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Page 1: Language Paper 1 -Extract - The De Montfort School live files/homework... · 2019-05-17 · Language Paper 1 -Extract The first thing you need to do is read through the text… Blood
Page 2: Language Paper 1 -Extract - The De Montfort School live files/homework... · 2019-05-17 · Language Paper 1 -Extract The first thing you need to do is read through the text… Blood
Page 3: Language Paper 1 -Extract - The De Montfort School live files/homework... · 2019-05-17 · Language Paper 1 -Extract The first thing you need to do is read through the text… Blood

LanguagePaper1- ExtractThefirstthingyouneedtodois

readthroughthetext…BloodonSnowByJoNesbo

Thesnowwasdancinglikecottonwoolinthelightofthestreetlamps.Aimlessly,unabletodecidewhetheritwantedtofallupordown,justlettingitselfbedrivenbythehellish,ice-coldwindthatwassweepinginfromthegreatdarknesscoveringtheOslofjord.Togethertheyswirled,windandsnow,roundandroundinthedarknessbetweenthewarehousesonthequaysidethatwereallshutforthenight.Untilthewindgotfedupanddumpeditsdancepartnerbesidethewall.Andtherethedry,windsweptsnowwassettlingaroundtheshoesofthemanIhadjustshotinthechestandneck.

Bloodwasdrippingdownontothesnowfromthebottomofhisshirt.Idon’tactuallyknowalotaboutsnow– ormuchelse,forthatmatter– butI’vereadthatsnowcrystalsformedwhenit’sreallycoldarecompletelydifferentfromwetsnow,heavyflakes,orthecrunchystuff.Thatit’stheshapeofthecrystalsandthedrynessofthesnowthatmakethehaemoglobin inthebloodretainthatdeepredcolour.Eitherway,thesnowunderhimmademethinkofaking’srobe,allpurpleandlinedwithermine,likethedrawingsinthebookofNorwegianfolktalesmymotherusedtoreadtome.Shelikedfairytalesandkings.That’sprobablywhyshenamedmeafteraking.

TheEveningPost hadsaidthatifthecoldcarriedonlikethisuntilNewYear,1977wouldbethecoldestyearsincethewar,andthatwe’drememberitasthestartofthenewiceagescientistshadbeenpredictingforawhile.ButwhatdidIknow?AllIknewwasthatthemanstandinginfrontofmewouldsoonbedead.Therewasnomistakingthewayhisbodywasshaking.HewasoneoftheFisherman’smen.Itwasnothingpersonal.Itoldhimasmuchbeforehecollapsed,leavingasmearofblooddownthewall.IfIevergetshot,I’dratheritwaspersonal.Ididn’tsayittostophisghostcomingafterme– Idon’tbelieveinghosts.Ijustcouldn’tthinkofanythingelsetosay.ObviouslyIcouldhavejustkeptmymouthshut.That’swhatIusuallydo,afterall.Sotheremusthavebeensomethingthatmademesotalkativeallofasudden.MaybeitwasbecausetherewereonlyafewdaystogobeforeChristmas.I’veheardthatpeoplearesupposedtofeelclosertoeachotheraroundChristmas.ButwhatdoIknow?

Ithoughtthebloodwouldfreezeontopofthesnowandendupjustlyingthere.Butinsteadthesnowsuckedthebloodupasitfell,drawingitinunderthesurface,hidingit,asifithadsomesortofuseforit.AsIwalkedhomeIimaginedasnowmanrisingupfromthesnowdrift,onewithclearlyvisibleveinsofbloodunderitsdeathlypaleskinofice.

OnthewaybacktomyflatIcalledDanielHoffmannfromaphoneboxtotellhimthejobwasdone.

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Readagainthefirstpartofthesourcefromlines1to7.

Listfourthingsaboutthesnowfromthispartofthesource.(4marks)

A) ________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

B) ________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

C) ________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

D) ________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Question1– YourGo!

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Band Marks Description

Simple,limitedcomment

1-2 Willmakebasicpointsfromwordchoices.Somemisunderstandingsandrepetitionoftext.

Someunderstandingand

comment

3-4 Willmakebetter interpretations,butwillstillbelimitedtooneortwofeaturesoflanguage.Someinterpretationsmaynotbesecure.

Clear,relevantexplanation

5-6 Willmakeclear pointsaboutthelanguageuse– butnotallthreebulletpoints.Willnotgivemultipleorextendedinterpretations.

Detailed,perceptive analysis

7-8 Willpickuponrangeof words,languagefeaturesandsentences.Will makepointsthatnoteveryoneelsewillmake(avoidtheobviousinterpretations!) Willfullyexploreconnotations withmultipleand extendedinterpretationsthatwillbeoriginalinplaces.

Question2Guide

Subject Terminology Whatisit?

Noun

Adjectives

Adverbs

Alliteration

Metaphor

Onomatopoeia

Personification

Similes

SensoryLanguage

Repetition

Fillinthetablewiththeirdefinitions.Ifyouwantahighermark,youneedtoalsoknowwhatsimple,minor,compoundandcomplexsentencesare,andfurtherwordclassotherthantheoneslistedhere.

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Nesbo usespersonificationwhendescribinghow“thesnowwasdancinglikecottonwool,”whichdemonstratestherhythmicandgracefulwaythatthesnowwasfalling,andindicatinghowenjoyableitmusthavebeentowitnessthespectacle.Dancingcanalsobeunpredictableandusuallyincorporatesothers,thereforedemonstratinghowrandomandunexpectedthemovementswereandthecontributionofallthesnowflakesinthefall.Thenounuseof“cottonwool”hasconnotationsofcleanlinessandsoftness,demonstratingthepurityofthesnowandthepeaceandcalmofthesetting.

Point->Identifyalanguagefeatureused….Evidence->GiveasuitablelineofevidenceExplanationofleadtechnique->Explaintheeffectofthelanguagefeaturethathasbeenused.Zoominonawordchoice->Exploretheconnotationsofthatwordandexplainwhatthistellsyouaboutthetopic.

Youneedtofollowthisstructureineachparagraph…

Belowisanexampleparagraph.Eachlinehasbeencolouredtomatcheachrequirementabove.

Thisisgoodbecause:• I’veusedsubjectterminologywhere

Ican.• Ihavebeenspecificandnotrambled

on.• Ihaveembeddedmyquote.• Ihaveextendedmyinterpretations

beyondthebasic.

Question2Guide

EdwardtheAQAExaminersays:Thetopstudentswillavoidtheobviouspointsandgoforthemoreoriginalanduniqueideasthatotherswillnotcomeupwith– likethisunderlinedsection.Donotsettleforbasicpointslike,“thisshowstheweatherisnice”

– whatbetterpointscanyoumake?

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Lookindetailatthisextract.

.Howdoesthewriteruselanguageheretodescribetheweather?Youcouldincludethewriter’schoiceof:

• Wordsandphrases• Languagefeaturesandtechniques• Sentenceforms

(8marks)________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

_

Question2- Yourgo!

Thesnowwasdancinglikecottonwoolinthelightofthestreetlamps.Aimlessly,unabletodecidewhetheritwantedtofallupordown,justlettingitselfbedrivenbythehellish,ice-coldwindthatwassweepinginfromthegreatdarknesscoveringtheOslofjord.Togethertheyswirled,windandsnow,roundandroundinthedarknessbetweenthewarehousesonthequaysidethatwereallshutforthenight.Untilthewindgotfedupanddumpeditsdancepartnerbesidethewall.Andtherethedry,windsweptsnowwassettlingaroundtheshoesofthemanIhadjustshotinthechestandneck.

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________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Question2- Yourgo!

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Self-Assess

MarkScheme

Perceptive,Detailed(7-8)Showsperceptiveanddetailedunderstandingoflanguage• Analysestheeffectsofthewriterschoicesoflanguage.• Selectsarangeofjudiciousquotations• Usesarangeofsubjectterminologyappropriately.Clear,relevant(5-6)Showsclearunderstandingoflanguage• Clearlyexplainstheeffectsofwriterschoices.• Selectsrelevantquotations• Usessubjectterminologyaccurately.Some,attempts(3-4)Showssomeunderstandingoflanguage• Attemptstocommentontheeffectoflanguage• Selectssomerelevantquotations• Usessomesubjectterminology,notalwaysappropriately

Iwouldgivemyself_____marks.ToimprovenexttimeIneedto:

Inthisquestion,Imustrememberto:

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Considerthewholetext.Howhasthewriterstructuredthetexttointerestyouasareader?Youcouldwriteabout:

• Whatthewriterfocusesyourattentiononatthebeginning.• Howandwhythewriterchangesfocusasthesourcedevelops.• Anyotherstructuralfeaturesthatinterestyou.

(8marks)

Yourquestionwilllookabitlikethis….

Marks:8Time:10mins

Need:2– 3PEEEparagraphs

Skill:Analysingstructuralchoices

Question3Guide

Nowwe’regettingreallytricky.Analysingstructureisnoteasy…

Again,thisisonlymeanttotake10minutesandisjust5%ofyourGCSE– do

nottakelongonthis.

Edna’sStrategyWhenyoureadtheextract,splititintothreesections(beginning,middleandend).Foreachsection,consider:• WhichREFFSONtechniqueshavebeenapplied.

Howdoesthisengagemeasareader?• Howistheoveralldevelopmentofthestructure

areflectionofthecharactersthoughtsoractions?

Mirroring:Justlikeanimageinamirror,writers

canuselanguageandstructureto

reflectthethoughtsandactionsofthecharacter.

Nostructurehasjustbeenouttogetherrandomly,andIwouldwantmyhigherstudentstobeabletoidentifyhowthestructureisrepresentativeofthewider

plotandcharacter.

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Band Marks DescriptionSimple,limited

comment1-2 Willmakebasicpointsfromstructuralchoices.Some

misunderstandingsandrepetitionoftext.

Someunderstandingandcomment

3-4 Willmakebetter interpretations,butwillstillbelimitedtooneortwofeaturesofstructure.Someinterpretationsmaynotbesecure.

Clear,relevantexplanation

5-6 Willmakeclear pointsaboutthestructure– butnotallbulletpointswillbecovered.Willnotgivemultipleorextendedinterpretations.

Detailed,perceptiveanalysis

7-8 Willpickuponrangeof structuralchoices.Will makepointsthatnoteveryoneelsewillmake(avoidtheobviousinterpretations!) Willfullyexplorehow thestructuralchoicesmirrorthecontent,withmultipleand extendedinterpretationsthatwillbeoriginalinplaces.

Question3Guide

Terminology

Whatisit? How hasitbeenusedinthetext?

RepeatWhatideas/wordshave

beenrepeated?

EndingWhatis interestingaboutthe

lastline?

Foreshadowing

Arethere anyfocusesthatforeshadowalaterevent?

FocusWhatisthemainfocusof

theopening?Why?

SequenceHowdoesthe focuschangethroughouttheopening?

OpeningWhatis interestingaboutthe

openingline?

NarrativeVoice

How wouldyoudescribethenarrativevoice?

JuxtapositionArethereanyfocuses thatopposeeachother?

Fillinthetablewithhowthefollowingstructuraltechniqueshavebeenusedinthetext..

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Nesbo focusesonthegentleandpure“cottonwool”likesnowatthestartoftheextract,whichputsthereaderatafalsesenseofease,fortheapparentlyidyllicweatheristhesettingforacallousmurderthatthecharacterseemstofeelnoguiltfor.Thejuxtapositionofthe“cottonwool”snowbeing“drivenbythehellishice-coldwind”intheweathermayforeshadowthehumanbeingkilledbyaforceofviolenceandmalice,andtheclashbetweenthesnowandthewindisrepresentativeoftheconflictingimageofthepeacefulsnowwiththebleeding,deadbody. Tobestruckwithsuchacrimesoearlyhasthereaderquestioningthemotivesandreasonsbehindit,andforsuchbarbaritytooccuragainstsuchapurebackdropmeansthereadercomestoexpectshockandhorroratanytime.

Point->Identifythestructuralfeature(s)used….Evidence->GivesuitableevidenceExplanation->Howhasthatstructuraldevicebeenused?Whatisinterestingaboutit?Doesthestructuremirrorthecontentinanyway?Engagement->Whydoesthatstructuraltechniqueengagethereader?

Youneedtofollowthisstructureineachparagraph…

Belowisanexampleparagraph.Eachlinehasbeencolouredtomatcheachrequirementabove.

Question3Guide

EdwardtheAQAExaminerlikes:

Thefactweworkedchronologically– startwiththeopening,thenthemiddle,andendwiththeend.

Thecarefulconsiderationofthedualpurposeofstructure– whydoesitengageareader?Howdoesitreflect

thewidercontent?

Thefactwearenotjustputtingobviouspoints,butarecarefullyconsideringmorepersonaland

uniqueinterpretations.

Thespecificexplanationoftheeffectonthereader– donotbegeneralandvague,butspecificallyexaminethethoughtsandreactionsofthe

reader.

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Considerthewholetext.

Howhasthewriterstructuredthetexttointerestyouasareader?

Youcouldwriteabout:

• Whatthewriterfocusesyourattentiononatthebeginning.• Howandwhythewriterchangesfocusasthesourcedevelops.• Anyotherstructuralfeaturesthatinterestyou.

(8marks)

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Question3- Yourgo!

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Question3- Yourgo!

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Self-Assess

MarkScheme

Perceptive,Detailed(7-8)Showsperceptiveanddetailedunderstandingofstructure• Analysestheeffectsofthewriter’schoiceofstructuralfeatures.• Selectsarangeofjudiciousquotations• Usesarangeofsubjectterminologyappropriately.Clear,relevant(5-6)Showsclearunderstandingofstructure• Clearlyexplainstheeffectsofwriterschoicesofstructuralfeatures.• Selectsrelevantquotations• Usessubjectterminologyaccurately.Some,attempts(3-4)Showssomeunderstandingofstructure• Attemptstocommentontheeffectofstructuralfeatures• Selectssomerelevantquotations• Usessomesubjectterminology,notalwaysappropriately

Iwouldgivemyself_____marks.ToimprovenexttimeIneedto:

Inthisquestion,Imustrememberto:

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Forthisanswer,youneedtoconsiderthewholetext.Areaderofthisextractsaid“themurderer,Olav,feelsnoregretorremorseforthemurderhe’scommitted”

Towhatextentdoyouagree?

Inyourresponse,youcould:

• ConsideryourownimpressionsofOlav.• EvaluatehowthewritershowsthatOlavfeelsnoregretorremorse.• Supportyourresponsewithreferencestothetext.

(20marks)

Yourquestionwilllookabitlikethis….

Marks:25Time:20mins

Need: Introductionand4PEEZEs

Skill:Evaluation

Question4GuideThisonesoundsalotharderthenitreallyis– ifyoufollowmysteps,

you’llbefine!

Thisoneis12.5%ofyourwholeGCSEandisworthhalfthereadingmarksonthispaper.It

needsyourfullattentionforatleast20minutes.

Edna’sTopTips• Youmust,mustknowabankofwriter’smethodsforthisquestion.Aswellas

thelanguagefeaturesandstructuralfeaturesalreadyexplored,learnthoseonthenextpageasastartingpoint.

• KnowthePEEZEstructureandaimfor4in20minutes.• Theexaminerlovesitwhenyoucanoffermultipleanddifferingpointsofview.

Whenyoumakeapoint,youneedtoconsidering:Whatelse?Canthisevidenceargueagainstthistoo?Arethereadditionalinterpretations?

Edna’sStrategy• Whilstyoureadthroughtheextract,highlightanyevidence

tosuggestthatsupportsoropposeswithyourpointofview.• Then,selectthe‘richquotes’– theonesthathaveclear

writersmethodsinthemthatyoucanpickoutandexplain.• Startwithanintroductiongiveyouroverallview,considering

thetextasawhole.Allyourpointsgoingforwardwilllinkbacktothisoverallview.

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Question4Guide

Writer’sChoices Whatisit?

LanguageTechniques

Keywords

Sentencetypes

Dialogue

Structuralchoices

Punctuation

Explicit /ImplicitInfo

Tone

Intermsofwriterschoices,youcouldfocuson….

Thisonetakesalittleplanningofthoughtandpreparationtodowell.Firstofall,jotdownsomeinitialideasforandagainst…

Reasons tosupportstatement Reasonsagainststatement

Introduction:Overall,doyouagreeordisagreewiththestatement?Inwhatway?Beasspecificasyoucan.

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Overall,IfeelthatOlavistryingreallyhardtonotfeelregretorremorseandistryingtogivetheimpressiontohimselfandothersthatheisnotbotheredbythemurder– howeverheisnotascomfortableashewouldliketobelieve.

Aclearexampleofthisisthepeculiarstudyingofthebloodonthesnow,whenhequerieswhether,“thebloodwouldfreezeontop.”Thefactthatheisstoppingtostudythebloodandobserveit’sbehaviouronthesnowindicatesagreaterconcernforthemurder– heisnotabletodismissitsoeasily.Thewriter’suseofimagerycanalsodemonstrateafurtheruneasethatOlavhas,for“thesnowsuckedthebloodupasitfell,drawingitinunderthesurface,hidingit.”ThisimageofthebloodbeinghiddenfromviewisreflectiveofOlav’sattitudetothemurder– hewouldrather‘hide’thedeedatthebackofhismindandconsiderthesciencebehindthebloodratherthanembraceregretforthemurder.However,inthesnowandinOlav,theevidenceofthemurderisstillthereandcannotbehiddenpermanently.Ontheotherhand,Olavbelievesthesnowdidthis“asifithadsomesortofuseforit”– soratherthenthisabsorptionbeingarepresentationofOlav’srefusaltofaceregret,actuallyhemayhaveneededtocompletethemurderasapersonalrequirement;hisoverallfeelingmaythereforehavebeenoneofredemptionandsatisfaction,ratherthenregretandremorse.

Pointandevidence – MakeaninterpretationandgiveevidencetosupportExplanation– whatisyourpersonalreflection/impressionofthecharacterfromthequotechosen?Zoom onwriter’smethods– Howdothewriter’smethodscommunicatethisinterpretation?Expand – Canyouofferanalternative/additionalinterpretationfromthisquote,oristhereanadditionalwriter’smethodthatyoucanidentify?

Youneedtofollowthisstructureineachparagraph…

Belowisanexampleparagraph.Eachlinehasbeencolouredtomatcheachrequirementabove.

Question4Guide

EdwardtheAQAExaminersays:

Nice,specificintroductionthat

attacksthestatement.

Original,thoughtful

explorationofhowwriters

methodssupportinterpretation.

The‘somethingextra’neededfortopband– analternativeoradditional

interpretation.

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Forthisanswer,youneedtoconsiderthewholetext.Areaderofthisextractsaid“themurderer,Olav,feelsnoregretorremorseforthemurderhe’scommitted”

Towhatextentdoyouagree?

Inyourresponse,youcould:

• ConsideryourownimpressionsofOlav.• EvaluatehowthewritershowsthatOlavfeelsnoregretorremorse.• Supportyourresponsewithreferencestothetext.

(20marks)

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Question4- Yourgo!

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Question4- Yourgo!

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Edwardwants…General

q Ambitiousvocabulary

q Paragraphvarietyq Punctuationvariety

q Capitalsq .q ““q :q ;q -q ,q ()

q Sentencevarietyq Simpleq Shortq Compoundq ComplexDevices

q Alliterationq Adjectivesq Adverbsq Metaphorsq Onomatopoeiaq Personificationq Similesq SensoryImageryq Depth

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Question5- Yourgo!

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Edwardwants…General

q Ambitiousvocabulary

q Paragraphvarietyq Punctuationvariety

q Capitalsq .q ““q :q ;q -q ,q ()

q Sentencevarietyq Simpleq Shortq Compoundq ComplexDevices

q Alliterationq Adjectivesq Adverbsq Metaphorsq Onomatopoeiaq Personificationq Similesq SensoryImageryq Depth

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Question5- Yourgo!

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LanguagePaper2

InsectionB,Iwanttoknowifyoucancreateinterestingtexts,using

effectively:

• Techniquestodescribeandexplain• Paragraphs

• Goodvocabulary• Punctuation• Spelling

InsectionA,Iwanttoknowifyoucan:

• Takeinformationfromatext.• Summarisethekeyinformation

acrosstwotexts.• Identifyandexplainlanguage

features• Compareandcontrastthepoints

ofviewgivenintwotexts.

Question Marks Time %of wholeGCSE

ExtractInformation 4 5mins 2.5%

Summary 8 8mins 5%

Language 12 12mins 7.5%

Comparison 16 20mins 10%

Writingto presentapointofview

24 forcontent16 forSPAG

45mins 25%

Inyourreadingpaperyourtimingisveryimportant.Spend15minutesreadingthetextandthen…

Again,lookhowbigaweightingthelasttwoquestionsarecomparedtothefirsttasks– itisvitalthatyouareleaving

enoughtimeforthese.

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LanguagePaper2– ExtractAThisoneisamodernaccount…TouchingtheVoid

ByJoeSimpson

JoeSimpsonandhisfellowclimberSimonYatessuccessfullyclimbedtothesummitoftheremoteSiulaGrandemountaininthePeruvianAndes.However,duringthedescentJoebrokehisleg.ConvincedJoewasdead,SimoncuttheropethatjoinedthemtogetherandJoefellintoacrevasse…

Iglancedattheropestretchedtautlyaboveme.Itranupthewallanddisappearedontotheslopeabove.Therewasnopossibilityofgettingbacktothatslopesometwentyfeetaboveme.Ilookedatthewallofthecrevasseclosebymyshoulder.Ontheothersideanotherwalloficetowereduptenfeetaway.Iwashanginginashaftofwaterice.ThedecisiontolookdowncameasIwasintheprocessofturning.Iswungroundquickly,catchingmysmashedkneeontheicewallandhowlinginafrenzyofpainandfright.Insteadofseeingtheropetwistinglooselyinavoidbeneathme,Istaredblanklyatthesnowbelowmyfeet,notfullybelievingwhatIwasseeing.Afloor!Therewasawidesnow-coveredfloorfifteenfeetbelowme.Therewasnoemptiness,andnoblackvoid.Isworesoftly,andhearditwhisperoffthewallsaroundme.ThenIletoutacryofdelightandreliefwhichboomedroundthecrevasse.Iyelledagainandagain,listeningtotheechoes,andlaughedbetweentheyells.Iwasatthebottomofthecrevasse.

WhenIrecoveredmywitsIlookedmorecarefullyatthecarpetofsnowabovewhichIwasdangling.MyjubilationwasquicklytemperedwhenIspotteddarkmenacingholesinthesurface.Itwasn’tafloorafterall.Thecrevasseopenedupintoapear-shapeddome,itssidescurvingawayfrommetoawidthoffiftyfeetbeforenarrowingagain.Thesnowfloorcutthroughtheflatendofthiscavern,whilethewallsabovemetaperedintoformthethinendofthepearbarelytenfeetacrossandnearly100feethigh.Smallfragmentsofcrustysnowpatterneddownfromtheroof.

Ilookedroundtheenclosedvaultofsnowandice,familiarisingmyselfwithitsshapeandsize.Thewallsoppositeclosedinbutdidn’tmeet.Anarrowgaphadbeenfilledwithsnowfromabovetoformaconewhichroseallthewaytotheroof.Itwasaboutfifteenfeetwideatthebaseandaslittleasfourorfivefeetacrossthetop.

Apillarofgoldlightbeameddiagonallyfromasmallholeintheroof,sprayingbrightreflectionsoffthefarwallofthecrevasse.Iwasmesmerisedbythisbeamandsunlightburningthroughthevaultedceilingfromtherealworldoutside.IthadmesofixatedthatIforgotabouttheuncertainfloorbelowandletmyselfslidedowntherestoftherope.Iwasgoingtoreachthatsunbeam.Iknewitthenwithabsolutecertainty.HowIwoulddoit,andwhenIwouldreachitwerenotconsidered.Ijustknew.

Insecondsmywholeoutlookhadchanged.Thewearyfrightenedhoursofnightwereforgotten,andtheabseilwhichhadfilledmewithsuchclaustrophobicdreadhadbeensweptaway.ThetwelvedespairinghoursIhadspentintheunnaturalhushofthisawesomeplaceseemedsuddenlytohavebeennothinglikethenightmareIhadimagined.Icoulddosomethingpositive.Icouldcrawlandclimb,andkeepondoingsountilIhadescapedfromthisgrave.Before,therehadbeennothingformetodoexceptlieonthebridgetryingnottofeelscaredandlonely,andthathelplessnesshadbeenmyworstenemy.NowIhadaplan.

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LanguagePaper2– ExtractBAndthisone’sabout100yearsold…ExtractfromCaptain

Scott’sDiaryIn1911-1912ScottledanexpeditiontotheSouthPole.AfterreachingthePole,theyfaceda700miletrekbacktotheirbasecamp.Theweatherconditionsdeterioratedterribly,andthemenweakenedforwantoffoodandwater.Theydiedintheirtentandthisdiarywasdiscoveredmonthslaterwiththeirbodies.

February2nd,1911ImpressionsTheseductivefoldsofthesleeping-bag.Thehissoftheprimusandthefragrantsteamofthecookerissuingfromthetentventilator.Thesmallgreententandthegreatwhiteroad.Thewhineofadogandtheneighofoursteeds.Thedrivingcloudofpowderedsnow.Thecrunchoffootstepswhichbreakthesurfacecrust.Thewindblownfurrows.Thebluearchbeneaththesmokycloud.Thecrispringoftheponies’hoofsandtheswishofthefollowingsledge.Thedroningconversationofthemarchasthedriverencouragesorchideshishorse.Thepatterofdogpads.Thegentleflutterofourcanvasshelter.Itsdeepboomingsoundunderthefullforceofablizzard.Thedriftsnowlikefinestflourpenetratingeveryholeandcorner– flickeringupbeneathone’sheadcovering,prickingsharplyasasandblast.Thesunwithblurredimagepeepingshylythroughthewreathingdriftgivingpaleshadowless light.Theeternalsilenceofthegreatwhitedesert.Cloudycolumnsofsnowdriftadvancingfromthesouth,paleyellowwraiths,heraldingthecomingstorm,blottingoutonebyonethesharp-cutlinesoftheland.Theblizzard,Nature’sprotest– thecrevasse,Nature’spitfall– thatgrimtrapfortheunwary– nohuntercouldconcealhissnaresoperfectly– thelightrippledsnowbridgegivesnohintorsignofthehiddendanger,itspositionunguessable tillmanorbeastisfloundering,clawingandstrugglingforfootholdonthebrink.Thevastsilencebrokenonlybythemellowsoundsofthemarchingcolumn.

Saturday,March25th,1911Wehavehadtwodaysofsurprisinglywarmweather,theskyovercast,snowfalling,windonlyinlightairs.Lastnighttheskywasclearing,withasoutherlywind,andthismorningtheseawasopenallaboutus.Itisdisappointingtofindtheicesoreluctanttohold;atthesametimeonesupposesthatthecoolingofthewaterisproceedingandthereforethateachdaymakesiteasierfortheicetoform–thesunseemstohavelostallpower,butIimagineitsraysstilltendtowarmthesurfacewateraboutthenoonhours.ItisonlyaweeknowtothedatewhichIthoughtwouldseeusallatCapeEvans.

Thewarmthoftheairhasproducedacomparativelyuncomfortablestateofaffairsinthehut.Theiceontheinnerroofismeltingfast,drippingonthefloorandstreamingdownthesides.Theincreasing

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LanguagePaper2– ExtractBcoldischeckingtheevilevenasIwrite.Comfortcouldonlybeensuredinthehuteitherbymakingacleansweepofalltheceilingiceorbykeepingtheinterioratacriticaltemperaturelittleabovefreezing-point.

Sunday,March17th,1912Losttrackofdates,butthinkthelastcorrect.Tragedyallalongtheline.Atlunch,thedaybeforeyesterday,poorTitusOatessaidhecouldn’tgoon;heproposedweshouldleavehiminhissleeping-bag.Thatwecouldnotdo,andinducedhimtocomeon,ontheafternoonmarch.Inspiteofitsawfulnatureforhimhestruggledonandwemadeafewmiles.Atnighthewasworseandweknewtheendhadcome.

ShouldthisbefoundIwantthesefactsrecorded.Oates’lastthoughtswereofhisMother,butimmediatelybeforehetookprideinthinkingthathisregimentwouldbepleasedwiththeboldwayinwhichhemethisdeath.Wecantestifytohisbravery.Hehasborneintensesufferingforweekswithoutcomplaint,andtotheverylastwasableandwillingtodiscussoutsidesubjects.Hedidnot–wouldnot– giveuphopetotheveryend.Hewasabravesoul.Thiswastheend.Hesleptthroughthenightbeforelast,hopingnottowake;buthewokeinthemorning– yesterday.Itwasblowingablizzard.Hesaid,‘Iamjustgoingoutsideandmaybesometime.’Hewentoutintotheblizzardandwehavenotseenhimsince.

Marks:4Time:5mins

Need:4shadedboxesSkill:ExtractingInformation

Question1GuideSameasbefore,niceeasyquestionto

startwith.

Justlikepaper1,thisisjustaquicksnappyonetogetyourfeetunderthetable.Donotspendlongonit!

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1) ReadagainthefirstparagraphofSourceA.

Choosefourstatementsbelowwhicharetrue.Shadetheboxesoftheonesthatyouthinkaretrue.

[4 marks]

A. Theropeabovehimwasloose. ð

B. Hecouldnotseetheendoftherope. ð

C. Hecouldhaveclimbedbackuptherope. ð

D. Hewasn’tbraveenoughtolookatthesnowwallbyhim. ð

E. Hewassuspendedinachuteofwaterice. ð

F. Hehithiselbowasheturnedandhescreamedinpain. ð

G. Therewasafloorofsnowbelowhim. ð

H. Hewasdelightedtoseesnowfifteenfeetbelowhim. ð

Question1– YourGo!

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YouneedtorefertoSourceAandSourceBforthisquestion.

Bothpeopledealwiththelossoftheirteammemberindifferentways.

Usedetailsfrombothsourcestowriteasummaryofthedifferentwaysthepeopledealwiththelossoftheirteammember.

(8marks)

Yourquestionwilllookabitlikethis….

Marks:8Time:8 mins

Need:2– 3PEEEEparagraphs

Skill:Summarising

Question2GuideThisisasmashandgrabquestion

thisone.Noextramarksbeingfancyanddetailedhere.Getin,getit

done,getout.

Thisisjust5%ofyourGCSE– it’seasytogetboggeddowninit.Don’t.

Edna’sTopTips• KnowthePEEstructureand

aimfor3-4bitsofsmallevidencefromeachsource.

• OneparagraphonsourceAfollowedbyoneonsourceB

Edna’sStrategyWhenyouread,ineachtextunderline2or3linesofevidencethatinformyouaboutthetopicinquestion.Ifyoufindmorethen2or3,pickthepointsthatyoudon’tthinkeveryoneelsewillsay.Beunique.

Point – Introducehowonemanreactstotheloss.

Then,short,snappyandregular…Evidence– Relevantevidencetomatch.Explain– Onesentenceexplanationofwhatyouinferfromthis.

Youneedtofollowthisstructureineachparagraph…

Scottstrugglestocometotermswiththelossofhisteammate, andgivestheimpressionthatthelossofTitusupsetthewholetravellingparty, fortherewas“tragedyallalongtheline.”Hefeelsanloyaltyandclosefriendshipwiththedeceased,forwhenheaskedtobeleftinhissleepingbag, Scottadmits“thatwecouldnotdo.”Scottcan’tquiteacceptthathisfriendhasgone,forhesays“wehavenotseenhimsince,”demonstratingadegreeofhopethathemayyetreturn.

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YouneedtorefertoSourceAandSourceBforthisquestion.

Bothpeopledealwiththelossoftheirteammemberindifferentways.

Usedetailsfrombothsourcestowriteasummaryofthedifferentwaysthepeopledealwiththelossoftheirteammember.

(8marks)

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Question2- Yourgo!

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Question2- Yourgo!

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Self-Assess

MarkSchemePerceptive,Detailed(7-8)Showsadetailedunderstandingofdifferencebetweenthesituations• Offersperceptiveinterpretationofbothtexts• Synthesisesevidencebetweentexts• SelectsarangeofjudiciousquotationsfrombothtextsClear,relevant(5-6)Showsaclearunderstandingofdifferencesbetweenthesituations• Beginstointerpretbothtexts• Demonstratesclearconnectionsbetweentexts• Selectsrelevantquotations/referencesfrombothtextstosupportresponseSome,attempts(3-4)Identifiessomedifferencesbetweenthesituations• Attemptssomeinferencefromone/bothtexts• Attemptstolinkevidencebetweentexts• Selectssomequotations/references;notalwayssupporting(fromone/bothtexts)

Iwouldgivemyself_____marks.ToimprovenexttimeIneedto:

Inthisquestion,Imustrememberto:

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YounowneedtoreferonlytoSourceA,paragraphs2,3and4.

Howdoesthewriteruselanguagetodescribethecrevasse?(12marks)

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Question3- Yourgo!Thisisanotherlanguagequestion(likeQ2onpaper1)andyouansweritinexactlythesameway.Theonlydifferenceis:thisoneisworth12marks.Reviewmytipsandstructuresinpaper1andgiveitago…

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Question3- Yourgo!

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Self-Assess

MarkScheme

Perceptive,Detailed(10-12)Showsperceptiveanddetailedunderstandingofstructure• Analysestheeffectsofthewriter’schoiceofstructuralfeatures.• Selectsarangeofjudiciousquotations• Usesarangeofsubjectterminologyappropriately.Clear,relevant(7-9)Showsclearunderstandingofstructure• Clearlyexplainstheeffectsofwriterschoicesofstructuralfeatures.• Selectsrelevantquotations• Usessubjectterminologyaccurately.Some,attempts(4-6)Showssomeunderstandingofstructure• Attemptstocommentontheeffectofstructuralfeatures• Selectssomerelevantquotations• Usessomesubjectterminology,notalwaysappropriately

Iwouldgivemyself_____marks.ToimprovenexttimeIneedto:

Inthisquestion,Imustrememberto:

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Bothtextsgiveaccountsofexperiencesinextremeconditions.Comparehowthetwoexplorerspresenttheiropinionsoftheextremeconditions.

Inyouranswer,youshould:• Comparetheirdifferentopinionsoftheconditions.• Comparethemethodstheyusetoconveytheirattitudes• Supportyourideaswithquotationsfrombothtexts.

[16marks]

Yourquestionwilllookabitlikethis….

Marks:16Time:20mins

Need:Anintroduction,4– 6PEEZLs

Skill:Comparison

Question4GuideItisveryeasytogetlostinthis

one– butifyouattackitmethodically,youwillbefine.

Thisis10%ofyourwholeGCSE– soitisreallyimportantthatyougiveitagoodchunkoftime

andyourfullapplication.

Edna’sTopTips• Youmust,mustknowthesamebankofwriter’smethodsforthisquestion.As

wellasthelanguagefeaturesandstructuralfeaturesalreadyexplored,learnthoseonthenextpageasastartingpoint.

• KnowthePEEZLstructureandaimfor4-6in20minutes.• Theexaminerlovesitwhenyoucanoffermultipleanddifferingpointsofview.

Whenyoumakeapoint,youneedtoconsidering:Whatelse?Canthisevidenceargueagainstthistoo?Arethereadditionalinterpretations?

• Itisparamountthatyouarecomparing:makereferencetofeaturesofsimilarityanddifferenceandlinkyourparagraphstogetherthroughout.

Edna’sStrategy• Whilstyoureadthroughtheextract,highlight3or4bitsofevidence

fromeachtextthatpresentstheiropinionoftheconditions.• Then,selectthe‘richquotes’– theonesthathaveclearwriters

methodsinthemthatyoucanpickoutandexplain.• Startwithanintroduction.Giveyouroverallview,consideringthe

textasawhole.Allyourpointsgoingforwardwilllinkbacktothisoverallviewandbecomeincreasinglyspecificasyoumovethrough.

Thisquestionisallaboutthewriterspurpose.Whatdotheywanttotellusabouttheconditions?

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Bothwritersregardtheextremeconditionsindifferentways:InsourceA,Simpsonseestheconditionsasachallengetoovercomeandasaviourinhisperil,whereasScottfluctuatesbetweenappreciationofthebeautyoftheenvironment,andarecognitionit’shostilityanddanger.

Scotthasaparticularappreciationforthescaleofthewhitelandscapeandtheopportunitiesthatthispresentshim,asdemonstratedthroughhisfocuson“thesmallgreententandthegreatwhiteroad.”Thefactheisabletoidentifythejuxtapositionbetweenhisminimalshelterandthehugewhiteexpanse,withoutsuggestionofconcern,highlightsthatheiscomfortablewiththeextremeconditionsatthistime.Havingthisfocusaspartofanincrementallistdemonstratesthemultiplethingsheadmiresabouttheplace,andhedoesnotneedtocloudthespecificreferencestothebeautywithanyfurtherimageryorcomplications. Themetaphorof“road”suggestionsopportunityandacontinuationofajourney–highlightingthattheconditionsaresomethingtobeembracedandnotshunned.

ThisissimilartoSimpsonforhealsoembracesthedifficultenvironmentbecause….

Pointandevidence – Makeapointabouttheiropinionwithevidence.Explanation– whatdoesthisquotetellusabouttheiropinion?Zoom onwriter’smethods– Howdothewriter’smethodscommunicatethisopinion?Link– Howisthissimilarordifferenttotheothertext?

Youneedtofollowthisstructureineachparagraph…

Belowisanexampleparagraph.Eachlinehasbeencolouredtomatcheachrequirementabove.

Question4Guide

EdwardtheAQAExaminersays:

Introductiongivesanoverviewofthe

opinionsandfocusesspecificallyonthe

writer andnotthetext.

Developedexplanationwithmorethenone

comment.

Focusonwriter’smethodsbeyondjustlanguagechoices.

Explorationofconnotationsofkeywordswithadditionalinferenceofattitude.

Identificationofsimilarity/difference

inlink

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Bothtextsgiveaccountsofexperiencesinextremeconditions.Comparehowthetwoexplorerspresenttheiropinionsoftheextremeconditions.

Inyouranswer,youshould:• Comparetheirdifferentopinionsoftheconditions.• Comparethemethodstheyusetoconveytheirattitudes• Supportyourideaswithquotationsfrombothtexts.

[16marks]

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Question4- Yourgo!

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Question4- Yourgo!

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Self-Assess

MarkScheme

Perceptive,Detailed(13-16)• Showsadetailedunderstandingofthedifferencesbetweentheideasand

perspectives• Comparesideasandperspectivesinaperceptiveway• AnalyseshowmethodsareusedtoconveyideasandperspectivesClear,relevant(9-12)• Showsaclearunderstandingofdifferencesbetweentheideasandperspectives• Comparesideasandperspectivesinaclearandrelevantway• ExplainsclearlyhowmethodsareusedtoconveyideasandperspectivesSome,attempts(5-8)• Identifiessomedifferencesbetweentheideasandperspectives• Attemptstocompareideasandperspectives• Somecommentonhowmethodsareusedtoconveyideasandperspectives

Iwouldgivemyself_____marks.ToimprovenexttimeIneedto:

Inthisquestion,Imustrememberto:

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Boxingisnothingshortofbarbaric.It’sbrutalbeyondanydefinitionofsport.Asportissomethingthatanyonecanbeapartof;it’ssafe,ithasrules,ithaswinnersandthelosersgetthechancetohaveanothergo.Toomanytimesboxingfallsfouloftheseprinciples.Onlylastmonth,ChrisEubankJuniorputamaninacomaintheboxingringandhewillneverfightagain– that’shiscareer,hislivelihoodandhislifegoalsmashedtosmithereenslikeaboxingglovetothejawline.Anyvictorygainedbytherelentlesssmashingofonesskullmustsurelyfeelhollow– whereisthegenuineintelligenceandskillinthis?Yetthishappensnightafternightinthelituptheatresofpainacrosstheglobe.It’slikeromangladiatorfightsneverstopped– wejustreplacedaggerswithhandsandpretendthatit’sallagame.

Forthebodyofyourexplanation,youneedtouseopinionsandwichparagraphs:

Belowisanexampleopinionsandwichparagraph.Theopeningandclosingopinionsareinred.CanyouspotalloftheSHOWOFF

techniques?

SHOWOFF• Specific

Information• How• Organised

Information• 5Ws• Opinions• Facts• Figures

Short,powerfulstatementofyourpointofview.

Emotivelanguagetodeclareyourpointofview,hopefullyusingametaphor,simile,hyperboleorimagery.

Usethetechniquestoexplaintofullydevelopyouropinion

Question5- GuideStructuringyouranswer

Itisvitalthatyougoawayandlearnthedifferentfeaturesofthedifferenttextsyoumaybeaskedtowrite,forexample:articles,lettersandspeeches.

However,asageneralrule,itisgoodtodothefollowing:1. Introduction– introduceyourtopicandyourpointofview.

2. OpinionSandwiches– seenextpage!3. Anecdote– apersonalstorythatsupportsyourpointofview.

4. Conclusion– Summariseyourpointofviewemotivelyandpowerfully!

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‘Thereisnopointgoingouttohostileanddangerousenvironmentslikemountainsandthesouthpole,asTVisnowsogoodatbringingusimagesoftheseplacesintoourlivingrooms.”

Writeanarticleforabroadsheetnewspaperinwhichyouexplainyourpointofviewonthisstatement.

(24marksforcontentandorganisation16marksfortechnicalaccuracy)[40marks]________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Question5- Yourgo!

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Question5- Yourgo!

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Band SPAG

Level47-8marks

q Widerangeofpunctuationisusedwithahighlevelofaccuracyq Usesafullrangeofappropriatesentenceformsforeffectq Highlevelofaccuracyinspelling,includingambitiousvocabularyq Extensiveandambitioususeofvocabulary

Level35-6marks

q Rangeofpunctuationisused,mostlywithsuccessq Usesavarietyofsentenceformsforeffectq Generallyaccuratespelling,includingcomplexandirregularwordsq Increasinglysophisticateduseofvocabulary

Level23-4marks

q Somecontrolofarangeofpunctuationq Attemptsavarietyofsentenceformsq Someaccuratespellingofmorecomplexwordsq Varieduseofvocabulary

Level11-2marks

q Someevidenceofconsciouspunctuationq Simplerangeofsentenceformsq Accuratebasicspellingq Simpleuseofvocabulary

SELFASSESSMENT

Nexttime,Ineedto….

ThefocusformySPAGneedstobe…

Band ContentandOrganisation

Convincing,Compelling10-12marks

q Registerisconvincinglymatchedto audienceq Convincinglymatchedtopurposeq Extensivevocabularywithevidence ofconsciouscraftingoflinguistic devicesq Variedandeffectivestructural featuresq Writingishighlyengaging,witha rangeofdevelopedcomplexideasq Consistentlycoherentparagraphs withintegrateddiscoursemarkers

Consistent,Clear7-9marks

q Registerisgenerallymatchedto audienceq Generallymatchedtopurposeq Vocabularyclearlychosenforeffect andappropriateuseoflinguistic devicesq Usuallyeffectiveuseofstructural featuresq Writingisengaging,witharangeof connectedideasq Usuallycoherentparagraphswith rangeofdiscoursemarkers

Some Success4-6marks

q Attemptstomatchregisterto audienceq Attemptstomatchpurposeq Beginstovaryvocabularywithsome useoflinguisticdevicesq Attemptstousestructuralfeaturesq Somelinkedandrelevantideasq Attempttowriteinparagraphswith somediscoursemarkers,notalways appropriate

Simple,Limited1-3marks

q Occasionalsenseofaudienceq Occasionalsenseofpurposeq Simplevocabularyq Limitedornoevidenceofstructural featuresq Oneortwounlinkedideasq Noparagraphs

Thefocusformycontentneedstobe….

Mark Level

Question5(bothpapers)