by connie chapman - conniechapman.com

WEEK ONE: TRANSFORMING FEAR

WEEK ONE: SHINING THE SPOTLIGHT

“Fear is a natural reaction to moving closer to the truth”

Pema Chödrön

The way that this project is designed is that the toughest work is at the start. It is time to get deep and dirty and dive in to the nitty gritty of what is really going on.

The purpose of this work is keep creating more and more self-awareness. You want to get really aware of how fear is running the show in your life and where your limiting beliefs are playing out.

Many of us like to avoid looking at ourselves this honestly. It is it much easier to suppress things or hide from them. But until we look at it we cannot change it.

Many of us also make our fear ‘wrong’ and try to run away from it, as though it is some dark part of ourselves that we should be ashamed of.

But I am going to encourage you to look at it head on – square in the face.

As you start this process, things may get uncomfortable, but that is ok, just breathe through it.

Do not beat up on yourself. Do not be hard on yourself. Just notice what is going on in your mind without attachment.

Fear will play out as self-doubt. It will play out through negative thinking. It plays out when we tear other people down.

You are not your fear.

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YOUR PRACTICES FOR THIS WEEK

1 WorksheetsComplete the following 3 worksheets• Witnessing Your Fear • How is Fear Driving You?• Choose LoveTake your time to work through these worksheets. There is a lot here! Do not rush these. You can spread this work over the course of the whole week if you need to.

2 Practice Use the Sit With Your Feelings exercise (at the end of this workbook) whenever strong emotion arises.

3 Meditate Continue with your daily meditation practice Take a minimum of 5 minutes each day to sit in stillness and breathe and slow your mind.

4 Affirm “I am not my fear. I choose love”

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WORKSHEET 1 : WITNESSING YOUR FEAR

Look over the Creating Self Awareness section of your pre-work workbook. What were some of the main fearful thoughts you noticed yourself thinking?

What happens in your body when you think these thoughts? How does it make you feel? Where in your body does it sit? Does it have a colour, shape,

size or texture. Start to really connect and become familiar with this fear.

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What are the triggers that cause these fearful thoughts to start playing in your mind? What typically starts the pattern?

What are the stories you have created around these thoughts eg: If you feel you are not good enough, what have you made this mean you cannot do in

your life?

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WORKSHEET 2: HOW IS FEAR DRIVING YOU?

How do your fears drive your actions, behaviour and decisions?

Where in your life do you project these fears on to others?

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How are these fears holding you back and keeping you small?

If these fears were actually serving the purpose of keeping you safe, what would they be keeping you safe from? How are these fears protecting you?

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WORKSHEET 3 : CHOOSE LOVE

FEAR

Eg: I can’t do itEg: I am not good enough

LOVE

Eg; I have everything I need to succeed at thisEg: I am perfect, whole and complete just as I am

Now, take a moment to look over what you have written. Notice your fears and how they play out for you. Then, ponder the following question – Why do I choose to think thoughts of fear, over thoughts of love?Many of us have developed a stronger faith in fear than we have in love. It is time to make a new choice. It is time to choose love.On the left side, list all of your fears. On the right side list the loving perspective.

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EXERCISE: SIT WITH YOUR FEELINGS

1 Stop what you are doing and take a moment to sit still and closeyour eyes (when I used to work in a day job, I would actually go in to the bathroom and lock myself in there for 5 minutes so I could practice this)

2 Tune in to your body and notice the physical sensations that theemotion is creating. Where is it sitting in your body?

3 Focus in on it even more, and start to really allow yourself to feelthe feeling

4 Then, accept the feeling. Open up to it. Begin to welcome it in andcreate even more space for it to be expressed. Keep tuning in to it and feeling it.

5 Try not to analyse or think about the feeling. But rather, stay in yourbody and stay with the sensations you are experiencing. If your mind wanders, keep brining it back to the feeling.

6 Surrender to the energy that is welling up inside of you and allowit to be expressed. Sometimes you may just feel the energy shift and move in to a different sensation, or other times you will have the desire to express the emotion in some way. If you feel that way, allow it to come out.

7 Continue sitting with that feeling and do not go an do anything elseuntil you have felt it transform or disappear.

How often to push down your emotions or try to run from them in an attempt to not have to feel them? What is your typical response when you feel something – is to grab something to eat, to turn the tv on to distract yourself, or to keep yourself busy so you don’t have to feel? If you do any of these, I want you to start to connect with and feel your emotions. This process will be uncomfortable. But is the only way to process and release what you are feeling. If you don’t allow the energy inside of you to be expressed in some way, it will remain bottled up inside of you and will eventually be triggered in an un-resourceful way.So, next time you feel the discomfort of an unpleasant emotion, I want you to practice the following.

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