welcome to staff/pastor parish relations committee training beyond conflict
TRANSCRIPT
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Welcome to Staff/Pastor Parish
Relations Committee Training
Beyond Conflict
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Roadmap:
Roles and Responsibilities
Short Break
Beyond Conflict
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Philippians 2:1-8 CEB
Therefore, if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort in love, any sharing in the Spirit, any sympathy,
complete my joy by thinking the same way, having the same love, being united, and agreeing with each other.
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Philippians 2:1-8 CEB
Don’t do anything for selfish purposes, but with humility think of others as better than yourselves. Instead of each person watching out for their own good, watch out for what is better for others.
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Philippians 2:1-8 CEB
Adopt the attitude that was in Christ Jesus:
Though he was in the form of God, he did not consider being equal with God something to exploit.
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Philippians 2:1-8 CEB
But he emptied himself by taking the form of a slave and by becoming like human beings. When he found himself in the form of a human, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.
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Role
What is the role of the S/PPRC?
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Role
What is not the role of the S/PPRC?
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rmevaluate
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coercemanipulate
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govern
direct
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Expectations
“People serving on this committee must be engaged in and attentive to their Christian spiritual development so as to give proper leadership in the responsibilities with which the committee is entrusted.”
(BOD ¶ 258.2)
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Expectations
Committee Makeup
5-9 people plus Lay Leader & Lay Member
Young adult/ Youth
No staff member/ no staff family member
Only one per household
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Expectations
Terms
Three classes, three years each
Maximum of six years (two rotations)
Exceptions may be Lay Leader/Lay Member
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Expectations
Meetings
At least quarterly
First 6 months to 1 year- monthly
Ideal- every other month
Pastor shall be present
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Expectations
Confidentiality
“The committee shall meet in closed session, and information shared in the committee shall be confidential.”
(BOD ¶ 258.2)
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Appointive Process
November: Request for change of appointment
November: Profiles for pastor and congregation
January: Cabinet retreat
January--June: Introductions
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Appointive Process: S/PPRC RoleInterpretive
Confidential
Consultative
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Practical Matters
Vacation
Continuing Education
Connectional Responsibilities
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Practical Matters
Employment Policies
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Practical Matters
Evaluations
Do Your Best
Yearly
Goal is Growth
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Q & A Time
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Church Conflict “If we could take the energy of church
critics and antagonists into reaching people with the gospel, our churches would become evangelistic forces. Unfortunately in many churches, members expend most of their energies criticizing leadership and others, and fighting over trivial issues.”
–Thom Rainer
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Conflict
Inevitable
Resolve it?
Manage it?
Allow it to manage us?
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Correct
Teach & Communicate
Listen & Learn about the
person’s world
Build the relationship
Get out of the box/Be outward focused
Helping things go
right (Supporting the person)
Dealing with things that are going wrong
(Challenging the person)
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Correct !!!
Teach & Communicate
Listen & Learn about the person’s world
Build the relationship
Get out of the box/Be outward focused
Helping things go right
(Supporting the person)
Dealing with things that are going
wrong(Challenging the person)
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Correct
Teach & Communicate
Listen & Learn about the
person’s world
Build the relationship
Get out of the box/Be outward focused
Helping things go
right (Supporting the person)
Dealing with things that are going wrong
(Challenging the person)
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The Escalating Stages of Church
Conflict 1. (Sometimes) An uncomfortable feeling
2. A problem emerges
3. A person to differ with
4. A dispute to win
5. A person to verbally attack
6. My “face” to save
7. A person to expel, withdraw from, or ruin
8. The aftermath
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How to deal with conflict
Honesty
Trust
Give Good Feedback
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How to deal with conflict
Negotiate Expectations
Name them
Dialogue
Set Priorities
Be supportive
Be realistic
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How to deal with conflict
Communicate
No Comparison
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What if conflict has reached a crisis stage?When is it time to bring in
outside help?
When is it time to bring in the DS/ Asst DS?
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Healthy vs. Happy
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Q & A Time