planning for holy matrimony · 1150 west centre ave., portage, michigan 49024 269.327.5165 ...
TRANSCRIPT
1150 West Centre Ave., Portage, Michigan 49024
269.327.5165 www.stcatherinesiena.org
Planning for
Holy Matrimony
Guidelines for Preparation for the Sacrament of Marriage
2
Introduction………………………………………………………………..3
Marriage Preparation……………………………………………...3-5
Planning the wedding……………………………………………….6-7
The Church Environment.…………………………………...……..8
Scripture & Music Selection………….………………………...9
Professional services ……………………………………….…….10
Other considerations……………………………………………….11
Couple Timeline for marriage preparation …………….12
Table of Contents
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We congratulate you on your decision to join with each other in the Sacrament of Marriage. This is a major decision, and we promise our support and our prayers for you both.
Marriage preparation takes place with the engaged couple, parish clergy, and lay parishioners. We entreat you to spend time in preparation because we value marriage and family so highly. We want your marital relationship to be full, holy, and live-giving. This sacrament doesn’t happen only on your wedding day, but is lived out every day.
To begin preparation, please contact Marianne Verner, our office supervisor, who will assist you and answer your questions. Later in the process, a wedding assistant will help plan the ceremony itself.
Tricia Tetzlaff, our Director of Music Ministry, is available to discuss music for weddings. Call her at 269-978-2333 to set up an appointment.
Couples are asked to participate in a pre-marital retreat. The Joy-Filled Marriage Weekend is offered through the Diocese of Kalamazoo. To obtain a current schedule, contact Socorro Truchan at 269-903-0199 or go to diokzoo.org/marriage-preparation.org
Introduction
Marriage Preparation
Paperwork
All couples must meet with the priest or his representative to determine their freedom
to marry before a wedding date can be reserved.
A Pre-Nuptial Investigation must be completed. It is a questionnaire concerning
freedom to marry and the understanding of marriage.
Baptismal certificates issued in the last 6 months, with notations, from the church of baptism are required. In mixed-faith marriages the Catholic will sign a form stating
their intention to maintain his/her faith and to share that faith with his/her children. The form requests the Bishop’s permission for a mixed faith marriage.
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Marriage Preparation
(Continued)
Marriage Preparation Courses
There are tools that help add richness to your relationship and marriage
preparation. Couples preparing for marriage at St. Catherine complete the
following steps:
FOCCUS is an online survey completed by each person through a personal email provided by bride and groom. The couple registers online and the first person to
sign on the FOCCUS (www.foccusinc.com ) will pay the $20.00 registration fee.
When the completed results are ready, the couple will be called to schedule their appointments with the priest or his representative for discussion. The couple
should plan on at least 5 meetings for preparation with the priest.
Discuss with the priest performing your marriage prep about which options are
available that best fit you as a couple.
Weekend Seminar - Our couples are asked
to participate in a Joy-Filled Marriage
weekend seminar. JFM weekends in 2020
January 25-26 March 28-29
May 30-31 September 19-20
November 21-22
Couples register at a cost of $130.00 for online classes or a weekend through the
Diocese of Kalamazoo. Contact Socorro Truchan (269-903-0199 or [email protected]) or visit https://www.diokzoo.org/marriage-preparation for
more details.
Couples need to attend the Natural Family Planning one-day introduction class
through the Diocese of Kalamazoo. An online class option is also available. Contact
Socorro Truchan (269-903-0199 or [email protected]) for more details.
Or log on to www.diokzoo.org and search under Diocesan Marriage Prep Process.
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Marriage Preparation
Facilities
St Catherine of Siena parish offers the use of church facilities for weddings to Catholic
couples if they meet the following qualifications:
Bride and/or groom is a registered adult member of St. Catherine’s for at least 6 months
prior to reserving the wedding date
OR
Bride’s and/or groom’s parents or grandparents are active members of St. Catherine’s
Parish.
Ministers for the Celebration
Ordinarily, a parish priest or deacon presides at the wedding. With the permission of
the pastor, the couple may invite a guest priest or deacon to preside. For priests from
outside the Kalamazoo Diocese, permission must be obtained from the bishop and the
pastor. We will help you arrange this. This arrangement should be made as early as
possible to allow for appropriate civil and ecclesial delegation. Visiting priests are to
observe church law and follow parish policies regarding weddings. In the case of
interfaith marriages, there are a number of options for involving clergy from both
faiths.
Readers and Extraordinary Ministers of Holy Communion may be selected by the
couple in accordance with Church guidelines. You may use altar servers at weddings
celebrated within the Mass.
(Continued)
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Planning the Wedding
Indoor/outdoor ceremony
In the Diocese of Kalamazoo, marriages must take place in a parish church.
Weddings are not permitted in homes, gardens, parks, etc.
Church Hours and Wedding Dates
The policy of the Diocese of Kalamazoo is that Saturday weddings may begin no later
than 2 pm. Weddings are not scheduled on Sundays. Weddings also may be
celebrated on a Friday evening or another weekday or evening. There are some times
in the church year when the liturgical calendar discourages or prohibits the
celebration of weddings. For example, the season of Lent is a penitential season and
that spirit affects all parish liturgies between Ash Wednesday and Easter.
Wedding Assistant
St. Catherine’s requires the use of one of our assistants for all weddings. They will be
present and direct the rehearsal, and provide assistance before, during, and after the
ceremony. They will assist you by helping in any way so the ceremony runs
smoothly. This includes answering questions, organizing the order of the procession,
handling emergencies, and anything else that arises.
Wedding Rehearsal
If your family and wedding party would like to have the priest available for
confessions at the rehearsal please notify the wedding assistant.
Normally, the evening before the wedding there is a rehearsal for all members of the
wedding party as well as readers and servers (if they are selected by the couple.) The
rehearsal is directed by the wedding assistant. All members should arrive ten
minutes before the rehearsal is scheduled to begin. Rehearsals begin on time and are
limited to one hour in length.
Reminder: no alcoholic beverages or smoking are allowed in the church and behavior
appropriate for church is expected of everyone present.
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Stipends and fees
St. Catherine of Siena Church offers the use of church facilities for weddings to
Catholic couples if they meet qualifications (see page 5).
If the couple has no immediate family connection (parent/grandparents) or if neither
the bride or groom have been members of St. Catherine’s six months prior to reserving the wedding date then there fee is $1,500.00 which is paid when securing the church
for the wedding date. Along with a $300.00 preparation fee.
Planning the Wedding
All couples are responsible for the payment of the following fees:
Wedding Assistant $150.00
Sacristan/Assistant Helper $75.00
Server (celebration within Mass) $25.00
Materials, postage & miscellaneous expenses $50.00
Stipends are to be paid by check or money order made payable to each recipient
(labeled envelopes are provided in your Wedding Planning folder) and are due in the
parish office 14 days prior to wedding rehearsal.
One check made out to St. Catherine for the Presider and Musician
Presider (current average honorarium) $150.00
Musician Fees $300.00
Instrumentalist/Soloist (optional) Additional fees (Varies)
Marriage License
Bring all copies of the license and the return envelope due to the parish office by the
Monday prior to wedding rehearsal.
(Continued)
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The Church Environment
Environment
Your wedding assistant will help you to create a beautiful environment for your
celebration. Your assistant has the expertise to be mindful of the sanctity of the
sacrament of marriage and the church surroundings.
The environment within the church changes periodically, depending upon the
church season. This décor remains during weddings, although some adaptations
may be permitted. The narthex displays/tables may not be moved without
permission.
Runners are NOT allowed (people slip and fall). The wedding assistant will obtain
approval for additional decorations from the Director of Music Ministry or the
Director of Liturgy.
You may decorate before the rehearsal or on the wedding day (depending on other
events scheduled in the church). The parish has some items available for use,
such as aisle candles, a unity candle stand and holders. Please contact your
wedding assistant for more information.
Facilities
The Church may be used from 11:00 am to 4:00 pm for a Saturday wedding. If it
is a Friday wedding typically the wedding starts at 6:00 pm the church can be
used till 8:00 pm. Plans for taking pictures should be made accordingly.
Preparation rooms are available for dressing and must be cleaned and vacated
immediately after the wedding. A member of the wedding party will be assigned by
the wedding assistant to clean up. No alcohol or smoking is allowed in the
building. Sanctuary furnishings are not to be moved. All rented items, such as
candelabras, must be removed immediately after the wedding.
Musical instruments are for the use of the wedding musicians only. For safety
and for environmental reasons no rice, birdseed, confetti or any other items may
be used inside the building. Outside, only dried flower petals may be thrown and
bubbles may be used. No balloons may be released outside.
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Scripture & Music Selection
Liturgy and Music
As a couple, you are invited to select scripture readings and music that express
your love and commitment.
Catholic liturgy is expressed in signs, symbols, gestures, words, and music. It is
sacred and communal. In weddings, the prayerful rejoicing in the couple’s loving
exchange of vows is a symbol of God’s relationship with his people.
Prayers and music are chosen in consultation with the Pastoral Associate of Music
Ministry. To assist your planning, you will be provided with a worksheet. An
appointment should be made with the associate three months prior to the wedding,
preferably after meeting with the clergyman. The readings are chosen in
consultation with the presider. You may also include special liturgical elements
such as family/ethnic traditions after discussing them with the presider.
Liturgical music serves two functions. At times it accompanies a ritual action such
as a procession. At other times the music is the ritual action, calling for
participation by all present, such as the singing of the Psalm. It must follow general
church and diocesan guidelines for music in liturgy. The Associate will also prepare
the program for the ceremony. Sample programs are available by request. You can
reach Tricia Tetzlaff at 978-2333 or email her at [email protected]
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Professional Services
Florist
Please check with the wedding assistant regarding the time and place of your flower
delivery because other scheduled activities may require special arrangements.
Decorating may take place the hour before the wedding. Flowers may be placed
around the altar, but never on it, nor should they hide the altar, or hinder movement
around it. Flower arrangements should not harm church furniture (e.g., no wire,
sticky tape). Nor should they ever be placed on the piano.
Photographers and Videographers
Because your wedding ceremony is primarily a spiritual experience, we know you
want only the very best recording of the event. Therefore, we strongly encourage you
to hire a photographer and/or videographer who has an understanding of the
meaning and tradition of the Catholic Church. This will enhance the liturgy for you
as well as those whom you have invited to participate.
Please communicate the following information to your photographer and videographer:
We do not allow videographers to “plug into” our system for their audio. No one, other than St. Catherine staff, is allowed to touch the sound board. No exceptions . The sound board contains sophisticated equipment which could easily be upset in the
hands of strangers.
Posed pictures may be taken before or after but not during the wedding. The official
photographer may take pictures during the wedding as long as he/she remains on the
periphery and does not interfere in any way. No flash photography is allowed during
the liturgy. Videotaping is permitted provided the camera (s) remains unobtrusive. At
no time may the photographer or videographer enter the sanctuary (approach the
altar) or be situated in front of the congregation. No one may move any furniture in
the Church without specific permission from the priest or the wedding assistant.
All photographers and videographers must check in with the wedding assistant upon
arrival for your wedding. All equipment must be removed by 4:00 pm for a Saturday
wedding. For a Friday wedding equipment must be removed by 8:00 pm. The priest or
wedding assistant may bar any photographer from participating at St. Catherine’s if
these policies are not followed. Please present this information to your photographer
before the wedding so there will be no misunderstandings.
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Other Considerations
Unity Candle
Some couples choose to use the symbol of lighting a unity candle during their
wedding ceremony. The couple by exchange of their vows, and the blessing and
exchange of their rings, stand as a symbol of unity between Christ and His
Church. However, it is not part of the liturgical tradition and a more appropriate
use of the unity candle may be at the wedding reception.
Flowers to Mary
If a couple wishes to observe the pious custom of seeking the intercession of Our
Lady, it normally occurs at the end of the ceremony but before the final blessing.
The couple may place flowers by the sculpture of the Holy Family and spend a
few moments in prayer. Discuss this with your wedding assistant.
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Couple Timeline for Marriage Preparation Please keep your information updated as you complete the items below.)
Name_____________________________________ Name_______________________________________ Groom Bride
Witness Names
Male______________________________________ Female_____________________________________
_____ Baptismal Certificates (with notations) requested within the last six months. Send to: St. Catherine of Siena Church • 1150 West Centre Avenue, Portage, MI 49024 ATTN: Marianne Verner, Office Supervisor
_____ Witness Affidavits (as needed) signed and witnessed Groom ____ Bride _____
_____ FOCCUS registration paper and return to clergyman or Marianne Verner, Office
Supervisor [email protected]. _____ FOCCUS survey online. Then make an appointment with presiding clergyman or lay
facilitator couple.
_____ Desert Streams counseling -- if recommended by the priest or deacon.
_____ Natural Family Planning Seminar (required) — schedule through the Diocese of
Kalamazoo www.diokzoo.org or contact Socorro Truchan 269-903-0199 or [email protected] for more details.
_____ Marriage Preparation Class “Joy Filled Marriage” weekend seminar (required) schedule through the Diocese of Kalamazoo www.diokzoo.org Contact Socorro Truchan 269-903-0199 or [email protected] for more details.
_____ Ceremony planned with priest or deacon. Selection of prayers, Scripture readings
and other planning is completed at least one month prior to the wedding date. _____ Meeting with Tricia Tetzlaff, Pastoral Associate for Music Ministry, to discuss music
after wedding is set. Email her at [email protected].
_____ Meeting with the wedding assistant three months prior to wedding date.
_____ Names, address, and phone number of any other ministers and institutions
involved with the wedding, and letters of permission obtained by the clergy. _____ Marriage license brought to parish office 14 days prior to marriage (please include
witness names in legible writing).
_____ Wedding stipends paid by money order or check to each individual recipient and are due to parish office 14 days prior to marriage.
Updated March 2020