page 4, the estill county tribune, january 4, 2017 our ... · 6135 winchester road irvine, kentucky...

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6135 Winchester Road Irvine, Kentucky 40336-8517 Phone (606) 723-5012, Fax (606) 723-2743 Email: <[email protected]> Published on Wednesdays by Tracy Randall Patrick Delores L. Rowland, Editor Subscription Prices Estill $17, Adj. Counties $28, Elsewhere $32 Periodicals Postage Paid, Irvine, KY 40336 (Permit #685-890) POSTMASTER: Send address changes to: The Estill Co. Tribune, 6135 Winchester Rd. Irvine, Kentucky 40336-8517 Our 35th Year Serving Estill County! Member of Kentucky Press Association <EstillTribune.Com> Page 4, The Estill County Tribune, January 4, 2017 Owlhead’s Grocery South Irvine * 723-7473 Pet & Livestock Feed Corn 50 Lbs Cracked Corn 50 Lbs Horse Feed 50 Lbs Rabbit Pellets 50 Lbs 40% Hog Supplement 50 Lbs Pig & Show 18% 50 Lbs Starter & Grower 25 Lbs Starter & Grower 25 Lbs Layer Pellets 50 Lbs Dog Food 50 Lbs Mineral Block 50 Lbs Salt Block 50 Lbs Fly Block Trace Mineral Salt 50 Lbs Pebble Lime 50 Lbs Pride Dog Food 50 Lbs Dry Molasses 50 Lbs Other Feeds Also Available Owlhead’s Grocery South Irvine * Phone 723-7473 Donald & Katherine Dixon, Owners We’re open until 10:00 p.m. We Sell Feeds by Producer Homeless Man A man is walking down main street when he is approached by a rather dirty, shabby-looking homeless man who asks him for a couple of dollars for something to eat. The man takes a ten dollar bill from his billfold and says, “I guess you’re just going to buy beer with this money?” “No,” says the homeless man. “I stopped drinking years ago.” “Will you be using it to go fishing?” the man asks. “No, I don’t waste time fishing,” the homeless man says. “I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive.” “Will you spend this on greens fees at a golf course instead of food?” the man asks. “Are you NUTS!” replies the homeless man. “I haven’t played golf in 20 years!” “Will you be spending the money on a wayward woman instead of food?” the man asks. “No way!” replies the man. “I need the money for food.” “I’m going to give you the money,” says the man, “But, my wife’s waiting for me, and I want her to meet you first.” “Why?” asks the homeless man. “I know I’m dirty, and I prob- ably smell disgusting.” “That’s true, the man replies, “But I just want her to see what a man looks like that goes without beer, fishing, golf, and sex.” Motel Stay Acouple is traveling by car from Michigan to Key West, Florida. After many hours on the road, they decide to stop for a rest at a motel near Atlanta. They sleep for about four hours and are ready to get back on the road. When they go to check out, the desk clerk hands them a bill for $350.00. The man explodes and demands to know why the charge is so high. He tells the clerk although it’s a nice hotel, the rooms cer- tainly aren’t worth $350.00. The clerk explains that the hotel has an Olympic-sized pool and a huge conference center. “But we didn’t use them,” the man complains. “Well, they are here, and you could have.” The clerk goes on to explain they could have taken in one of the shows for which the hotel is famous. “The best entertainers from NewYork, Hollywood and Las Vegas perform here.” “But we didn’t go to any of those shows!” says the man. “Well, we have them, and you could have,” says the clerk, and goes on to tell of all the other things available at the motel. Each time, the man says, “But we didn’t use them!” and the clerk replies, “Well, they are here, and you could have.” Finally, the man writes out a check and hands it to the clerk. The clerk looks at the check and says, “But, sir, this check is only made out for $50.00.” “That’s correct,” says the man. “I charged you $300.00 for sleep- ing with my wife.” “But I didn’t!” exclaims the clerk. Well,” the man replies. “She was here, and you could have.” Job Applicant Mujibar is applying for a job. He has passed all of the tests except one. The resource officer tells him, “Make a sentence using the words, yellow, pink and green.” Mujibar thinks for a few minutes and says, “The telephone goes ‘green, green . . . green, green . . . green, green.’ I pink it up and say, ‘Yellow, this is Mujibar.’” He got the job. You’ve probably spoken to him. He’s the guy you talk to when you call about problems with your computer. Jumping the Broomstick Howard Green stops by to give Pa some good news. “Pa,” says Howard, “Have you heard? I may be getting married to that girl I’ve been seeing from over in town.” “Is that so?” says Pa. “Well, I’d think really hard on that one before I made any moves. From what I hear, she’s already been married seven times.” “Well, actually, eight,” says Howard. “But she says this one is the real thing.” “Well, I’m not so sure about that,” says Pa. “From what I hear, she’s caught her own bouquet at her last two weddings.” New Rooster Farmer Green’s old rooster dies, so he goes down the creek to a farm that raises a lot of chickens. The guy there tells him, he has just the one. He shows Green a rooster named Floyd and tells Green that Floyd will handle the situation. Floyd the rooster costs a lot of money, but Greens buys him any- way and takes him back to the farm where he sets him out in the barnyard. Floyd immediately takes off after the hens. Green feels like everything will be okay, but when he comes back in the after- noon, Floyd is still chasing the hens and is trying to getting into the pen with the ducks. “Floyd,” says Green. “You’d better slow yourself down.You’re not going to last at this rate.” Sure enough, the next morning, Floyd is nowhere to be found. Green searches out in the field and sees his high-priced rooster’s body stretched out in the grass with buzzards circling around over- head. “Floyd,” says Green. “I told you to pace yourself. I tried to get you to slow down, now look what you’ve done to yourself.” Floyd opens one eye, nods toward the vultures circling in the sky and says, “Shhh! They’re getting closer.” Agriculture Deputy Un- der Secretary Lanon Bac- cam today announced that beginning Jan. 9, 2017, the U.S. Department of Agri- culture (USDA) will offer an early termination oppor- tunity for certain Conserva- tion Reserve Program (CRP) contracts, making it easier to transfer property to the next generation of farmers and ranchers, including family members. The land that is eligible for the early termi- nation is among the least en- vironmentally sensitive land enrolled in CRP. This change to the CRP program is just one of many that USDA has implemented based on recommendations from the Land Tenure Advi- sory Subcommittee formed by Agriculture Secretary Tom Vilsack in 2015. The subcommittee was asked to identify ways the depart- ment could use or modify its programs, regulations, and practices to address the chal- lenges of beginning farmers and ranchers in their access to land, capital and technical assistance. “The average age of prin- cipal farm operators is 58,” said Baccam. “So, land ten- ure, succession and estate planning, and access to land is an increasingly important issue for the future of agricul- ture and a priority for USDA. Access to land remains the biggest barrier for beginning farmers and ranchers. This announcement is part of our efforts to address some of the challenges with transitioning land to beginning farmers.” Baccam made the an- nouncement while touring the Joe Dunn farm in War- ren County, located in cen- tral Iowa near Carlisle. Dunn is the father-in-law to Iowa native and former Marine Aaron White, who with his wife, are prospective can- didates for the early termi- nation program. Baccam was joined by Farm Service Agency Iowa State Execu- tive Director John Whitaker when meeting with Dunn and White. “The chance to give young farmers a better opportunity to succeed when starting a farming career makes per- fect sense,” said Baccam. “There are Conservation Reserve Program acres that are rested and ready to be productive, an original goal of CRP. The technical teams at USDA will tell us which ones can terminate from the program with little impact on the overall conservation efforts. When they do, we’ll be ready to help beginning farmers like military veteran Aaron White.” Normally if a landowner terminates a CRP contract early, they are required to repay all previous payments plus interest. The new pol- icy waives this repayment if the land is transferred to a beginning farmer or rancher through a sale or lease with an option to buy. With CRP enrollment close to the Con- gressionally-mandated cap of 24 million acres, the early termination will also allow USDA to enroll other land with higher conservation value elsewhere. “Starting the next genera- tion of farmers and ranchers out with conservation and stewardship in mind is an- other important part of this announcement,” Baccam said. “The land coming out of CRP will have priority en- rollment opportunities with USDA’s working lands con- servation programs through cooperation between the Farm Service Agency and ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ From U.S. Department of Agriculture ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Making it Easier to Transfer Land to the Next Generation Allows for Transfer of Certain Conservation Reserve Program Land to New Farmers; Provides Priority Enrollment in Working Lands Conservation Programs the Natural Resources Conservation Service.” Acres terminated early from CRP under these land tenure provisions will be eligible for priority enroll- ment consideration into the CRP Grasslands, if eligible; or the Conserva- tion Stewardship Program or Environmental Qual- ity Incentives Program, as determined by the Natural Resources Conservation Service. According to the Tenure, Ownership and Transition of Agricultural Land sur- vey, conducted by USDA in 2014, U.S. farmland owners expect to transfer 93 million acres to new ownership during 2015- 2019. This represents 10 percent of all farmland across the nation. Details on the early termination opportunity will be avail- able starting on Jan. 9, 2017, at local USDA ser- vice centers. For more in- formation about CRP and to find out if your acreage is eligible for early contract termination, contact your local Farm Service Agency (FSA) office or go online at www.fsa.usda.gov/crp. To locate your local FSA office, visit http://offices. usda.gov. Since 2009, USDA has invested more than $29 billion to help producers make conservation im- provements, working with as many as 500,000 farm- ers, ranchers and landown- ers to protect over 400 million acres nationwide, boosting soil and air qual- ity, cleaning and conserv- ing water and enhancing wildlife habitat. For an in- teractive look at USDA’s work in conservation and forestry over the course of this Administration, visit http://medium.com/usda- results.

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6135 Winchester RoadIrvine, Kentucky 40336-8517

Phone (606) 723-5012, Fax (606) 723-2743Email: <[email protected]>

Published on Wednesdays byTracy Randall Patrick

Delores L. Rowland, EditorSubscription Prices

Estill $17, Adj. Counties $28, Elsewhere $32Periodicals Postage Paid, Irvine, KY 40336

(Permit #685-890)POSTMASTER: Send address changes to:The Estill Co. Tribune, 6135 Winchester Rd.

Irvine, Kentucky 40336-8517

Our 35th Year Serving Estill County!

Member of Kentucky Press Association

<EstillTribune.Com>

Page 4, The Estill County Tribune, January 4, 2017

Owlhead’s GrocerySouth Irvine * 723-7473

Pet & Livestock FeedCorn . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .50 Lbs .Cracked Corn . . . . . . . .50 Lbs .Horse Feed . . . . . . . . . .50 Lbs .Rabbit Pellets . . . . . . . .50 Lbs .40% Hog Supplement .50 Lbs .Pig & Show 18% . . . . .50 Lbs .Starter & Grower . . . . .25 Lbs .Starter & Grower . . . . .25 Lbs .Layer Pellets . . . . . . . . .50 Lbs .Dog Food . . . . . . . . . . . .50 Lbs .Mineral Block . . . . . . . .50 Lbs .Salt Block . . . . . . . . . . .50 Lbs .Fly Block . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Trace Mineral Salt . . . .50 Lbs .Pebble Lime . . . . . . . . .50 Lbs .Pride Dog Food . . . . . .50 Lbs .Dry Molasses . . . . . . . .50 Lbs .Other Feeds Also Available

Owlhead’s GrocerySouth Irvine * Phone 723-7473Donald & Katherine Dixon, Owners

We’re open until 10:00 p.m.

We Sell

Feeds by Producer

Homeless Man Amaniswalkingdownmainstreetwhenheisapproachedbyaratherdirty,shabby-lookinghomelessmanwhoaskshimforacoupleofdollarsforsomethingtoeat. Themantakesatendollarbillfromhisbillfoldandsays,“Iguessyou’rejustgoingtobuybeerwiththismoney?” “No,”saysthehomelessman.“Istoppeddrinkingyearsago.” “Willyoubeusingittogofishing?”themanasks. “No,Idon’twastetimefishing,”thehomelessmansays.“Ineedtospendallmytimetryingtostayalive.” “Willyouspendthisongreensfeesatagolfcourseinsteadoffood?”themanasks. “AreyouNUTS!”repliesthehomelessman.“Ihaven’tplayedgolfin20years!” “Willyoubespendingthemoneyonawaywardwomaninsteadoffood?”themanasks. “Noway!”repliestheman.“Ineedthemoneyforfood.” “I’m going to give you the money,” says the man, “But, mywife’swaitingforme,andIwanthertomeetyoufirst.” “Why?”asksthehomelessman.“IknowI’mdirty,andIprob-ablysmelldisgusting.” “That’strue,themanreplies,“ButIjustwanthertoseewhatamanlookslikethatgoeswithoutbeer,fishing,golf,andsex.”

Motel Stay AcoupleistravelingbycarfromMichigantoKeyWest,Florida.Aftermanyhoursontheroad,theydecidetostopforarestatamotelnearAtlanta.Theysleepforaboutfourhoursandarereadytogetbackontheroad.Whentheygotocheckout,thedeskclerkhandsthemabillfor$350.00. Themanexplodesanddemandstoknowwhythechargeissohigh.Hetellstheclerkalthoughit’sanicehotel,theroomscer-tainlyaren’tworth$350.00. TheclerkexplainsthatthehotelhasanOlympic-sizedpoolandahugeconferencecenter. “Butwedidn’tusethem,”themancomplains. “Well,theyarehere,andyoucouldhave.” Theclerkgoesontoexplaintheycouldhavetakeninoneoftheshowsforwhichthehotelisfamous.“ThebestentertainersfromNewYork,HollywoodandLasVegasperformhere.” “Butwedidn’tgotoanyofthoseshows!”saystheman. “Well,wehavethem,andyoucouldhave,”saystheclerk,andgoesontotellofalltheotherthingsavailableatthemotel. Eachtime,themansays,“Butwedidn’tusethem!”andtheclerkreplies,“Well,theyarehere,andyoucouldhave.” Finally,themanwritesoutacheckandhandsittotheclerk. Theclerklooksatthecheckandsays,“But,sir,thischeckisonlymadeoutfor$50.00.” “That’scorrect,”saystheman.“Ichargedyou$300.00forsleep-ingwithmywife.” “ButIdidn’t!”exclaimstheclerk. Well,”themanreplies.“Shewashere,andyoucouldhave.”

Job Applicant Mujibarisapplyingforajob.Hehaspassedallofthetestsexceptone.Theresourceofficer tellshim,“Makeasentenceusing thewords,yellow,pinkandgreen.” Mujibarthinksforafewminutesandsays,“Thetelephonegoes‘green,green...green,green...green,green.’Ipinkitupandsay,‘Yellow,thisisMujibar.’” Hegotthejob.You’veprobablyspokentohim.He’stheguyyoutalktowhenyoucallaboutproblemswithyourcomputer.

Jumping the Broomstick HowardGreenstopsbytogivePasomegoodnews. “Pa,”saysHoward,“Haveyouheard?ImaybegettingmarriedtothatgirlI’vebeenseeingfromoverintown.” “Is thatso?”saysPa.“Well, I’d thinkreallyhardon thatonebeforeImadeanymoves.FromwhatIhear,she’salreadybeenmarriedseventimes.” “Well,actually,eight,”saysHoward.“Butshesaysthisoneistherealthing.” “Well,I’mnotsosureaboutthat,”saysPa.“FromwhatIhear,she’scaughtherownbouquetatherlasttwoweddings.”

New Rooster FarmerGreen’soldroosterdies,sohegoesdownthecreektoa farmthat raisesa lotofchickens.Theguy there tellshim,hehasjusttheone.HeshowsGreenaroosternamedFloydandtellsGreenthatFloydwillhandlethesituation. Floydtheroostercostsalotofmoney,butGreensbuyshimany-wayandtakeshimbacktothefarmwherehesetshimoutinthebarnyard.Floydimmediatelytakesoffafterthehens.Greenfeelslikeeverythingwillbeokay,butwhenhecomesbackintheafter-noon,Floydisstillchasingthehensandistryingtogettingintothepenwiththeducks. “Floyd,”saysGreen.“You’dbetterslowyourselfdown.You’renotgoingtolastatthisrate.” Sureenough,thenextmorning,Floydisnowheretobefound.Greensearchesoutinthefieldandseeshishigh-pricedrooster’sbodystretchedoutinthegrasswithbuzzardscirclingaroundover-head. “Floyd,”saysGreen.“Itoldyoutopaceyourself.Itriedtogetyoutoslowdown,nowlookwhatyou’vedonetoyourself.” Floydopensoneeye,nodstowardthevulturescirclingintheskyandsays,“Shhh!They’regettingcloser.”

Agriculture Deputy Un-der Secretary Lanon Bac-cam today announced thatbeginning Jan. 9, 2017, theU.S. Department of Agri-culture (USDA) will offeran early termination oppor-tunity forcertainConserva-tionReserveProgram(CRP)contracts,makingiteasiertotransferpropertytothenextgeneration of farmers andranchers, including familymembers. The land that iseligible for the early termi-nationisamongtheleasten-vironmentallysensitivelandenrolledinCRP. This change to the CRPprogramisjustoneofmanythatUSDAhasimplementedbased on recommendationsfromtheLandTenureAdvi-sory Subcommittee formedby Agriculture SecretaryTom Vilsack in 2015. Thesubcommittee was askedto identifyways thedepart-mentcoulduseormodifyitsprograms, regulations, andpracticestoaddressthechal-lengesofbeginningfarmersandranchers in theiraccesstoland,capitalandtechnicalassistance. “Theaverageageofprin-cipal farmoperators is58,”saidBaccam.“So,landten-ure, succession and estateplanning,andaccesstolandisanincreasinglyimportantissueforthefutureofagricul-tureandapriorityforUSDA.Access to land remains thebiggestbarrierforbeginningfarmersand ranchers. Thisannouncementispartofoureffortstoaddresssomeofthechallengeswithtransitioninglandtobeginningfarmers.” Baccam made the an-nouncement while touringthe Joe Dunn farm inWar-ren County, located in cen-tralIowanearCarlisle.Dunnis the father-in-law to Iowanative and former Marine

AaronWhite,whowithhiswife, are prospective can-didates for the early termi-nation program. BaccamwasjoinedbyFarmServiceAgency Iowa State Execu-tiveDirectorJohnWhitakerwhen meeting with DunnandWhite. “Thechancetogiveyoungfarmersabetteropportunityto succeed when starting afarming career makes per-fect sense,” said Baccam.“There are ConservationReserve Program acres thatare rested and ready to beproductive, anoriginalgoalofCRP.ThetechnicalteamsatUSDAwill telluswhichonescanterminatefromtheprogram with little impacton the overall conservationefforts.Whentheydo,we’llbe ready to help beginningfarmerslikemilitaryveteranAaronWhite.” Normally if a landownerterminates a CRP contractearly, they are required torepayallpreviouspaymentsplusinterest. Thenewpol-icy waives this repaymentifthelandistransferredtoabeginningfarmerorrancherthroughasaleorleasewithanoptiontobuy.WithCRPenrollmentclosetotheCon-gressionally-mandated capof24millionacres,theearlytermination will also allowUSDA to enroll other landwith higher conservationvalueelsewhere. “Startingthenextgenera-tionoffarmersandranchersout with conservation andstewardship in mind is an-other important part of thisannouncement,” Baccamsaid.“ThelandcomingoutofCRPwillhavepriorityen-rollment opportunities withUSDA’sworkinglandscon-servation programs throughcooperation between theFarm Service Agency and

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------From U.S. Department of Agriculture ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Making it Easier to Transfer Land to the Next GenerationAllows for Transfer of Certain Conservation Reserve Program Land to New Farmers;

Provides Priority Enrollment in Working Lands Conservation Programs the Natural ResourcesConservationService.” Acres terminated earlyfromCRPundertheselandtenure provisions will beeligibleforpriorityenroll-ment consideration intothe CRP Grasslands, ifeligible; or the Conserva-tion Stewardship Programor Environmental Qual-ity IncentivesProgram,asdeterminedbytheNaturalResources ConservationService. AccordingtotheTenure,Ownership and Transitionof Agricultural Land sur-vey, conducted by USDAin 2014, U.S. farmlandowners expect to transfer93 million acres to newownership during 2015-2019. This represents 10percent of all farmlandacross the nation. Detailson the early terminationopportunity will be avail-able starting on Jan. 9,2017, at local USDA ser-

vicecenters.Formore in-formation about CRP andtofindoutifyouracreageiseligibleforearlycontracttermination, contact yourlocalFarmServiceAgency(FSA) office or go onlineat www.fsa.usda.gov/crp.To locate your local FSAoffice, visit http://offices.usda.gov. Since 2009, USDA hasinvested more than $29billion to help producersmake conservation im-provements,workingwithasmanyas500,000farm-ers,ranchersandlandown-ers to protect over 400million acres nationwide,boostingsoilandairqual-ity, cleaning and conserv-ing water and enhancingwildlifehabitat.Foranin-teractive look at USDA’swork in conservation andforestryoverthecourseofthis Administration, visithttp://medium.com/usda-results.