Achievement Standard AS91101Were I in Your Shoes: Writing Portfolio Empathic Task

Subject Reference English 2.4

Title Produce a selection of crafted and controlled writing

Level 2 Credits 6 Assessment Internal

This achievement standard involves producing a selection of crafted and controlled writing.

Achievement Criteria

Achievement Achievement with Merit Achievement with Excellence

Produce a selection of crafted and controlled writing which develops, sustains, and structures ideas.

Produce a selection of crafted and controlled writing which develops, sustains, and structures ideas convincingly.

Produce a selection of crafted and controlled writing which develops, sustains, and structures ideas effectively.

Produce a selection of crafted and controlled writing using language features appropriate to audience and purpose to create effects.

Produce a selection of crafted and controlled writing using language features appropriate to audience and purpose to create convincing effects.

Produce a selection of crafted and controlled writing using language features appropriate to audience and purpose to command attention.

Produce a selection of crafted and controlled writing which develops, sustains, and structures ideasconvincingly involves ideas and structure that are reasoned, clear, and relevant to the purpose of the text.

Produce a selection of crafted and controlled writing which develops, sustains, and structures ideaseffectively involves ideas and structure that are compelling, persuasive, innovative, and/or striking.

Produce a selection of crafted and controlled writingusing language features appropriate to audience and purpose to create effects involves: the deliberate use of language features appropriate to the selected text type to create meaning and effects; and accurate use of text conventions so that the writing contains only minor errors.

Produce a selection of crafted and controlled writingusing language features appropriate to audience and purpose to create convincing effectsinvolves: the deliberate use of language features appropriate to the selected text type to create meaning, effects and audience interest.

Produce a selection of crafted and controlled writingusing language features appropriate to audience and purpose to command attention involves: the sustained and inventive or articulate use of language features, distinctive personal voice, dimensions or viewpoints to create meaning, effects, and audience engagement.

STUDENT INSTRUCTIONSIn this activity you will write either a diary entry or a personal letter from the perspective of a soldier fighting in the First World War. Using the war poetry you have studied in class as base material, you will develop and craft a piece of writing that demonstrates your understanding of the soldiers’ experiences, including their hopes, their fears, their motivations and their relationships with their families, comrades and enemies. You will need to emulate the appropriate language and vocabulary of an early Twentieth Century soldier, and use the appropriate conventions of diary and letter writing.

You will be assessed on: how well you develop you ideas your ability to use a writing style that is appropriate to the task how well you structure your writing your accuracy in spelling, punctuation and grammar

You will work on this piece in class to a completed draft stage and then file it in your Writing Portfolio with all relevant research material. This portfolio must be not taken home. At the end of the year you will choose your best two drafts to complete to a published format.You will have four periods to edit and publish your final piece of writing. All writing will be done in class though you may have an opportunity to publish the final draft of your work using a word processor at home. You are strongly advised to prepare research material on the physical conditions of the First World War and the styles of language used by contemporary soldiers, but this must be done in your own time. You must hand in this material with your final piece in order to prove you have not copied from it directly.

TASK 1: Preparation and Planning

1. Read, annotate and analyse a selection of poetry from the time of the First World War. Consider also the war experience seen in the viewing of the film ‘All Quiet On The Western Front’. Make note of how the poets depict the realities of war and their emotional and physical reactions to what they have experienced. How does the reality of war compare to their initial expectations? Do the poets wish to encourage young soldiers to wage war, or warn them of its horrors?

2. What were conditions like in the trenches? How did the mood of combatant nations differ from 1914 (the beginning of the war) to 1916 (the middle) and 1918 (the end)? What aspects of everyday life in the trenches would young soldiers be likely to focus on? Think of sights, sounds, smells and physical sensations.Research key dates and battlefields of the First World War and write a brief, half-page report on your findings. Helpful sources regarding life in the trenches and language idioms of the day include www.firstworldwar.com and the BBC comedy series, Blackadder Goes Forth.

3. Read the two attached exemplars of student work. Each is a piece written by a Year 12 student. Annotate each piece, paying attention to:

a. The structure and style of the piece. Is it formal or relaxed? Does each paragraph build upon the last and develop ideas? Is personal information included? Does the writing seem authentic?

b. What details has the writer included, both about life in the trenches and life ‘back home’? What effect does including these details have on the piece’s sense of authenticity?

TASK 2: Drafting and Crafting

1. Draft your letter or diary entry. Ensure that letters include dates, salutations (e.g. Dear ______) and subscriptions (e.g. Yours lovingly, _______). Diary entries should also include dates. If your piece is a letter, ensure that it is clearly focused toward an intended recipient and adjust your language accordingly. Diaries should take care to use personal language appropriate to the time of 1914-1918.

2. When your draft is complete, exchange it with a partner and check each other’s work for spelling and grammatical correctness. Give constructive feedback regarding the authenticity of the work. Does the piece feel like it was written by a soldier in the First World War, or a teenager in the early Twenty First Century? Compare your partner’s work to the Achievement Standard marking schedule and assign it the grade you think it deserves, explaining in detail why you think it deserves that grade.

3. When your work has been assigned the grade, adjust and rework it in response to the feedback you have received. Proofread and edit again for soundness in spelling, punctuation, structure and style.