the big book's way to be rid of resentment (pages 63 67)oabigbook.info/bb step four...
TRANSCRIPT
The "BIG BOOK'S" Way to Be Rid of Resentment (pages 6367) INSTRUCTIONS: Affects my: (3)
DON’T FORGET THIS! Core Character Defects (4)
Study from the bottom of page 63 to the end of page 65 and then follow its instructions: a) List all people, institutions and principles (Column 1) from top to bottom. b) List all "causes" (Column 2), top to bottom. c) Do all six instincts in Column 3 from top to bottom for each “cause”. d) Consider the first three columns carefully. e) Then, complete Column 4 from top to bottom. I’m resentful at: (1) The causes: (2)
Self-E
ste
em
Security
(P
kt. B
oo
ks)
Am
bitio
ns
Pers
onal R
ela
tions
Sex R
ela
tions
Is a
ny fear
involv
ed?
"Putting out of our minds the wrongs others have done, [use fold lines to cover Columns 2 and 3] we resolutely looked for our own mistakes. Where had we been selfish, dishonest, self-seeking and frightened? . . . [D]isregard the other person involved entirely. Where were we to blame? . . . When we saw our faults we listed them. We placed them before us in black and white. We admitted our wrongs honestly and were willing to set these matters straight." (page 67)
Stu
dy f
rom
the b
otto
m o
f page 6
5 t
o e
nd o
f th
e 3
rd p
ara
gra
ph o
n p
age 6
7,
an
d t
hen
follo
w t
he i
nstr
uctio
ns.
Go t
o
each p
ers
on w
ho has h
arm
ed yo
u or
som
eone
an
d say "_
___
___
is
sp
iritu
ally
sic
k."
D
on't
forg
et
to say th
e
Resentm
ent
Pra
yer
(Lin
es 3-5
, pag
e 6
7),
"G
od,
ple
ase he
lp m
e show
___
__
___ th
e sa
me
to
lera
nce
, pity a
nd
patience I
wou
ld c
heerf
ully
gra
nt
a s
ick f
riend"
for
each a
nd e
very
pers
on w
ho h
as h
arm
ed y
ou
, th
em
selv
es o
r som
eon
e e
lse in C
olu
mn 1
prior
to s
tart
ing C
olu
mn 4
.
The "BIG BOOK'S" Way to Be Rid of Resentment (pages 6367) INSTRUCTIONS: Affects my: (3)
DON’T FORGET THIS! Core Character Defects (4)
Study from the bottom of page 63 to the end of page 65 and then follow its instructions: a) List all people, institutions and principles (Column 1) from top to bottom. b) List all "causes" (Column 2), top to bottom. c) Do all six instincts in Column 3 from top to bottom for each “cause”. d) Consider the first three columns carefully. e) Then, complete Column 4 from top to bottom. I’m resentful at: (1) The causes: (2)
Self-E
ste
em
Security
(P
kt. B
oo
ks)
Am
bitio
ns
Pers
onal R
ela
tions
Sex R
ela
tions
Is a
ny fear
involv
ed?
"Putting out of our minds the wrongs others have done, [use fold lines to cover Columns 2 and 3] we resolutely looked for our own mistakes. Where had we been selfish, dishonest, self-seeking and frightened? . . . [D]isregard the other person involved entirely. Where were we to blame? . . . When we saw our faults we listed them. We placed them before us in black and white. We admitted our wrongs honestly and were willing to set these matters straight." (page 67)
Stu
dy f
rom
the b
otto
m o
f page 6
5 t
o e
nd o
f th
e 3
rd p
ara
gra
ph o
n p
age 6
7,
an
d t
hen
follo
w t
he i
nstr
uctio
ns.
Go t
o
each p
ers
on w
ho has h
arm
ed yo
u or
som
eone
an
d say "_
___
___
is
sp
iritu
ally
sic
k."
D
on't
forg
et
to say th
e
Resentm
ent
Pra
yer
(Lin
es 3-5
, pag
e 6
7),
"G
od,
ple
ase he
lp m
e show
___
__
___ th
e sa
me
to
lera
nce
, pity a
nd
patience I
wou
ld c
heerf
ully
gra
nt
a s
ick f
riend"
for
each a
nd e
very
pers
on w
ho h
as h
arm
ed y
ou
, th
em
selv
es o
r som
eon
e e
lse in C
olu
mn 1
prior
to s
tart
ing C
olu
mn 4
.
The "BIG BOOK'S" Way to Be Rid of Resentment (pages 6367) INSTRUCTIONS: Affects my: (3)
DON’T FORGET THIS! Core Character Defects (4)
Study from the bottom of page 63 to the end of page 65 and then follow its instructions: a) List all people, institutions and principles (Column 1) from top to bottom. b) List all "causes" (Column 2), top to bottom. c) Do all six instincts in Column 3 from top to bottom for each “cause”. d) Consider the first three columns carefully. e) Then, complete Column 4 from top to bottom. I’m resentful at: (1) The causes: (2)
Self-E
ste
em
Security
(P
kt. B
oo
ks)
Am
bitio
ns
Pers
onal R
ela
tions
Sex R
ela
tions
Is a
ny fear
involv
ed?
"Putting out of our minds the wrongs others have done, [use fold lines to cover Columns 2 and 3] we resolutely looked for our own mistakes. Where had we been selfish, dishonest, self-seeking and frightened? . . . [D]isregard the other person involved entirely. Where were we to blame? . . . When we saw our faults we listed them. We placed them before us in black and white. We admitted our wrongs honestly and were willing to set these matters straight." (page 67)
Stu
dy f
rom
the b
otto
m o
f page 6
5 t
o e
nd o
f th
e 3
rd p
ara
gra
ph o
n p
age 6
7,
an
d t
hen
follo
w t
he i
nstr
uctio
ns.
Go t
o
each p
ers
on w
ho has h
arm
ed yo
u or
som
eone
an
d say "_
___
___
is
sp
iritu
ally
sic
k."
D
on't
forg
et
to say th
e
Resentm
ent
Pra
yer
(Lin
es 3-5
, pag
e 6
7),
"G
od,
ple
ase he
lp m
e show
___
__
___ th
e sa
me
to
lera
nce
, pity a
nd
patience I
wou
ld c
heerf
ully
gra
nt
a s
ick f
riend"
for
each a
nd e
very
pers
on w
ho h
as h
arm
ed y
ou
, th
em
selv
es o
r som
eon
e e
lse in C
olu
mn 1
prior
to s
tart
ing C
olu
mn 4
.
The "BIG BOOK'S" Way to Be Rid of Resentment (pages 6367) INSTRUCTIONS: Affects my: (3)
DON’T FORGET THIS! Core Character Defects (4)
Study from the bottom of page 63 to the end of page 65 and then follow its instructions: a) List all people, institutions and principles (Column 1) from top to bottom. b) List all "causes" (Column 2), top to bottom. c) Do all six instincts in Column 3 from top to bottom for each “cause”. d) Consider the first three columns carefully. e) Then, complete Column 4 from top to bottom. I’m resentful at: (1) The causes: (2)
Self-E
ste
em
Security
(P
kt. B
oo
ks)
Am
bitio
ns
Pers
onal R
ela
tions
Sex R
ela
tions
Is a
ny fear
involv
ed?
"Putting out of our minds the wrongs others have done, [use fold lines to cover Columns 2 and 3] we resolutely looked for our own mistakes. Where had we been selfish, dishonest, self-seeking and frightened? . . . [D]isregard the other person involved entirely. Where were we to blame? . . . When we saw our faults we listed them. We placed them before us in black and white. We admitted our wrongs honestly and were willing to set these matters straight." (page 67)
Stu
dy f
rom
the b
otto
m o
f page 6
5 t
o e
nd o
f th
e 3
rd p
ara
gra
ph o
n p
age 6
7,
an
d t
hen
follo
w t
he i
nstr
uctio
ns.
Go t
o
each p
ers
on w
ho has h
arm
ed yo
u or
som
eone
an
d say "_
___
___
is
sp
iritu
ally
sic
k."
D
on't
forg
et
to say th
e
Resentm
ent
Pra
yer
(Lin
es 3-5
, pag
e 6
7),
"G
od,
ple
ase he
lp m
e show
___
__
___ th
e sa
me
to
lera
nce
, pity a
nd
patience I
wou
ld c
heerf
ully
gra
nt
a s
ick f
riend"
for
each a
nd e
very
pers
on w
ho h
as h
arm
ed y
ou
, th
em
selv
es o
r som
eon
e e
lse in C
olu
mn 1
prior
to s
tart
ing C
olu
mn 4
.
The "BIG BOOK'S" Way to Be Rid of Resentment (pages 6367) INSTRUCTIONS: Affects my: (3)
DON’T FORGET THIS! Core Character Defects (4)
Study from the bottom of page 63 to the end of page 65 and then follow its instructions: a) List all people, institutions and principles (Column 1) from top to bottom. b) List all "causes" (Column 2), top to bottom. c) Do all six instincts in Column 3 from top to bottom for each “cause”. d) Consider the first three columns carefully. e) Then, complete Column 4 from top to bottom. I’m resentful at: (1) The causes: (2)
Self-E
ste
em
Security
(P
kt. B
oo
ks)
Am
bitio
ns
Pers
onal R
ela
tions
Sex R
ela
tions
Is a
ny fear
involv
ed?
"Putting out of our minds the wrongs others have done, [use fold lines to cover Columns 2 and 3] we resolutely looked for our own mistakes. Where had we been selfish, dishonest, self-seeking and frightened? . . . [D]isregard the other person involved entirely. Where were we to blame? . . . When we saw our faults we listed them. We placed them before us in black and white. We admitted our wrongs honestly and were willing to set these matters straight." (page 67)
Stu
dy f
rom
the b
otto
m o
f page 6
5 t
o e
nd o
f th
e 3
rd p
ara
gra
ph o
n p
age 6
7,
an
d t
hen
follo
w t
he i
nstr
uctio
ns.
Go t
o
each p
ers
on w
ho has h
arm
ed yo
u or
som
eone
an
d say "_
___
___
is
sp
iritu
ally
sic
k."
D
on't
forg
et
to say th
e
Resentm
ent
Pra
yer
(Lin
es 3-5
, pag
e 6
7),
"G
od,
ple
ase he
lp m
e show
___
__
___ th
e sa
me
to
lera
nce
, pity a
nd
patience I
wou
ld c
heerf
ully
gra
nt
a s
ick f
riend"
for
each a
nd e
very
pers
on w
ho h
as h
arm
ed y
ou
, th
em
selv
es o
r som
eon
e e
lse in C
olu
mn 1
prior
to s
tart
ing C
olu
mn 4
.
The "BIG BOOK'S" Way to Be Rid of Resentment (pages 6367) INSTRUCTIONS: Affects my: (3)
DON’T FORGET THIS! Core Character Defects (4)
Study from the bottom of page 63 to the end of page 65 and then follow its instructions: a) List all people, institutions and principles (Column 1) from top to bottom. b) List all "causes" (Column 2), top to bottom. c) Do all six instincts in Column 3 from top to bottom for each “cause”. d) Consider the first three columns carefully. e) Then, complete Column 4 from top to bottom. I’m resentful at: (1) The causes: (2)
Self-E
ste
em
Security
(P
kt. B
oo
ks)
Am
bitio
ns
Pers
onal R
ela
tions
Sex R
ela
tions
Is a
ny fear
involv
ed?
"Putting out of our minds the wrongs others have done, [use fold lines to cover Columns 2 and 3] we resolutely looked for our own mistakes. Where had we been selfish, dishonest, self-seeking and frightened? . . . [D]isregard the other person involved entirely. Where were we to blame? . . . When we saw our faults we listed them. We placed them before us in black and white. We admitted our wrongs honestly and were willing to set these matters straight." (page 67)
Stu
dy f
rom
the b
otto
m o
f page 6
5 t
o e
nd o
f th
e 3
rd p
ara
gra
ph o
n p
age 6
7,
an
d t
hen
follo
w t
he i
nstr
uctio
ns.
Go t
o
each p
ers
on w
ho has h
arm
ed yo
u or
som
eone
an
d say "_
___
___
is
sp
iritu
ally
sic
k."
D
on't
forg
et
to say th
e
Resentm
ent
Pra
yer
(Lin
es 3-5
, pag
e 6
7),
"G
od,
ple
ase he
lp m
e show
___
__
___ th
e sa
me
to
lera
nce
, pity a
nd
patience I
wou
ld c
heerf
ully
gra
nt
a s
ick f
riend"
for
each a
nd e
very
pers
on w
ho h
as h
arm
ed y
ou
, th
em
selv
es o
r som
eon
e e
lse in C
olu
mn 1
prior
to s
tart
ing C
olu
mn 4
.
The "BIG BOOK'S" Way to Be Rid of Resentment (pages 6367) INSTRUCTIONS: Affects my: (3)
DON’T FORGET THIS! Core Character Defects (4)
Study from the bottom of page 63 to the end of page 65 and then follow its instructions: a) List all people, institutions and principles (Column 1) from top to bottom. b) List all "causes" (Column 2), top to bottom. c) Do all six instincts in Column 3 from top to bottom for each “cause”. d) Consider the first three columns carefully. e) Then, complete Column 4 from top to bottom. I’m resentful at: (1) The causes: (2)
Self-E
ste
em
Security
(P
kt. B
oo
ks)
Am
bitio
ns
Pers
onal R
ela
tions
Sex R
ela
tions
Is a
ny fear
involv
ed?
"Putting out of our minds the wrongs others have done, [use fold lines to cover Columns 2 and 3] we resolutely looked for our own mistakes. Where had we been selfish, dishonest, self-seeking and frightened? . . . [D]isregard the other person involved entirely. Where were we to blame? . . . When we saw our faults we listed them. We placed them before us in black and white. We admitted our wrongs honestly and were willing to set these matters straight." (page 67)
Stu
dy f
rom
the b
otto
m o
f page 6
5 t
o e
nd o
f th
e 3
rd p
ara
gra
ph o
n p
age 6
7,
an
d t
hen
follo
w t
he i
nstr
uctio
ns.
Go t
o
each p
ers
on w
ho has h
arm
ed yo
u or
som
eone
an
d say "_
___
___
is
sp
iritu
ally
sic
k."
D
on't
forg
et
to say th
e
Resentm
ent
Pra
yer
(Lin
es 3-5
, pag
e 6
7),
"G
od,
ple
ase he
lp m
e show
___
__
___ th
e sa
me
to
lera
nce
, pity a
nd
patience I
wou
ld c
heerf
ully
gra
nt
a s
ick f
riend"
for
each a
nd e
very
pers
on w
ho h
as h
arm
ed y
ou
, th
em
selv
es o
r som
eon
e e
lse in C
olu
mn 1
prior
to s
tart
ing C
olu
mn 4
.
The "BIG BOOK'S" Way to Be Rid of Resentment (pages 6367) INSTRUCTIONS: Affects my: (3)
DON’T FORGET THIS! Core Character Defects (4)
Study from the bottom of page 63 to the end of page 65 and then follow its instructions: a) List all people, institutions and principles (Column 1) from top to bottom. b) List all "causes" (Column 2), top to bottom. c) Do all six instincts in Column 3 from top to bottom for each “cause”. d) Consider the first three columns carefully. e) Then, complete Column 4 from top to bottom. I’m resentful at: (1) The causes: (2)
Self-E
ste
em
Security
(P
kt. B
oo
ks)
Am
bitio
ns
Pers
onal R
ela
tions
Sex R
ela
tions
Is a
ny fear
involv
ed?
"Putting out of our minds the wrongs others have done, [use fold lines to cover Columns 2 and 3] we resolutely looked for our own mistakes. Where had we been selfish, dishonest, self-seeking and frightened? . . . [D]isregard the other person involved entirely. Where were we to blame? . . . When we saw our faults we listed them. We placed them before us in black and white. We admitted our wrongs honestly and were willing to set these matters straight." (page 67)
Stu
dy f
rom
the b
otto
m o
f page 6
5 t
o e
nd o
f th
e 3
rd p
ara
gra
ph o
n p
age 6
7,
an
d t
hen
follo
w t
he i
nstr
uctio
ns.
Go t
o
each p
ers
on w
ho has h
arm
ed yo
u or
som
eone
an
d say "_
___
___
is
sp
iritu
ally
sic
k."
D
on't
forg
et
to say th
e
Resentm
ent
Pra
yer
(Lin
es 3-5
, pag
e 6
7),
"G
od,
ple
ase he
lp m
e show
___
__
___ th
e sa
me
to
lera
nce
, pity a
nd
patience I
wou
ld c
heerf
ully
gra
nt
a s
ick f
riend"
for
each a
nd e
very
pers
on w
ho h
as h
arm
ed y
ou
, th
em
selv
es o
r som
eon
e e
lse in C
olu
mn 1
prior
to s
tart
ing C
olu
mn 4
.
THE BIG BOOK’S WAY OF REMOVING FEARS (PP. 67 & 68) INSTRUCTIONS: a) Study from the bottom of page 67 to the bottom of page 68 in the book Alcoholics Anonymous. b) Complete column 1 (listing whom or what I am fearful of), from top to bottom. c) Complete the remaining columns from top to bottom for each fear in column 1. Remember that “we are now on a different basis; the basis of trusting and relying upon God. We trust infinite God rather than our finite selves. . . . Just to the extent that we do as we think He would have us, and humbly rely on Him, does He enable us to match calamity with serenity” (page 68).
I’m fearful of: (1) Why do I have the fear? (2) Where was my trust &
reliance? (3)
Did self reliance work?
(4)
Fear Prayer: “God, please remove my fear and direct my attention to what you would have me be” (5)
What would God have you be? Write out your answer to that question for each and every fear listed. (6)
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
THE BIG BOOK’S WAY OF REMOVING FEARS (PP. 67 & 68) INSTRUCTIONS: a) Study from the bottom of page 67 to the bottom of page 68 in the book Alcoholics Anonymous. b) Complete column 1 (listing whom or what I am fearful of), from top to bottom. c) Complete the remaining columns from top to bottom for each fear in column 1. Remember that “we are now on a different basis; the basis of trusting and relying upon God. We trust infinite God rather than our finite selves. . . . Just to the extent that we do as we think He would have us, and humbly rely on Him, does He enable us to match calamity with serenity” (page 68).
I’m fearful of: (1) Why do I have the fear? (2) Where was my trust &
reliance? (3)
Did self reliance work?
(4)
Fear Prayer: “God, please remove my fear and direct my attention to what you would have me be” (5)
What would God have you be? Write out your answer to that question for each and every fear listed. (6)
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
THE BIG BOOK’S WAY OF REMOVING FEARS (PP. 67 & 68) INSTRUCTIONS: a) Study from the bottom of page 67 to the bottom of page 68 in the book Alcoholics Anonymous. b) Complete column 1 (listing whom or what I am fearful of), from top to bottom. c) Complete the remaining columns from top to bottom for each fear in column 1. Remember that “we are now on a different basis; the basis of trusting and relying upon God. We trust infinite God rather than our finite selves. . . . Just to the extent that we do as we think He would have us, and humbly rely on Him, does He enable us to match calamity with serenity” (page 68).
I’m fearful of: (1) Why do I have the fear? (2) Where was my trust &
reliance? (3)
Did self reliance work?
(4)
Fear Prayer: “God, please remove my fear and direct my attention to what you would have me be” (5)
What would God have you be? Write out your answer to that question for each and every fear listed. (6)
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
THE BIG BOOK’S WAY OF REMOVING FEARS (PP. 67 & 68) INSTRUCTIONS: a) Study from the bottom of page 67 to the bottom of page 68 in the book Alcoholics Anonymous. b) Complete column 1 (listing whom or what I am fearful of), from top to bottom. c) Complete the remaining columns from top to bottom for each fear in column 1. Remember that “we are now on a different basis; the basis of trusting and relying upon God. We trust infinite God rather than our finite selves. . . . Just to the extent that we do as we think He would have us, and humbly rely on Him, does He enable us to match calamity with serenity” (page 68).
I’m fearful of: (1) Why do I have the fear? (2) Where was my trust &
reliance? (3)
Did self reliance work?
(4)
Fear Prayer: “God, please remove my fear and direct my attention to what you would have me be” (5)
What would God have you be? Write out your answer to that question for each and every fear listed. (6)
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
COMPLETED FEAR PRAYER?
THE BIG BOOK’S WAY TO “SENSIBLY OVERHAUL” OUR OWN SEX CONDUCT (Pages 6870)
Whom did I hurt? (1)
Where was I (2) Did I
arouse: (3) Where was I at fault, what should I have done
instead? (4)
Was each relation?
(5)
Sex Prayer
Page 69(6)
Sex Meditation Page 69(7)
The Earnest Prayers page 70
Selfish: Dishonest:
Inconsiderate:
S E L F I S H
“God, please
mold my ideals
and help me to
live up to them.”
“God, please
show me what to
do about this[each] specific matter”
Selfish: Dishonest:
Inconsiderate:
S E L F I S H
“God,
please mold my
ideals and help
me to live up to
them.”
“God, please
show me what to
do about this[each] specific matter”
Selfish:
Dishonest:
Inconsiderate:
S E L F I S H
“God, please
mold my ideals
and help me to
live up to them.”
“God, please
show me what to
do about this[each] specific matter”
We earnestly pray for: The right ideal
Guidance in each questionable situation
Sanity
The strength
to do the right thing
If sex is
troublesome, we throw ourselves the harder into helping others.
We think of
their needs and work for them.
This takes us
out of ourselves.
It quiets the
imperious urge, when to yield would mean heartache.
INSTRUCTIONS: a) Study from the bottom of page 68 to the end of third paragraph on page 70. b) Fill in Column 1from top to bottom. c) Do Column 2 from top to bottom. d) Fill in each of the remaining columns from top to bottom. Do not work across the page from left to right. Don’t forget the Sex Prayer (“God, please mold my ideals and help me to live up to them”) on page 69, and the Big Book’s Sex Meditation (“God, please show me what to do about this [each] specific matter”) on page 69. “The right answer will come if we want it”. This will shape a “sane and sound ideal for our future sex life” (page 69). Be sure to restudy what happens if we “fall short of the chosen ideal and stumble” on page 70. Be sure to continue to pray the “Earnest” prayers from page 70 (on the right hand side of this page) for ongoing guidance, strength, sanity, and the right ideal.
THE BIG BOOK’S WAY TO “SENSIBLY OVERHAUL” OUR OWN SEX CONDUCT (Pages 6870)
Whom did I hurt? (1)
Where was I (2) Did I
arouse: (3) Where was I at fault, what should I have done
instead? (4)
Was each relation?
(5)
Sex Prayer
Page 69(6)
Sex Meditation Page 69(7)
The Earnest Prayers page 70
Selfish: Dishonest:
Inconsiderate:
S E L F I S H
“God, please
mold my ideals
and help me to
live up to them.”
“God, please
show me what to
do about this[each] specific matter”
Selfish: Dishonest:
Inconsiderate:
S E L F I S H
“God,
please mold my
ideals and help
me to live up to
them.”
“God, please
show me what to
do about this[each] specific matter”
Selfish:
Dishonest:
Inconsiderate:
S E L F I S H
“God, please
mold my ideals
and help me to
live up to them.”
“God, please
show me what to
do about this[each] specific matter”
We earnestly pray for: The right ideal
Guidance in each questionable situation
Sanity
The strength
to do the right thing
If sex is
troublesome, we throw ourselves the harder into helping others.
We think of
their needs and work for them.
This takes us
out of ourselves.
It quiets the
imperious urge, when to yield would mean heartache.
INSTRUCTIONS: a) Study from the bottom of page 68 to the end of third paragraph on page 70. b) Fill in Column 1from top to bottom. c) Do Column 2 from top to bottom. d) Fill in each of the remaining columns from top to bottom. Do not work across the page from left to right. Don’t forget the Sex Prayer (“God, please mold my ideals and help me to live up to them”) on page 69, and the Big Book’s Sex Meditation (“God, please show me what to do about this [each] specific matter”) on page 69. “The right answer will come if we want it”. This will shape a “sane and sound ideal for our future sex life” (page 69). Be sure to restudy what happens if we “fall short of the chosen ideal and stumble” on page 70. Be sure to continue to pray the “Earnest” prayers from page 70 (on the right hand side of this page) for ongoing guidance, strength, sanity, and the right ideal.
THE BIG BOOK’S WAY TO “SENSIBLY OVERHAUL” OUR OWN SEX CONDUCT (Pages 6870)
Whom did I hurt? (1)
Where was I (2) Did I
arouse: (3) Where was I at fault, what should I have done
instead? (4)
Was each relation?
(5)
Sex Prayer
Page 69(6)
Sex Meditation Page 69(7)
The Earnest Prayers page 70
Selfish: Dishonest:
Inconsiderate:
S E L F I S H
“God, please
mold my ideals
and help me to
live up to them.”
“God, please
show me what to
do about this[each] specific matter”
Selfish: Dishonest:
Inconsiderate:
S E L F I S H
“God,
please mold my
ideals and help
me to live up to
them.”
“God, please
show me what to
do about this[each] specific matter”
Selfish:
Dishonest:
Inconsiderate:
S E L F I S H
“God, please
mold my ideals
and help me to
live up to them.”
“God, please
show me what to
do about this[each] specific matter”
We earnestly pray for: The right ideal
Guidance in each questionable situation
Sanity
The strength
to do the right thing
If sex is
troublesome, we throw ourselves the harder into helping others.
We think of
their needs and work for them.
This takes us
out of ourselves.
It quiets the
imperious urge, when to yield would mean heartache.
INSTRUCTIONS: a) Study from the bottom of page 68 to the end of third paragraph on page 70. b) Fill in Column 1from top to bottom. c) Do Column 2 from top to bottom. d) Fill in each of the remaining columns from top to bottom. Do not work across the page from left to right. Don’t forget the Sex Prayer (“God, please mold my ideals and help me to live up to them”) on page 69, and the Big Book’s Sex Meditation (“God, please show me what to do about this [each] specific matter”) on page 69. “The right answer will come if we want it”. This will shape a “sane and sound ideal for our future sex life” (page 69). Be sure to restudy what happens if we “fall short of the chosen ideal and stumble” on page 70. Be sure to continue to pray the “Earnest” prayers from page 70 (on the right hand side of this page) for ongoing guidance, strength, sanity, and the right ideal.
THE BIG BOOK’S WAY TO “SENSIBLY OVERHAUL” OUR OWN SEX CONDUCT (Pages 6870)
Whom did I hurt? (1)
Where was I (2) Did I
arouse: (3) Where was I at fault, what should I have done
instead? (4)
Was each relation?
(5)
Sex Prayer
Page 69(6)
Sex Meditation Page 69(7)
The Earnest Prayers page 70
Selfish: Dishonest:
Inconsiderate:
S E L F I S H
“God, please
mold my ideals
and help me to
live up to them.”
“God, please
show me what to
do about this[each] specific matter”
Selfish: Dishonest:
Inconsiderate:
S E L F I S H
“God,
please mold my
ideals and help
me to live up to
them.”
“God, please
show me what to
do about this[each] specific matter”
Selfish:
Dishonest:
Inconsiderate:
S E L F I S H
“God, please
mold my ideals
and help me to
live up to them.”
“God, please
show me what to
do about this[each] specific matter”
We earnestly pray for: The right ideal
Guidance in each questionable situation
Sanity
The strength
to do the right thing
If sex is
troublesome, we throw ourselves the harder into helping others.
We think of
their needs and work for them.
This takes us
out of ourselves.
It quiets the
imperious urge, when to yield would mean heartache.
INSTRUCTIONS: a) Study from the bottom of page 68 to the end of third paragraph on page 70. b) Fill in Column 1from top to bottom. c) Do Column 2 from top to bottom. d) Fill in each of the remaining columns from top to bottom. Do not work across the page from left to right. Don’t forget the Sex Prayer (“God, please mold my ideals and help me to live up to them”) on page 69, and the Big Book’s Sex Meditation (“God, please show me what to do about this [each] specific matter”) on page 69. “The right answer will come if we want it”. This will shape a “sane and sound ideal for our future sex life” (page 69). Be sure to restudy what happens if we “fall short of the chosen ideal and stumble” on page 70. Be sure to continue to pray the “Earnest” prayers from page 70 (on the right hand side of this page) for ongoing guidance, strength, sanity, and the right ideal.
This form is not taken in its entirety from the Big Book, but is a useful guide. Fill out the form directly from the saved copies of your Fourth Step Inventory worksheets. Complete all Amends marked in the “Now?” column. When done, move the items from the “Sometime?” column to “Now?” and the “Never!” items to “Sometime?” You’ll find that the Nevers have turned into Sometimes, and the Sometimes into Nows. Continue this process until you complete all items on your Ninth Step.
STEP EIGHT AND NINE LIST
Ready to do the Amend(s)…
Name of person harmed:
Harm done to that person: Possible Amend(s) for that harm (Apology, Restitution, Public Acknowledgement, Living)
Will this Amend harm that person or anyone else?
Now? Some-time?
Never!
This form is not taken in its entirety from the Big Book, but is a useful guide. Fill out the form directly from the saved copies of your Fourth Step Inventory worksheets. Complete all Amends marked in the “Now?” column. When done, move the items from the “Sometime?” column to “Now?” and the “Never!” items to “Sometime?” You’ll find that the Nevers have turned into Sometimes, and the Sometimes into Nows. Continue this process until you complete all items on your Ninth Step.
STEP EIGHT AND NINE LIST
Ready to do the Amend(s)…
Name of person harmed:
Harm done to that person: Possible Amend(s) for that harm (Apology, Restitution, Public Acknowledgement, Living)
Will this Amend harm that person or anyone else?
Now? Some-time?
Never!
This form is not taken in its entirety from the Big Book, but is a useful guide. Fill out the form directly from the saved copies of your Fourth Step Inventory worksheets. Complete all Amends marked in the “Now?” column. When done, move the items from the “Sometime?” column to “Now?” and the “Never!” items to “Sometime?” You’ll find that the Nevers have turned into Sometimes, and the Sometimes into Nows. Continue this process until you complete all items on your Ninth Step.
STEP EIGHT AND NINE LIST
Ready to do the Amend(s)…
Name of person harmed:
Harm done to that person: Possible Amend(s) for that harm (Apology, Restitution, Public Acknowledgement, Living)
Will this Amend harm that person or anyone else?
Now? Some-time?
Never!
This form is not taken in its entirety from the Big Book, but is a useful guide. Fill out the form directly from the saved copies of your Fourth Step Inventory worksheets. Complete all Amends marked in the “Now?” column. When done, move the items from the “Sometime?” column to “Now?” and the “Never!” items to “Sometime?” You’ll find that the Nevers have turned into Sometimes, and the Sometimes into Nows. Continue this process until you complete all items on your Ninth Step.
STEP EIGHT AND NINE LIST
Ready to do the Amend(s)…
Name of person harmed:
Harm done to that person: Possible Amend(s) for that harm (Apology, Restitution, Public Acknowledgement, Living)
Will this Amend harm that person or anyone else?
Now? Some-time?
Never!