"The Blessings of Government, Like the Dews from Heaven, Should Descend Alike upon the Rich and the Poor."

. G. TZEL, Editor. COVINGTON, ST. TAMMANY PARISH. LA., JUNE 7, 1884. VOL. X.-NO. 23

THE HIIITTLE&Ills knife is an old-fashioned one-the blade is

of the kindThat, while with eae t cuts new cheese, itsedge turns on the rind.And It bears the old-time falsehood that so

many old knives tell.The prehistoric rebus in the letters "I' ."The spring is worn and shortened, and the

blade, wLih backward leans,Oft closeson the fingers when opening sar-hdines;

Though 'tis worthless yet the owner of itsmerits much cloth blow,

And wants some "boot" when askel to trade- -he at least should get the toe.

The whittler sits and whistles, when theweather will permit,

On a tds box on the pavement, where helos-eth much to sit,And he talketh of the tariff to a friend from

up the pik,.While hSI sihavings and his arguments are

valuable alike.

In the southwest the whittler in the most per-fecti:n blooms.

And he carveth strips of poplar and the han-dles of old brooms;

He hath no Ingenuity and couldn't make a

If the penalty for failure was the loss of hisright leg.

The policeman poses near the middle of thestreet

And whittles very solemnly, quite deaf topassing feet;

You'd think his mighty brain upheld the landon even's brink-

He's thinking, very probably, where next he'lget a drink.

In this section, where horse trading is anevery-day affair

And the young men have a mania for tradingeverywhere,

This whittling serves a purpose, for thetraders, bound to lie,.

Hate to look each other honestlyand squarelyin the eye.

And so at night in circles where the idlerloves to sit

And listen to horse arguments and question-able wit,

Something like this you'll hear at times: "BillGriggs, who shot Jim Gray,

Got whittled outen that black mar' he's hadso long, to-day."-- rrmtenas Mir. in X. Y. Mereary.

A PERILOUS ADVENTURE.

a-gineerlarg ea the Plaies FifteenWears Ageo-eat ef Elward SCehuler-- Graphic Stery ef hDeager anld Coeaage.The kindness of a kinsman of the late

Howard Schuyler has furnished us withthe following interesting story of theperils of engineering life on the Plainsonly fifteen years ago:

*"In a recent letter from - he in-forms me of your request that I shouldwrite out an detail thestorv of Howard'smiriculous escape from the Indians, asI had narrated it to you. If it is amatter of interest to you, it will certainlybe a pleasure to me so to do.

"In the month of June, 1869. whenthe grass and flowers on the plains of.Kansas and Colorado were nearly knee-high, the result of unusually abundantrains, which lefeclear pools of water inall the little arroyos, a corps of KansasPacific engineers under the leadershipat Howard Schuyler, were engaged inmaking certain preliminary surveys inthe vicinity of the terminal town pJPhil Sheridan, near the border line dthe two States. They had been out ona trip of several months in the directionof Denver, and had returned to the endof the track to begin the definite loca-tion, which we afterward carriedthrough to Denver. At this time I hadbeen with the party some two or threemonths, taking my novitiate in engi-neering, and was occupying the posi-tion of rodman. Prior to commencingthe location, we were running somerapid trial lines north of Sheridan, andby the 19th of June were some fifteenor twenty miles out in a roll-ing country, where the headsof the Smoky Hill and Republi-can Forks of the Kansas River inter-lock. On the evening before our camphad been brought up to the end of ourwork, and we started out bright andearly on this memorable Saturdaymorning, so that by ten o'clock wewere several miles away from camp.In all our work we had been accom-panied by an escort of fifteen infantrysoldiers, under the charge of a Lieuten-ant, acting in the capacity of a camp-guard, who, while they were very usefulin guarding our base of supplies, wereof no protection to us in the field. Ourparty numbered thirteen all told, twoof whom remained in camp as cook andteamster. The working party wastherefore reduced to eleven, includingHoward, whose custom it was to rideseveral miles ahead, looking out theline and indicating it by building sodmounds two or three feet high with ashovel. We followed from one moundto the next, measuring angles and dis-tances and leveling the ground. Ourprogress was as rapid almost as a manwou'd walk at a moderate pace, andwe were exceedingly vulnerable to at-tack, as we were all separated, strungout over a distancsof a mile or more,while Howard was always out of sightand several miles abead, but havingbeen out several months without seeingany Indian signs we had no suspicionof danger and did not dream therewere any Indians in the country. Weafterwards knew that they had beenwatching us some days andwere simplywaiting for the most favorable oppor-tunity to make the attack, having evi-dently planned to kill Howard first andthen come back along the line picking*5 the rest of the party one by one.

In pursuance of this plan they lay inwait until they had cornered him in atrap when they tired a shot, striking hishorse in the hip; and looking aroundbe saw a long line of the red aminteddevils on three sides of him, while onthe fourth, in the direction of his .party,was half a mile or more of brokenground, cut up by dqep narrow ravines.It took but a moment to decide his lineof action. Putting spurs to his horsehe turned to the only loophole of es-cape, and, to the surprise of the Icdians,went leaping over the ravines, one afterthe other, at the risk of his life, but

with the assurance that they could not]follow him, as none of their ponieswere equal to the work, and to keepupthe pursuit they were obliged to makea long detour.

Having once got clear of the brokenground, Iloward. looking back, foundhinmelf well ahead, and was congratu-lating himself on so easy an escape,when hesawdirectlv before him, spring-ing out of the grass, a formidable arrayof Indians, interceptinrg his flight; thosepursuing in the rear clowed up, and al-most before he could realize the situa-tion he found himself again entrapped,this time by a line of Indians that en-tirely encircled him, numbering aboutone hundred, as near as hecould judge.They rapidly narrowed the limits of thecircle, and began taunting him with allmanner of insults, and telling him ofthe tortures that awaited him and of theslow roasting that they proposedto givehim. For several minutes he sat on hishorse trying to reconcile himself to thecertainty that death was before him,but when the first struggle was over alltrembling ceased, and with as true anaim as ever huntsman leveled at a deer,he drew up his rifle and fired at thenearest man, killing him in-stantly. Earlier in the fight he hadrealized -that he was more lightlyarmed than usual, having that morningleft his belt, with a brace of pistols anda box of cartridges, in camp to becleaned, taking only his Winchestercarbine, carrying twelve shots. Henow determined to sell his life as dearlyas possible, and, counting every shot,to be sure that he saved one for himselfas a dernier ressort in case of capture,since death by his own hand was prefer-able to slow torture. Twice more heshot in quick succession without fataleffect, when he suddenly put spurs tohis horse and dashed through the line.At this moment there was a generalscramble and rush for him, some tryingfor him with their spears, others seizinghis legs and striving to unhorse him.He succeeded in the twinkling of aneve in throwing them all off, and evenkilled a second man riding at his side,putting his gun against his (theIndian s) body and blazing away, theblood spurting over Howard's buckskinleggings, saddle and horse. The in-stant he freed himself from them andgot clear alone on open ground aheadof them, whece they were not in dangerof killing each other in shooting athim, they fired a volley of bullets andarrows at him. None of them hit him,and up to this moment he was entirelyunharmed. Had his horse been equallyfortunate this would doubtless haveended the fight, as the hdrse was a fine,high-spirited animal, superior to any ofthe Indian ponies. But the first shotreceived at the beginning of hostilitieshad cut a small artery, and from this theblood was pumping out a steady streamthat, together with his violent exertions,was fast sapping his strength. TheIndians, seeing this, were encouragedto continue the pursuit, and theirleader, mounted on an American stagehorse (stolen the day before at a stagestation a few miles back, which theyhad burned, murdering all the inmates),succeeded so well in keeping pace withhim, that Howard could almost feelthe breath from the nostrils ofhis pursuer's horse. Thus theyrode, nose to tail, for a mile or two,the Indian occupying the time inshooting at Howard. Three pistols, six-shooters, he emptied, and bullets flewaround poor Howard on every side.Four more entered the poor horse,already so badly wounded, a bulletpierced Howard's clothes at his side,another cut the strap of his field glass,which was lost, another cut off his spur,bursting the heel slightly butnot drawingblood; a fourth pierced the woodenbreech of his rifle, as hecarried itin hishand-almost striking it from his grasp;others struck the saddle, and in shortthey seemed to strike everywhere butwhere they were aimed. All this timeHoward was endeavoring to reach overhis shoulder and get a shot at the In-dian, but at every such movement thesavage silppea uner te o neiy or nimshorse and went out of sight, except ahand on the mane and heel on the back.Finally, all ammunition exhausted, theIndian resorted to his spear, and withthe wooden handle gave Howard oneor two severe raps on the head, trying toknock him out of his saddle-withoutavail, but at last Howard's horse,that hadbeen tottering shakily, from loss ofblood, fell on his knees, and the Indianrushed up to end the contest. At thatinstant the horse struggled to his feetagain and Howard saw that his oppor-tunity had come, his foe was at his side,and he quickly thrust his rifle againstthe Indi-aK's body and fired, blowing ahole through that seemed as large asone's arm. The Indian shrieked,leaped out of his saddle, and fell to theground on his face, dead.

Looking about, Howard sawthe remainder of the band fol-lowing .at a prudent distance, forby this time they began to look uponhim as a god, invulnerable to all theirweapons. When, at last, thepoor horsefell .prostrate, and apparently dead,they all ldocked up to make a final dis-position of their troublesome enemy.But Howard, undaunted, lay quietlydown behind the body of his horse, andwhen they came within short range,took deliberate aim and fired, killinganother man. This unlooked-for dis-aster completly demoralized them,and they fled in all directions. Withinthree minutes not an Indian was insight. He turned his attention to hishorse, loosened the girth to take off thesaddle, and was surprised when theanimal drew a deep breath andstruggled to his feet. He then led himslowly to where the rest of the partyhad made a stand about their wagou,and as he approached from one direc-tion I came limping up from the other.

Legal Intelligence.

A rather cute sort of a fellow cameto an Austin lawyer to engage him toundertake the defence of a suit for debt,when the following conversation tookplace:

,"You say you owe this man thatmoney?"

"O. yes: I owe him the money.""And you gave him a note for it?""Certainly."And you have property on which he

can levy?""Plenty of it.""Then, in the name of heaven, how

do you expect to rain the suit?""Colonel," said-the client, impress

ively, "you have been a Texas lawyerfor a good many years?"

"Certainly.""Well, did you ever know a Texas

jury to bring in a verdict according tothe law and the facts in the case?"

"Right you are," exclaimed thelawyer; "I'll take your case."--TexaSaftings.

-Indian story-tellers very often givetheir narrations entirely in sign lan-guage and the laughterof their hearerswill often be the only audible sound foran hour.-C-Aicago Times.

Hoew the Walter Was Feeledi

I have been so impressed with theprostrating dullness which pervades theatmosphere at Albany that 1 am notsurprised a "quiet game" should besought by some, of our legislators.Yesterday I asked a member if thegame was not a great relief to him whentired of the dreary humdrum of legisla-tive life.

"0, yes," was the sententious re-sponse. "A very great relief. Theyrelieved me of three hundred lastnight."

That suggests a good story. Theother night a party of legislators arosefrom the green-covered table withempty pockets and craving stomachs.It was too late to get anything to eatat their respective hotels, so they ad-journed to a well-known restaurant andenjoyed a hearty repast.

'"How are you going to liquidate?"asked one of the party, picking histeethreflectively.

"That's what I've been thinking of,"said another, who hails from the landof bards, saints and statesmen, "and Iwant you to stand by me in what I'mgoing to do."

The waiter was rung for and to himthe Celt explained thus:

"Boss, we've got intoalittle difficnltyhere. Each one of us insists on payingthe bill, and, as we are all pretty flush,neither one will give way. Now, then,to settle it, I propose that we blindfoldyou and that the first man you catchpays the score. It will be worth acouple of dollars to you."

The darkev grinningly consented;they blindfolled him with his own-pron and he started with outstretchedhands to capture his man. Aftertumb-ling over everything in the room andsustaining several severe bruises, he re-moved the blindfold and found himselfthe only occupant of the room! Thefestive feasters had slid out as soon asIt e apron had been tied on.

It will not take away any from thejoke to say that the bill was settled andan explanation given the next morning-N. Y. Star.

-The Picayune says that in theweighing-room of the New OrleansMint are thirty women at work, ofwhom four are colored. The salary is$1.73 per day. They go to work ateight and stop at four in the afternoon.The work requires the strictest atten-tion, and is of such a nature that it cannever become purely mechanical. Theround pieces of unstamped silver coinsare brought in wooden boxes. Eachpiece has to be weighed three times.A mistake in the weight of one piece,of even almost infinitesimal proportion,may cause the worker to lose her pdltdon. It seldom if ever happens, ow-ever, that one is discharged forcompetency, or Worse. crlsesnms.

A Patti ReearsalIt may not be generally known to the

lower classes that oneof Adelina Patti'speculiarities is that in private life sheis continually experimenting and prac-ticins the details of her art. The greatMrs. Siddons is said to have considered'all -the world's a stage" so literallythat she "ordered a beefsteak with theair of a tragedy queen," but the greatsongstress avails herself of even moretrivial and prosaic incidents to test herideas of art:stic effect.

The other evening a hall boy rushedbreathless into the office of the PalaceHotel, and informed Count Smith thatthere was a crazy woman in No. 999, onthe second floor. The Count hastilyrepaired to the room indicated, andwhich proved to be one of the rooms ofthe Patti suite. Getting no response tohis knock, he opened the door and wasastonished to behold the diva, pale anddisheveled, clutching a chair for sup-port and gazing at him with a look offrozen horror. In a tone that thrilled.the hotel official's heart, she warbled:

"It is he; quick. conceal yourselfIn this cabinet!"

and with a terrified movement sheclosed a closet door.

"A-anything wrong?" gasped theamazed bill stretcher, entering theroom.

Tripping gaily towardhim, the primadonna smiled fondly, let out a couple ofhigh C's at the chandelier, and mur-mured con crpressione:

"Be seated, dear father. You mustIndeed be fatigued by your long walkFrom Roen."

"W-h-a a-t?" stammered the be-wildered recorder of mythical "ex-tras."

The singer instantly changed her de-meanor to that of a proud womanstruggling with race and jealousy.After a couple of indignant cadenzasshe trilled a recitative:

"I have sent for you. Marquis toDenounc a thief. I have been robbedOf a ease of Jewels, and that womanIs the criminal!"

And with glaring eyes and outstretchedtingershe pointed to a dress lying uponthe bed. "A woman!" cried theChesterfield of the Register, now con-vinced that the twenty dollar ticketboom had turned the diva's head. "Idon't see any woman!"

"S--a-h!'" chanted the star, in lowtremolo notes, full of agony and des-air.

"Dost not hear his bloodStill drip on the marble floor?'He lies In the alcove yonder.Come let us peep at him.Fire stilettos In his breast.How Venice will shout to-morrow!"

And she dragegd the trembling man tothe bay window.

"I-I don't see anything," falteredthe autocrat of the counter, meditatinghow he cbuld make a running start forthe door.

But the absorbed artist beattime withher little foot for a moment and thenproceeded al crescendo.Wouldst betray us, then, hareheart?Traitor! It is thou alone shalt Are the palaceHere is thy torch-I alone will guard the postern.And she handed the champion hand-shaker a match, and, seizing a prop-erty dagger from the mantelpiece,placed her back against the door, mean-while running the scale in a mannerthat made the very walls crack.

"Now, if I yell out for help, I sup-pose I'll be murdered," groaned Smith,who was bathed in a cold perspiration."This crazy woman will slice me all

up." Just then his eye .fell upon theelectric fire alarm button.

"Certainly I'll fire the palace!" hesaid aloud, and lighting the match, heapplied it to the aforesaid safeguard.In a few seconds the door was burst

open by six porters carrying Babcockextinguishers, and before he could pre-vent st, had made a flabby wreck ofthe Count's. awe-inspiring shirt-front,besides almost squirting Patti's head ofher shoulders:

The Count rushed out to telegraphfor the Lunacy Commissioners, and ittook all the diplomacy of Mapleson,who arrived just then to square matters.

The Count was finally pacified withthe gift of a dozen elegantly embroid-ered fronts, but they do say that he hassince given the disi a wide birth, andnever hears her electric voice in thecourt yelling for her chambermaid,or more towels, w ithout hidingbehind a rack and shivering like a dogswallowing a bone.-Derrick Dodd, tsSea Fratscis Post.

A Beautihl Idesa.

To an Englishman who respects him.self it must be disquieting to find thatfor some of the most elementary con-veniences of life he must go abroad.It is, for instance, a little humiliatingto know that it is perfectly possible tobe photographed at home, and yet thatthere is no photographer in Londonwho is prepared to perform the processin this luxurious way. Ifone, however,goes across to Paris, one finds that, bywriting a post-card, a photograpberwill appear next morning completelyequipped for an operation. It is need-less, of course, to point out what a dif-ferent thing being photographed athome is to being photographed in whatis pleamsatly termed a "studio." Thereis no climbing to the sky, to begin with.There is no waiting till your predeces-sor is satisfactorily disposed of; andthere is, besides, an entire difference ofdemeanor on the part of the operator.The tyrant is no longer in his castle; heis at your house, and you have only toring the bell to have him shown out.He knows it, too, and the headrest isfound not tobe indispensable. Besidesthis, there are entirely new fields for

the photraphic practitioner. Onemay be phle raphed, for instance, inne's sleep, an occasion on which the

agliest of us is said to be sometimesbeautiBtl-if we only keep our mouthsshut. but the developments of theides u endless =-. Jameq' (seaeus.

8CUOL AND CnIBIUL-Thirteen schools for Chinese are

maintained by the various churches ofNew York City.

-The sliver communion servicestolen last September from a church isUxbridge, Mass., has been found buriedin a potato p b.-Bosto Ibst.

-- ut of the 102 deaths of ministersreported in the Baptist Year-Book,thirty-three were between seventy sadeighty at the time of decease, twentybetween eighty and ninety, and twowere over ninety.--. Y. Examnaer.

-The last census of India shows thatthe native Christians are increasingfifteen times as fast as thegeneral popu-lation. The causes areascrbed to con-versions from the non-Christians, ahigher birth rate and a lower death rateamong the Christians than amongHindoos and Mohammedans.

-One of the school laws of NewYork is that "No certificate shall begranted to any person to teach in thepublic schools of the State of New Yorkafter the first day of January, 1885,who has not passed a satisfactory ex-amination in physiology and hygiene,with special reference to the eects ofalcoholic drinks. stimulants and nar-cotics upon the human system."

-The United Presbyterie says that"the religious Interest in the collegesseem to be greater this year than forseveral years' past In some of themnearly all the students have made aprofession of religion. The religiousimpressions among the students arealso deep and fervent The whole num-ber of students is put at 35,000, and ofthese it is said one-half are members ofthe churches."

-The Methodists of Chicago havethirty-nine Sunday-schools; Lutherans,thirty-five; Congregationalists, twenty-six; byterians, twenty-hree; Ba-tists, twenty-five; Episcopalians, if-teen. The conversions during theyear, according to Mr. Jacob's reportto the convention recently held, num-ber: Baptists, three hunadred andseventy-seven; Congregationalists, onehundred and fifty-seven; Lutherans,omehundred and two; Methodists, one hun-dred and forty-sevenand Presbyterians,one hundred and sixty-seven.-(-ica•gnmes.

-Among the Methodist preachers ofNorth Carolina are only two whosesalary is over $2,000. The whole con-ference, 196 preahers, average $71.03each. Reaching the other way thereare forty-eight preachers who receiveless than 00, averaging $218 each;seventeen who get less than $00, av-eraging $158 each; eight preacherswho average $145 each, nd two whoget $110. In the Tennessee ceoferencethe thirteen highest preachers' salariesaverage $1,261.53, and the one hun-dred and fifty below these average$272, and the total average salary ofthe Methodist preachers in Tennesseeis $301.08.-Th Interior.

PFUNGET s PtAR A FtanS.

-Relatives of a rich man neverkowwhether he is sane or not until after hehas made his will.

-Doctors say that the people wouldbe healthier If they ate more onios.Undoubtedly thbe would. It wouldkeep them from going out nghts.--Burlington Bswkeye.--t was long aSo decided that bru-

nettes marry off tster than blondes.Untrue. It was long ago decided thatblondes alwsy _arrst, beame

-A manufacturer of whit. vLsgarclaims that his compound is aso muchbetter than the old-fashioned older con-coction that he has adopted the sign of"Who will care for mother nowP"'-Boston Cbrier.

-A half-column article n an eo-ehange tells "-How to Boll Water."This las are waste of spee. Theway to boil water is to put it in a kettloandset it on a hot stove. A quicker

method has never been discovered.-Norristowm Herald

--"What is the price do this ale.grease?" asked anewlerkof a grocerydealer; "there is no mark a it.' "Itdepends on your customer. If he asksfor axle-grease charge him fifteen centsa pound, but if he wants butter makeit thirty-eight eamt."-Ihiledlrphis

-"-Yes, sir," said a bagat, "rm arich man, but I've seen teday when Ihad to work as hard as anybody. Nowyou'd sarcely believe it. but when Istarted out in life I turned a erank atseventy-five cents a week." "•, yes, Iwould," said the listener. "was prettycertain that you had." "Had wht"Turned crank."-Oil CtWy Derrick.

--..4wot• per cnt. profit on gs:~-S soob, aid p Mos Schaumbgors m

dark, rainy dayto his oldest san, whis his chief clerk th "hand-me-down" department: "Schaeob, onesmore I dells yeu put cd dot gas, mo wesaves a leedle dose Ihar times.""Vader, let bumri' dot gas. Iseargeddot next gostomer what comes in temper shent extra to make good dot lossmit der ga" ."Sohaob put dot gascoud nd schar dot tea per shet.pesides, den veakes shut tevatyperheat."-Teae Bifngs.-Proper Engliksh.-

.wby .alwsry meatbs, esuAs grmaram l som sar we

Let as se

Wah tbis Mle t is t ahhts :

The egg m haebs. It at:

Jobns msesn ant menease, area anThe door lwmt i s wes lt.:Theple wae't s wasThe R aw r rordaartIu sgti asa'tts twas wasre

U~grr~l ___fs

with a bullet In my right leg. TheIndians had paid their gentle attentionto the rest of us during the time How-ard was having his tight, but fortunatelynot in force, and we succeeded in get-ting together at the wagon without theloss of a man, I being the only onewounded in the whole engagement.As soon as Howard joined us we startedon the retreat for camp, the Indianshar:ssing us the whole way. Theywould form in single file or all abreast,and charge as though they were goingto ride right over us, but on gettingwithin short range would wheel and re-tire, after discharging a volley of shotsthat would tear up the earth all aroundus. This was most terrifying to me, aboy fresh from school, who had neverexperienced any sort of warfare, andhad never even seen a gun fired by oneman at another-but Howard, who hadgone through four years of war of therebellion, and had seen three years ormore of border warfare with indians,was quite exhilarated by the excite-ment. He gave them a challenge bywalking alone several hundred yardsaway on one side. They charged, butretreated when he kneeled and fired.

Arriving at camp after an hour's rideand running fight, we found the escortthoroughly alarmed, and just startingout to pick up our dead bodies, for theyhad seen so many Ind;ans about thatthey made sure we were all killed.It was a scene of mutual re-joicing and congratulation, aswe had feared that they hadmet an untimely fate. A hasty councilof war was held as to what was to bedone. We were unanimous in theopinion that it was folly to continuework without a larger escort and a per-sonal body guard, besides it was ne-cessary that my wound should bedressed. Consequently it was decidedto turn our faces in the direction ofSheridan, which we did, arriving therelate in the afternoon. the Indians fol-lowing us all the way seeking an op-portunit' to attack us again. Withthem it became a question of revenge.as they had lost heavily, while we hadescaped entirely.

The horse that carried Howard sonobly through the first fight ultimatelyrecovered. Three of the five bulletswere extracted. I afterwards took himhome to Burlingame, where he wascarefully fed and pampered for someyears till he died.

I recovered from my wound veryquickly, and within six weeks rejoinedthe party, receiving promotion to thefirst place in the corps-that of transit-man-which I occupied until the roadwas completed.

Our miraculous escape was long thesubject of wonder on the frontier,where it was regarded as the most mar-velous on record, as we fought against'such fearful odds. I hope the narra-tive as f have written it will be intel-ligible. I fear I have not ,made it asclear as I could verbally. It alwaysexcites me to think or tell of it.-J. Y.Evening Post.

A Mysterious Author.At Abbotsford, in 1813. says Lock-

hart, Sir Walter Scott told with highmerriment a disaster that had befa:llenhim in the matter of postage. "Onemorning last spring," he said "I openeda huge lump of a dispatch, withoutlooking how it was addressed. neverdoubting it that it had traveled undersome omnipotent frank, like the firstlord of the admiralty's, when low andbehold the contents proved to be amanuscript play by a young lady ofNew York, who kindly requested me toread and correct it, equip it with pro-logue and epilogue, procure for it a fa-vorable reception from the manager ofDrury Lane, and make Murray or Con-stable bleed handsomely for the copy-right; and on inspecting the cover Ifound I had been charged fivepounds odd postage. This was badenough, but there was no help, so Igroaned and submitted. A fortnightor so after another packet, of not lessformidable bulk arrived, and was ab-sent enough to break its seal, too, with-out examination. Conceive my horrorwhen out jumped the same identicaltragedy of the "Cherok Lovers.' with asecond epistle from the authoress, stat-ing that, as the winds had been boister-ons, she feared the vessel intrusted withher communication might have found-ered, and therefore judged it prudentto forward a duplicate'

Who was "the young lady from NewYork and was the play ever published?"-Cor. Boston Transcript.

Let's Have the Trath.

Tn another month orso it will be timeto Legin advertising Northern summerresorts, and we take this earlyopportu-nity to ask a great favor on behalf ofthe whole American Nation. We sin-cerely hope that some one hotel manout of the 10.000 may ceme out with anhonest statement of facts. So far asthe resorts of Michigan and Wisconsingo we hope to see an advertisementabout as follows:

"This hotel can accommodate aboutseventy-five guests in a decent manner.Any one over this number can expectto sleep on the porch. Our rooms arefurnished with cheap furniture, poorcarpets and bedding of the most com-mon sort. Any one of our mattressesis warranted solid enough to answer fora meat block.

"This hotel is not romantically situ-ated. In fact, the site is the poorest inthe neighborhood, but we were lookingfor land at two dollars per acre whenwe bought. The views from the veran-das and windows are somewhat pic-turesque, when not interfered with bywindfalls, swamps and brush-heaps.

"We have flies and mosquitoes inplenty, and we neither use fly-screensuor mosquito bars.

"There is good rowing, bathing andfishing. The rowing consists in polingan old scow up and down, the bathingground has a mud bottom, and whenyou catch a fish please let us know it.~,linmows furnished free to guests.Whidh means twenty-five cents perlozen.

"'The climate is salubrious. Wedon't know what salubrious means, butwe have lots of rain, plenty of northwinds and very romantic fogs at night.Fires extra. We never knew of anyone dying here, but perhaps that is be-cause we promptly ship all sick folkshome before theyhave a chance to die.

"The table of this house is supplTiwith very poor meats, Chicago butter-ine, a fair grade of potatoes, adulteratedcoffee, poor tea, second-class bread andthe usual assortment of pickles andsauces. Children eating at the first ta-ble will be charged aull price. Allmeals sent to rooms will be extra.

"Washino-lists will be furnished atthe office. but the proprietor recom-mends you to go over to the swamp andwash your own shirts if you want extranice work.

"Our rates are $3 per day, or $15per week. While the terms may seemhigh to you, you should remember thatwe must make enough here in threemonths to allow us to live like nabobethe rest of the year."'Any one who may object to leaving

a good home, pure air, plenty to eatand a first-class bed for the sake of en-joying my privileges as mentionedabove, should at once consult an emi-nent physician. It is the eminent phy-sicians who recommend my hotel."-Detroit Free Press. .