writing bad-news messages i. introduction. bad news bears or

WRITING BAD-NEWS MESSAGES

I. Introduction

Bad News Bears

Or

Bearers of Bad News?

At some point we all have to give someone bad news: As teens, telling our parents we smacked

up the family car. Telling our spouse why our stock portfolio

is worth 10 % of what it was last week. Telling a customer the warranty doesn’t

cover dropping the TV set on the sidewalk.


II. Explanation

Types of RoutineBad-News Messages

• Refusing information

• Refusing invitations and other requests

• Giving bad news about orders

• Refusing claims and requests for adjustments

Claims

Goals forBad-News Messages

When delivering bad news, you have three main goals:

1. Help audience understand your bad news message represents a firm decision.

2. Help audience understand that under the circumstances your decision was fair and reasonable.

3. Help audience remain well-disposed towards your business and, possibly, towards you.

Objectives1. Choose best approach

• Indirect, or direct

2. Establish rapport with customer• Acknowledge concern or problem

3. Provide explanation of what went wrong and why

4. Deliver the bad news

5. Offer an alternative if appropriate

6. Close on a positive note helping the reader to understand that the decision is firm and fair – and still build goodwill

Select Approach

1. Direct – Gets right to the heart of the matter.

2. Indirect – Sets the stage, establishes rapport with the reader and smoothes the way.

Each is appropriate in certain circumstances.

Weigh the Indirect Indirect to DirectDirect Approaches

Use of the DirectDirect Approach• For internal memos• For routine bad-

news to other businesses

• For audiences who prefer direct news

• For situations that demand firmness

• For minor negatives• For close friends

and associates• For shorter message

Using the Direct Approach• The key is to analyze your reader first.

• Decide if the reader would like the bad news right away or needs to be eased into it.

• If you know your audience can handle bad news first, use the direct approach.

• The direct approach starts with a clear statement of bad news then proceeds to reasons.

Indirect Approach

• If the audience/reader will not readily accept the bad news.

• If you feel the need to ease into the main message tactfully.

The indirect approach is the one to use if you’re uncertain about your audience’s reaction; it’s the most common approach.

Five Elements of a Bad News Message

1. Buffer Statement

2. Reasons for Refusing

3. Refusal

4. Alternative, if Possible

5. Positive Close Using Helpful Tone

Some Approaches for the Buffer

• Agreement • Appreciation• Co-operation• Good News• Understanding• Fairness


III. Explanations with Examples

Buffer Basics

• Avoid saying no• Don’t build up false hopes• Don’t apologize• Make it relevant• Stick to the point• Be concise

Buffer Example

Ms. Garbriella Marconi120 Carlisle StreetHanover, SK S7K 3T6 Dear Ms. Marconi: We can certainly understand your concern

regarding your Lentax teleconverter lens. We know how important such equipment is to a professional photographer.

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Evaluating Buffer StatementsEvaluating Buffer Statements

How effective is the following opening for a letter that refuses to grant credit?

The recent resurgence of interest in the stock market caught many of us by surprise.

(Is not relevant)

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How effective is the following opening for a letter that refuses to grant credit?

We are delighted to receive your application for credit.

(Gives wrong impression)

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How effective is the following opening for a letter that refuses a request for a donation?

Your request for a monetary contribution has been referred to me for reply.

(Fails to engage reader)

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How effective is the following opening for a letter that refuses a request for a donation?

We appreciate the fine work your organization is doing to provide early childhood programs that meet the needs of parents and very young children.(Compliments reader but doesn’t imply approval)

Reasons for Refusal- the Basics

1. Begin with most positive to negative

2. Don’t hide behind company policy

3. Devote most of letter to reasons

4. Use positive/nonjudgmental tone

5. Don’t apologize . . . except

Reasons Example

Our service department has carefully examined your lens and has concluded that it was either dropped or attached to another lens in such a way as to cause a lack of synchronization.

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Presenting the ReasonsPresenting the Reasons

Be cautious in explaining.

Cite reader benefits, if possible.

Explain company policy, if relevant.

Choose positive words.

Show that the matter was treated seriously and fairly.

Stating the Refusal

• Make answer clear but positive• Place bad-news in middle of paragraph• Minimize space saying it• Use “if” or “when” to suggest conditions

for future good-news• Don’t be blunt • Offer alternative, if possible

Characteristics of Good Refusal Messages

Provide sufficient detail to make reader accept the message

Provide sufficient detail to make reader accept the message

Imply the reader is better offImply the reader is better off

Explain company policy as being logicalExplain company policy as being logical

Offer no apologyOffer no apology

Avoid personal assaultsAvoid personal assaults

Refusal + Alternative Example

• Our limited five‑year warranty covers only manufacturer's defects.

• However, since you purchased your lens from an authorized dealer, we can offer you a 25‑percent discount on repairs. Our repairs are made with great care and are, of course, guaranteed.

Bad-News Closings

• Don’t repeat bad-news• Conclude on positive note• Provide possible solution • Provide resale and/or sales promotion• Don’t leave area open for further

discussion• Watch doubtful/hopeful/insincere tone

Closing Example

Enclosed is our 1998 Lentax catalogue, which focuses primarily on products geared toward the freelance photographer. Any purchases made before April 30 will be discounted by 10 percent.

Please call me at (204) 555‑5555 so that I can make arrangements for the repairs to your lens at our special 25‑percent discount. Yours truly,

Ending Bad-News Message

Keep it positive. Limit future correspondence on

the matter. Be optimistic about the future and

don’t anticipate problems. Be sincere. Be confident.

Refusing Claims and Requests for Adjustments

• Avoid language that would have a negative impact on the reader.

• Avoid abusive, defaming language.• Keep your personal opinions to yourself.• Provide accurate information; stick to facts.• Don’t send messages out of anger or malice.• Consult your company’s legal department• Communicate honestly.

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Techniques for De-emphasizing Bad News


Avoid the spotlight. Put the bad news in the middle of a paragraph halfway through the message.

Use a long sentence. Don’t put the bad news in a short, simple sentence.

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Place the bad news in a subordinate clause.

Although we have no position for an individual with your qualifications at this time, we are pleased that you thought of us when you started your job search.

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Use the passive voice.

Instead of this:

We cannot make a contribution at this time.

Try this:

A contribution cannot be made at this time.

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Be clear but not overly graphic.

Instead of this:

Our investigation reveals that you owe three creditors large sums and that you were fired from your last job.

Try this:

Our investigation reveals that your employment status and your financial position are unstable at this time.

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Imply the refusal.

Instead of this:

We cannot contribute to your charity this year.

Try this:

Although all our profits must be reinvested in our company this year, we hope to be able to support your future fund-raising activities.

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Suggest an alternative.

Although the product ordered cannot be sold at the incorrectly listed price of $18, we can allow you to purchase this $218 item for only $118.

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Using the Passive VoiceUsing the Passive Voice

Passive-voice verbs focus attention on actions rather than on personalities. They are useful in being tactful.

Active voice:

I cannot allow you to return the VCR because . . . .

Passive voice:

Return of the VCR is not allowed because . . . .

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Passive-voice verbs focus attention on actions rather than on personalities. They are useful in being tactful.

Active voice:

Ryan checked the report, but he missed the error.

Passive voice:

The report was checked, but the error was missed.

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Notice that passive-voice verb phrases always include “helper” verbs.

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Try Your SkillTry Your Skill

Convert the following statement from active to passive voice. I am unable to make a cash contribution this year

because of unusually high taxes.

A cash contribution cannot be made this year because of unusually high taxes.

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Convert the following statement from active to passive voice. We cannot process your application this month.

Your application cannot be processed this month.

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Convert the following statement from active to passive voice. I have examined your employment record and found

that you have little cost accounting experience.

Examination of your employment record has revealed that you have little cost accounting experience.

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Convert the following statement from active to passive voice. Mark made a programming error that delayed our

project.

A programming error was made that delayed our project.

And Now For Some Examples

Memo to Mark

• Announces the bad news too quickly and painfully.

• Gives reasons, but includes a potentially dangerous statement about the shaky system.

• Overemphasizes the refusal and apology.

• “We can’t allow you to attend the conference in September, Mark. Perhaps you didn't know that budget-planning meetings are scheduled for that month.”

• “Your expertise is needed here to help keep our telecommunications network on schedule. Without you, the entire system-which is shaky at best-might fall apart. I’m sorry to have to refuse your request to attend the conference. I know this is small thanks for the fine work you have done for us. Please accept my apologies.”

More Mark• Compliments can

helpbuffer the impact of re-quest refusals.

• “In the spring I’m sure your work schedule will be lighter, and we can releaseyou to attend a conference at any time.”

Revised Memo to Mark

To: Mark Stevens, Manager, Telecommunications

From: Ann Wells Freed, VP Management Informations Systems

Subject: Request to attend September Conference

Memo to Mark - Revised

• “The Management Council and I are extremely pleased with the leadership you have shown in setting up live video transmission to our regional offices. Because of your genuine professional commitment, Mark, I can understand your desire to attend the Telecommunications Specialists’ conference in Kelowna in September.”

• Buffer includes sincere praise.

• Transition uses date to move smoothly from Buffer to reasons.

Mark cont’d• “The last two weeks in

September have been set aside for budget planning. As you and I know, we’ve only scratched the surface of our teleconferencing projects for the next five years. Since you are the specialist and we rely heavily on your expertise, we need you here for those planning sessions.”

• Transition uses date to move smoothly from Buffer to reasons.

• Bad news implies refusal.

• Reasons: tells why refusal is necessary

Mark – last paragraph

• “If you’re able to attend a similar conference in the spring and if our workloads permit, we’ll try to send you then. You’re a valuable player, Mark, and I’m grateful you’re on our MIS team.”

• Closing: contains realistic alternative, praise and appreciation.

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Writing Plan for Refusing Requests or Claims


Buffer Start with a neutral statement on which both

reader and writer can agree, such as a compliment, an expression of appreciation, a quick review of the facts, or an apology.

Transition Try to include a key idea or word that acts as a

transition to the explanation.

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Reasons Present valid reasons for the refusal, avoiding words

that create a negative tone. Include resale or sales promotion, if appropriate.

Bad News Soften the blow by positioning the bad news

strategically, using the passive voice, accentuating the positive, or implying a refusal.

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Alternative Suggest a compromise or substitute, if

possible.

Closing Renew good feelings with a positive

statement. Look forward to continued business. Avoid referring to the bad news.

Fill in the Blanks

See handout

Buffer ExerciseYour company sells auto tires, and you have just

received a letter from a Miss Stella Dunbar, who claims that one of her tires needs to be replaced. Your firm guarantees these tires against defective workmanship for 65,000 km. Miss Dunbar’s tire has 30,000 km on it. In her letter, Miss Dunbar has given you the name of the service station where she took the tire to be replaced. A phone call to this person reveals that the tire wore down because it was improperly inflated. “She just didn’t keep enough pressure in the left front tire,” the garage mechanic tells you.

Write the Buffer

Buffer

Miss Stella Dunbar3251 Portage AvenueWinnipeg, MB R3G 2N3Dear Miss Dunbar:SUBJECT: YOUR LETTER OF FEBRUARY 25

We understand your concern regarding your Dupond X2 radial tire that has only 30,000 km on it. Our tires are guaranteed against defective workmanship for up to 65,000 km because we know they are sturdy, well‑constructed tires that will live up to the promises we make.

Reasons Exercise

You have had a new tuxedo returned to your store for full credit. Upon investigation you find the coat has a small burn in the back that cannot be fixed without rendering the garment used. Since it is our policy to allow returns only on garments that can be sold as new, you must deny the request (i.e., full credit). Write the reasons for denying his request.

Reasons

Our policy allows us to accept for full credit only those garments that can be sold as new. Upon examination of your tuxedo when we received it this morning, we discovered a small hole in the back of the jacket. We must assume that this garment has been worn and will have to be repaired. Under these circumstances, we cannot resell the garment. Although a full refund cannot be made, we can offer you a 30 percent discount on the necessary repair.

Close ExerciseAs a customer service representative, you

receive the following letter from a customer:Dear Rayco Watch Company:I’m sending back my Windsurfer V- 2watch. I

received this watch as a gift for my birthday June 3 and I’ve been wearing it surfing and scuba diving for the past two weeks. I love all its features, but now it’s not working. I thought this watch was supposed to be waterproof! My parents said it cost $96.20. Please refund this amount.

Sincerely,Jerry Golden

For activities such as diving, you would want one of our Sport Diver models. These precision time pieces are built to withstand the pressures of diving to a depth of 60 metres. Each is constructed with a scratch-resistant plastic crystal and a rugged resin case. You will find the Sport Diver line beginning on page 12 of the enclosed catalogue.Please let me know if you wish to take advantage of this discount offer and I will personally handle your order. My e-mail address is my direct phone number is 204.998.8899

writing bad-news messages i. introduction. bad news bears or

Documents

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help audience