The Myth of Manhood

A world crisis

Be a Man The last time some one told you to “man up” or

“be a Man” what were they telling you to do? Examples: Jump off something, fight someone, try

a drug, chug a beer drink shots etc…. What were you labeled if you did not do it?

List the names We are going to look at what defines a man from

a variety of angles.

Class discussion

Pop culture images on successful men

According to pop culture what makes a man valuable? Imagine the hip hop videos that you have

seen. What things do they portray as valuable in men?

You call them out I will post them on the board.

If you look at this list you can put them all in three categories

BallfieldBillfoldBedroom

Ballfield fallacy

Physical ability makes you a MAN How strong, how “swole”, how athletic you are makes you a

MAN. The better man is the one who is bigger, stronger or faster.

All great ballplayers are great men? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jLXlA-S2OOM&

feature=related

We have too many examples of great athletes who are poor male role models. We do have some that are great models as well.

What do you think? Does athleticism and strength define great men?

Billfold fallacy

How much money you have makes you a MAN How much “bling”, how much money you show off

is what makes a MAN. The better man is the richer flashier man.

Rich people are always great role models?

Throughout history there have been many wealthy people who were very poor role models.

There are many wealthy humanitarians as well, but it is clear that wealth does not determine the quality of a man.

What do you think?Does wealth define a great man?

Bedroom fallacy

How many women you sleep with makes you a MAN How many notches on your bedpost is what measures a

MAN. The better man is the one who uses more women.

Great men are ones who sleep with a lot of women? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w1sPvLp

G0T4

Case in point / Tiger Woods

Tiger was extremely successful on the ballfield, his billfold is that of small countries, and he has slept with many beautiful women.

Would you say Tiger is a great example of a highly successful man?Why not?

American Crisis / World crisis Destructive cycle- Men today are often under

pressure to conform to two roles that do not match each other.

Being a successful man based on the warped values of ballfield, billfold and bedroom do not match with being a successful father and husband.

This leads to broken homes and absent fathers and a stronger influence of pop cultures’ three B’s on the child of an absent father.

It is a crisis cycle that makes true manhood increasingly rare!

We all know the most valuable man is a good father and husband.

Does Ball field, Billfold and Bedroom define a good father and husband?

What is the real list? Call out what are the characteristics of a

True Man.

Difficult to be a true man Look at both our lists. Where are the traits like caring,

understanding, and loving? They were absent on the first list and not priorities on the second list either.

It is not surprising many men have difficulty expressing these emotions.

What are the roles that great men play?

Call them out I will list them. Of these roles which do you think is most

important? Discuss (hero, son, leader, father, role

model and husband)

Class discussion

Group breakout Divide into groups What do you think are the contributing sources of

the warped values of the three B’s? Do you agree we are faced with a crisis of

manhood? How can we help change this negative trend? Read handout on real heroes.

What can we do? First understand that the three B’s are lies,

warped values and “dust in the wind”. What matters, what is significant, what remains is our impact on others, especially those we love.

Understand the pressures and the factors involved and focus in the two main roles of a True Man: Father and Husband. If those are on track work on role model / hero.

Closure video

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zJQdi_4xYfQ&feature=related