Paper Plates to Silver Spoons

The Complete Guide to Table Manners

Introduction Table manners developed over a long period

of time Manners are different for different cultures Manners should make dining easier Manners promote safety—don’t spill the

soup. Manners prevent you from making

unappetizing, noises (slurp, nose blowing). Don’t embarrass yourself or your host. Learn the basics, common sense will help!

At some point in your dining experience, you need to be on your best behavior!

Date with someone of different ethnic traditions

Wedding receptionBusiness lunch or dinnerJob interviewAny event important to your future

Dining at home alone or with your family Don’t save for important or formal occasion

when important to be on best behavior Bad habits are hard to break; don’t

embarrass your family Learn and practice, practice, practice Form new habits; the right way should

become habit Know what is appropriate in certain situations Important to learn when and how to use

proper manners.

Group Dining

Dining in someone’s home It is courteous to try everything When refusing servings, simply pass along Take small servings to ensure enough for

everyone. If you like, compliment the host and take a

second serving. Do not use your own utensils to serve food.

Formal Dining with Service

Served at someone’s home by servants. Formal dining with serving platters is the most

difficult. The platter is served from the left. Serve your food and return serving utensils to

the platter. Avoid making errors that will end up on your

lap or on the floor.

Formal Dining with Plate Service

Each course will be served individually with the food already on a plate.

Serve on left and remove from the right. If you dislike food or have allergies, be

discrete.

Restaurant Dining

Your place your order; make sure your order something that will not embarrass you while eating in public.

Use different utensils for different foods Etiquette varies greatly depending on the

type of restaurant. Evaluate your environment and let common

sense rule—if you are not sure, follow others.

Being Seated

Cleanliness is very important when eating. Make sure your hands and nails are clean. Your personal appearance should be neat

and appropriate for the dining environment. Males should assist in seating the female to

the right.

Conversation

Converse with someone beside you even if you don’t know them.

Host may have arrange you to be seated next to someone… Interesting. With common interests. With a romantic match.

Posture

Relax. Don’t rock in your chair Don’t slouch. Appear confident and attentive. Elbows—What are others doing in the

situation? Never lean forward with weight on elbows.

Unfolding the Napkin

Unfold and place in lap below the table. Never tuck in shirt.

Place Setting: Placement of Utensils

The number of utensils varies depending on the formality of meal.

Forks on the left of dinner plate. Knives and spoons on the right of the dinner

plate. Start with utensils farthest from the plate. Work from the left to the right.

Use of Utensils

European (2-step method) How you hold your utensils is different

1. Cut the food.– Elbows in, use leverage when cutting.

2. Bring the food to the mouth with fork in the left hand while the knife is in the right hand. You do not have to put the knife down.

Use of Utensils

American (4-step method)How you hold your utensils is different1. Cut the food.2. Place the knife on the plate.3. Switch the fork to the other hand while

turning the fork over.4. Carry food to the mouth.

Use of Utensils

Use a method that allows you to dine neatly without dropping your food.

If you drop utensils, ask for another. Do not retrieve utensils from the floor; leave

it. Don’t’ use utensils when talking; do not use

them as pointers.

Resting Positions

What you do with your utensils when you are taking a break from eating.

Place your knife and fork on the plate with the prongs down to indicate that you are not finished with your meal, but taking a break (chewing food, drinking, talking, or using napkin).

Use of the Napkin

Should be placed on lap under the table when dining.

Only used for wiping the mouth; pat lightly around mouth.

Use the napkin throughout the meal Napkin should be above table only when

using it. When you are finished with meal, place

napkin on table beside plate.

Conversation

Someone has invited you because they enjoy your company—not because you are hungry or they felt the need to

Do not talk with food in your mouth. Avoid getting caught with food in your

mouth by taking small bites.

Conversation

Swallow food before speaking—be considerate.

If it is an emergency, then tuck food in mouth before speaking.

When chewing keep mouth closed with lips tucked together.

Different Stages of a Meal

A DINNER could have as many as 12 courses!

Typical 5 courses Bread Soup Salad Entrée (Protein-based) Dessert Beverage

Beverage

Use finger tips Use handle Tip head back—do not stick your face in the

glass If you spill a drink, play it down—ask for a

sponge or cloth. Do not make a big deal out of it.

Bread

Plan to have some bread at each course. Eat small portions; avoid getting too full. Place on bread plate, if provided, or on the

dinner plate. Place serving of butter on the dish and the

place on the small individual pieces of bread—never apply butter directly on bread

Do not put the butter knife on the table cloth

Soup

Eat quietly and carefully Avoid slurping. Dip soup spoon away from you; tilt bowl

away. Place the soup spoon on the saucer under

the soup bowl.

Salad

Acceptable to cut salad in bite size pieces Use same methods for cutting meat

The Main Course

Knowing table manners mean knowing what is appropriate in different situations

Finger Foods: Remove meat with utensils and then pick up with utensils and the pick up with your fingers.

Bone in your mouth—remove with fingers and place on side of plate—do not make an announcement.

Finished Position

Place knife and fork on the plate parallel to each other and pointing to center of the plate.

The server in a former meal will be aware that you are finished.

Dessert

When served fruit, cake, pie, puddings or desserts with or without ice cream, use whatever utensil you are provided (unless unreasonable).

If you are not sure…see what someone else is doing.

When coffee is served with dessert, place the spoon on saucer, not on the table.

Leaving the Table

It is best to stay until everyone is finished. Place the napkin on table and rise from the

table. Excuse yourself from the table.

Remember

Adapt manners to different kinds of foods. Do what is natural. Do not draw attention to yourself exhibiting

bad manners. Do not make a mess. Use judgment according to dining

atmosphere.

Remember

Avoid unappetizing noise such as burping at the table—excuse yourself.

Eating hot food—if unbearable remove with a napkin with drawing attention to yourself.

If you are not sure about proper etiquette, pause, take a drink, and glance around to see what others around you are doing.

Remember

Be yourself! Enjoy yourself! Relax! Demonstrate confidence and class!