Total HealthChapter 13

Maturity:

What’s it all About

Standing Up to Temptation

• “No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, He will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.”

1 Corinthians 10:13

Define

• Temptation

• Seized you

• Common to man

• Faithfulness

• Tempted

• To stand up

“But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His wonderful light.”

• a chosen people,• a royal priesthood, • a holy nation, • a people belonging to God,• Darkness• Wonderful light

• Write what that means to you and to God.

Submitting to Authority

“Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God.”

Romans 13:1

Define

• Submit

• Governing Authority

• Establish

• Remember to really think about this verse this week;

• Look at the other bible versions of this verse;

• Let your meditations turn into prayers, talking with God;

• Ask God to reveal and show you special things about it;

• Consider defining key words in the verse;• He may encourage or correct you;• Write down what you think He may be

telling you about this verse

Homework

Your brain

• The human brain is a complex organ and is the highest part of your human design.

• Its functions are endless and its importance is immeasurable. Among its countless functions, you brain has the capacity to store information, to draw conclusions from that information, to send messages of feeling and sensation to the body, to cause body movements, to make difficult decisions and to discern between right and wrong.

Your brain

• Is like a library with endless shelves of books. Volumes of information are stored on the “shelves” of your brain. What you receive in your mind, you categorize and store in these volumes.

• Not everyone’s library looks the same or holds the same number of volumes containing the same information.

• However, mixed in with these rows and rows of knowledge and stored information are volumes of wisdom and common sense that the creator has given to the human race.

“The human race is unlike any other living being…You are capable of reflecting on all that makes your life different, for example: how you came to be, where you want to go, how you want to live and what you want to do. I could talk all day to a giraffe but it wouldn’t be any wiser in the end.”

Dr. Paul Brand

What does this mean to you?

• God created you with the ability and free will to make your own decisions and choices.

• How are you going to make positive choices?

• The information you have gathered and continue to gather will help you make these choices.

Your Library• If we looked in your library we would see

volumes and volumes of stored information. Math, history, cooking, science and writing facts to name a few.

• Somewhere among your volumes you have stored information concerning social and personal issues. You may want to continue storing this information for a later time when you need it. You may need to replace and update stored information.

The Body-Mind-Spirit Connection

“I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service.

2: And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your Mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.

3: For I say, through the grace given to me, to everyone who is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think soberly, as God has dealt to each one a measure of faith.”

Romans 12: 1-3

But be transformed by the renewing of your mind…..

• How do you renew your mind?

• Why would you even want to renew your mind?

Our Battle

• Is a continual fight against the wants of our flesh.

• The flesh wants its way all the time. Feed me, I want to sleep, I want to do it may way.

• How we overcome our flesh (put our fleshly desires under) is to renew our minds with the word of God. That is how we keep ourselves unto righteousness. (God’s right way of doing things.)

Our Foundation

• Our foundation for how we govern our lives is the word of God. Period.

• This is not just for teenagers, but for our whole lives.

We live in an “instant” society… But this “right now” mentality can be dangerous… Right choices, on the other hand, often require waiting for better long-term results.”

-Josh McDowell

• The benefits of making right choices are not always instantaneous. It is often difficult to think seriously about how your choices will affect your future.

• Consequently, when you feel the pain of a wrong decision, it helps you make a better choice next time.

Experience is a good teacher !?

• Unfortunately, some experiences produce much pain and heartache, and what people often overlook is the fact that many of the decisions you make affect others.

• We are to help our brothers and sisters in Christ to live godly lives, strengthening their walk with the Lord and not putting pressure on them to compromise themselves to govern their lives according to the word of God.

Iron Sharpening Iron• Easier said than done. As teenagers….

• We live in an age of instant communication, a telephone in your hip pocket, text messaging, facebook, and the internet.

• Our much improved standard of living lends itself to entertainment rather than working to for basic necessities.

• Transportation allows us to travel faster and farther in a day that just 112 years ago. At that time it would have taken an individual all day to go 11 miles on a horse or in a wagon.

So with all of this Societal improvement…

• I am sure you have heard adults say that kids are growing up earlier and earlier every year. But are they really?

• Why do you think they say that?

• Would they say that about you?

• One aspect of maturity is the ability to make wise decisions. Measuring an individual’s maturity level is very difficult.

• God has put your parents in authority over you. They are training you to be obedient and teaching you to be wise.

• One day very soon you will be on your own to make your own decisions, good or bad, you will have to live with them.

• When you are young you listen to and obey your parents. That is training for….

• When you are not under your parents authority you listen to and obey God’s leading.

• The Holy Spirit will lead you and teach you. That is why it is so important to train yourself now to listen to His small voice. Study His word, know what it says. That will always lead you to His right way of doing things – Righteousness.

• That is why it is so very important to practice hearing from God when you pray and read His word. Your prayer journal this year has been this type of exercise.

• This area, if developed will save your life from so many sorrows and wrong decisions.

• It takes discipline and a consistent habit to practice and to be obedient. This is nothing that anyone wants to hear.

• Your flesh is screaming right now, isn’t it?

• Practice putting your flesh under and renew your mind with the word of God.

Here’s some good Word…

 20: My son, pay attention to what I say;     turn your ear to My words.

21: Do not let them out of your sight,     keep them within your heart;

22: for they are life to those who find them     and health to one’s whole body.

Proverbs 4:20-22 (NIV)

Just as your total health includes your physical, mental, social and spiritual health, so it is with your total maturity.

• Science has shown that in general a female’s brain matures before a male’s brain at age 25.

• In some cultures young men and women must perform a task to prove their maturity. Other cultures believe that turning a certain age determines the level of maturity.

• Maturity itself is a difficult concept to define.

• It is often easier to notice signs of emotional immaturity in a person than signs of maturity.

Signs of Maturity1. Has self-control: thinks through things

before acting, controls words, anger, love and other emotions.

2. Recognized godly values: makes good judgments concerning money, time, friends.

3. Recognizes the importance of setting goals: realizes that there is value in preparing for the future. For example, studies not only for grades but for learning.

4. Stands up for what is right even when persecuted: does not go along with the crowd.

5. Assumes responsibility for actions: does not place blame on others.

6. Avoids compromising situations.

7. Avoids being judgmental or critical of others: does not gossip about others.

8. Is able to be trusted: able to keep confidential information private.

9. Respects others: forms mature relationships with others.

10.Has more concern for others: not so self-centered and selfish.

Do a Self-Check

• Think for a moment and evaluate your own level of maturity, keeping in mind that you cannot “become mature” in your own strength.

• Maturing is what it means to move forward in the process, and growth in every area shows that Christ is working in you.

• When you think someone is mature, what characteristics do you notice?

• These are not signs that everyone consistently shows on their own.

Take a big risk….

• Privately sit down with your Mom or Dad and ask them honestly how they think you measure up.

• Go through the list and have a serious and frank discussion.

• This will truly help you and who better to ask than your parents who truly know and love you.

• Ask the Lord to help you in this ongoing maturing process.

Forming Boundaries• A boundary is something that indicates a

limit, something that is not to be crossed or passed through.

• A fence is a form of boundary for defining a particular area.

• Parents place limits on children to keep them from an accident.

• Some boundaries are very clear and accepted, while others are more difficult to accept.

• Adults try to help you shape your won convictions about certain issues by placing boundaries in your life.

• As you grow older and show more responsibility, those boundaries are often lifted or extended.

• How much you allow God and others to influence your life will help fine tune your “gut” feeling or conscience.

• God does not place boundaries in your life so He can watch you fail. He gives you boundaries to protect you.

• Other may not always understand how hard it is to stay on the straight and narrow path, but you can be assured that God knows.

• Don’t try to handle things on your own. A sign of spiritual maturity is acknowledging that you cannot overcome on your own strength.

• God and others are there to help.

Becoming a Winner in Life

• The most successful people have an accountability person in their lives.

• This is someone who is older and who has a proven track record of success. Allow them to speak into your life to help you make those decisions that are tough. You will be faced with many of those throughout your life.

Curiosity

• As youngsters grow up they have a natural curiosity that causes them to investigate things.

• An infant explores toys by placing them in his mouth, a toddler uses his imagination and creates a world or make-believe.

Teenagers

• As teenagers, your bodies are changing, hormones are raging, your curiosity in the areas of sex are normal.

• It is what you allow yourself to think about and investigate that can cause you problems.

Renew your Mind …..

“For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds,  casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ,”

2 Corinthians 10:4-5

When God created Adam and Eve…

• He knew He made something good. He said so. His desire was that they would be fruitful and multiply.

• Does the bible describe how Adam and Eve were to multiply? In Genesis 4:1 in the NKJV “Now Adam knew Eve his wife, and she conceived and bore Cain…”

• The New American Standard Bible translations puts it this way: “Now the man had relations with his wife Eve, and she conceived and gave birth to Cain…”

• Do you think that God had to explain to Adam and Eve what to do to conceive a child?

• The closest thing in the Bible to an explanation of the act of sex is in the Book of the Song of Solomon. Solomon describes a beautiful display of love and passion toward a man and a woman.

• The key to this book is that it speaks about love between a bride and groom. This physical expression of love is natural between a husband and wife.

• Don’t believe it if someone tells you that you need to know everything about sex before you are married. God made man and woman with natural passion and desires. There will be a strong physical desire of intimacy with the one you marry. You won’t need a how-to manual for sex.

• As for curiosity, it’s natural.

Be Very Clear on This Point…

• Sex does not only mean intercourse. Sex is the a activity that arouses the desire for more sexual activity with the completion or end being intercourse.

• It is important to understand that God made the human body, both male and female to find pleasure in the total sexual involvement, not only intercourse.

So How Far Is Too Far?

• You may not understand the intensity of sexual pressure now, but it will increase as you get older.

• When you graduate from high school, leave home or begin a steady relationship, the advise that people have been giving you will become more practical.

• Any physical contact can begin the arousal of sexual feelings. This is the way your body is suppose to work.

• Holding hands might be all you do now. But physical sexual activity is progressive.

• If you start the motor running it is not meant to shut off!

• You may be saying, “ I understand that sex is to culminate with intercourse, but I can stop anytime.”

• That may be true, but abstinence from intercourse is not the only goal!

• Unfortunately, many young people go “too far” without “going all the way.” That is, they engage in sexual physical activity but do not have intercourse.

• You may say this type of activity is all right as long as you don’t “go all the way.”

Scott Talley writes,• …They (teenagers) pride themselves on having

refrained from intercourse. Sexual experience is gained, but virginity is preserved. This type of activity is so widespread that a new term has been coined by psychologists and counselors to describe the teens in this category as “technical virgins”… Biblically speaking, they are observing the letter of the law but not its spirit. Since the Bible forbids only sexual intercourse anything but intercourse is considered fair game (in the teen’s mind).

• Being a Christian means more than observing only the letter of the law. The Bible teaches us to live by spirit and principal.

• Consider the following scriptures in relation to the principle of purity.

• “For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you should abstain from sexual immorality; that each of you should know how to possess his own vessel (body) in sanctification and honor, not in passion of lust, like the Gentiles who do not know God… For God did not call us to uncleanness, but in holiness.”

- 1 Thessalonians 4: 3-7

• “But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will

not carry out the desire of the flesh. For the flesh sets its desire against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; for these are in opposition to one another, so that you may not do the things that you please. But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the Law. Now the deeds of the flesh are evident, which are: immorality, impurity, sensuality….”

- Galatians 5:16 - 19

Hardening your heart…

• Moral purity means more than just abstaining from intercourse. Furthermore, if you allow yourself to violate your conscience, even a little, you will be more likely to violate it again, a little more. It becomes easier to allow yourself to “go a little further” each time you give in to sexual pressure.

• Remember also that if your body is feeling the sexual arousal that can lead to further activity, you know that the person you are with is experiencing similar if not stronger feelings.

• To defraud someone means to arouse sexual desires in another which cannot be righteously satisfied.

• “…no one should take advantage of and defraud his brother in this matter, because the Lord is the avenger of all such, as we also forewarned you and testified.”

- 1 Thessalonians 4:6

• If you truly care about the person you are with, you will value and respect him/her. When you are in a relationship and desire sexual activity to fulfill your own desires, you are acting out of selfishness.

“Selfish use of others for personal gratification violates the basic message of Christianity.” - Scott Talley

Why did God give us such a strong sex drive when we are not able to fulfill it and if sex is so great and our bodies are

ready, why do so many people say it is wrong?

• The temptations you face today will still be with you as an adult. Learning self-control during this difficult time will help you face the same temptations as an adult. Furthermore, a relationship with another person is built on more than just sex. Relationships are built mainly on love, commitment and respect for the other person. It is normal to have sexual feelings at your age, but there are physical and emotional consequences to sexual behavior.

• Although some temptations seem more difficult during puberty, adults also deal with similar temptations but are often better able to handle their feelings. Why?

• However, we can look around us and see example after example of adults who have not learned self-control and have ruined their families, careers and lives.

“…The passing pleasures of Sin…” Hebrews 11:25

• Quoting scripture may not be enough for you. There are many reasons, other than the commandment for purity, that make a good vase for abstinence.

• God did not give us restrictions and boundaries to keep us from having fun in life. On the contrary. Obeying God and His commandments while having a personal relationship with Him is fulfilling.

• Many things you would like to experience often bring pleasure only for a moment, with the consequences lasting a lifetime. (Hebrews 11:25)

• “As boys and girls, your physical and

emotional natures are different. Boys tend to respond in a much more physically demanding way than do girls. Girls tend to respond more to the emotional needs of security and closeness. Boys face a more physical want for sex, whereas girls face a more emotional desire for closeness and intimacy.”

-Dr. James Dobson

• With this difference in mind, imagine what can take place between two young people who have such strong feeling for each other. Sexual intimacy during the teen years ultimately results in broken hearts and strong feelings of depression and loss. Dr. Dobson describes the “connection” between two people sexually active as being traumatic.

• “You see, the sexual relationship bonds two people physically and emotionally. Breaking up when you’ve shared your body and soul with someone is profound and traumatic… sex connects our minds and bodies in a way that, once connected, they can never be separated again.”

Why Wait by Josh McDowell

1. Purity protects from unplanned pregnancy and provides a healthy atmosphere for child-rearing.

2. Purity protects from sexually transmitted diseases and provides for peace of mind.

3. Purity protects from sexual insecurity and provides for truth.

4. Purity protects from emotional distress and provides for true intimacy.

How to Wait by Josh McDowell

1. Set standards beforehand and share these standards with your dates.

2. Be accountable to your parents or to another person regarding your dating behavior.

3. Let your lifestyle show through conversation, body language and clothes.

4. Know yourself and be your own person.5. Choose companions carefully; hang around people

with the same values.6. Seek others’ wisdom; get counsel or advise when

you are involved in a friendship.

The Gift• Imagine finding just the right person and

being totally and completely in love with that person.

• What would be the most precious gift you could give that special person? A gift more precious than anything money could buy.

• Imagine a present beautifully wrapped.

You don’t know what is inside but it looks so beautiful and those who have seen it tell you it is wonderful. Your curiosity is so great, all you want to do is “peek” inside. The card has your name on it but you are not to open it until the right time. If you were only to take only a little peek inside the package, you would spoil the surprise – not to mention the wonderful anticipation that comes with waiting to open the gift.

Sex is like that package

• Even the anticipation of enjoying it on your honeymoon is exciting.

• Don’t spoil the surprise given by God by peeking inside before its time. Experiencing that special intimacy with the one you marry is worth waiting for!

Homework• Read pages 343 to 354

• Answer Explain questions 1 – 15

• Daily Prayer Journal entries for Wednesday through Monday.

• Finish reading I Kissed Dating Good Bye

• Next week we prepare for the debate that will be held on April 11th.