RHIB over to the platformwhere we were greeted andgiven bottles of w ater. The intro-ductory tour began w ith basicinformation about ABOT, or AlBasrah Oil Terminal. It was inter-esting to discover that ABOTwas constructed in 1975 and it

was only expected to last for 20years. Looking around, it waseasy to see that there had beenreconstruction and other cos-metic work done on the plat-form to p rolong its life.

We moved up onelevel to check out the CommandCenter of the platform. I thinkwe were all surprised to see thatthe offices of the staff sta-tioned on the platform weresimple CONNEX boxes. Wedidnt get a chance to look in-side one, but lets face it, how

luxurious can you make a CON-NEX box?

As we continued ourtour, we heard stories aboutattacks on the platform and thenumerous attempts by differentcount ries to take it over. Storiesabout how the U.S. Navy Sealsstormed the platforms and tookcontrol of it we recounted,along with stories like how suici-dal water craft came inbound atthe platform in 2004. Bulletholes can still be found through-

out the platform from the vari-ous gun fights that had takenplace. One platform in particularwas riddled with bullet holes.Someone had drawn a chalkoutline of a body on the deck in

jest. It was funny for us, but Imsure on the day that the bulletswere flying, it wasnt quite sofunn y. Needless to say, there isdefinitely a lot of h istory w iththis platform.

We saw each of thefour tanker berths where shipshook up to take on the preciouscargo of crude oil. We also got atour of the mess hall, barbershop, recreational lounge, andthe workout Facilities. Beingstuck on the platform formonths at a time (much like

deployment on a ship) can getvery mundane. It was obviousthoug h, that MWR was workinghard to keep morale up and togive everyone there opportuni-ties to relax. Amenities includedtelevision, internet, a recentlyadded basketball goal, a smallcardio center, weight sets, andthe w eekly ice cream socialspent developing camaraderiebetween the different nationsthat protect the platform.

CHAPS, STAT IONED ON ABOT,

EDUCATING HOPPER SAILORS

ABOUT ABOTS HISTORY

ABOT TOURS Written by FC1 CootsI N S I D E T H I S

I S S U E :

PROMOTION 2

NAVY

TRADITION

2

ABOT R&A 3

MW R 4

CASINO NIGHT 5

SRF-B 6

SPORTS

CAPSULE

7

FITNESS 7

HAI L & FARE-

W ELL

8

FIGHTING FORFREEDOM

8

CELEBRITY

GOSSIP

9

MILITARY

NEW S

9

HOROSCOPES 10

ESW S

W ARRIORS

11

HOPPER

MARATHON

11

CMC NO TE 12

PICTURE

CAPTION

13

SATIRE 13

E D I T O R A T L AR G E :

I T 2 ( S W ) L A N G ST O N

AMAZING SCUTTLEBUTT1 5 D E C E M B E R 2 0 0 9V O L U M E 0 9 , I S S U E 0 3


2/13

P A G E 2

GSM1 Santillian

OS1 Scott

DC2Avery

IT2 Langston

CTT2 Steward

FC2 Weyant

STG2 Merriweather

CS2 Reed

CTT3 Groo

OS3 Lindsay

OS3 Miller

CTT3 Romero

CTT3 Cartelli

YN3 Bonnet

EM3 Calvert

GSM3 Mullican

STG3 Mucklow

SH3 Olis

06DEC2009 IS A

DAY 18 SAILO RS

W ILL NEVER

FORGET...

A Navy Tr a dit ion W r it ten by st g 3 ha l l

18 SAILORS PROMOTED Story Provided By LTJGBURKHARTEighteen Petty Officers were

selected for advancement in the lastcycle. This high number of promo-tions demonstrates the high qualityof Sailors on HOPPER.

Petty Officer has marked thespecialists of the ships companysince the days of sail. The first PettyOfficers in the US Navy served onthe USS CONSTI TUTI ON ,UNI TED STATES, and CON-STELLATION. Each Captainappointed one Captain's Clerk, twoBoatswain's Mates, a Coxswain, aSailmaker's Mate, two Gunner'sMates, one Yeoman of the GunRoom, nine Quarter Gunners, twoCarpenter's Mates, an Armorer, aSteward, a Cooper, a Master-at-Arms, and a Cook. Only four ofthese rates correlate to the 11 differ-

ent rates in which HOPPERs Sail-ors were advanced.

Before being frocked, Sailorsmust attend a Petty Officer Indoc-trination course. This course is led

by First Class Petty Officers andincludes instruction on leadershipand responsibility. Being a pettyofficer insinuates a higher level ofknowledge and abili ty. Junior Sail -ors look to Petty Officers in theirrespective ranks for answers andprofessional leadership.

The course is designed to pre-pare young Petty Officers for thechallenges they might face in a newleadership role and how to deal witheach situation appropriately andprofessionally. Not only do theynow have more authority, but theyare responsible for taking care of

each other and junior sailors. It is aright of passage and a proud mo-ment in many sailors lives.

ing Policy has been in

effect, may know what a

Fools Errand is. However

for less salty sailors

and even newer sailors,

such as my self, the tra-

dition of Fools Errands

was a right of passage so

to speak. It was a way of

welcoming a junior sailor

into their new ship boardfamily. These often harm-

less and comical errands

were commonly sending the

new sailor on a task that

is impossible to complete

due to the equipment not

requiring those specific

parts. They also may con-

tain any of the following

but are not limited to:

impossible items, machin-

ery parts that sound real

(yet due to the nature of

the machine can not be),

fetching a quantity of

something that can not be

contained, imaginarythings.

The most commonly known

Fools Errand is sending

the newest sailor of the

division to stand the

Mail Buoy Watch. Other

not so commonly know are

sending someone to the

chiefs mess to turn off

their lights when darken

ship is piped, finding

the charger for the

sound powered telephone

batteries, and Basin

Trials (which consisted

of getting junior sail-

ors to watch the basins

in the head for any

leaks prior to deploy-

ment.) Other not so safeerrands included re-

charging escape arrows

with a torch and sending

a sailor to pilot a

missile. This by the way

is just one more reason

for the Navy to have a

Hazing Policy.

Realizing that for the

most part this tradition

was done in good humor

on long deployments, I

feel it is my duty to

inform you that the Navy

left a specific event in

which this is not con-sidered Hazing. So if

you are feeling left out

just remember there is

always WOG day.

With Thanksgiving just

behind us and Christmas

just around the corner,

I have spent a great

deal of time remember-

ing traditions from my

past. I have also been

in deep contemplation

about things I am

grateful for. Amongst

the top ten things I amgrateful for is the

Navys Hazing Policy,

thus the absence of

Fools Errands. Senior

sailors, that have been

in longer than the Haz-

ENS

MARTELL CAN TELL YOU

ALL ABOUT T HE MAIL

BUOY W ATCH!!!

A M A Z I N G S C U T T L E B U T T

PHOTO BY YN2 TETREAU


3/13

P A G E 3V O L U M E 0 9 , I S S U E 0 3

The group of 11 Sailors that makeup the Rescue and Assistance Teamare trained to provide assistance toother ships, including merchantvessels in distress. This can be fora fire, flooding, or medical issue,explains Damage Controlman ChiefPetty Officer Joseph Montenero,HopperDamage Control TrainingTeam Coordinator. But the possibil-ity of a fire on ABOT is very realistic,so it is important that we think out-side the box and train to this situa-tion.

Throughout the drill and afterward,the Hopper Training Team offeredguidance to the Coalition Forces tobetter enable them to handle a dam-age control situation on the platform.They discussed proper communica-tions between the team members,proper responses, and proceduresto contain a casualty.

This exercise is a building block forestablishing how a naval unit con-ducting perimeter defense dutiescan assist in the damage controleffort, said Commander Timothy

Kott, Hoppers Commanding Officer.A ships ability to augment a crisis iscritical, and that is what we re-hearsed today.

The combined drill was the first ofits kind on the Oil Platform, but itformed the foudation for continueddrills and improved crisis responseproceedures. We brought some-thing that we live by day to day onnavy ships to ABOT Damage Con-trol is everyones responsibility!declared Montenero.

Al Basra Oil Terminal, Iraq The Sailors of the Arleigh Burke-class guided-missile destroyer USSHopper (DDG 70) conducted a jointdamage control drill yesterday withthe Task Force Iraqi Maritime (TF-IM) forces on the Al Bara Oi l Termi-nal (ABOT).

USS Hopper is assigned to TaskForce Iraqi Maritime as a picketunit for the perimeter defense of AlBasra Oil Terminal (ABOT). The oilplatform is run by Southern Oil Com-pany of Iraq, and facilitates export ofmillions of gallons of crude oil a day

from inland Iraq. ABOT is home toCoalition forces which comprise TF-IM as well as Iraqi Military Forcesand civilian support.

Hoppers Damage Control TrainingTeam simulated a material fire in aberthing compartment, and usedprops to indicate it grew out of con-trol. Hoppers Rescue and Assis-tance Team was called into actionand arrived at ABOT via small boatwith fire fighting equipment to renderassistance to fight and contain thefire.

With cooperation between Hoppersteam, the Coalition forces that ini-tially responded to the fire, and theSouthern Oil Company personnelwho control the installed fire fightingequipment, the fire was put out.

During the whole evolution, bothsides worked together and commu-nicated well to ensure success, saidEnsign Jessica Fitzgerald, HoppersRepair Officer and Rescue and As-sistance Team Officer in Charge(OIC).

US Sailors Practice Fire Fighting with Coalition

Forces on Iraqi Oil Platform Story Provided By: LTJG BURKHART

This exercise is

a building block

for establishing

how a naval unit

conducting

perimeter

defense duties

can assist in the

damage control

effort, said

Commander

Timothy Kott

Photos Provided By GSMFN FOWLER


4/13

P A G E 4

MW R SCHEDULE

24DEC: ICE CREAM SOCIAL

ON THE MESSDECKS. GAMES

AND KARAOKE WILL BE SETUP ON THE MESSDECKSFOR

THE CREW TO ENJOY WHILE

THE JUDGESMAKE THEIR

ROUNDSTO PICK THE WIN-

NING P-WAY/SPACE FOR

XMASDECORATION CON-

TEST.

25DEC: $1000 BINGO NIGHT!

ANNOUN CE WINN ING DIVI-

SION FOR XMASDECORAT-

ING CONTEST.

27DEC: TUG-O-WAR. 5 MAN

TEAMS. WINN ING TEAMS

WILL RECEIVE A VERY NICEGIFT BASKET FROM SHIP

STORE OR TEAM WILL BE

ABLE TO CHOOSE REVEILLE

SON GSFOR A WEEK!

31DEC: CASINO NIGHT!

AW ESOME PRIZES, M&M

COUNTING COMPETITION,

AND RAFFLES.


DEC2009/ JAN2010

Sun M on Tue Wed Thu Fr i Sat

24

ICE CREAM

SOCIAL

25$1000

BINGO

NIGHT

26

27TUG-O-

WAR

28 29 30 31

CASINO

NIGHT

01FLIGHT

DECK

SOCIAL

02

03GAM E

NIGHT

04 05 06 07 08 09SPADES

TOURNA-

MENT

10HALO

TOURNA-

MENT

11 12 13 14 15 16BINGO!

17EATING

CONTEST

18 19 20 21 22 23CASINO

NIGHT

CURRENT SPADESCHAMPIONS:

OS2 MORGAN & CS1 JAKEL

28NOV

TURKEY BOWL POKER

TOURNAMENT

(LAST 4 STANDING: LT DOYLE, YNC CATANO, GSEC MCDOWELL,

& EMFN HELMAN)

MORALE,

WELFARE&

RECREATION

***ALL EVENTS SUBJECT TO CHANGE DEPENDING ONSHIPSSCHEDULE***


5/13

05DEC09

CASINO

NIGHT!


W INNERS

LEFT: 1ST PLACE WI

NER - EMFN HELMAWINSAN IPOD TOUC

BELOW: STG2 MERRWEATHER WINSA

CAMERA AND MEMORY CARD

BOTTOM: CS2 MENDOZA IS THE FIRST TLOSE ALL HIS CHIPS

POKER, BLACK JACK,ROULETTE, CRAPS,ROCK/PAPER/SCISSORS


6/13

P A G E 6

I THINK CHIEF

CHRISTMAN, ANDUS AS TRAINERS

BEING ABLE TOCONNECT TO THE

STUDENTS AND

GETTING THEIRATTENTION HAS

PAID FOR GREATLYDUE TO THE FACT

THAT THE HOPPERWAS AWARDED

THE BEST ATFP SHIPFOR THE PACIFIC

FLEET. WEVE GOT

A PLAQUE ON THE

MESSDECKS TOPROVE IT!

- GM1 MASAOY

SHIPS REACTION FORCEBASICINTERVIEWER: IT2 LANGSTON

INTERVIEWEE: GM1 MASAOY

What is SRF-B for? What are the

objectives behind it?

ASC/SRF-B STANDS FOR ARMED SENTRY

COURSE/SHIPS REACTION FORCE-BASIC.

THE ASC/SRF-B IS A MODULARIZED TRAIN-

ING SOLUTION FOR SHIPBOARD SECURITY

FORCES. THIS SOLUTION TRAINS ARMED

SENTRIES IN BASIC WATCHSTANDINGTACTICS AND PROCEDURES WITH FUR-

THER SPECIALIZED TRAINING FOR BASIC

SECURITY REACTION FORCE (RF) TEAM

MEMBERS. STUDENTS WILL RECEIVE

CLASSROOM AND HANDS ON INS TRUC-

TION IN NON-LETHAL WEAPONS (Module 1),

WEAPONS FAMILIARIZATION (Module 2),

WATCHSTANDING SKILLS(Module 3), AND

SHIPS REACTION FORCE-BASIC(Module 4).

ARMED SENTRY COURSE (ASC) - THE ASC

PORTION CONTAINS THESE THREE MOD-

ULES:

NON-LETHAL WEAPONS - THIS MODULE

INCLUDES OPEN HAND TECHNIQUES, USEOF A BATON, OLEORESIN CAPSICUM (OC)

SPRAY, AND FAMILIARIZATION WITH THEUSE OF FORCE CONTINUUM.

WEAPONS FAMILIARIZAION - THIS MOD-

ULE CONTAINS FAMILIARIZATION AND

WEAPONS QUALIFICATION TRAINING FOR

THE 9MM PISTOL, RIFLE, AND SHOTGUN.

WATCHSTANDING SKILLS - THIS MODULE

CONSISTS OF SKILLSETS FOR ALL ARMED

WATCHSTANDERS TO INCLUDE: WARNINGSHOTS, IMPROVISED EXPLOSIVE DEVICES

(IEDS), WATCHSTANDING, AND VEHICLE,

PERSONNEL AND BAGGAGE INSPECTIONS.

SECURITY REACTION FORCE BASIC (SRF-B)

- THE SRF-B PORTION

CONTAINS ONE MODULE:

SRF-B - CONSISTS OF BASELINE TACTICS

AND COMMUNICATIONS TRAINING FOR

SECURITY REACTION FORCE (SRF)/BACKUP

REACTION FORCE (BRF) TEAM MEMBERS

What will some sailors who have not

attended SRF-B expect to learn

from this course?

ASC/SRF-B IS A CRITICAL STEP IN PROVID-ING OUR SAILORS WITH

THE RIGHT SKILLS TO PROTECT OUR SHIPS

AND TO MAKE ATFP A CORE

COMPETENCY THROUGHOUT THE FLEET.

IT GIVES OUR SAILORS THE REQUISITE

KNOWLEDGE TO TEACH AND MAINTAIN

SKILLS REQUIRED FOR ALL ARMED

SENTRIES, AND THE MODULARIZED SOLU-TION TO GIVE THE RIGHT TRAINING,

TO THE RIGHT SAILOR, AT THE RIGHT

TIME.

What are some pre-requisites for

taking this class?

* THE ONLY PRE-REQS FOR THIS CLASS

ARE AS FOLLOWS:

NO DOMESTIC VIOLENCE CONVIC TIONS

PHYSICALLY FIT/HAS PASSED LAST PFA

NO LIGHT DUTY

MY PERSONAL PRE-REQ IS THAT I RUN ITTHROUGH THE GOAT LOCKER FIRST TO

ENSURE THAT THEY UNDERSTAND THEIR

SAILOR IS GOING TO BE IN A SCHOOL, &

THAT THE SAILOR KNOWS ITS A SCHOOL.

ITS NOT TRAINING IN THE CLASSROOM.

THIS IS A SCHOOL WITH A FINAL TEST AND

ALL STUDENTS WILL RECIEVE GRADUA-TION CERTIFICATES. ONE THING I CANTSTAND IS WHEN THEY HAVE SOME SORRY

EXCUSE SAYING THEY CANT BE IN CLASS

BECAUSE THEY HAVE TO DO THIS..OR DO

THAT, OR SOMEONE IN THEIR CHAIN OF

COMMAND COMES IN THE CLASSROOM

AND TELLS THEM THEYVE GOTTA TAKE

CARE OF SOMETHING. SCREW THAT!

BEING UNDERWAY, I CAN UNDERSTAND

WATCHSTANDING. THIS IS WHY THE

COURSE IS TAUGHT THE SAME TOPIC TWO

NIGHTS IN A ROW. AND THE REASON IT

TAKES SO LONG TO FINISH. CENTER FORSECURITY FORCES TEACHES THIS ASHORE

AS A 3 WEEK/8 HR A DAY COURSE. DO THE

MATH. I SUCK AT MATH, SO I WONT DO

IT!

THIS CLASS IS HOWEVER A PRE-REQ FOR

SRF-A (SHIPS REACTION FORCE-

ADVANCED), AND VBSS. BOTH THESE

COURSES ARE TAUGHT ASHORE AT CEN-SECFOR ON FORD ISLAND.

What are some of the hand-on

training that the class does?

I TRY TO GIVE HANDS ON TRAINING IN

THIS CLASS AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE. AS

ENTERTAINING AS I AM, ILL ADMIT THATTHE POWER POINTS GET REALLY DRY AND

BORING! EVERYONE HAS DIFFERENT

WAYS OF LEARNING AND MOST LEARN BY

HANDS ON TRAINING. ILL BREAK OUT

THE WEAPONS & HAVE EVERYONE TAKE

THEM APART & DRY FIRE THEM. YOULL

ALSO SEE THE STUDENTS TACTICAL TEAM

MOVEMENTS THROUGHT THE SHIP. WELLRUN DIFFERENT SCENERIOS WITH THEM

TO GET THEM TO THINK ON HOW TO RE-

ACT/WHATS JUSTIFIED, AND WHAT GIVES

THEM THE BEST TACTICAL ADVANTAGE

OVER ADVERSARIES. AND OF COURSEOUR NON LETHAL WEAPONS PORTION IS

ALL HANDS ON AS FAR AS TEACHING THE

FUNDEMENTALS OF SELF DEFENSE, MACH

TECHNIQUES, USE OF THE BATON, AND

EVERYONES FAVORITEOC!! AND NO

MATTER WHAT ISC COBBS CLAIMS ON

VIDEO, I DIDNT SPRAY HIM IN THE EYESON PURPOSE! I CAN NEITHER CONFIRM

NOR DENY THAT I DID SPRAY ENS MARTEL

IN THE EYES ON PURPOSE! HEY, HES THE

ORDO, IM A GUNNER. SOMETIMES YOU

HAVE TO PROVE A POINT AND LET PEOPLE

KNOW WHO YOU ARE!

What exactly do the sailors learn

from this class and how will they

apply it in the future? (i.e. VBSS)

THEYLL LEARN WHAT I SAID IN THE

ABOVE ANSWERS!! THIS IS JUST A BASIC

COURSE. YOUVE GOTTA CRAWL BEFOREYOU WALK. THIS IS A GATEWAY TO A

BIGGER FORCE PROTECTION AREA. THIS IS

VERY HELPFUL IF A PERSON WANTS TO BE

ON ATTT, ITS MANDATORY FOR SRF-A,

AND SRF-A IS MANDATORY FOR VBSS.

GOING THROUGH THIS COURSE IS PROBA-

BLY THE BEST WAY TO GET FORCE PRO-

TECTION KNOWLEDGE.

What do you, as the trainer, think of

the SRF-B class?

IM THE LEAD ATFP TRASUP ONBOARD.

WELL, BY THE TIME THIS COMES OUT, MA1WILL BE THE ATFP TRASUP! GM2 TERCERO

IS ALSO ONE OF THE TRASUPS & GM2 WIL-

LIAMS IS ALSO A NON LETHAL WEAPONS

INSTRUCTOR ALONG WITH US THREE. I

LOVE TEACHING THIS COURSE. FORCE

PROTECTION IS FUN TO ME. AS A GM, FORCE

PROTECTION IS BASICALLY PART OF OURRATE, SO IVE BEEN AROUND IT MY ENTIRE

CAREER. FOR THE MOST PART, IM GLAD

THAT IM THE ONE GETTING TO TEACH

MOST OF THESE SAILORS WHO HAVE LITTLE

ATFP EXPERIENCE. I WANT TO ESTABLISH

THAT CORE OF FORCE PROTECTION & SHOW

THEM THE RIGHT WAY BEFORE SOMEONE

ELSE FUCKS THEM UP. IDEALLY, ID LIKE TO

HAVE THIS CLASS FOR FULL STRAIGHT 2 - 2

WEEKS INSTEAD OF 2HRS A NIGHT SPAN-

NING OVER A MONTH. BUT ILL TAKE WHAT

I CAN GET. INPORT PH IS THE ONLY TIME ICAN HOLD THOSE CLASSES LIKE THAT.

I THINK CHIEF CHRISTMAN, AND US ASTRAINERS BEING ABLE TO CONNECT TO THE

STUDENTS AND GETTING THEIR A TTENTION

HAS PAID FOR GREATLY DUE TO THE FACT

THAT THE HOPPER WAS AWARDED THE

BEST ATFP SHIP FOR THE PACIFIC FLEE T.

WEVE GOT A PLAQUE ON THE MESSDECKS

TO PROVE IT!

How often do you hold a SRF-B

class?

CLASSES ARE HELD WHEN THERE ARE

ENOUGH STUDENTS TO FILL A CLASS, AND

ESPECIALLY WHEN THE COMMAND CAN

SUPPORT IT. AS BUSY AS THIS COMMAND IS,

ITS A HARD SELL TO CONDUCT THESE

CLASSES AS OFTEN AS WE WOULD LIKE.



7/13

SPORTS CAPSULE WRITTEN BY IT1 ANDREWS


Welcome HOPPER sports fans toanother edition of the Sports Cap-sule. This month saw the wrap up

of the college regu lar season, theNFL playoff picture taking shape,the NBA and NHL in full swing,the MLB winter meetings takingplace, and the World Cup groupdraw taking place.

Starting off w ith college footballth is season saw 5 teams finishundefeated in the course of theseason causing a log jam at thetop of the controversial BCS poll.But after the complicated calculuswas finished Alabama finished theseason ranked # 1, and yes that

hollering you hear is BMC. Theywill play #2 Texas on January 7 th(the 8th our time) for all the mar-bles. The granddaddy of them allwill see one perennial and oneinfrequent player this year as theOhio State, ranked #8, w ill face offwith ou tlandishly clad OregonDucks, ranked #7. The Fiesta Bowlwill host a first for the BCS in hav-ing two schools from non-BCSconferences play in a BCS bowl.#4 TCU will be playing #6 BoiseState. The Big Easy will be watch-ing #3 Cincinnati go against #5

Florida in Tim Tebow s swan song.The last time #9 Georgia Techmade an appearance in the Or-ange Bowl the Vietnam War wasraging and man had not been tothe moon yet. They will play #10Iowa.

The NFL season is entering crunch

time as there are only 4 moregames left. New Orleans andIndianapolis both have survivedscares to keep their unblemishedrecords and have been rewardedwith clenching their respectivedivisions and all but w rapped uphome field advantage. Minnesotastumbled last w eek only for thesecond time but still are in controlof their division . The Cardinals aredominating the weak Westerndivision. The only real race in theNFC comes from the East w ith theEagles and Cowboys tied and theGiants only a game behind. The

Eagles and the Packers hold dow nthe tw o Wild Card spots at thistime in the NFC.

The AFC has a few more closerraces. The Bengals are in thedrivers seat in the North. TheWest sees the Chargers leadingthe Broncos by a game. The Patri-ots also hold a one game lead onthe Dolphins and Jets. The WildCard has the Jaguars and Broncosin if the season ended today.

The NBA is about a quarterthrough the regular season andseparation is beginning to happenwith betw een the haves and havenots. In the West the Lakers, Nug-gets, Mavs, and Suns are dominat-

ing. While in the East the Magic,Celtics, Cavs, and Hawks havebroke away from the pack. The

Nets and T-Wolves are seeing whocan gain the most ping-pong ballsfor th is years lottery.

Most teams in the NHL haveplayed right around the 30 games.Atop the Eastern Conference arethe Capitals (44pts), Devils (41pts),and Penguins (41pts). Way downat the bot tom is the Hurricaneswith a mere 19 points to show fortheir effor ts. The Western Confer-ence is much closer packed withonly the Sharks (43pts) and Ava-lanche (40pts) at or over the 40

point mark and only the Blues(29pts), Wild (29pts), and Ducks(28pts) have not yet reached the30 point mark.

The World Cup draw has beenconducted and the US Nationalteam has a favorable group. Theywill be playing England, Algeria,Slovenia. This grouping makes itexpected for the Nats to make itout of the group stage. June 12thwill mark the first t ime the US andEngland p lay each other in the

World Cup since the Yanksstunned the soccer world w ith a 1-0 win in 1950, in what many say isthe biggest upset in World Cuphistory. The US team has neverfaced Algeria or Slovenia in tour-nament competition before.

CULTURE OF FITNESS WRITTEN BY STG2 KESTER

This monthsaw the wrapup of thecollege regularseason, the NFL

playoff picturetaking shape,the NBA andNHL in fullswing, the MLBw inter meetingstaking place,and the WorldCup groupdraw takingplace.

- IT1 ANDREWS

Ever feel the need to just get away? Need to relieve some built -up stress? Try anew workout routine with Hoppers gym equipment. Run down your stress on a tread-mill. Step your way to a happier you on the stairmaster. Joint pain? No problem, exercisewith low impact on the elliptical. All located in the forw ard pallet staging area. Take arelaxing row in the sonar skid. Maybe even ride your w ay to a healthier you on bicyclesfeatured in several convenient spaces including the starboard vestibules by berthing oneand two, nixie p-way, and the sonar skid. Picture your least favorite person on the speedand heavy bags also located in the forward pallet staging area. Return home looking likeRocky by lifting in the gym or weight t raining on the most improved bowflex . Becomestress free and bring w ellness into your new year w ith the culture of f itness!


8/13

P A G E 8

LT EASTER

ETC WRIGHT

GM1 MASAOY

LT HOERSTER

GM2 TERCERO

GM2 WILLIAMS

DC2 BENDER

HAIL

WE FIGHT FOR FREEDON, WE FIGHT FOR THOSE WHOCANNOT FIGHT FOR THEMSELVES

STORY PROVIDED BY FPO - ENS GERARDO

STUNNING FACTS WRITTEN BY CS2 PERALTAHere are some extremely

weird news and odd funny

facts from all over the

world:

A Sneeze travels out of your

mouth at over 100 mph

You burn more calories sleep-

ing than you do watching Tele-

vision.

An average human loses about

200 head hairs per day

A cow gives nearly 200,000

glasses of milk in her lifetime

In Bahrain, a male gynecolo-

gist can only examine a

womans private parts through

a Mirror

Apples, not caffeine, are more

efficient at waking you up in

the morning

rorism. Pakistan claims it doesnot support t he Afghan Taliban(AT) that has retreated w ithinits borders, ignoring their ob li-gation to reduce terrorism byneutralizing any advancementin planning attacks. Pakistanrefuses to take action in orderto maintain an edge over India.

This needed edge is for theability of persuasion over Af-ghanistan. By allowing the ATto gain momentum w ithin itsborders, Pakistan is allow ing thepossibility of the AT to over-throw Afghanistan when it isstrong enough, leading to Paki-stani expansion and fear in themind of India, ultimately re-straining Ind ia from fu ll expan-sion itself. Indias current ex-pansion comes in the form ofpositive developmental aid andfunding of infrastructural pro-jects to ensure the country isable to stand up on its own;

aiding the United States cur-rent battle in Afghanistan.Unfortunately, what seems likea good deed on Indias part isviewed as a means of destabili-zation for Pakistan. Everyone isentitled to their own opinion,but w hen that opinion allowsfor the momentum and increas-ing strength of terrorism, there

The count ries thatcompose the Middle East havebeen a constant reminder tothe government of issues thatare more important than howmany sections were in andhow long we w ill be away fromour families. These issues in-clude topics such as terrorism,

governmental infrastructurestability, and global economicalstability. Many times it is ourcitizens that believe these issuesare being absorbed solely bythe United States or that w e willbe most affected by the out-comes in the region. This maybe a point of b itterness forsome, but what is not readilyacknow ledged by all is how theregions count ries are alreadyand w ill continue to be af-fected. Afghanistan, much toits chagrin, has become a focalpoint due to it being an everincreasing tension point be-

tw een two opposing countr ies,India and Pakistan.

While these tw ocountries have stayed on theoutskirts of the public eye, thesurmount ing tension betw eenthem has shed light on a pointof w eakness to resolving someMidd le East issues. This weak-ness comes in the form of ter-

are others who w ill be affectednot on ly in the form of localattacks but also from the cas-cading problems that comefrom the dynamic responses.The balance between Indiasaid and Pakistans harboringdetrimental forces has leveledto be in a state of equilibrium,

but for how long? If the Af-ghan government is over-thrown by the AT, what w ouldbe the repercussions? Can weexpect our economy to con-tinue to be in a state of perilwith little hope of ever regain-ing its stature due to our expor-tation of monetary funds?There is no cookie cutter plan ofaction that will resolve this re-gions many issues and becauseof that it t ruly seems that therereally is no means to an end inany countrys involvement,small or large, in the MiddleEast. But we continue our per-

sistence to fight for what webelieve, to fight for mans inher-ent right to freedom. We needto remember that w e are herefor a greater purpose that maynot always seem readily appar-ent, but that is desperatelyneeded to maintain equilibriumand dissuade terror ism.

CTT3 GROO

FC3 HALL

BM3 RIOS


FAREW ELL

Information provided byPS2 Saeturn


9/13

CELEBRITY GOSSIP... WRITTEN BY IT1 MASON


Reese Witherspoon andJake Gyllenhall call it quits.

The couple who have beentogether since 2007 havesplit, a source close to theactress states. Not too manydetails were given on thereason for the spilt. Oneminute they are moving inwith each other, the next theysplit. Hopefully they will getback together. They aresuch a cute couple.

Lejeunes 1/ 6 to lead Afgan surge

Camp Lejeunes infantry battalion will be thefirst U.S. unit to deploy to Afghanistan duringthe next six month. They will be part of theadditional 30,000 troops to head over to theregion. According to Marine officials at thePentagon the first un til w ill deploy beforeChristmas. Marine officials did not elaborate onthe other un its that w ill deploy, however de-ployment orders are to be expected soon.

WOMAN ARRESTED FOR

TAPING NEW MOON

Samantha Tumpach in Chicago isfacing up to three years in prison forfilming th ree minutes of The TwilightSaga: New Moon. She claims shehad not intent ions of pirating themovie; she w as filming her sisterssurprise 29th birthday party. Alsoincluded on the f ilm were her rela-tives singing Happy Birthday in thetheater. She also has some previewson her camera, however she states

that the camera is new and she wasjust playing around w ith it beforeher sister w alked in. She has alreadyspent two days in the slammer forthe incident, wh ich should be

enough.

MILITARY NEWS WRITTEN BY IT1 MASON

He trained

everyday for

four months

with Master

Wu, who is

the films

fight

coordinator.

First Look: The Next KarateKid

Jaden Smith, who is the son offamed Actor Will Smith, will startas the Next Karate Kid. Theboys got chops! He learned themoves of a true martial artsfighter. He trained everyday forfour months with Master Wu,who is the films fight coordina-tor. He will star opposite JackieChan in the 1984 classic remakeof The Karate Kid, which is duein theaters June 11.

TAYLOR LAUTNER GETSMOBBED BY JAMIE FOXX

Just when you think the screamingtweens were going crazy over NewMoon star Taylor Lautner, JamieFoxx joins them as his biggest fan.Foxx admits that both he and hisdaughter are Lautners biggest fans.Foxx asked for a picture, Lautnerwas like Are you kidding me, Can Iget a picture w ith you?

Sailors can switch, advance faster in

ArmyMore than 2,600 sailors will be sent home thisyear due to high-year tenure, and another1,200 through re-enlistment disapproval. Formost sailors, the chances of fin ishing an activeNavy career are over. But there is hope, sailorscan switch to the Army and have the chance tostay active, obtain a new specialty, advance muchfaster and reti re. The Armys Blue to Green programmay be the way to for some sailors who have thedesire to continue serving their country. For somesailors, the Coast Guard is also an option, and may bemore appealing than the Armys program.

Deployments are harder on girls

Military children are having more problems, the moretimes their military parents are deployed. The prob-lems increase with older youths and gi rls of all ages.The girls report more difficulties with family, schooland peers. About 30 percent of mil itary children in anew study reported elevated anxiety symptoms, in-cluding the need to be evaluated for anxiety disor-ders. The children in the study suffered more emo-tional diff iculties compared to national research. Wi ththe troop increase for Afghanistan, more children w illbegin to suffer some form of anxiety.


10/13

P A G E 1 0

HOROSCOPES BY IT2 FIORELLOA R I E S

Work is very rewarding thismonth, dear Aries, yet you stillmanage to find w ays to b reak

the rout ine. You are very busylooking over the horizons,whether its through night visiongoggles or big eyes. Decemberpresents a nice balance of recogni-

tion and accomplishment, as wellas recreation and love. A stellarromantic opportun ity occurs onthe 4-6, to bad youll still be outto sea.

T A U R U S

Sharing, intimacy, finances, andpower plays all figure strongly

for you in December. In the firstthree w eeks of the month , youare thinking strategically, plot-ting charts, and the large screendisplays. You stand to gainmuch from your observations,those little circles, squares andtriangles mean something tosomebody.

Gemin i

Balancing your needs withthose of a significant otherinvolves plenty of negotiatingand back-and-forth before arriv-

ing at any conclusions. Timeslike these require a certainamount of tact and a need tolet others take center stage forthe t ime being. A loan or repay-ment is likely to make headlinesfor you tow ards the end ofDecember; so make sure thatlooser pays up from the pokertourney.

C A N C E R

You simply cant wait until theNew Year to begin fulfilling yourresolutions regarding health,fitness, and lifestyle changes,dear Cancer. The t ime is now !But w ait, the PRT is over soyouve got five and a halfmonths before you follow thruwith the resolutions. After allwho sticks with th ose thingsany way.

L E O

The first three weeks of Decem-ber are exciting and stimulatingfor you , dear Leo. You havespecial magnet ic appeal, extraenergy, and a real yen for ex-

citement now , which is mostlyin your head because you justdrank and double jack and cokeafter drying out for 44 days.Creative Leos will be on a roll,so hit the dance floor and dothe stanky leg, the next portvisit isnt until February.

V I R G O

A scurry of activity in andaround the home or with familyis in store for you this month,dear Virgo. So keep a close eye

on those credit card b ills. Tisthe season to be thrift y, but nota scrooge.

L ib ra

An especially busy mostly pleas-antly so period is in store for youin the first three weeks of De-cember, dear Libra. It can get alittle hectic, w ith many dustbunnies to catch, more sharp-shipping than you can realisti-cally accomplish, but at leastthere is plenty of contact w ithfriends in the p-ways. Its a time

of netw orking, and youre com-ing across very smoothly, on the

slick deck.

S C O R P I O

In many ways, December is amoney month for you, dearScorpio. You enjoy extra energyand enthusiasm for increasingyour income. Its an excellentopportunity period for a bonus

round ofbingo. If youre waitingfor money in the form of a loanor repayment of a debt to you,

its likely to arrive around theFull Moon on the 12th as longas youre willing to accept chip-to-chip.

Capr ico rn

While others are racing aroundyou, preparing for the holidays,you are enjoying a sense of

peace; hump day is almost here.The last week of the monthbegins a power period that youtake with you into the NewYear. Tremendous energy and

initiative is with you as youembark on a journey of internalchange and personal discovery.It feels like you can move moun-tains, keep that feeling becauseyour gonna need it in the nextfew months.

Aquar ius

December is ripe with opportu-nity for envisioning new pro-jects and goals for your future,dear Aquarius. Friends, ac-quaintances, and PB4Ts willcertainly keep you busy. Ro-

mance, however, is completelyout of t he question. Its a mostlyeasy mont h, save for some im-pulsive energy mid-month,when overspending or specula-tion could be costly.

Pisces

In most ways, December is ahigh prof ile month for you, dearPisces, except for on a romanticlevel, which is satisfyingly pri-vate. You may be pu t in chargeof a private matter. Secrets arerevealed and revealing. But its

cool, you need to air out all of theold secrets to make room fornew ones!! The 12-16 is espe-cially fortunate for w ork;. yourwork is recognized and re-warded, you come across asespecially competent, and youexperience a professional peakof sorts. Those new crows feelheavy dont they.

Sagi t tar ius

Energy, verve, andconfidence are withyou th is month, dearSagittarius, until thelast w eek of the monthwhen your life windsdown, quite appropri-ately! Until then, its

hustle and bustle, andmatters are definitelyworking in your favor.The mountain of PQSsyou thought werenever going to end areslowly dwindling, butstay vigilant, theywont sign themselves.



11/13

P A G E 1 1

CONGRATULATIONS

TO OUR NEW EST

ENLISTED SURFACE

W ARFARE

SPECIALISTS!

HOPPER MARATHON INFORMATION PROVIDED BY CS1(SW) JACKSON

Whered That Come From? Written By MPO- ENS BICKINGS

Side Boys: Some officers,particularly those of higherrank, would gain consider-able body weight in their

later years. This made com-ing aboard a ship a particu-larly strenuous activity. So,the side boys had the job ofhauling the short-o-breathofficer inboard if he haddifficulties.

Carry On: In the days of sail,the officer of the deck kept aweather eye constantly onthe slightest change in thewind so sail could be added

as necessary to ensure thefastest headway. Whenevera good breeze came along ,the order to carry onwould be given. It meant tohoist every bit of canvas theyards could carry. Today,the term means to continuewith your work.

Son of a Gun: When in port,and w ith the crew restrictedto the ship for any extendedperiod of time, wives andladies of easy virtue wereoften allowed to live aboardwith the crew. Undoubt-

edly, children w ere bornaboard and a convenientplace for this was betw eenguns on the gun deck. If thechild's father was unknown,they were entered in theship's log as "son of a gun".

No Room to Swing a Cat:The entire ship's companywas required to witnessflogging at close hand. Thecrew might crowd aroundso that the Bosun's Matemight not have enoughroom to sw ing h is cat o'nine tails.

1. FCC STEWART - 34971.0 CALORIES

2. OS1 BOYCE - 25495.76 CALORIES

3. CS1 JACKSON - 20906.3 CALORIES

4. STG2 BRANDON - 18509.4 CALORIES

5. CS3 STEARNS - 16195.0 CALORIES

6. STG2 KESTER - 11485.6 CALORIES

7. OS1 BELLARD - 5418.0 CALORIES

8. CMC STUCKEY - 4433.3 CALORIES

9. FC2 SEYMOUR - 3626.0 CALORIES

10. STG2 WEIDLICH - 3197.0 CALORIES


Photos by YN2 Tetreau

QM3(SW) DYE

EN2(SW) ILES

CTT3(SW) CARTELLI


12/13

N OT E F R OM T H E COM M AN D M AST E R CH I E F

P A G E 1 2V O L U M E 0 9 , I S S U E 0 3

A Sailor's Christmas

Twas the night before

Christmas, the ship was

out steaming, Sailors

stood watch while others

were dreaming.

They lived in a crowd

with racks tight and

small, In a 80-man

berthing, cramped one

and all.

I had come down thestack with presents to

give, And to see inside

just who might perhaps

live.

I looked all about, a

strange sight did I see,

No tinsel, no presents,

not even a tree.

No stockings were hung,

shined boots close at

hand, On the bulkhead

hung pictures of a far

distant land.

They had medals and

badges and awards of all

kind, And a sober

thought came into my

mind.

For this place was dif-

ferent, so dark and so

dreary, I had found thehouse of a Sailor, once

I saw clearly.

A Sailor lay sleeping,

silent and alone, Curled

up in a rack and dream-

ing of home.

The face was so gentle,

the room squared away,

This was the United

States Sailor today.

This was the hero I saw

on TV,

Defending our country so

we could be free.

I realized the families

that I would visit this

night, Owed their lives

to these Sailors lay

willing to fight.

Soon round the world,

the children would play,

And grownups would cele-

brate on Christmas Day.

They all enjoyed freedom

each day of the year,

Because of the Sailor,

like the one lying here.

I couldn't help wonderhow many lay alone, On a

cold Christmas Eve on a

sea, far from home.

The very thought brought

a tear to my eye, I

dropped to my knees and

started to cry.

The Sailor awakened and

I heard a calm voice,

"Santa, don't cry, this

life is my choice."

"Defending the seas all

days of the year, So

others may live and be

free with no fear."

I thought for a moment,

what a difficult road,

To live a life guided by

honor and code.

After all it's Christmas

Eve and the ship's un-

derway!

But freedom isn't free

and it's sailors who

pay.

The Sailor say's to our

country "be free and

sleep tight, No harm

will come, not on my

watch and not on this

night.

The Sailor rolled over

and drifted to sleep, I

couldn't control it, I

continued to weep.

I kept watch for hours,

so silent, so still, I

watched as the Sailor

shivered from the

night's cold chill.

I didn't want to leave

on that cold dark night,

This guardian of honor

so willing to fight.

The Sailor rolled over

and with a voice strong

and sure, Commanded,

"Carry on Santa, It's

Christmas, and All is

Secure!"

HONOR, COURAGE AND COM-

MITMENT

Author unknown! Merry

Christmas

"Defending

the seas

all days of

the year,

So others

may live

and be free

with no

fear."

CMDCM(SW/ AW/ FMF)Stuckey


13/13

8. Seriously, sail boats

man. What would possess

someone to own a sail

boat? The only excuse for

a sail boat is if you're

stranded on a deserted

island like Tom Hanks or

something. If so, then byall means, build a flip-

pin' sail boat.

9. France bashers. Yep,

France bashing actually

annoys me. Not because I

like France or anything,

F#*! those frogs, mainly

because most France bash-

ers are just people igno-

rant of their own his-

tory. France was one of

the only nations to aid

the U.S. during the Revo-

lutionary war. They even

sent soldiers, ever hear

of La Fayette? And it

seems ironic that so many

people go all out to

celebrate Cinco de Mayo

(one of Mexico's victo-

ries over France), as

well as Independence day,

which was greatly influ-

(...CONTINUED)

6. That piece of plastic on

the side of push lawn-

mowers. You know that

thing you use to blow all

the grass trimmings into

your neighbor's yard?

That thing was invented

out of pure malice.

7. Shock value annoys me.

Whether it's art, or en-

tertainment, or just a

joke. It's just taking

the easy way out to

elicit a reaction. There

is no "greater purpose"

involved in saying or do-

ing something way over

the top just because you

know that somebody out

there is gonna freak out

about it. It's lazy, it's

immature, it is one of

the many things that is

contributing to the down-

fall of human culture. Oh

funny, you behave ob-

scenely in situations

that don't call for it.

Congratulations!, you're

what's wrong with the

world.

enced by France. Consider

yourself educated, fool.

10. People who pronounce

pecan as "pee-can". I re-

alize that there is no

prescribed pronunciation

but "pee-can" just soundsridiculous. I'm from

Texas, it's our state

tree, and I say its pro-

nounced pecan. Get it

right.

(MORE TO FOLLOW)

Kuper: Does this vest make my

butt look big?- ET3 Crandall

SATIRE WRITTEN BY IT2 SHADDOCK

PICTURE CAPTION

Next Months Picture: VBSSTEAM

editor at large: it2(sw) langston

Documents