“hereditaryslothinstructsme.”

—williamshakespeare

tableofcontents

introduction

fitness

food

work

money

home

lifestyle

furbaby

gratitude

introduction

Life’seasywhenyou’reasloth…unlessyou’vegotresponsibilities,goals,andhighcholesterol.Inthatcase,livingtheslothlifeisabitmorechallenging.

“Ishouldgotothegym,butI’drathertakeanap.”“Ishouldfinishmywork,butIwannawatchNetflix.”“Ishouldeatkaleandeggwhites,butdoughnutsaredelicious.”

TheseareallthingsIsaytomyselfdaily.

In2014Istartedablogdocumentingmystruggleswithprocrastination,laziness,andtemptation.Seeingasmyexperienceswereuniversallysharedamongfriends,Iwantedtotelljokesthrougharelatablecartooncharacter—arepresentationofthelazyspiritanimalthatlivesinsideusall.Thus,Slothildawasborn—asweet,imperfect,sleepylittlesloth.

Slothildaturnedintoanonlinecomicseriesaboutarelatablemascotwhoencountersobstaclesasasloth.Beinginnatelylazyposesamusingchallengestoherpersonalgrowth.Sheconstantlystrugglestoovercomeprocrastination,herloveforjunkfood,andheraddictiontomodern-daytechnology.

Soundfamiliar?InthisbookSlothildaexploresaninnerconflictwecanallrelateto—thedesiretosucceedandgrow,whileparadoxicallydealingwiththeeverpresenttemptationtosloth.

Inrealitybeingaslothispartoflife—andsometimes,themostenjoyablepartoflife.Sonexttimeyou’retemptedtoindulgeinaboutofbingewatching,Internet-surfing,andcouchpotato-ing…don’tfeelbad.EmbraceyourinnerSlothilda!

fitness

thefitnesscycle

iusemytreadmilleveryday.

benefitsofyogaincreasedrangeofmotion

tighterglutes

strongercore

improvedflexibility

firstdayowningafoamroller:

secondday,andeverydayafter:

january1finallymadeittothegym.

january2bebackinsixmonths.

ihaveachievedrunner’shigh!

amixbetweennauseaandaccomplishment.

i’mworkingonmysix-pack.

onlyfivemorepackstogo.

exerciseball:alternativeuseschair

pillow

footrest

self-defense

must…get…fit!

rathergetcupcakes.

myfavoriteyogaposesdownwarddog

warrior

cobra

sloth

gimmeasec.

i’mtryingtocountmycalories.

workouttoeatout.

acalorieburned…

…isacalorieearned.

igotthis.

igotthis.

idon’tgotthis.

food

notsureifi’mhungryorjustbored.

eitherway,problemsolved!

themunchiesareamanifestationofmyanxiety.

idon’twannahydrate,

iwannacarbohydrate.

leavemealone.i’mtestingforlactoseintolerance.

healthynutscashewnuts

walnuts

pinenuts

peanuts

doughnu…

burningcalories

howtomakeasmoothie

1.leafygreens

2.abanana

3.chiaseeds?

4.peanutbutter.

lotsofpeanutbutter.mainlyjustpeanutbutter.

it’sfine…

…they’reorganic.

ikeeptemptationatadistance,

butmystep-stoolnearby.

hamburgerswillalwaysholdaspecialplaceinmyheart,

ascholesterol.

i’llsavehalfforlater…

…5minuteslater!

sorrythighs,

ilikefries!

self-control?

i’monlyfamiliarwithinstantregret.

justonebite…

ilovebroccoli.

itabsorbsthemostranch.

breakfast,

justanexcusetoeatdessertinthemorning.

cheatday

work

everything’sfine.

exceptit’smonday.

the4stagesofwriter’sblock1.concern

2.worry

3.despair

4.acceptance

mydailyroutine:

makecoffee

prepmeals

exercise

walkdog

cleanhouse

work

the“ideserve”trap

workhard,

playhard.

i’mgonnastopprocrastinating…

…rightafterthisnap.

ergonomicworkstationsgood

better

best

help!i’mdrowninginwork!

productivefromthefront.

retailtherapyfromtheback.

idon’thavetimeforwork.

i’mtoobusyprocrasti-cleaning.

ihavealove/haterelationshipwiththeinternet.

thoughmostofthetimeichooselove!

thedreadedd-words

deadlines!

diets!!

dishes!!!

workstartsin5minutes,

whichmeansi’vestillgot4.

money

ineverpayfullprice…

…cuzican’taffordto.

whatcleaningoutthefridgelookslike:

whatitfeelslike:

i’mallaboutdiyprojects…

…cuziliketosavemoney.

ahh!justspentthewholedayshopping.

nowontosomemuchneededr&r.

regret&return.

iamdetermined,andiwillfindyou…

…validonlinecouponcode.

ishouldbuysomefruit.

i’lleatiteventually.

awalletfilledwithcreditcardsisn’tirresponsible.

it’sresourceful!

orderedagiftformyfriend,

andafewthingsformyself.

lastone?andit’sonsale!?

i’llgrowintoit.

home

myhouseistidy.

ididn’tsayitwasorganized.

can’tgetoutofbed,

to-dolistweighingmedown.

peoplecallitadisasterzone.

icallitmycomfortzone.

lookatallthebooksiown.

thesearemyfavorites.

ilivelifeontheedge…

…ofmycouch.

braceyourself;laundrydayiscoming.

just…one…load!

sshhhh.i’mtryingtoprocrasti-nap.

imademybed,

nowimustlieinit!

nailedit!

myroomisasafespace,

butplease,proceedwithcaution.

myrefrigerator:

aka“theotherjunkdrawer.”

whenlifegiveyoulemons

justeatthelemoncuzcookingishard.

savingplasticcontainers:

thefinelinebetweenenvironmentalismandhoarding.

imadeemfromscratch.

worthit.

lifestyle

seasonalvibessummer

fall

winter

spring

#vacation

mysuperpoweris…

…powernapping.

theselfiecycle

myauthenticselfisacouchpotato.

timeformybeautyrest.

(6hourslater)

okay,i’mallpacked…

…formyweekendtrip.

goingtothebeachisnice.

igettoworkonmytan.

searchingforinnerpeace.

maybei’llfinditwheniwakeup.

mykindaparty

howtotoleratelife1.getcoffee

2.drinkcoffee

3.enjoysuperpowers

pleaseexcuseme,

i’mintroverting.

i’mgonnadocardiotomorrow,

buttodayi’mdoingheavylifting.

myfavoritekindoflunchis…

…bymyself.

#life

myfavoritetimeis…

…me-time.

patienceisavirtue.

unlessi’mhungry,

thenpatiencecankissmy .

furbaby

mylife,interruptedexercising

eating

changing

cleaning

mydoglookssocutewhenhesleeps.

i’lltrynottowakehimup.

doggylanguageloveme.

loveme.

loveme.

goaway.

mydog,masterofdisguise.

ilovefireworks.

peanutdoesnot.

thegrassisgreenerontheotherside.

ijustneedhelpgettingthere.

icanexplaineverything.

ohwait…ican’ttalk.

let’sgohalvsies.

that’snotwhatihadinmind.

badhairday?

hereit’scalledeveryday.

peanut’saspecialdog.

heknowshowtothinkoutsidethebox.

mydog,thepickyeater.

iboughtyouagift,peanut!

alittlegratitudewouldbenice.

myotheralarmclock.

i’mhome!

didyoumissme?

iloveyou,peanut…

…eventhoughi’myour#2.

gratitude

Completingthisbookwasnoeasytask.Turnsoutwriting/illustratingabookabouttheslothlifeisn’texactlyconducivetoactuallylivingtheslothlife.Thankfully,Ihadaslewofpeopletopushmealongtheway.

Firstandforemost,thankyoutoMarkGottlieb,myagentatTridentMedia,whodiscoveredmyworkanddecidedthatcreatingabookwouldbeagoodidea.ThankyouMark,forhelpingmebringthisbooktofruition!

ToLeahZarra,myeditor,andtheteamatSkyhorsePublishing.Youguystookachanceonmeandhavebeennothingbutencouragingthroughoutthisprocess.Thankyouforbelievingenoughinmyworkandforprovidingmewiththeresourcestobecomeanactualpublishedauthor!

ToDr.NadineMacaluso,myJedimaster,forteachingmeaboutauthenticity,agency,andforhelpingmedevelopalevelofcouragewithinmyselfthatIwould’veneverdiscoveredonmyown.

ToMaryLang,mybookpublishingmentor.Thankyouforbeingmyguidinglightsincetheverybeginning,andforhelpingmenavigatethisprojectintherightdirection.

Tomyfriendsandfamilymembers.Specifically:Dad,Sass,Lindy,NickChelyapov,PaulYoshida,BenjaminKaltenecker,BradfordGibbons,theVilloriafamily,JessGilliam,andthefolksoveratGiphy.Thisbookwould’veneverbeenmadepossibleifitweren’tforyouguys.Youwereallpivotalininspiring,influencing,andpushingmealongtheway.

Tothemostimportantpersoninmylife,mywife,K.C.,whomIlovemorethananythingelseinthisworld(evenmorethanchurros).Thankyouforsupportingthiscrazydreamofminetomakecomicsaboutaquirkylittlesloth.Slothildawouldn’tbenearlyasfunnyandlovableifitweren’tforyou.I’msoluckytohaveyouinmylife.

Tomysocialmediafriendsande-mailsubscribers,Iloveyouguys!Iam

beyondgratefultohavesuchastrongfanbaseoffellowsloths.Thanksforkeepingmemotivatedalltheseyears,andforyournever-endingloveandsupport.IlookforwardtosharingnewSlothildacomicswithyouonline.

Lastly,aginormousthankstoyou,thereader.Ihopeyouenjoyedthisbook.Gotanyquestions,comments,orsuggestions?Feelfreetodropmealinebywritinginfromslothilda.com,orfeelfreetosayhionTwitterorInstagram(@slothilda).

—DanteFabiero

abouttheauthor

DanteFabieroisaLosAngelesnativewhohasmadeacareerworkingonsomeofTV’smostpopularanimatedshows,seenonNetflix,TBS,andFox.FabierolaunchedSlothildain2014andhasgarneredclosetohalfabillionviewsonthewebsiteGiphy.YoucanseeSlothildacometolifeandsubscribetoreceivefuturecomicsforfreeatslothilda.com.

@slothilda @slothilda slothilda.slothWWW.SLOTHILDA.COM

copyright©2018bydantefabieroallrightsreserved.nopartofthisbookmaybereproducedinanymannerwithouttheexpresswrittenconsentofthepublisher,exceptinthecaseofbriefexcerptsincriticalreviewsorarticles.allinquiriesshouldbeaddressedtoskyhorsepublishing,307west36thstreet,11thfloor,newyork,ny10018.

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coverdesignbyjennyzemanekcoverillustrationbydantefabieroprintisbn:978-1-5107-3657-3

ebookisbn:978-1-5107-3660-3

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