optimist international1 mentoring how to build & nurture a relationship
TRANSCRIPT
Optimist International 1
Mentoring
HOW TO BUILD & NURTUREA RELATIONSHIP
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ICE BREAKER –Soap Opera Name
First name = your middle name
Last name = your street’s name
EXAMPLE:
Sara Michelle Evans who lives on Sycamore Drive =
Michelle Sycamore
Let’s get acquainted!
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WHAT WE WILL COVER
How Mentoring Creates Success
When Mentoring Works
Communication is the Key
Personality StylesRight/Left Brain
ThinkingChoosing a
Mentor/Protégé
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Mentoring in the Past
Odysseus asked his TRUSTED friend, MENTOR, to look after his son.
MENTOR watched over him for almost ten years; this is how the word MENTOR was derived.
WISE and TRUSTED TEACHER or COUNSELOR.
Traditionally role fulfilled by Father
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Protégé
Old French Word “proteger”
To protect
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Past Mentors
Sigmund Freud to Carl Jung
Merlin to King Arthur
Aristotle to Alexander
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Motivation – 1920’s
Mayo asked teams “What do you want?”
Answer:1. Sense of
Purpose2. Feeling of
Success3. Happiness
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Motivation – 1930’s-40’s
Maslow asked individuals “What do you want?”
Answer:1. Sense of
Purpose2. Feeling of
Success3. Happiness
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Motivation – 1950’s
General Foods Corporation combined philosophies by encouraging teamwork with focused interpersonal communication.
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Motivation – 1990’s
Teenage boys asked
“What do you want?” Answer:
1. Pizza
2. Car
3. Brittany Spears
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Types of Mentoring
Primary & Secondary Structured &
Informal Active & Passive Short & Long Term Group Mentors Societal Vocational
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Modern Day Examples
Sandra Day O’Conner – Harry Rathburn
Everett Koop – Ray Nash
Bill Blass – Baron Nicholas De Gunzburg
Tom Landry – Mike Ditka, Dan Reeves
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For Protégé, a Mentor Can
OPEN DOORS
SAVE TIME & MONEY
REDUCE FRUSTRATION
SHARING
COACH & ADVISOR
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For Mentors …
A WAY OF GIVING BACK
ENHANCE PERFORMANCE
SOW SEEDS OF LEADERSHIP
KEEP MENTOR SHARP AND CURRENT
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Mentoring –WHEN IT WORKS
Needs to be a REWARD - does not need to be monetary. WIIFM - What’s In It For Me?
Protégé – knowledge, contacts Mentor – help future leader
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COMMUNICATION IS KEY
Mentoring works best when mentor and protégé are compatible. Use an informal PERSONALITY CHECK prior to agreement.
Two-way communication is necessary.
Mentor – adviseProtégé - goals
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Tips to Listen Better
A. Listen Between Words
B. Active/Visual Listening
C. Be involved – ask questions
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TO BE A BETTER SPEAKER
Ask open questions
Mentors need to learn how to confront proteges in non-threatening, constructive manner
Concentrate on how you make your protege feel rather than teaching a lesson.
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THREE MODES OF LEARNING
1. Visual - allows the protégé to acquire information with his/her eyes (visual cues, likes to read books and receive email)
2. Auditory - processing information with the ears (personal stories, motivational tapes)
3. Kinesthetic/experiential - enjoy tours, field trips and other types of interpersonal networking, such as Optimist meetings.
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Personality Styles
Importance• Develop relationship• Motivation• Understanding
Tests• Myers-Briggs• Leadership Styles &
Profiles
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Spectrum of Human Behavior
Non-direct Direct
Non-Direct is shy or hesitant
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Personality Test
Supportive Empathic Cheerleader
Controlling Hide emotions Dictate rather
than reactControlling
Supportive
No right or wrong!
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Four Styles - Example
Non-direct
Controlling
Supportive
Direct
R S
T D
X
X
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R – “Relater”
Friendly – big hearts Concerned with
feelings Good encouragers Tell you what you
want to hear Avoids Bad News
Half full – would you like some?
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S – “Socializer”
Like to have FUN
Good Time Party people Not taken
seriously
Who cares?
Let’s drink it!
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D – “Director”
Leaders; in charge Concerned with:
Efficiency Productivity
Sometimes lacking: People skills Etiquette Tact
Look into this and get back to me!
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T – “Thinker”
Best decisions Strengths
Analysis Critical
Thinking Weakness
OveranalyzesNo enemies, but
friends hate them.
It’s too close to tell.
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LEFT/RIGHT BRAIN THINKING
Judging Perceiving
Seeks closure Seeks open options
Prefer filing systems Prefers piling systems
Makes lists, uses them Makes lists, loses them
Organized Comfortable
Problem oriented People oriented
Prefers clarity Prefers harmony
Rationally based Emotionally based
Male Female
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Choosing a Mentor
1. Personal Examination Goals Kind of person Personal or
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Choosing a Mentor
2. Ideal Mentor is compatible with: Personality
Style Learning Mode Left or Right
Brained
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Choosing a Mentor
3. Create a list
4. Investigate
5. Ask someone Identify their WIIFM Follow up Recognize
6. Formalize agreement
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Why Choose a Protégé
“You can get what you want if you help enough people get what they want.”
Zig Zigler
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Choosing a Protégé
Self Examination
1. Skill or Experience
2. Willing to give time
3. Able to commit
4. Former Protégé
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Choosing a Protégé
Best Qualities of Protégé1. Defined Goals2. Willing to be directed3. Asks & accepts help4. Listens to others5. Follows instructions6. Grateful7. Self-confident8. Follows through
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CONGRATULATIONS
You are on your way to one of the most satisfying and productive relationships you will ever experience.
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In Closing
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