Please Pass the Etiquette: Please Pass the Etiquette: Interacting with EmployersInteracting with Employers

"A good beginning

makes a good ending."

-English Proverb

Today’s AgendaToday’s Agenda

• Mind Your Manners; Defining Business Etiquette

• Professional Presentation; Reality vs. Perception

• Talk the Talk; Communicating with Employers

• Elbows Off the Table; Dining Etiquette

Good manners will open doors that the best education cannot. Clarence Thomas (1948 - )

What is Etiquette? What is Etiquette?

Definition• Manners that are acceptable by a society or

business (Webster’s New world Dictionary)• A set of traditions, based on kindness,

efficiency, and logic that have evolved over time.

What Constitutes Business What Constitutes Business Etiquette?Etiquette?

• The gender-neutral application of powerful social skills to transact accepted business practices with thoughtful consideration that sharpens and increases your competitive edge.

-The Executive Protocol Group

• Without etiquette, you limit your potential, risk your image, jeopardize relationships that are fundamental to business success.

Perception and Self Perception and Self PromotionPromotion

– Johari Window

Common Knowledge

PotentialFacade

Blind Spots

Communicating With Communicating With EmployersEmployers

– Follow-up– Email– Phone/Voice Mail– Cell Phones– Face to Face

You can get through life with bad manners, but it's easier with good manners.

Lillian Gish

Following-UpFollowing-Up

• RSVP and follow through

• 6 Degrees of Separation

• Prioritization

• Acknowledge, even if you aren’t interested

E-Mail EtiquetteE-Mail Etiquette

• Don't Be A Novelist

• Too Much Punctuation!!!

• Formatting Is Not Everything

• Salutations

• Signatures

• Grammar and Punctuation

Phone/Voice MailPhone/Voice Mail

• Speak slowly and clearly• Answer with your name• Don’t use speakerphone without permission• Return all calls the same day • Record a professional voicemail message • When leaving voicemail, speak slowly and

repeat contact information

Cell PhonesCell Phones

• Use cell phones in private

• Limit your distractions

• Turn off when in meetings or interviews

• Check out your connection prior to accepting or returning a call

Dining EtiquetteDining Etiquette

"The world was my oyster, but I used the wrong fork."

-Oscar Wilde

Why Meet Over a Meal?Why Meet Over a Meal?

– Social Fit/Etiquette– Assess Team Orientation– Project How Well You Might Work With

Clients– Relaxed Environment To Sell The

Company– Get To Know You On A Personal Level

Openers: Pre-Meal MingleOpeners: Pre-Meal Mingle

– Casual conversation– Mingle and introduce yourself– Chance to connect with many before a

meal– Note:

• Nametags should be worn on the Right hand side

"The mark of a good conversationalist? Pay attention to what people say!"

Larry King

You May Be Seated...You May Be Seated...

– Women should be seated first – Place your Napkin in your lap

• The napkin may be placed on your chair if you must leave the table

• Do not spit food out into your napkin• Be careful not to leave lipstick on the linen• Use the napkin to blot, not wipe

– Remember • Solids on the Left• Liquids on the Right

The Place SettingThe Place Setting

1st Course: Soup and 1st Course: Soup and SaladSalad

• Use utensils from outside to inside

• Wait until all are served before eating

• Bread– Pass to the right– Break and butter small pieces

• Salad– Pass dressing to the right– Cut leaves with a knife if they are large

• Soup– Stir to cool and scoop away from yourself

BeveragesBeverages

• Follow your host

• Alcohol issues– Over 21?

• No more than 1 even if host has more

– Under 21?• Not at all

Seafood StartersSeafood Starters

• Shrimp– With a tail, you may use your fingers– Without a tail, you should use a fork (2 tined)

• Oysters– Raw in the shell, swallow whole– Cooked, use a fork

• Tip - Do not try seafood for the first time at an employer event

Main CourseMain Course

• Don’t order the most expensive menu item• Cut your food into pieces 1-2 at a time• Cut with your Dominant hand then put your knife

down• Set down utensils between bites• Salt and Pepper are married• Place utensils at 4:20 if you are finished• Place at an X if you must leave the table

Dessert: To eat or not to Dessert: To eat or not to eat?eat?

• Follow the cue of your host• Use the utensils at the top of your plate or the

fork immediately to the left of your plate• Place your coffee cup up for coffee

– Never leave your spoon in the cup

• Sugar and cream are married• Napkin remains in your lap until you are ready

to leave then fold and place next to your plate

Sticky SituationsSticky Situations

• Spilling Food– On You– On the table

• Unwanted Food/Too Hot• Soiled Silverware• Dropped Silverware• Sneezing at the Table• Food Caught in Teeth

Pop QuizPop Quiz

• If you bring a folder or portfolio with you to a business meal, it is best to clear a small space for it on the table– True or False

• It is appropriate to place your napkin on your lap as soon as you are seated– True or false

Pop QuizPop Quiz

• Since you are the employer’s guest, it is appropriate for you to order first– True or False

• If you get warm during the meal, in order to stay comfortable, it is best to remove your jacket– True or False

Pop QuizPop Quiz

• The number of forks at your place setting is an indication of the number of courses you may expect to be served– True or False

• To indicate that you are done with your meal, simply make eye contact with the wait staff to have your plate removed– True or False

Pop QuizPop Quiz

• To get an idea of the price range in which to order, you should ask your host for a few suggestions from the menu– True or False

• If you are at a business lunch and you are not yet full, it is expected that you will order dessert– True or False

Pop QuizPop Quiz

• When ordering alcohol at a business meal, it is best to follow the host’s lead in deciding how to approach the situation. Continue to order as many beverages as the host.– True or False

• If you need to excuse yourself during the meal, it is appropriate to place your napkin on your seat until you return– True or False

Pop QuizPop Quiz

• If you are at a meal with a group, you should use the plates near your upper right, if you are right handed– True or False

• If you are with a group and sharing items (bread, appetizers), typically you should pass to the person on your right– True or False

Pop QuizPop Quiz

• Since Cell phones are so common in business today, if you have a cell phone, it is appropriate to leave it on during an interview lunch– True or False

• When given a nametag to wear during a business function, you should wear it under your right shoulder– True or False

Pop QuizPop Quiz

• When interviewing during a meal, you should take responsibility for initiating conversation about your qualifications. It is appropriate for you to direct the conversation and to “Sell Yourself”– True or False

• When greeting those who have joined you for an interview, you should rise and shake their hands– True or False

Final TipsFinal Tips

• Take your cue from the Host

• Prepare questions and read the paper

• Connect with everyone and be inclusive

• Remain calm no matter what

• brush up on table manners

• Practice practice practice

“A man's manners are a mirror in which he shows his portrait.”

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Questions?Questions?

• amyhoag@umich.edu

• The Career Center - 3200 SAB– www.careercenter.umich.edu