The Quest for Authentic ManhoodThe Quest for Authentic Manhood

““Saddle Up!”Saddle Up!”For the Second HalfFor the Second Half

Session 14Session 14

VISION

VisionVision is critical to is critical to authentic manhood! authentic manhood!

PRESUPPOSITIONS

1.1. Manhood is in a state ofManhood is in a state of confusion.confusion.

2.2. ConfusedConfused men create majormen create major problems.problems.

3.3. ConfusedConfused men settle formen settle for less.less.

4.4. There is no loftyThere is no lofty visionvision of manhood of manhood that is compelling to men today.that is compelling to men today.

5.5. TheThe BibleBible has insight and answers to has insight and answers to all of the above.all of the above.

How blessed is the man who How blessed is the man who delights in the word of God. delights in the word of God. He will be like a tree firmly He will be like a tree firmly

planted, whose leaf does not planted, whose leaf does not wither … and whatever wither … and whatever he does, he prospers.he does, he prospers.

Psalm 1Psalm 1

PROMISES

1.1. You will have a clear You will have a clear definitiondefinition of manhood. of manhood.

2.2. You will make some significant personal You will make some significant personal discoveriesdiscoveries about yourself. about yourself.

3.3. You will make new You will make new friends.friends.

4.4. You will learn a new manhood You will learn a new manhood language.language.

5.5. You will have a personalized You will have a personalized planplan for achieving authentic manhood.for achieving authentic manhood.

UNPACKING WOUNDS

1.1. The The Absent FatherAbsent Father Wound Wound

2.2. The The Overly-Bonded with Mother Overly-Bonded with Mother Wound Wound

3.3. The The All Alone All Alone WoundWound

4.4. The The Heart Heart WoundWound

YOU CANYOU CAN HARDEN HARDEN IN IN YOUR WOUNDEDNESSYOUR WOUNDEDNESS

Stage 1Stage 1Every man begins life without God. His nature is selfish and

self-centered.

Stage 2Stage 2As a son … Every man suffers hurts (small or large) growing

up.

Hardened in Woundedness

Stage 3Stage 3

As a young man … He constructs his manhood

from these selfish and wounded perspectives. Often he uses his woundedness as

energy to fuel and excuse his own excessive or evil behaviors.

Hardened in Woundedness

Stage 4Stage 4

As a man … He is driven by these forces he doesn’t

understand and refuses to examine. Circumstances and

others are blamed for his problems and failures. This

approach to life creates pain for himself and for those

around him.

Hardened in Woundedness

Stage 5Stage 5

Wealthy men often seek to buy their way out of their pain. Other men seek to

escape their pain with drugs, alcohol, porn, TV, affairs,

sports, etc. Both continue to refuse to admit the truth

about themselves.

Hardened in Woundedness

Stage 6Stage 6

In time … selfish and wounded manhood

hardens. As a man grows old,

life becomes small (me), empty, mundane, bitter,

or reckless.

Hardened in Woundedness

YOU CAN BEYOU CAN BE DELIVERED DELIVERED FROM FROM

YOUR WOUNDEDNESSYOUR WOUNDEDNESS

Stage 1Stage 1Stage 2Stage 2Stage 3Stage 3Stage 4Stage 4Stage 5Stage 5Stage 6Stage 6

Discovers the truth about himself; Recognizes his selfish, godless nature;

Accepts responsibility for his life and problems; Stops

blaming others; Grieves over his losses in life and poor

choices.

Delivered From Woundedness

Discovers the truth about himself; Recognizes his selfish, godless nature;

Accepts responsibility for his life and problems; Stops

blaming others; Grieves over his losses in life and poor

choices.Turns to faith in Turns to faith in

Jesus ChristJesus Christ for help for help

Delivered From Woundedness

``And not many days later, the younger son gathered everything together and went on a journey into a

distant country, and there he squandered his estate with loose living. ``Now when he had spent

everything, a severe famine occurred in that country, and he began to be impoverished. ``So he went and

hired himself out to one of the citizens of that country, and he sent him into his fields to feed

swine.

Luke 15:13-15 (NASB)

The Story of ManhoodThe Story of Manhood

``And he would have gladly filled his stomach with the pods that the swine were eating, and no one was giving anything to him. ``But when he came to his senses, he said, `How many of my

father's hired men have more than enough bread, but I am dying here with hunger! `I will get up

and go to my father, and will say to him, ``Father, I have sinned against heaven, and in your sight; I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make

me as one of your hired men.'''

Luke 15:16-19 (NASB)

The Story of ManhoodThe Story of Manhood

So he got up and came to his father. But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion for him, and ran and embraced , him

and kissed him. ``And the son said to him, `Father, I have sinned against heaven and in your sight; I am no longer worthy to be called your son.' ``But the father said to his slaves, `Quickly bring out the best robe and put it on him, and put a ring on his

hand and sandals on his feet;

Luke 15:20-22 (NASB)

The Story of ManhoodThe Story of Manhood

and bring the fattened calf, kill it, and let us eat and celebrate; for this son of mine was dead and has

come to life again; he was lost and has been found.' And they began to celebrate.

Luke 15:23-24 (NASB)

The Story of ManhoodThe Story of Manhood

Discovers the truth about himself; Recognizes his selfish, godless nature;

Accepts responsibility for his life and problems; Stops

blaming others; Grieves over his losses in life and poor

choices.Turns to faith in Turns to faith in

Jesus ChristJesus Christ for help for help

Born Born

AgainAgain

Pursues a Pursues a new new lifelife

with with Christ:Christ:• • HopeHope• • HealthHealth• • HappinessHappiness

Delivered From Woundedness

Therefore if any man Therefore if any man is in Christ, he is a new is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things creature; the old things passed away; behold, passed away; behold, new things have come.new things have come.

2 Corinthians 5:172 Corinthians 5:17

SUMMARY OBSERVATIONS

1.1. Rather than numbing out to his wounds or being Rather than numbing out to his wounds or being enraged by them, the new man in Christ enraged by them, the new man in Christ unpacksunpacks them. He embraces these hurts, feels them, and them. He embraces these hurts, feels them, and deals with them in appropriate ways.deals with them in appropriate ways.

2.2. Rather than blaming others for his life, the new Rather than blaming others for his life, the new man in Christ accepts man in Christ accepts personal responsibilitypersonal responsibility for it. for it.

3.3. Rather than ignoring the masculinity of Jesus Rather than ignoring the masculinity of Jesus Christ, the new man in Christ becomes eager to Christ, the new man in Christ becomes eager to pursue it.pursue it. And as he does, a new manhood And as he does, a new manhood emerges.emerges.