100 questions -1.1.sub.english

7/21/2019 100 Questions -1.1.Sub.english

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100:00:00,732 --> 00:00:03,350Welcome to Soul Mate Specialists, Inc.Make yourself comfortable.

200:00:03,400 --> 00:00:05,287- Thank you.- But not on the couch.

300:00:06,817 --> 00:00:09,668As I said, I'm Andrew,your Soul Mate Specialist.

400:00:09,904 --> 00:00:13,204I'm Charlotte, your soul matesearcher, searching for...

500:00:13,254 --> 00:00:15,757Please hold your commentsuntil I'm done.

600:00:16,086 --> 00:00:17,023Sorry.

700:00:17,073 --> 00:00:19,969Let me start by sayingcongratulations, Miss Payne.

800:00:20,256 --> 00:00:24,906You're about to take the most comprehensive

personality test in the industry.

900:00:24,956 --> 00:00:26,747- Sounds fun.- Fun?

1000:00:26,797 --> 00:00:29,187You go to a carnival for fun.

1100:00:29,568 --> 00:00:31,731

I don't like carnivals.

1200:00:31,971 --> 00:00:35,182The point is, this is science,Miss Payne.

1300:00:35,232 --> 00:00:39,538100 scientifically formulated



questions answered face-to-face

1400:00:39,588 --> 00:00:42,130to ensure the clientis honest, thorough,

1500:00:42,180 --> 00:00:46,079and at least within 15 poundsof what they say they weigh.

1600:00:46,783 --> 00:00:49,655- You might just want to change...- I already did.

1700:00:49,705 --> 00:00:52,697Once you've answered these questions,we will know exactly who you are.

1800:00:52,747 --> 00:00:55,130

Then we can findyour soul mate.

1900:00:56,487 --> 00:00:59,209The thing is, I'm not sureI believe in soul mates.

2000:00:59,259 --> 00:01:00,289Why not?

21

00:01:00,339 --> 00:01:03,280Well, when your dad has fourex-soul mates and your mom has three,

2200:01:03,330 --> 00:01:05,974it does make you questionthe whole concept.

2300:01:06,513 --> 00:01:09,466If you don't believe in it,then why are you taking this test?

2400:01:09,516 --> 00:01:11,521'Cause I want to believe.

2500:01:11,925 --> 00:01:13,916Well, let's get started then.

26



00:01:13,966 --> 00:01:16,776Question #1:What brought you here?

2700:01:17,762 --> 00:01:20,939I guess it was a really bad date.

2800:01:20,989 --> 00:01:24,213It always is, girl.It always is.

2900:01:24,263 --> 00:01:28,281My friends and I went to a Yankeesgame with this guy I was dating...

3000:01:28,331 --> 00:01:29,497Rick.

3100:01:33,785 --> 00:01:36,117

Oh, my God.Look at the third baseman.

3200:01:36,167 --> 00:01:39,971I don't care if steroids shrunk his junk.I would totally sleep with him.

3300:01:41,520 --> 00:01:44,468And that makesthe entire infield.

3400:01:45,221 --> 00:01:47,764You know,you should take steroids.

3500:01:49,910 --> 00:01:51,127I'm a lawyer.

3600:01:51,177 --> 00:01:53,627Yeah, but you could bea super lawyer.

3700:01:56,030 --> 00:01:58,323You're a wonderful girl,Charlotte Payne.

3800:01:58,373 --> 00:01:59,637Thanks, Rick.



3900:02:00,507 --> 00:02:03,738I really enjoy spending timewith you and your friends.

4000:02:03,788 --> 00:02:05,508You guys are great.

4100:02:05,558 --> 00:02:07,697I feel like since I've starteddating Charlotte,

4200:02:07,747 --> 00:02:09,579you guys have becomemy friends.

4300:02:09,885 --> 00:02:11,417Like we're this...

44

00:02:11,467 --> 00:02:13,082big group of friends.

4500:02:15,932 --> 00:02:17,552- Great.- Yeah.

4600:02:18,757 --> 00:02:20,557That guy is not my friend.

47

00:02:21,716 --> 00:02:22,714Hey.

4800:02:25,714 --> 00:02:27,390You wearing space pants?

4900:02:27,440 --> 00:02:29,891... 'cause your assis out of this world.

50

00:02:30,957 --> 00:02:32,206Yeah.

5100:02:32,256 --> 00:02:33,728No.

5200:02:35,124 --> 00:02:38,110I think you're looking for

someone with lower standards.

5300:02:38,160 --> 00:02:40,485Hi, I'm Jill.

5400:02:41,769 --> 00:02:43,435Charlotte, I need to talk to you.

5500:02:43,485 --> 00:02:45,565Ladies and gentlemen,please remain seated

5600:02:45,615 --> 00:02:48,213as we have a very specialannouncement.

5700:02:49,145 --> 00:02:50,695Why are you standing?

5800:02:50,953 --> 00:02:52,953Why do you havea microphone?

5900:02:53,393 --> 00:02:55,343Why are weon the Jumbotron?

6000:02:56,209 --> 00:02:58,559Dude, we're totally on tv

right now.

6100:03:02,058 --> 00:03:04,208Can I have your attention, folks?

6200:03:04,317 --> 00:03:05,677Charlotte Payne,

6300:03:06,444 --> 00:03:09,797the last three months

have been the sweetest

6400:03:09,847 --> 00:03:11,298of my life.

6500:03:11,348 --> 00:03:13,059That is all because of you.

6600:03:16,639 --> 00:03:17,939Bro.

6700:03:23,803 --> 00:03:25,103Charlotte Payne.

6800:03:29,503 --> 00:03:30,727Will you marry me?

6900:03:37,351 --> 00:03:40,575Rick, I don't know what to say.

7000:03:44,716 --> 00:03:48,386I just don't feel that wayabout you.

7100:03:52,390 --> 00:03:54,767Oh, God, I'm so sorry.

7200:03:55,721 --> 00:03:57,762I hope we can still be friends...

7300:03:57,812 --> 00:04:00,982friends... friends... friends...

7400:04:02,049 --> 00:04:04,646We really shouldn't havecarpooled with them.

7500:04:06,350 --> 00:04:10,350.:: www.SubCentral.de presents ::.

7600:04:11,350 --> 00:04:15,350.:: 100 Questions S01E01 ::..:: What Brought You Here? ::.

7700:04:26,350 --> 00:04:30,350.:: Transcript: addic7ed.com ::.

.:: Timings: italiansubs.net ::.

7800:04:34,825 --> 00:04:39,025I can't believe it. People throwfood at us and we get thrown out.

7900:04:40,113 --> 00:04:41,729Is all the popcorn



out of my hair?

8000:04:41,779 --> 00:04:45,879You know, there's some hot dog in there too.You should really take a shower.

8100:04:46,423 --> 00:04:49,423Rick cried for 45 minutes straight.

8200:04:50,097 --> 00:04:52,697I timed it. It was 45 minutes.

8300:04:53,578 --> 00:04:55,029Was it really that bad?

8400:04:55,079 --> 00:04:57,329When you said you hopedyou could still be friends,

8500:04:57,379 --> 00:04:59,780my testicles actually hurt.

8600:05:01,203 --> 00:05:02,953Like, physically hurt.

8700:05:03,808 --> 00:05:05,788Why would he propose?

88

00:05:05,838 --> 00:05:07,422We've been datingfor three months.

8900:05:07,472 --> 00:05:10,244Why would someone proposeafter only three months?

9000:05:10,294 --> 00:05:12,355I'll bet it's the accent.

9100:05:12,405 --> 00:05:14,001It's not the accent.

9200:05:14,051 --> 00:05:16,539Then you must be wickedin the sack.

93



00:05:16,589 --> 00:05:18,739I am not wicked in the sack.

9400:05:19,105 --> 00:05:20,655That's disappointing.

9500:05:22,719 --> 00:05:24,744So what do I do? Do I call him?Do I go over there?

9600:05:24,794 --> 00:05:25,794No.

9700:05:28,589 --> 00:05:30,537You are not going over there.

9800:05:30,831 --> 00:05:32,512That is crazy.

9900:05:33,462 --> 00:05:37,631The last person Rick wantsto see is you. Think about it.

10000:05:38,851 --> 00:05:42,251Are there any other gesturesI can make with this finger?

10100:05:42,464 --> 00:05:45,064God, I regret buying you

that thing.

10200:05:46,089 --> 00:05:49,185"Meet me for a drinktomorrow at 5:00"?

10300:05:50,220 --> 00:05:52,170Who is this texting me?

10400:05:52,400 --> 00:05:54,600

It's the painted guyfrom the game.

10500:05:54,882 --> 00:05:57,890I slipped him your numberwhen security escorted us out.

10600:05:58,083 --> 00:05:59,064



When?

10700:05:59,114 --> 00:06:02,391Right before that tray ofnachos hit you in the face.

10800:06:02,441 --> 00:06:05,106Come on, Leslie.Just go on one date with him.

10900:06:05,156 --> 00:06:07,057No. It's too soon.

11000:06:07,216 --> 00:06:08,717It's been a year.

11100:06:08,907 --> 00:06:11,989- Jeffrey has moved on.- You can't be sure of that.

11200:06:12,039 --> 00:06:14,639We watched him get marriedthrough binoculars.

11300:06:15,900 --> 00:06:17,700Well, he didn't look happy.

11400:06:18,293 --> 00:06:20,378It'll be good for you

to get out and date again.

11500:06:20,428 --> 00:06:22,828For all of us, really.

11600:06:23,595 --> 00:06:27,071Fine. I'll go out withthe creepy painted guy.

11700:06:27,121 --> 00:06:28,344

Yay.

11800:06:28,992 --> 00:06:31,394But if I end up deadin a ditch, it's your fault.

11900:06:31,444 --> 00:06:32,792Yay.



12000:06:34,411 --> 00:06:35,784This is a bad idea.

12100:06:35,834 --> 00:06:38,505That guy had the worst pick-up lineI've ever heard in my life.

12200:06:38,555 --> 00:06:40,705The space pants? It was cute.

12300:06:41,480 --> 00:06:44,540I can come up with a better pick-upline than that off the top of my head.

12400:06:44,590 --> 00:06:46,194Okay, let's hear it.

125

00:06:46,678 --> 00:06:47,878Okay. Fine.

12600:06:49,647 --> 00:06:51,697What's a n...Hold on a second.

12700:06:54,498 --> 00:06:57,161Are you an... Are those win...Are you an angel?

12800:06:57,211 --> 00:06:58,211Appalling.

12900:06:59,683 --> 00:07:01,536I thought lawyerscould speak good.

13000:07:01,586 --> 00:07:02,422Oh, yeah?

13100:07:02,472 --> 00:07:05,376I thought kindergarten teachers weresupposed to be able to talk... to speak...

13200:07:05,426 --> 00:07:06,676Forget it.

133

00:07:07,726 --> 00:07:10,182There, I did it.I'm gonna meet him for a drink.

13400:07:10,232 --> 00:07:13,782Not a date. Just a drink.So everybody just calm down.

13500:07:17,935 --> 00:07:21,308Okay, I cannot just sit here.I'm going to call Rick.

13600:07:21,358 --> 00:07:23,742Yeah. I want to seeif he's still crying.

13700:07:23,792 --> 00:07:27,062Oh, God. He can't still be crying.

138

00:07:27,630 --> 00:07:29,930He's crying if he's watching this.

13900:07:31,536 --> 00:07:32,462What is it?

14000:07:32,512 --> 00:07:35,480It's a video of you breakinga grown man's heart.

141

00:07:35,530 --> 00:07:37,144It's all over the internet.

14200:07:37,194 --> 00:07:40,079And they're calling you the...

14300:07:40,627 --> 00:07:42,327Yankee Bitch.

14400:07:44,519 --> 00:07:46,310

I hope we can still be friends...

14500:07:46,360 --> 00:07:47,960Oh, there it is again.

14600:07:50,884 --> 00:07:53,111Forget it. I can't call Rick.



14700:07:53,161 --> 00:07:55,961I can never ever,ever face him again.

14800:07:57,740 --> 00:07:59,942The ring is still on my finger, isn't it?

14900:08:11,676 --> 00:08:13,045Everybody's staring at me.

15000:08:13,095 --> 00:08:15,016No, they're not.They're staring at me.

15100:08:16,262 --> 00:08:17,735And I like it.

15200:08:20,696 --> 00:08:22,796

No, wait, they are staring at you.

15300:08:23,193 --> 00:08:24,259Oh, hi. My name's Charl...

15400:08:24,309 --> 00:08:27,282Mr. Preston, the Yankee Bitchis here to see you.

15500:08:30,699 --> 00:08:32,212

Rick. Hi.

15600:08:32,485 --> 00:08:35,323I'm so sorry to bother you. It's just Ileft you messages and I didn't hear back.

15700:08:35,373 --> 00:08:37,683And I didn't know if it was 'cause you didn'tget them or if you didn't want to see me...

158

00:08:37,733 --> 00:08:39,483I didn't want to see you.

15900:08:40,453 --> 00:08:41,983Now I know.

16000:08:42,730 --> 00:08:45,960Yes. And I wanted



to give you back the ring.

16100:08:47,568 --> 00:08:49,087There. There.

16200:08:49,754 --> 00:08:52,838I'm so sorry, Rick, aboutthe way everything happened.

16300:08:52,888 --> 00:08:55,501- If I could just turn back time...- Where's the ring?

16400:08:55,968 --> 00:08:57,098It's not there?

16500:08:57,778 --> 00:08:59,530You lost my grandmother's ring?

16600:08:59,580 --> 00:09:01,848It was your grandmother's.It was his grandmother's!

16700:09:01,916 --> 00:09:04,922All right, calm down.Let's retrace our steps.

16800:09:04,972 --> 00:09:07,848- Last night after you humiliated Rick...

- Well, I wouldn't say...

16900:09:07,898 --> 00:09:10,641we went back to your place, you discoveredthe ring was still on your finger.

17000:09:10,691 --> 00:09:12,996- Right.- Then it got stuck on Wayne's finger.

171

00:09:13,046 --> 00:09:15,405- Wayne put it on?- For, like, two seconds.

17200:09:15,715 --> 00:09:19,330Then he ran around the room pretendinghe was Gollum from Lord of the Rings.

173



00:09:20,179 --> 00:09:23,897My precious.

17400:09:25,973 --> 00:09:27,927Oh, that was Gollum.I thought he was doing Yoda.

17500:09:27,977 --> 00:09:28,808Yeah.

17600:09:29,467 --> 00:09:31,123And then Mike didthat magic trick

17700:09:31,173 --> 00:09:34,719where he swallowed it, but it reappearedat the bottom of Leslie's wine glass.

17800:09:34,769 --> 00:09:35,830

No way.

17900:09:36,948 --> 00:09:38,833- That is crazy!- Whoo-hoo-hoo!

18000:09:38,883 --> 00:09:40,695- That was awesome.- Yeah.

181

00:09:40,986 --> 00:09:43,323That ring has beenin our family for 70 years.

18200:09:43,390 --> 00:09:46,726I'm so sorry.I will find it. I promise.

18300:09:47,014 --> 00:09:51,253Can you tell me which of these menis single and makes six figures?

18400:09:56,016 --> 00:09:59,157It's not here. We're nevergonna find this ring.

18500:09:59,506 --> 00:10:01,189- Charlotte.- Yes!



18600:10:01,239 --> 00:10:04,926I just found a big-ass checkmade out to you and Leslie from

18700:10:05,140 --> 00:10:07,653Max Goldberg.Who's Max Goldberg?

18800:10:07,703 --> 00:10:09,724We planned his son'sbar-mitzvah.

18900:10:09,774 --> 00:10:12,221Leslie sent a collectionagency after him.

19000:10:13,483 --> 00:10:15,245What should I do with the check?

19100:10:15,295 --> 00:10:17,995Put it back in the couch.You never saw it.

19200:10:20,398 --> 00:10:22,529- I got it.- Yes, the ring!

19300:10:22,579 --> 00:10:25,534

Nope. The best pick-up line.

19400:10:26,555 --> 00:10:29,250Wayne and I are havinga competition. You ready?

19500:10:29,767 --> 00:10:32,339Do you have a sunburnor are you always this hot?

196

00:10:36,687 --> 00:10:37,895My turn.

19700:10:39,679 --> 00:10:42,453Do you have a sunburnor are you always this hot?

19800:10:45,312 --> 00:10:46,840

That's my line.

19900:10:46,890 --> 00:10:49,444I told you, it's not about the line,it's about the delivery.

20000:10:49,494 --> 00:10:51,474Well, you were supposed to saysomething that you wrote.

20100:10:51,524 --> 00:10:52,633I didn't write anything.

20200:10:52,683 --> 00:10:55,904- What were you doing this whole time?- I was drawing a ninja.

20300:10:58,340 --> 00:11:00,371God, this is awful.

20400:11:00,491 --> 00:11:02,914- First I embarrass him...- Humiliate!

20500:11:02,964 --> 00:11:06,923humiliate him at Yankee Stadiumand then I lose his ring.

20600:11:06,973 --> 00:11:09,702

- His grandmother's ring.- Thank you very, very much.

20700:11:12,307 --> 00:11:14,919So I go to meet the body painter.

20800:11:15,678 --> 00:11:18,467I walk in, scan the room,

20900:11:18,955 --> 00:11:20,847

and then I realizeI have no idea

21000:11:20,897 --> 00:11:23,320what this guy actually lookslike without his body paint.

21100:11:24,794 --> 00:11:26,692

- And then...- Leslie?

21200:11:30,216 --> 00:11:32,606- Well?- Albino.

21300:11:33,371 --> 00:11:35,296Albino?

21400:11:37,161 --> 00:11:39,036- Albino.- What?

21500:11:39,668 --> 00:11:43,218What did you do? Did you run?Did you just run out of there?

21600:11:43,584 --> 00:11:45,399

- No.- I would've run.

21700:11:45,449 --> 00:11:47,649I would've just runout of there.

21800:11:48,377 --> 00:11:52,187I didn't know what to do. I just made upthe first excuse that came into my head.

21900:11:52,237 --> 00:11:53,551I'm engaged.

22000:11:54,892 --> 00:11:56,493The ring!

22100:11:56,565 --> 00:12:00,178I know. I'm sorry. It was on my fingerfrom when Mike and I did the mock wedding.

22200:12:00,228 --> 00:12:01,965What mock wedding?

22300:12:09,742 --> 00:12:11,892You fell asleep.It was beautiful.

224



00:12:12,897 --> 00:12:14,534Okay, wait, wait, wait.What did he say?

22500:12:14,584 --> 00:12:17,219He didn't buy it.He said, "You're not engaged."

22600:12:17,269 --> 00:12:21,169"That's the ring that guy gavethe Yankee Bitch."

22700:12:22,010 --> 00:12:24,310I think that nickname'sgonna stick.

22800:12:25,398 --> 00:12:27,090So what did you do?Did you leave?

22900:12:27,140 --> 00:12:30,488Actually, no.We started chatting.

23000:12:30,538 --> 00:12:33,508And then we ordered a drink.And it turns out...

23100:12:33,558 --> 00:12:34,908You like the albino.

23200:12:36,548 --> 00:12:37,948I like the albino.

23300:12:39,683 --> 00:12:41,717I told him to meet usat the bar later.

23400:12:41,767 --> 00:12:43,217Oh, no, no, no, no.

23500:12:45,553 --> 00:12:48,462No. I'm sorry. I do not thinkI can handle that.

23600:12:48,512 --> 00:12:50,051No. This is perfect.



23700:12:50,275 --> 00:12:52,440I'm gonna call Rick,have him meet us at the bar,

23800:12:52,490 --> 00:12:55,617give him back the ring, and thenI will be done with this. Yes.

23900:12:55,667 --> 00:12:58,167One ring to rule them all.

24000:13:00,872 --> 00:13:03,622I think that's the Cookie Monster.

24100:13:10,449 --> 00:13:13,686I wish Rick would get here.I want to get this over with.

242

00:13:13,736 --> 00:13:16,586I got something to takeyour mind off the whole thing.

24300:13:16,950 --> 00:13:20,450Did I just feel an earthquakeor did you just rock my world?

24400:13:20,516 --> 00:13:21,566Please.

24500:13:21,693 --> 00:13:23,643Come on, Mike,it's getting old.

24600:13:23,952 --> 00:13:25,116How about this?

24700:13:25,166 --> 00:13:28,666Did I just feel an earthquakeor did you just rock my world?

24800:13:28,987 --> 00:13:30,220Yeah.

24900:13:30,480 --> 00:13:33,180Oh, come on, I just saidthe same exact thing!



25000:13:33,399 --> 00:13:38,284I will bet you 100 bucks I can pick up anygirl in this bar with any line you write.

25100:13:38,334 --> 00:13:41,226- Anything I write?- Yeah. It's all in the delivery.

25200:13:41,276 --> 00:13:42,776You are on.

25300:13:43,319 --> 00:13:46,628There is no way a mancould garner a woman's interest

25400:13:46,678 --> 00:13:49,071by saying these words.

255

00:13:51,590 --> 00:13:53,535Okay, that's just disturbing.

25600:13:53,585 --> 00:13:55,626- Any girl, right?- Yeah.

25700:13:56,375 --> 00:13:57,430Her.

258

00:14:00,557 --> 00:14:03,057Candy from a baby.

25900:14:15,712 --> 00:14:19,740In 1775,cancer of the scrotum was a

26000:14:19,971 --> 00:14:22,571common diseaseamong chimney sweeps.

26100:14:32,324 --> 00:14:33,774What's your name?

26200:14:36,891 --> 00:14:38,555Come on!

26300:14:38,738 --> 00:14:42,395



Face it, Mike, there's nothing youcan write that Wayne can't sell.

26400:14:42,454 --> 00:14:43,904Yes, there is.

26500:14:44,388 --> 00:14:48,288Oh, God. You gonna write anotherfun fact about scrotum cancer?

26600:14:49,161 --> 00:14:53,191No. I'm gonna write the one thingthat Wayne will never say to a woman.

26700:14:53,365 --> 00:14:54,531Which is?

26800:14:54,595 --> 00:14:56,838- Hello, Charlotte.

- Rick! Hello.

26900:14:57,252 --> 00:14:58,798Where's my grandma's ring?

27000:14:58,848 --> 00:15:01,785- Rick, could we please talk?- Go ahead. Talk.

27100:15:01,835 --> 00:15:04,238

Well, not in frontof all these people.

27200:15:04,288 --> 00:15:06,188Suddenly you want privacy.

27300:15:11,019 --> 00:15:13,454Mike, I believeyou owe me some money.

274

00:15:13,504 --> 00:15:16,143- Care to go double or nothing?- Yeah. You got a line?

27500:15:18,266 --> 00:15:20,456- What is this?- The truth.

276



00:15:22,025 --> 00:15:23,875I think I'll pass.

27700:15:24,741 --> 00:15:26,941Did you see the internet thing?

27800:15:27,178 --> 00:15:28,228I did.

27900:15:28,726 --> 00:15:30,876They already did a techno remix.

28000:15:33,925 --> 00:15:34,971I know.

28100:15:35,888 --> 00:15:37,98860,000 hits, though.

282

00:15:39,834 --> 00:15:42,334It's terrible.People are terrible.

28300:15:42,746 --> 00:15:44,860Man. Rick looks really mad.

28400:15:44,910 --> 00:15:46,848I wish I knewwhat they were saying.

28500:15:46,898 --> 00:15:48,814Does anybody read lips?

28600:15:48,864 --> 00:15:50,750I'm pretty good at charades.

28700:15:51,026 --> 00:15:53,345- I think it's a movie.- Five words. Sounds like...?

28800:15:53,395 --> 00:15:55,045Children of a Lesser God!

28900:15:55,880 --> 00:15:58,930Guys, they're not actuallyplaying charades.

290



00:15:59,138 --> 00:16:01,146No, it's somethingwith Bruce Willis.

29100:16:01,196 --> 00:16:02,615- Die Hard.- No.

29200:16:02,665 --> 00:16:04,247- Die Hard 2.- No, no.

29300:16:04,670 --> 00:16:07,530What's the one where the little kid,he sees all the ghosts?

29400:16:07,580 --> 00:16:08,680Hi, Leslie.

295

00:16:20,004 --> 00:16:21,310Oh, no, no, no, no.

29600:16:21,360 --> 00:16:23,557I'm sorry. You startled him.

29700:16:23,607 --> 00:16:26,757- He has this thing about...- I thought you were a ghost.

298

00:16:27,066 --> 00:16:29,199No. No, no!

29900:16:33,207 --> 00:16:34,737You were stupid.

30000:16:36,224 --> 00:16:39,329Rick, I'm so sorry.I didn't mean to hurt you.

301

00:16:39,700 --> 00:16:40,836Well, you did.

30200:16:41,195 --> 00:16:42,995And I never guessedin a million years

30300:16:43,045 --> 00:16:46,869



that after only three months of dating,you'd propose at Yankee Stadium.

30400:16:46,919 --> 00:16:48,243Well, I did.

30500:16:51,484 --> 00:16:54,030There'll be someone out therethat says yes.

30600:16:54,080 --> 00:16:56,950So what is it, you're justnot the marrying kind?

30700:16:57,247 --> 00:16:59,510No, Rick, it's not that, it's just...

30800:16:59,560 --> 00:17:02,579It's just you don't want

to marry me.

30900:17:05,478 --> 00:17:06,826I'm sorry, Rick.

31000:17:09,325 --> 00:17:11,391Well, just for the record,

31100:17:12,480 --> 00:17:14,830my grandma

would not have liked you.

31200:17:16,086 --> 00:17:18,746Oh, Rick, pleasedon't be like this!

31300:17:18,981 --> 00:17:21,604- Keep it down, Yankee Bitch!- God.

314

00:17:22,601 --> 00:17:24,865I am not a bitch!

31500:17:25,912 --> 00:17:28,020Technically,I'm not even a Yankee.

31600:17:34,287 --> 00:17:37,045



Leslie, I'm sorry I yelledat your albino friend.

31700:17:38,276 --> 00:17:41,271You didn't yell,you shrieked... like a girl.

31800:17:41,552 --> 00:17:43,710- No, I didn't.- Yes, you did.

31900:17:43,760 --> 00:17:46,612- Wayne, did I shriek?- Like a tiny, tiny girl.

32000:17:49,359 --> 00:17:50,361Charlotte,

32100:17:51,190 --> 00:17:53,281

you're really eating a lot.

32200:17:55,170 --> 00:17:57,453You told me to always tell you.

32300:17:58,139 --> 00:17:59,614Well, I'm upset.

32400:17:59,762 --> 00:18:03,962Well, you got to tell us when you're

upset so we know to order more food.

32500:18:04,986 --> 00:18:06,557This whole Rick thing,

32600:18:06,904 --> 00:18:10,435it's made me realize that forthe first time in my entire life,

32700:18:11,057 --> 00:18:12,393

I want somebody.

32800:18:13,605 --> 00:18:15,305I want somebody forever.

32900:18:15,708 --> 00:18:17,718What if I don't find that person?



33000:18:17,768 --> 00:18:20,004What if the right guy never proposes?

33100:18:20,054 --> 00:18:23,616I'm telling you, guys are gonnapropose simply because of that accent.

33200:18:23,666 --> 00:18:27,266I've known you six years,I've almost proposed like 14 times.

33300:18:28,312 --> 00:18:31,312You had a Mary Poppins thingwhen you were a kid?

33400:18:31,930 --> 00:18:33,278Who didn't?

335

00:18:34,478 --> 00:18:36,535She's a dirty little nanny.

33600:18:37,797 --> 00:18:41,109Hey, guys, I'm not up for the Mary Poppinsdiscussion tonight, just so you know.

33700:18:41,159 --> 00:18:43,991I've got your spoon fullof sugar right here, Mary.

33800:18:45,900 --> 00:18:47,025Right. That's it.

33900:18:47,075 --> 00:18:50,175The Yankee Bitch is throwingyou out. Everyone out.

34000:18:50,669 --> 00:18:52,475I bet if you gota couple drinks in Mary,

34100:18:52,525 --> 00:18:56,639she'd be supercalifragilistic-expiali-delicious.

34200:18:59,766 --> 00:19:02,005- You want us to stay?- I'll be fine.



34300:19:09,755 --> 00:19:11,440Forgot my foam finger,

34400:19:11,688 --> 00:19:14,014helps when I want to hail a cab.

34500:19:16,587 --> 00:19:18,892What was written on thatnapkin Mike gave you?

34600:19:19,350 --> 00:19:22,219The one thing I wouldn't say toa girl I was trying to impress.

34700:19:22,269 --> 00:19:23,741Oh, yeah? Which was?

348

00:19:32,591 --> 00:19:34,491My name is Wayne Rutherford.

34900:19:34,588 --> 00:19:36,438My father is a billionaire.

35000:19:36,629 --> 00:19:38,46018 months ago, he cut me off.

35100:19:38,621 --> 00:19:41,158

I've never held a joband I have no money.

35200:19:41,484 --> 00:19:43,464I sleep on my friend's couch

35300:19:43,971 --> 00:19:47,521and have no idea what I'm gonnado with the rest of my life.

354

00:19:49,993 --> 00:19:52,093Now would that line work on you?

35500:19:53,357 --> 00:19:55,708You're right.That would never work.

35600:20:03,078 --> 00:20:05,178



There's a guy out there for you.

35700:20:05,391 --> 00:20:06,841He's gonna turn up.

35800:20:07,222 --> 00:20:10,042And he's gonna ask you to marry him.And it won't be because of your accent.

35900:20:10,092 --> 00:20:13,142And it won't be becauseyou're wicked in the sack.

36000:20:14,759 --> 00:20:18,009There's only one reasonhe'll want you to be his wife.

36100:20:18,207 --> 00:20:20,422- What?

- You don't know?

36200:20:21,783 --> 00:20:24,083It's 'cause you'reCharlotte Payne.

36300:20:45,516 --> 00:20:46,753What are you writing?

36400:20:46,803 --> 00:20:48,868

This isn't the type of answerpeople normally give, is it?

36500:20:48,918 --> 00:20:51,382Hell, no. Not at all.

36600:20:52,063 --> 00:20:53,631But I think I can help you.

36700:20:53,681 --> 00:20:56,170

Oh, great.Who is my soul mate?

36800:20:57,577 --> 00:21:00,375Ted Merman. He's anaccountant on Long Island.

36900:21:01,707 --> 00:21:03,950



- Really?- No, that's my joke.

37000:21:05,810 --> 00:21:09,251You've only answered one question.We've got a long way to go.

37100:21:09,636 --> 00:21:11,720Now, question #2...

100 questions -1.1.sub.english

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