F R I E N D S F I R S T

SPOTLIGHT ON… Shirley & Rebecca

In the professional industry, participants have an opportunity to give presentations on a daily basis. Presentations include appearances in small groups, large groups, or a more intimate setting to your superiors.

At some point this process may become easy for those preparing to give speeches, or persuade a client with their special sales pitch. But what impact does a child have when he/she is telling their story in front of a large crowd? If an adult had to read literature and attend a networking event to recruit clients, what difference would it make to read a report versus hearing it from a child who conveys that same message? The answer could be different depending on how people absorb information, whether it is visual, reading, or experiencing it first hand. A few months ago, one of our Friends First matches presented in front of the Mercy Home for Boys and Girls Junior Board. The Junior Board is a team of professionals who collaborate to spread the message to different communities on the work that Mercy Home for Boys and Girls does all over the community. While picking up the mentee, Shirley, I noticed how anxious she was while preparing to present to the Junior Board about her match with Rebecca. Shirley brought a scrapbook, her grandmother, and her excitement. When her name was called to begin her presentation, her smile went away and her eye contact with people decreased. It was a moment when many of us in the audience wanted to get up, help her out and reassure her that everything was going to be OK. Her mentor, Rebecca, lead the initial introduction on how long they’ve been matched and the types of activities they’ve taken part in over the year. As each second and minute went by, Shirley began making small comments, elaborating on their outings and sharing their story. Some comments were two or three word answers which increased in excitement, followed by short pauses. Shirley began smiling more, talking about her match and sharing how fun her mentor is, all while flipping through her scrapbook.

People in the audience laughed, thought their relationship was “cute”, and began asking them questions. By this point, Shirley was on a roll and enjoyed answering questions and coming up with jokes. In the end, the experience of presenting to a complete group of strangers turned out to be amazing for Shirley. Her grandmother was very happy and appreciative for Shirley’s opportunity to share her match story while having a great mentor by her side. To learn about the Friends First program, the Junior Board could easily have read literature or watched a video. But to hear firsthand from Shirley and Rebecca about their match was magical. Members of the Junior Board witnessed how in less than ten minutes, with the support and leadership of a mentor, things can quickly change for the better. The fact that Shirley and Rebecca share a great relationship was very evident and in just 10 minutes, they demonstrated the importance of building the following Developmental Assets:

Having adult relationships and an adult role model

Community values

Service to others

Creative Activities, evidenced by their match outings scrapbook

Lots of caring towards her mentor

Integrity by expressing how mentoring is powerful and important in a youth’s life

Planning and decision making by bringing her scrapbook, and practicing singing and dancing before the presentation.

Cultural competence by describing each other’s culture, upbringing, likes, and dislikes by food, music, or norms.

And most importantly Personal Power, High Self-Esteem, Sense of Purpose, and Positive View of the future.

Shirley and Rebecca remind me of why I enjoy working with matches. When mentors give a little of their time, “coolness”, and ongoing dedication, they make a big difference in the lives of kids. All youth have opinions and ideas that can be truly valuable in the professional world. For Rebecca and Shirley, they showed all of us that day how a special seed can be planted by adults who care for and nurture the next generation of professional leaders. ~ Alberto Paguada

Friends First is a program of Mercy Home for Boys & Girls

www.mercyhome.org

Summer 2011

Mercy Home Records Another First

The Friends First program is proud to say that we now have a mentee that has become a mentor. It was not necessarily in

Michael’s plan to become a mentor when he was first matched in Friends First over twelve years ago. He had his

problems. His mother was disabled and his father was not involved in his life. Like most children, he had difficulties in

school and was susceptible to the vagaries of the streets. The bonding between Michael and his mentor, Joe, was not

immediate. They went through their disagreements and adjustments, and, at times it seemed like the match would end.

The teenage years were a time of unrest and ambivalence for Michael, but his volunteer held firm to his belief that every

child has a right to a better life.

Now, as they look back over their match and see how special it was, Michael and Joe both feel that they did not do

anything unusual. They enjoyed going to museums, walking on the shore, having an occasional piece of pizza, or just

hanging out and talking about life in general. They had their share of laughs and disappointments and they both mention

that the moments they remember the most are centered on the personal events and conversations.

Michael was pushed by his mentor to be a good student and do his homework regularly. He was not always enthusiastic

about doing his work in school, but he was able to complete high school and eventually complete his college degree.

When he saw his country at war, he joined the Marine Corps and is now a veteran of the Iraq and Afghanistan wars.

After leaving active duty, Michael came back to Mercy Home for Boys and Girls and asked to be a mentor through

Friends First. He felt it was his duty to return the good modeling he received from his mentor. He laughs a little when he

visits with his MSR and speaks of his mentee. He realizes that role modeling is not always easy and the problems that he

faced as a youth are now seen in the young man he visits on the weekend. He continues to have a great deal of respect for

the mentor of his childhood. ~ Br. Paul McDonough

Mary Ann’s Moment

Community Service/Youth as Resources Are you active in your community? One sure way to make a difference

where you live is to participate in a neighborhood activity, event, project or

day of service. No matter what your interest or how big or small you care to

go, it still makes a difference to your community. Maybe you like animals

and can volunteer at a local shelter. If you like to play in the park, find out

how you may participate in a volunteer clean up day through the Chicago

Park District or a community center. Many of them also offer free classes to

satisfy a variety of interests where you can be support these programs by

participating while also making new friends.

Perhaps you desire to help others and would be able to visit a nearby

nursing home to provide companionship for an elder who could use a

friend. Take part in a beautification or art project. Whether you stick with

your favorite interests or try something new, you can make a difference in

the lives of those around you just by exploring your community.

Many of Chicago's neighborhoods have websites with event calendars

where you can find fun ways to support your community. If you do not

have access to a computer, your local library will have computers you can

use to search for fun events near you. So get out there and find your fun! ~Mary Ann Pilet

Welcome New Matches!

We are pleased to welcome these new

matches and wish them all the best as they

start an exciting year together:

Anthony W. & TyJuan S….. 3/16

Stephanie L. & Kaylin N….. 4/21

Justin G. & Jeremiah T…… 4/28

Sandy G. & Crystal M……. 5/04

Ali N. & Jessica Z…………. 5/28

Mike B. & Juan N………….. 6/02

Julie F. & Lizbeth A………...6/05

One-Time Opportunities Dinner at Living Room Café Fulton Flower & Vegetable Garden Work Day

Bingo Fun With Seniors

National Multiple Sclerosis Society Slugfest Softball Tournament

St. Columbanus Food Pantry

Where Inspiration Café: 4554 N. Broadway St #207

When Wednesday, July 13, 2001

4:30 to 7:00 p.m.

What Volunteers make dinner and serve it café

style in this fun restaurant atmosphere for

people experiencing homelessness.

Contact Toni Spencer, 773-878-0981

Where Sheridan and Leland CHA

When Tuesday, July 26 6:45 to 8:00 p.m.

What Play bingo with senior Chicago Housing Authority residents.

Contact Sign up at: http://www.chicagocares.org/HOC__Volunteer_Opportunity_Details_Page?

startURL=HOC__Volunteer_Opportunity_Details_Page%3FId=a0CA0000008edzgMAAA@A&id=a0CA0000008edzgMAA

Where Mt. Greenwood Park, Chicago, IL 60655

When Saturday, August 13th 6 a.m. to 7 p.m.

What Volunteers help with set-up, food service, registration, field monitoring, the home run derby, and clean-up.

Contact Elle Ullum at elle.ullum@nmss.org or 312-423-1172

Where 331 E. 71st St. Chicago, IL 60619

When Saturday, August 13th

What Volunteers help to organize, sort and package food for distribution on pantry days.

Contact Patricia Lombardo, 773-224-1022

Summer Volunteer Opportunities

Summer is a great time to get out in the community to volunteer! Many organizations are in need of volunteers for one-

time events or ongoing assistance. Below is a list of opportunities to fit everyone’s interests and schedule. ~ Amanda Sneed

Ongoing Volunteer Opportunities Anti-Cruelty Society’s Teen Volunteer Program 510 N. La Salle St. Contact Erin Kelly, ekelly@anticruelty.org Pet lovers ages 11 to 17 can work with the staff doing animal care, training and first aid. Friends of the Chicago River, ages 6 and up. 312-939-0490 www.chicagoriver.org Volunteer at river cleanup days and assist with canoe and kayak events like the group’s annual Chicago River Flatwater Classic. VITAS Hospice Care 312-997-7200 www.vitas.com VITAS is looking for kind and caring people to help terminally ill patients and their families. Friendly visits, simple errands, providing a listening ear and the gift of friendship at a crucial time can make a real difference in another person’s life. And yours too! VITAS Volunteer orientation is provided free of charge to help you learn the skills required to be an outstanding hospice volunteer. Time and dates are ongoing and flexible.

Where 4427-31 West Fulton Street

When Saturday, July 16, 2011

9:30 am to 12:00 p.m.

What Help tend to the gardens by planting, weeding

and harvesting vegetables that will feed low

income individuals and families.

Contact RSVP to Julie Samuels via e-mail or by phone

at 312-863-6256

Artists of the Wall…

Every year in June there is an event along the lake front in the Rogers Park neighborhood called the Artists of the Wall

Festival. Individuals, families or groups can pay a fee to paint one of the designated spaces along the 600 foot mural at

Loyola Park Beach (paint can also be purchased). The mural is functional, too, as it is a concrete bench facing the lake

front that will delight, amuse and enrich the lives of those who sit upon it for an entire year until it is painted over again

giving the rest of us budding artists an opportunity to express our love of community and add beauty to the

neighborhood. This event can be found at www.rogerspark.com but it is posted for a brief time before the event if you

wish to participate, so check early and often. This year the Artists of the Wall Festival is on Saturday and Sunday, June

18th & 19th from 9 a.m. until dusk. Registration is now closed, but Mercy Home for Boys & Girls’ Friends First

Mentoring Program has a space, so watch for the upcoming photos of our experience. ~ Mary Ann Pilet

Kids in Service Friends First matches went to the Greater Chicago Food Depository

on April 16th for a day of service. Mentor Marissa and mentee

Maria had a great time volunteering and even donated canned goods

to the Food Depository for hungry families.

Happy Anniversary!

July

Colleen H. & Mariyah C…... 7/13

Nathaniel P. & Robert R…... 7/17

Beth B. & Denira C………… 7/27

August

Tom K. & Godofredo N……. 8/04

Chad H. & Jasean P……….. 8/05

Dean K. & Corey W………... 8/05

Les J. & Joey G…………….. 8/15

Kara C. & Jasmine T………. 8/31

September

Stephanie M. & Daphne P… 9/08

Heidi D. & Angelic B………. 9/13

Bree M. & Natjaxi C……….. 9/28

We apologize if we have missed

your birthday. Please let us know

so we can add it to our calendar.

Friends First Focus

Community Service / Youth as Resources The Search Institute (www.search-institute.org)

identifies the importance of giving youth useful

roles and providing service to the community.

Consider how you can include young people when

making decisions, planning events and discussing

community issues. Young people have a lot to

offer and to learn from by being involved. Find

out their passions and concerns and then look for

ways that these can be addressed or for

opportunities for young people to take action.

Friends First Fun! Friends First matches took part in a day of service

at the Greater Chicago Food Depository in April.

Five matches and two staff members attended the

event and assisted in repackaging cereal for

emergency food kits for families. This was a great

event for youth to do service while learning more

about hunger and poverty.

We recently hosted a family day here at Mercy

Home to provide Friends First families with

summer ideas and opportunities for our youth.

The day included yoga, information about free

family events in Chicago, camp registration, ideas

for healthy snacks and a springtime party. Friends

First wishes everyone a safe, healthy and happy

summer!

Friends First News Our own Br. Paul McDonough threw out the first

pitch at the Cubs Game in April. He was

introduced as “Mercy Home for Boys and Girls,

Br. Paul McDonough.” Before the beginning of

the game, Br. Paul walked out to the mount, tipped

his hat and pitched all the way to the plate, with a

little bounce just before. Friends First is very

proud to have such a celebrity in our midst. ~ Mary Quinn

Friends First Tidbits Look for volunteer opportunities for

the young people in your life by

visiting:

www.chicagosfoodbank.org

www.chicagocares.org

www.volunteermatch.org

Happy Birthday!!

July

Jeremiah T………………… 7/12

Carlos C. ………………….. 7/29

Jordan D…………………... 7/30

Elijah M…………………… 7/31

August

Crystal M………………….. 8/01

Godofredo N………………. 8/10

Monique W………………... 8/15

Desiree C……………………8/17

Mariyah C…………………. 8/17

Nancy V……………………. 8/18

Jabree G…………………… 8/29

Dejah J…………………….. 8/31

Sept

David M……………………. 9/01

Joey G……………………… 9/13

Shirley W………………….. 9/13

We apologize if we have missed your birthday. Please

let us know so we can add it to our calendar.

Be of Service...

From the Diary of Anne Frank:

“Give of yourself, give as much as you can!

And you can always give something, even if

it is only kindness! If everyone were to do

this, then there would be much more justice

and love in the world. “

“Give and you shall receive, much more

than you would have ever thought possible.

Give, give again and again, and don’t lose

courage, keep it up and go on giving! No

one has ever become poor by giving.”

We love your match stories so please keep

sharing them with us!

Thoughts that Make You Go “Hmmm?”

F R I E N D S F I R S T A newsletter dedicated to building and supporting the Friends First community of Mercy Home for Boys & Girls. For more information, please call (312) 738-7552 or visit www.mercyhome.org.

F R I E N D S F I R S T

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“Our inner strengths, experiences, and truths cannot be lost, destroyed, or taken away. Every person has an

inborn worth and can contribute to the human community. We all can treat one another with dignity and respect,

provide opportunities to grow toward our fullest lives and help one another discover and develop our unique gifts.

We each deserve this and we all can extend it to others.” “Responsibility does not only lie with the leaders of our

countries or with those who have been appointed or elected to do a particular job. It lies with each of us

individually. Peace, for example, starts within each one of us. When we have inner peace, we can be at peace with

those around us. When our community is in a state of peace, it can share that peace with neighboring communities,

and so on.” ~ Dalai Lama

“When I help, I am aware of my strength and of others’ weaknesses…Fixing is a form of judgment. It implies

something is broken and creates a distance, a disconnection. We can only serve that which we are profoundly

connected to.” ~ Sam Daley-Harris

“If you have come to help me, you are wasting your time. But if you have come because your liberation is bound

up with mine, then let us work together.” ~ An aboriginal Australian woman

“I don't know what your destiny will be, but one thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy

are those who will have sought and found how to serve.” ~ Albert Schweitzer