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Attraction and Love



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Attraction: The Force That Binds?

Physical Attractiveness

± Is beauty in the eye of the beholder?

Cultural standards for physical attractiveness exist.

± Can lead to taking measures to meet cultural expectations

» Anorexia nervosa: Potentially life-threatening eating

disorder characterized by refusal to maintain a healthy

body weight; intense fear of being overweight; a distorted

body image; and, in females, lack of menstruation

(amenorrhea).

± Men prefer women to be somewhat heavier than women think

men do.

± Women prefer men to be somewhat leaner than men think

women do.



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Lesbians physical preferences:

± Prefer heavier women than men

±Reject excessive slenderness as attractive

Nonphysical traits

± Perceived beauty may be enhanced by such traits

as familiarity, liking, respect, and sharing of values

and goals



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Some facial features associated with beauty appear

to be the same across cultures.

Gender-role expectations affect perceptions of physical attractiveness.

± People who act consistent with gender-role expectations

typically are viewed as more attractive.

Peoples names affect perceptions of attractiveness.

± Matthew versus Sylvester

± Christine versus Gertrude



Symmetry of Facial Features

http://videos.howstuffworks.com/hsw/25265-prescribing-beauty-evolving-beauty-

video.htm

http://videos.howstuffworks.com/discovery/35976-science-of-sex-appeal-facial-

symmetry-importance-video.htm

http://videos.howstuffworks.com/discovery/35975-science-of-sex-appeal-attractive-

facial-features-video.htm



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Men report valuing the physical attractiveness of

prospective partners more than women do.

Women report valuing the earning potential of

prospective partners more than men do. ± Although some evidence may support an evolutionary

explanation for attractiveness preferences, it does not fit all

the data.

Both men and women report that personal characteristics (e.g.,

honesty) matter more than physical features do when considering

long-term partners.

And many women also prefer physically attractive partners.

Cultural influences can explain the findings, as well.



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Attraction-Similarity Hypothesis

± People tend to develop romantic relationships

with people who are similar to themselves inattractiveness and other traits.

Exceptions to this hypothesis happen when a lack of

attractiveness is compensated for by other factors.

±Matching can apply to similarity in ethnicity,age, educational level, and religion.



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Attitudes: Do Opposites Attract or Do Birds of

a Feather Flock Together?

± Similarity in attitudes is an important factor inattraction.

± Propinquity (nearness) we tend to live near those

who are similar to us in many ways

± Similarity is more important to women than to men

Reciprocity

± Mutual exchange

People like those who they think like them.



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Is it Biological? ± Bodily changes occur when we feel love:

Chemicals in the brains pleasure system

Hormones Increased nerve growth factor

Is it Psychological lodged in the individual?

Is it Cultural a function of shared beliefs?

What is Love?



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Love and Greek Heritage Philia

± Friendship love

± Based on liking and respect rather than sexual desire

Eros

± The kind of love that is closest in meaning to the modern-day concept of passion

Storge

± Loving attachment and nonsexual affection

± The type of love that binds parents to children

Agape

± Selfless love

± A kind of loving that is similar to generosity and charity



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Romantic Love in

Contemporary Western Culture

Western culture idealizes the concept of

romantic love. In the U.S., most people believe romantic love is a

prerequisite for marriage or other kinds of long-termor permanent relationships.

Romantic love involves emotional highs and lows.

Women justify sexual activity with love, but men donot need to attribute love to sexual urges and behavior



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Love Vs InfatuationInfatuation

± A state of intense absorption in or focus on another person

± Usually involves sexual desire, elation, general

physiological arousal or excitement; passion

± If relationship develops, it typically is enforced by feelings

of attachment and caring.

± Often a passing fancy, but may develop into deeper

feelings and an enduring relationship



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Contemporary Models of Love

± Love as appraisal of arousal (Berscheid & Hatfield)

Romantic love ± A kind of love characterized by feelings of passion and

intimacy

» Physiological arousal that is attributed to feelings of love

» Culture that idealizes romantic love



Copyright2008 Allyn & Bacon 16

Love: The Morning and the

Evening Star? Sternbergs triangular theory of love

IntimacyIntimacy

PassionPassion CommitmentCommitment



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Love: The Morning and the

Evening Star? Sternbergs triangular theory of love

± Types of love

Nonlove

± All components of love are absent.

Liking

± Intimacy is present.

± Passion and commitment are absent.

Infatuation ± Love at first sight

± Passion is present.

± Intimacy and commitment are absent.



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Sternbergs triangular theory of love

±Types of love Empty love

± Commitment is present.

± Passion and intimacy are absent.

Romantic love

± Passion and intimacy are present. ± Commitment is absent.

Companionate love

± Intimacy and commitment are present.

± Passion is absent.



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± Types of love

Fatuous love

± Passion and commitment are present.

± Intimacy is absent.

Consummate love ± Full or complete measure of love

± Combination of passion, intimacy, and commitment

± An ideal type of love

± Harder to maintain than to achieve



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IntimacyIntimacyIntimacyIntimacy

PassionPassion CommitmentCommitment

Romantic

Love

Romantic

Love

Companionate

Love

Companionate

Love

ConsummateLove

Fatuous

Love

Fatuous

Love

Infatuation

Liking

Empty Love

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