lucky lights obituary

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{ } “Lucky Light, infamous candy cigarette discontinued at age 90”

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The sytrical obituary of childern targetted candy cigarettes.

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Page 1: Lucky Lights Obituary

{ }“Lucky Light, infamous candy cigarette discontinued at age 90”

Page 2: Lucky Lights Obituary

Lucky Light, infamous candy cigarette discontinued at age 90

After years of manipulating impressionable minors to

be, Lucky light was officially taken off of the production

line this past week amidst new sales regulations. Filled

with gum, chocolate, or simply tapioca, lucky, also

known as “Kings,” “Stallion,” or “Just like Dad” enabled

many generations of eager children to look like “grown

ups.” Over the years his shape, color, and texture

changed, gradually appearing less realistic. What was

once his rolled paper exterior became nothing more

than a shriveled up and unclothed white sugar stick.

So little remained of lucky that the government decided

it was time to send him to that great candy store in the

sky.

Big tobacco played a key role in his longevity, grant-

ing branding permission to companies like Necco

and World Candies. Born in the 1900s, Lucky light

was often called by the same names as his tar filled

cousins: Lucky Strike, Camel, and Cools. Eventually

he branched out from the family business collaborating

with characters like Popeye and the gritty ‘Round Up’

Cowboy.

Ever the chameleon, lucky was forced to assume vari-

ous disguises as the health risks of smoking began to

surface towards the early 1950s. As a “Lucky Strike;”

he legally changed his name to “Lucky Light.” His as-

sociate, “Pall Mall” became known as “Kings.” Suc-

cessful in transformation, he rapidly gained popularity

with a new generation. Lucky’s previous generation of

fans remained nostalgic especially while lighting their

“real” cigarettes.

In fact, years later, when those “real” cigarettes were

banned from public buildings and transportation, lucky

earned an unexpected promotion. In the 1990s, the

airline company Cathay Pacific began handing him

out on flights to the United States with the follow-

ing disclaimer: “Captain’s Warning: flying onboard a

nonsmoking flight can be addictive and can lead to

increased Cathay Pacific travel.”

Lucky will always be remembered for inspiring mil-

lions of aspiring smokers to “light up” with his sweet

strawberry flavor. He is survived by “chewing tobacco”

baseball gum and the chocolate cigar. Lucky’s rela-

tives in the tobacco industry have organized memorial

services in off-kilter candy stores all over the world.

Page 3: Lucky Lights Obituary
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