grade 7 tda student samples the world’s tallest … 7 tda student samples the world’s tallest...

Grade 7 TDA Student Samples The World’s Tallest Trees—The Redwoods

Sample A

I can remember my trip to the redwood forest like it was yesterday. I can’t

believe that it has already been 2 years since I was there. I wonder how

many new trees have grown. You would never be able to tell unless you

looked very closely. Let me tell you about the wonderful experience I had

with my family when we went to the west coast.

We flew into Oregon and began our drive down the coast toward California.

There is a 450 mile strip along the Pacific Ocean coast just full of redwood

trees. My dad drove very carefully into the canyon because the fog was

thick as pea soup. It sure felt cooler but you could feel the humidity in the

air too. I guess this is the climate that redwoods thrive on.

We got out of the car and began walking. We saw lots of dropped needles,

dust, seeds and other materials that made the ground seem soft like

someone made a bed out of nature. As we walked we were amazed at how

tall the trees were. They had to be over 300 feet tall! That is a whole heck

of a lot taller than our maple trees back home. Not only were they tall but

my dad guessed them to be 18 feet around. My family of four coulnt even

put our arms around one tree!

We continued walking and found a tree with a sign on it. It said it was one

of the oldest trees in the forest. It was over 2000 years old. Holy cow

that’s old! The sign also told us that the bark was 12 inches thick and that

it was fire resistant. I felt it and it was smooth- not even a sticky feeling.

That is good because then it wont start a fire so easily.

My family walked and walked and walked. We finally got tired and decided

to come back another day. Did you know that the redwood tree is the state

tree of California? People come from all over the world to see them. If you

ever get a chance, head on out to the west coast and see for yourself. You

wont be disappointed!


Sample A Annotation

Score: 3

This response demonstrates effective analysis of text, use of evidence, and

writing skills. The response addresses the task of writing a narrative that

describes a family visit to a redwood forest. Details from the passage have

been well-integrated into the narrative, giving the reader a clear

understanding of the events and the setting of the story. The response

demonstrates sufficient understanding of the text. There is evidence of an

organizational structure that creates a clear timeline, although the ending is

not particularly effective or engaging. The mode is suited to the purpose.

The response uses precise word choice and content-specific vocabulary

from the text, and demonstrates conventions of standard English with a few

errors that seldom interfere with meaning.


Sample B

Imagine standing in the middle of a forest of the world’s tallest, most majestic trees

and looking up and up and up and still not seeing the treetops even while managing

to look up over 300 feet. That is how amazing standing in the middle of the

Redwood forest is. I read about this forest when I was in 7th grade and always

dreamed of visiting it, and now here I am seven years later finally making my

dreams come true.

I arrived at the redwood forest and spent several days driving along the Pacific

coast. My journey started in southern Oregon and ended up just south of San

Francisco, California. The coastal redwood tree which I had made this trip to see

grows in a 450 –mile strip along this part of the coast. There is nothing like a

redwood forest in Nebraska where I live (or anywhere else in the entire world). The

oaks, maples and elm trees that I grew up with in Nebraska are less than one third

the height of the redwood. Also, there is nothing living in the United States that I

know of that is comparable to their age. The oldest tree at about 2200 years old.

That means that tree started growing around 200 B.C.!

Before coming to the redwood forest, I could only get a glimmer of an idea of how

tall the redwood trees would be by looking at the Nebraska skyline. Most of the

buildings in Nebraska are shorter than the redwood but there are a few that are

taller. The building I often thought about to mentally compare heights was our

Capitol Building. It is the closest thing I am familiar with that matches up to the

height of the tallest redwood. Just looking at how tall the Capitol building is, I was in

awe that a tree could grow that tall.

And now, here I am standing in a redwood forest after all these years of only

imagining it. The area I am in is foggy and it is a peaceful feeling being here. What

is all around me is fog-covered canyon and a canyon creek flows nearby. Under my

feet is a cushion of thick pine needles. Besides making this a beautiful place, all

these things make an ideal environment for the redwood to thrive in. These trees

require lots of moisture and both the fog and creek supply that. It’s so foggy at times

that the fog drip can supply as much as 10 inches of moisture annually. The pine

needles form a mat of mulch that’s used by the trees for moisture during dry

summers. Some of the trees have a black spot from lightning or fire damage, but

usually there are little saplings sprouting next to them, so even if the tree dies more

trees will grow.

My visit is over. My dream has been fulfilled. I have visited what in my mind is one of

the wonders of the world. The magnificent redwoods! They stand above all other

trees and which have a history incomparable to anything else in the United States.


Sample B Annotation

Score: 4

This response demonstrates exemplary analysis of text, use of evidence,

and writing skills. The response addresses the task of writing a narrative

that describes a dream trip to visit the redwood forest. Details from the

passage have been thoroughly and skillfully integrated into the narrative,

giving the reader a complete understanding of the events and the setting of

the story. The well-focused response demonstrates thorough

understanding of the text. A strong, engaging introduction and well-focused

conclusion characterizes an organizational structure that creates a clear

timeline with purposeful transitions. The mode is suited to the purpose. The

response skillfully uses precise word choice and content-specific

vocabulary from the text to enhance the narrative. The response thoroughly

demonstrates conventions of standard English with few errors that do not

interfere with meaning.


Sample C

I went on vacation with my family to California. We went to Northern

California by the Pacific Ocean. We wanted to see the big redwood trees

so we drove to the foggy canyon to see them. It was very humid there. I

was amazed at how tall they really are. They are way taller than any trees

we have in Nebraska. They are even taller than some buildings in

Nebraska! When we were in the forest my mom parked the car and we got

out. All five of us held hand s to try to make a circle around one of the

trees. It was too big. Our arms were not long enough to meet. I guess we

need a bigger family if we want to circle a big redwood tree with are arms.

Some redwoods are up to 18 feet in diameter.

It was fun to drive through the redwood forest I hope that I can come back

one day. Maybe when I am an adult I will come back and show my children

the redwoods.


Sample C Annotation

Score: 2

This response demonstrates partially effective analysis of text, use of

evidence, and writing skills. The response partially addresses the task of

writing a narrative that describes a visit to a redwood forest. Some details

from the passage have been integrated into the story, giving the reader a

partial understanding of the events and the setting of the story; however,

many of the elements needed for an effective narrative are inadequately

developed demonstrating a partial understanding of the text and purpose.

There is partial evidence of an organizational structure and the mode is not

particularly suited to the purpose. The response occasionally uses precise

word choice and content-specific vocabulary from the text, and partially

demonstrates conventions of standard English with errors that occasionally

interfere with meaning.


Sample D

Visiting the redwood forest you would see tall trees. They are old trees and

live a very long life because they are healthy and strong and have an ideal

enviroment to grow in. One other thing to know is that no other plant can

live around a redwood because the redwood is dominant. You can see

they are taller then some other buildings in Nebraska.


Sample D Annotation

Score: 1

This response demonstrates limited analysis of text, use of evidence, and

writing skills. The response minimally addresses the task of writing a

narrative that describes a visit to a redwood forest. While a few details from

the passage have been included in the story, the response demonstrates

minimal development and demonstrates limited understanding of the text.

Many of the narrative elements needed for a higher score are missing.

There is little evidence of an appropriate organizational structure and the

mode is not suited to the purpose. The brief response ineffectively

demonstrates conventions of standard English.


Sample E

The Redwoods

This summer my family and I went to California.We explored the

forest of the redwood trees and found out many different things about them.

It was really humid and dry but the trees had a

lot of moisture in them.The bark was really thick and the trees were the

tallest trees I had ever seen.The tree trunks were really thick too.I guessed

that the trees were about 300 feet hight and about 10 around the trunk.As

we kept on walking we found all kinds of animals and other plants.A lot of

the animals lived in the redwoods.I knew what most of the animals were but

some of the plants I had never seen.Next to some of the redwoods there

was smaller ones that were stil growing those were about 10-20 feet hight

and there was some that were only a couple feet hight.It was really shady

under all the redwood trees because the leaves made a conopy.So we

stopped and had lunch and after that we went and continued exploring .We

found that the leaves,pine needles and other stuff covered the ground and

made a place where all the water was held during the summer

That was my family trip to california and

visiting the redwood trees.I hope we can go again next summer.


Sample E Annotation

Score:


Sample F

In my narrative story I will be telling you about my trip to the redwood

forest in California.

Last summer me and my family went to the redwood forest for a vacation. It

was a very, very, long car trip over all the way to California. It was about 11

hours to get there in a car. The car trip was not very fun to say the least. It was

rather uncomfortable and annoying that I had to sit by my sister the whole way

over. The worst part is we couldn’t have any bathroom breaks, because if we

did we would be there after sundown. But we 2 bathroom breaks anyway. We

left our house at around 6:30 in the morning and we arrived to the hotel we

were staying in at around 8 or 9 in the night. We were all so very tired from the

car.

The next day we went to the forest and went around on a walk around to

know our surrounding cause we would be staying the night in a log cabin in the

forest that night. It was extremely foggy and the humidity was high in the forest.

This was because we were 30-40 miles off the coast of the Pacific Ocean.

When we started walking the trees were so much larger than I would have ever

thought. My sister said that the trees grow up to 300 feet or more in their

lifetime. We went to go touch one of the trees and to our surprise there was no

tree sap on them at all! In the book my sister had brought with her (It was all

about trees. She is like some kind of like nature person.) it said that the trees

are extremely strong, have very thick bark which is also fire resistant, they are

safe from most diseases, and have no sap to help with fires. They also lived to

be extremely old. Around 2,200 years is the oldest one we know of today.

We started to keep going through the forest when we saw a tree with a

whole right in the middle of it. We were shocked to see this and did not know

why this could possibly be there. Then we saw a tour guide showing the people

the tree and telling them about it. He said that the people who had designed

the park had the tree in the way of the road there were building so they thought

why don’t we just go straight through the tree instead! So that is what they did.

They cut a hole straight through the tree and even though you may think it is

dead it was still living. We then keep going on or walk through the forest. When

we were done we took a car ride back through the forest and when we came


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Sample F (continued)

back to the tree with the whole in it, it was so wide it looked like two trucks

could go through it! We then paid the person who drove us back through the

forest to the beginning of the park. We then got our things that we needed and

walked into the new hotel we were staying in for the night.

The hotel we were now staying in was made from the redwood trees from

the forest. Everything looked so beautiful. Almost everything was made from

the wood. Tables, chairs, floors, ceilings, desks, and more. The inside of the

wood was actually not red like I thought it would be it was a Dorito dust orange

mixed with a sort of beige color. When we got our room keys and we opened

our room it was huge. Just like before everything was made from the wood. We

then unpacked and went to sleep in our comfy beds. In the morning we went

down into the dining hall and ate of food. We then sadly packed our things

cause this was our last day here. We loaded our things and we went to our

SUV and then left. This time back we talked about if we should go there again

next year. I am a quiet person so I did not engage in the conversation. When

they asked me if I wanted to go I told them if only a friend can go with us next

year so they can react the same way I did and so I would not be bored on the

car ride over and back. They laughed and said sure why not have someone. I

was then happy and was thinking all the way back home about who I should

bring next year.

So about all my great things I said about the place would you like to

come with me next year? Or would you just do your own things? Thank you for

reading my story about the awesome forest in California.


Sample F Annotation

Score:


Sample G

Visiting the tallest Trees- The Redwoods

Last year I took a trip San Francisco in the fall and visited the

redwood forest. The trees there were very tall, they looked bigger than 30

story building. I went on the trip with my mom dad, two brothers, and little

sister. We had to wake up really early to pass traffic.

When we finally got there and we were walking through the forest

there was so much fog that I could barely see anything! As a result of not

being able to see my oldest brother tripped on a rock and fell on the ground!

I laughed so hard my stomach hurt. While we kept on walking th efog finally

went away and all over the ground were lots of droppes needles,seeds, and

trapped dust forming a mat of mulch.My mother told me that the mulch traps

moisture for the trees in the summer.Only some of the trees I saw had black

marks from fire. When i mentioned that my dad told us a story about how

when he was little there was a huge fire and how a lot of trees burnt down.

Eventually my mom got tired of walking and kept on

complaining about her boots getting dirty so we had to go home, but i had an

amazing time visiting the huge Redwood Forest.


Sample G Annotation

Score:


Sample H

The Legends of the Redwood Forest

It was about four years ago when I visited the foggy, misty forest. The trees

were towering above our heads, and the ground covered with dropped

needles, seeds, mulch, and a combination of nature’s materials with fog

almost clouding my vision. Of course, this was an astounding sight. Well, I

thought it was, and then my cousins told me the legends of the Redwood

Forest.

My cousins were only a few years older than me, one thirteen named Jay,

another fourteen Alex, and the last one seventeen named Julie. It was the first

time we’ve been on a whole family vacation for years, despite only living ten to

fifteen minutes away from each other. As much as I loved my cousins, there

was one thing they liked to do that specifically irked me. Before we’d go

anywhere, even at the local park, the trio liked to spook me. I’m not afraid to

admit that I can get scared from just about anything, I still run under the table

when the doorbell is rung. This time, they told me the legend of the Redwood

monster.

The night before the tour, they cornered me down. The bed was cramped

with nine-year-old me and my three teenage relatives. Jay made a haunted

expression on his face, and began the story.

“Have you ever wondered why no other living animal lurks in the tall-treed

forest? Why the trees are build strong and fire resistant? The forest has a

creator, and that creator is the Redwood monster.”, Jay whispered hoar

“The Redwood monster eats humans, any organism they could find. Once, a

man named Jack Harkness went into the forest on a cold and stormy night.

Rumors say, he never returned”, Julie smirked and passed the flashlight onto

Alex next, who wore a gigantic smirk on his face.

“People say he fell into the misty canyon creeks, and others say he tried to

climb a tree to escape it. His wife found a skeletal hand on her doorstep the

next day.”

Then the flashlight went off with a click. I tugged my blanket a little closer

that night. I would do anything to escape the fate of the loathsome creature.


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Sample H (continued)

The next morning, I stuffed myself with all the breakfast I could get. Being seen

by the monster meant running, and running meant I needed energy. I could hear

Alex sniggering from the other side of the future, but we’d see who would be

laughing when he got caught by the beast. Eventually, our parents started the

engines of the cars, and almost in a flash we were there. In the Redwood Forest.

The trees were nearly as tall as the Nebraska Capitol, and their canopies

covered the sky. It looked cold and gloomy with the mist shrouding the forest. I

shivered as I walked past, unaware of the three people snickering behind me.

“Hey, did you guys know that the bark of these trees are six to twelve inches

thick? Fire resistant, too. Fascinating, don’t you think?”, my uncle said. He looked

over at me and saw my frightened expression.

“Huh, you looked like you’ve seen a ghost. Wouldn’t be surprised if there were a

few in a place as mysterious as that.”

“There is, haven’t you heard? The Redwood monster? He killed Jack Harkness a

long time ago!”, I stuttered.

“Aw, come on. I knew the three of them would stir something up. There’s nothing

in that forest, in fact, the canopies shade the entire area, and no killer plant could

ever grow without sunlight.”, my mom stated. She gave the trio a warning look

before taking my hand.

I could see Jay choking a laugh as his dad lectured him.

“See those scorch marks on the bark? Sometimes fire still manages to burn it,

and it starts decaying. They start stump-sprouting, that’s what the little sapling

is.”, my dad announced, switching the topic. I started seeing how cool the forest

actually was. It cheered me up a whole lot, considering I looked like I’ve seen a

dead body in the past half hour of our trip.

Even with the scare, and the quite eventful vacation, I cherish that day. The

Redwood Forest is a truly astounding. My cousins still try to spook me to this

day, but due to the fact that I researched every place we visited before we

actually went after that, it never worked. Maybe next time, I will be the one to

scare them. It’s one of my priorities whenever I’m on vacation. Now it’s only a few

months until our next annual vacation. We’ll see how the ‘legends of the Virginia

Forest’ will go, next.


Sample H Annotation

Score:


Sample I

The redwood tree is very special tree. This tree has many helpful

characteristics.

The redwood can live up to 2000 years and grow up to 300ft. They

can grow along the coast of southern oragon to the south coash of san

Francisco.Redwoods can not grow 30 to 40 miles from the coast.

Redwoods have shallow roots to help them live longer than other

types of trees. Since the roots a closer to the surface they soak up more

water.If a root grows to far in to the ground it shrivls away and dies.

Redwoods make it hard for other plants under it’s canapy. If a

redwood gets a black mark were it got burnt it starts to decay. As it decays

it sends out around it’s self. These seeds grow and are the only plant that

survive in the drak moist enviernment, this process is called stamp.

All these things make the redwood special. They live for 2000 years,

have flam resistant bark, and are very big.


Sample I Annotation

Score:


Sample J

Visiting the Redwoods

When I visited the “Redwoods” it was amazing I saw the tallest tree

standing in the United States.It grows over 300 feet tall it is also as tall as

a 30-story building and is almost three times the height of the Oak,

Maple,and elm trees rarely tower more than one hundred feet acoording to

the passage. The girth of the redwood tree is also significant and can be up

to 18 feet in diameter according to research. Its officially named the

“Sequoia sempervirens.

When I traveled to San Francisco, California I went to see the

“Redwoods” on the coast of the Pacific Ocean. It was really foggy and

moist but that was supposed to help the trees.. Evidence has shown that

up to 10 inches of fog drips creates moisture for the redwoods tree. The

forest floors around the redwoods is filled with dropped needles, trapped

dust,seeds, and other forming a mat of mulch according to the passage.

Fog lowers the temperature and provides humidity and creates moisture for

these trees according to the passage as well.

Redwoods can live longer than two thousand years. Scientist say “the

oldest living redwood tree is about 2,200 years old” according to research.

Red woods bark is fire resistant according to the passage. They are also

resistant to diseases and undesirable to insects that consume wood.

Redwoods don’t have taproots that burrow deeply into the ground like

other trees. They do have shallow roots that rest near the top of the soil.

“Redwoods form a wide radius of shallow roots around their base, that’s

what helps them survive so long.” These trees are also able to “survive

flooding and mudflows cover the roots because they grow new roots

quickly, the other roots simply just rot away.”

When I visited the redwoods in I found out that the redwoods trees

are the dominate living plants also that it was really hard for other plants to

grow near these trees, because of the canopy of shade these giant trees

provide. Sometimes even though redwoods have a thick bark that is

resistant to fire, fire sometimes damage these trees. Saplings usually are

the ones surrounding a fire-damaged redwood because they can survive in

shady, moist environments according to the passage and research.


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Sample J (continued)

I learned that stump-sprouting process of the redwood tree

reproduction is much more successful than seeding. Redwoods have

cones growing within their branches. These cones release tiny brown

seeds when they mature. Individual trees produce up to 6 million

seeds.They already established root systems from the stump-sprouted

trees provide the new saplings with the ability to grow better than the

seeded trees, according to the passage I read.

The redwood tree is the California state tree. Visitors come from all

over the world to come see this magnificent tree. It is very big in size and it

is very long. The coastal redwood is in the height of 300 feet and 400 feet

and the sharp tower is between 50 and 100 feet. It is one of the biggest

tree or the biggest tree in the United States.


Sample J Annotation

Score:

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