PORTICOMusic

Humour

Popular Culture & Reference

Highlights

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Mind the BollocksJohnny Sharp

9781907554469 | £7.99 | August | PB

192 pages | 198 x 129 mm

• Notorious NME scribe Johnny Cigarettes (neé Sharp) follows up his

hilarious 2009 bestseller, Crap Lyrics• A riotous rant through the utter ridiculousness of Rock and Roll

• Contains raucous commentary on bad album reviews, dodgy advice in

songs, rock star lies, the nonsense of hype and hyperbole, pretentious

quotes and music’s most enduring, and hilarious, urban myths

Popular music has always attracted the kind of morally bankrupt individualswho are too unhinged to hold down a proper job. And that’s just as well. Afterall, if your local fishmonger told you he’d just snorted his father’s ashes, youmight think twice about doing business with him. But when Keith Richardssays it, you think ‘Nice one, Keef!’ and have a flick through your iPod to find‘Honky Tonk Women’.

Mind The Bollocks collects some of the finest stools of wisdom ever to fallfrom the foul, ill-educated mouths of rock stars. It digs beneath the culture ofnonsense surrounding popular music and answers pertinent question suchas: Are the X-Factor auditions all they appear to be? Is there really a musical frequency that can make you soil yourself? And which world-renowned rockguitarist sliced his own penis off?

Johnny Sharp knows all about embracing the ridiculous having written for

NME for many glorious years as Johnny Cigarettes.

Also available

The History of the NME9781907554483 | £14.99 | HB

9781907554773 | eBook

The Story of Northern Soul9781907554230 | £9.99 | PB

9781907554728 | eBook

Crap Lyrics9781906032593 | £7.99 | PB

9781907554780 | eBook

The Ballad of Britain9781906032548 | £12.99 | PB

9781907554766 | eBook

Explore More

Music Titles

From Portico in

Print & eBook

Format

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Shit London: Number 2Patrick Dalton

9781907554735 | £8.99 | October | HB

115 colour photographs | 112 pages | 148 x 194 mm

• After a whole year of a London love-in brought on by the 2012 Olympics

and the Queen’s Jubilee, Shit London: Number 2 delivers another

hilarious dose of what Londoners have to actually put up with every

single day

• The follow-up to 2011’s bestselling, and utterly hilarious, 

Shit London• Visit www.shitlondon.co.uk for more hilarity or join Shit London’s

10,000 members on Facebook

‘Nobody is healthy in London. Nobody can be.’ Jane Austen

Once all the hype, hyperbole and hysteria of the 2012 Olympics has beendiscarded in the nostalgia bin, Londoners will be left with all the actualtidying up. But once all that tidying up has been done, Londoners will thenbe left with the crushing memory that their streets, shops, architecture,culture and heritage was in a brutal state of dereliction. The truth is, nomatter what Lord Coe, his PR team and the rest of the world think, the factremains: London is still shit. 

This hilarious follow-up to the bestselling Shit London continues to explorethe mad, mad world of ill-conceived community and street ‘art’, pun-basedshop names, creepy graffiti, God-awful translations, comical signs, bleaklandscapes and many other unintentionally funny or disturbing scenes thatreal Londoners have to put up with every single day.

Patrick Dalton was born in London and has lived in London his entire life (not

including holidays). Professionally, he is a radio producer who worked for

many years at the BBC and later at the London radio station LBC producing

a variety of news and entertainment programmes. Unprofessionally, he likes

taking photographs. Patrick now works as a freelance radio producer by day

and the creator/visionary of www.shitlondon.co.uk by night. As of 2012,

Patrick is a regular contributor to Time Out London magazine.

Also available

Shit London9781907554346 | £8.99 | HB

Rude London9781907554452 | £8.99 | HB

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365 Reasons to beCheerful

9781906032968 | £7.99 | HB

Also available

The Best of Mac 2012Stan McMurtry

9781907554612 | £9.99 | October | HB

Over 125 black & white cartoons | 128 pages | 180 x 245 mm

• From the Daily Mail’s perennially popular resident

cartoonist, MAC

• A hilarious collection of MAC’s best cartoons from 2012

• Following on from the bestselling The Best of MAC2011, also available from Portico

MAC’s annuals have been delighting Daily Mail readers,and his loyal MAC fans, for the past decade, tickling theirfunny parts with his famous cultural sideswipes andhilarious stabs at the coalition government, internationalevents celebrity shenanigans and the world in general.

In 2012, even though the world has changed considerably,with lots of events to celebrate and ridicule, MAC contin-ues unabated in his quest for satirical gold stars, pokinggentle fun at all the year’s hilarious headlines, charactersand wicked news stories. What will be in this year's book?You'll have to buy it to find out!

Stan McMurtry (MAC) has been a social and political

cartoonist for the Daily Mail since 1970. He has recently

been honoured with an MBE.

Mac’s Tee Time9781907554186 | £7.99 | HB

365 Reasons to beProud to be British9781907554391 | £7.99 | HB

365 Silver LiningsRichard Happer

9781907554681 | £7.99 | September | HB

25 black & white illustrations | 224 pages | 160 x 125 mm

• The follow up to the truimphant 365 Reasons to beCheerful and 365 Reasons to be Proud to be British,

• A trip through history’s mistakes turned good –

because every cloud has a silver lining!

• Contains a happy ending for every day of the year –

a perfect present for as well as eternal optimists!

365 Silver Linings is a book so full of stupid mistakes thatyou’d think the world would have given up and stoppedturning. But, as the saying goes, for every cloud there is asilver lining, and 365 Silver Linings has one for every dayof the year on the day it happened.

This brilliantly quirky and entertaining book demonstratesthat while the old adage of ‘everyone makes mistakes’ maybe true, some mistakes are so life-changing that they willbe remembered until the end of time – and can even endup making life much, much better for everyone else!

Richard Happer is the bestselling author of 2010’s 

365 Reasons to be Cheerful (9781906032968) and 2011’s

365 Reasons to be Proud to be British (9781907554391), also

available from Portico.

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Bumper 1980s Activity BookMel Elliot

9781907554797 | £12.99 | September | HB

120 colour illustrations | 144 pages | 276 x 210 mm

• 52 brilliantly unique and inventive hobby projects to make,

do and create at home

• The perfect gift for the 21st Century grown up who loves looking

back to the future

• Visit www.ilovemel.me for Mel’s amazing brand of unique products

The Bumper 1980s Activity Book is a brilliantly entertaining, retro activity bookfor all those 80s-obsessed people in the world. The book is the perfect gift forthe creative artist, crafter and hobbyist in the family, centred around the mostpopular decade of all time ... EVER!

Packed with 52 fun, practical, step-by-step guides to creating and makingyour own favourite art projects at home, Bumper 1980s Activity Book has oneproject for every week of the year. Fun projects include making your ownpaper dolls of iconic 1980s celebrities, colouring in defining 1980s recordcovers, designing and printing on your own mugs, t-shirts and badges, replicating retro 1980s typography ... as well as many other zany, quirky andunique projects to make and do from a decade that time simply won't let us forget!

Bumper 1980s Activity Book is the perfect purchase for the 21st century grownup who loves looking back to the future!

Mel Elliott and her husband Andy run

www.ilovemel.me – a unique and successful

brand that designs and sells its own range

of products. Recently, Mel's products have

been showcased in the Guardian, French

Vogue, and various high street shops such

as Topshop.

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Ukulele Crazy!Mike Evans

9781907554537 | £9.99 | October | HB

Over 50 photographs | 112 pages | 200 x 200 mm

• Brand new series of ‘CRAZY’ titles from Portico,

to accompany Harmonica Crazy!• A quirky, fun and practical guide to learning all that

you need to know about the ukulele

• Contains songs to play, chords to learn, tips,

techniques, as well as famous players and brands

To capitalise on an epic surge of modern interest in theinstrument, comes Ukulele Crazy!, a quirky celebrationand practical guide to all that you need to know about the ukulele. Over the past year the instrument has seen a 21st century renaissance in popularity – no longer is it most commonly associated with George Formby and a bygone novelty era. With chords illustrated for simplicity, expert techniques, songs to learn, as well as a history of famous players and brands, Ukulele Crazy is the perfectpresent for beginners and advanced players alike.

Mike Evans began writing about popular music in the

Seventies as a broadcaster in local radio and as a freelance

writer, his work regularly appearing in Sounds, Elle and as

a contributor to Melody Maker.

Everything You Needto Know About

Everything 9781906032999 | £14.99 | HB

Also available

Cool ScienceDaniel Tatarsky

9781907554698 | £8.99 | October | HB

Over 50 colour illustrations | 128 pages | 148 x 194 mm

• A brilliant, quirky and enlightening book to turn

science enthusiasts into scientists

• 50 amazingly simple but effective science-based

tricks to wow your friends, family & children

• The best present a man could ever receive!

As we all know, the geeks have inherited the earth and,it’s official, science is now cool! With Cool Science you canlearn 50 amazing, simple and science-related tricks toimpress friends your down the pub or for teaching yourchildren too! This action-stuffed book is for action-manmen who love to experiment with geeky tricks basedaround peculiar physics, mind-boggling biology andcrazy chemistry ... and with more fascinating factoidsthan you can shake a Bunsen burner at.

Daniel Tatarsky's first book was Flick to Kick: An Illustrated

History of Subbuteo. He is the author of the smash hit

Everything You Need to Know About Everything You Need to

Know About (9781906032999), also available from Portico.

Everything You NeedTo Know About:

Inventions9781907554421 | £14.99 |FB

Everything You NeedTo Know About:

The Universe9781907554414 | £14.99 |FB

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How to Make Money TradingLex Van Dam

9781908449146 | £9.99 | July | PB

Over 50 charts and graphs | 192 pages | 215 x 138 mm

• Straight talking advice from the presenter and creator of BBC2’s 

Million Dollar Traders• Offers clear-cut tips for beginners from experienced stock

market traders

• Successful follow-on to How to Make Money from Property

People are more interested than ever before in understanding the innerworkings of the City. In 2008, BBC2 presented Million Dollar Traders, whichhas been described as a high-finance version of The Apprentice. Filmed as thecredit crises escalated, experienced hedge fund manager Lex Van Dam gaveeight novices £500,000 of his own money to trade on the stock exchange.

Lex now turns his expertise to How to Make Money Trading which covers all theessential information you need to understand the stock market and trading.From managing a portfolio and doing your homework to controlling youremotions, this book gives you straight talking, expert advice on everythingyou need to know to create your own ‘City-sized’ bonus.

Lex Van Dam is a successful hedge

fund manager and the creator of the

BBC's successful financial reality series

Million Dollar Traders.

Also available

How to Make Money from Property

9781843405177 | £10.99 | PB

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TS Can’t Be Arsed9781906032371 | £9.99 | HB

Don’t Even Think About It!

9781906032746 | £9.99 | HB

How Not To TalkLike An Arse

9781907554209 | £9.99 | HB

The GrumpyGardener’sHandbook

9781907554247 | £9.99 | HB

The Grumpy Driver’s Handbook 9781906032791 | £9.99 | HB

One Grump or Two 9781906032531 | £9.99 | HB

When I Were a Lad...9781907554001 | £9.99 | HB

Campbell’s WeatherCompendium

9781906032982 | £9.99 | HB

Those Were theDays: Football

9781907554445 | £9.99 | HB

Those Were theDays: Golf

9781907554438 | £9.99 | HB

When I Were AMeerkat

9781907554544 | £9.99 | HB

Kent’s StrangestTales

9781907554339 | £9.99 | PB

The Joy of Sheds9781907554513 | £9.99 | HB

When I Were A Lass9781907554582 | £9.99 | HB

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The Olympics’Strangest Moments9781907554476 | £9.99 |PB

Hidden Mathematicsof Sport

9781907554223 | £9.99 | HB

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The Coast Road9781905798094 | £9.99 | PB

The Water Road9781861056559 | £9.99 | PB

My Name Is Moose9781843406266 | £9.99 | HB

Now Open Sundays! 9781906032838 | £7.99 | HB

Wrotten English 9781907554100 | £9.99 | HB

Ode to Love 9781907554384 | £9.99 | HB

Humphrey Lyttleton It Just Occurred to Me

9781905798179 | £7.99 | PB

The Football Hall of Fame

9781906032463 | £17.99 | HB

Feet of theChameleon

9781906032852 | £7.99 | PB

The Backpacker’sBible New Edition

9781907554216 | £9.99 | PB

England My England9781907554490 | £9.99 | HB

The Boy in the Song9781907554520 | £9.99 |HB

Lost in Translation9781907554551 | £9.99 |HB

When In Rome9781907554575 | £7.99 |HB

The VeryEmbarrassing Book

of Dad Jokes9781907554537 | £9.99 | HB

The Girl in the Song9781907554032 | £9.99 | HB

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