Twelve Layer Editing

Ms. Vette

You will need:

•12 different colors

•Your rough draft

•A legend on your paper

Step 1: HEADING AND TITLE

• Color:

• Does your heading follow MLA format (left side of your

paper)?

*Your name

*My name (Ms. Vette)

*Course (Honors 9 English, Block 4)

*Date (20 March 2014)

• Highlight the title. Is this interesting and relevant to

your topic?

• This should NOT be titled “Definition Essay”

Step 2: HOOK AND THESIS

STATEMENT•Color:

•Circle the hook or attention-getter in the

introductory paragraph.oWill this grab the reader’s attention? Is this general?

Does this make sense?

oMake sure this is not the dictionary definition of your

word.

•Underline the thesis statement. Is this specific?

Is this arguable? Does this answer ‘so what’?

Step 3: EXTENDED DEFINITION

•Color:

•Label the definition that is the focus of the essay.oIs it clear? Is this unique? Is this personal? Is this an

extended definition?

Step 4: NO EXCUSES WORDS•Color:

•Highlight all NO EXCUSES WORDS even if

they are correct. This is for you to be mindful

of using them correctly.

•their, there, they’re, too, two, to ,its, it’s,

cause vs. because, a lot, things and stuff,

have vs. of, loose, lose, than, then, your,

you’re, affect, effect and the every lazy and

annoying, general use of the pronoun YOU!!

Step 5: APOSTROPHES

•Color:

•Circle ALL APOSTROPHES (possessive

and contraction).

-possessive example: That is John’s ball

-contraction example: He isn’t going with us.

Step 6: COMMAS•Color:

•Circle where you have utilized commas. Reflect on the

effectiveness of these sentences. Be sure that you have

avoided comma splices.

•Underline any coordinating conjunctions that you have used

with commas.

FANBOYS : For-And-Nor-But-Or-Yet-So.

Example time-

•  We picked them up early, but they still missed their plane.

• I hadn't seen my nieces and nephews for ages, so I went overboard on

buying them Christmas gifts.

•  Do you want to stay behind, or will you come with us?

Step 7: COLON/SEMICOLON

USAGE

•Color:

•Underline at least ONE place where you have correctly used a semicolon or colon. If you have not used either of these, indicate one place where you will place one correctly.

Step 8: SENTENCE STARTERS

•Color:

•Look over the beginning words of all your

sentences, circle similar beginnings and

connect.

•Do the same for paragraphs

•Make sure that you aren’t repetitive in your

writing.

•Did you include transitions?

STEP 9:TRANSITIONS

Transitions are the words and phrases used to move from one idea to the next. They help words to flow more smoothly and to show readers how ideas relate to one another.

Transitional words and phrases connect ideas within sentences and between sentences, within paragraphs and between paragraphs. They are essential to good writing. They serve as a bridge between ideas.

What are Transitions?

Transition Words: Purposes

Transitions are used for a multitude of reasons: They show relationship between the main

ideas of your sentences within paragraphs, or your paragraphs within a body of writing.

They give the reader a “map” to help him/her move from idea to idea.

They smoothly shift the reader from idea to idea.

Think of a manual car. If you miss the clutch when you shift, what

happens to your car? How does the passenger feel?

Step 9: TRANSITIONS

•Color:• Identify three places in your investigative report where

you have effectively used transitions for the following

purposes: To smoothly shift ideas The use of signifier words to show relationships

between ideas To map where you want to take your audience

•If you did not use transitions, indicate three

places where you will include these effectively

Step 10: EVIDENCE• Color:

• Label evidence that is included to support the thesis. The definition essay

should include quotes/details from the following four sources:

• Two outside sources

• Personal examples

• Label each type of evidence.

• Does each piece of evidence have an appropriate lead-in? Is it introduced

effectively?

• Did you correctly cite each piece of evidence within your paper (either

through parenthetical citations or introducing each source in sentence

form)?

Step 11: ANALYSIS

•Color:

•What can one make of your evidence? Do you

effectively and thoroughly explain how/why your

evidence supports the definition.

•How/why is this evidence significant?

•What was uncovered or revealed based on your

evidence?

Step 12: CONCLUSION

•Color:

•Identify this. What should your reader walk away knowing? Lingering thought?

Peer Edit

•Now that you have edited your own paper with

the TWELVE layers, switch papers with a

partner.

•Look over your partner’s paper with the rubric

provided. Write down three things that he/she

did well and three suggestions for him/her to

improve the paper.