now that you’ve said “i do!”

Now That You’ve Said

“I Do!”South Sound Church of

Christ Marriage Workshop?

Future Sessions

1. What Is Marriage?2. Uniqueness and Acceptance in Marriage3. Expectations in Marriage4. Fulfilling Intimacy Needs in Marriage5. Roles Responsibilities and Decision Making6. Communication in Marriage7. Dealing with Conflict in Marriage8. Sex in Marriage

REVIEWHomework Last Week

For Homework

Review Expectations Worksheet (Handout)

FULFILLING INTIMACY NEEDS IN MARRIAGE

Defining Intimacy

What does intimacy mean to you?

What Is Intimacy?The word intimacy actually means “inmost”. Intimacy suggests a very strong personal relationship that connects to our deepest needs, a special emotional closeness that includes understanding and being understood by someone who is very special.

Intimacy is taking the risk to be close to someone and allowing

that someone to step inside your most personal boundaries.

Intimacy means vulnerability, but it also means security.

Intimacy Needs in Marriage

Q. How has intimacy in your marriage lead you to be vulnerable with one another and how has it created security in your relationship with each other?

Evaluating Intimacy in Your Marriage

Emotional IntimacyDo you feel close to one another? Do you feel emotionally supported and

cared for by your mate? emotional intimacy means there is a sharing of your hurts and joys and a sense that each of you is genuinely

interested in the well being of the other.

Evaluating Intimacy in Your Marriage

Social IntimacyDo you have many friends in common as

opposed to socializing separately? Having time together with mutual

friends is an important part of your shared activities.

Evaluating Intimacy in Your Marriage

Sexual IntimacyTrue sexual intimacy involves more than

the mere performance of the sex act, but sexual expression is an essential

part of the relationship.

Evaluating Intimacy in Your Marriage

Intellectual IntimacyIntellectual intimacy involves the

sharing of ideas. In short, when you are intellectually intimate, you talk to each

other. More than just superficial conversations about the weather, you seek input from your mate regarding issues of importance. You value your

mate’s opinion and want to share your own.

Evaluating Intimacy in Your Marriage

Recreational IntimacyYou enjoy and share in many of the

same “just for fun” activities. You have many similar interests.

Evaluating Intimacy in Your Marriage

Spiritual IntimacyFor you to be spiritually intimate, three

criteria must be met:a. You must share common similar beliefs

about God.b. These beliefs must be important and

significant to your lives.c. You must honestly share where you are in

your own spiritual quest.

Emotions Can Affect Intimacy

• Fear• Disappointment• Pleasure• Sadness• Resentment• Hurt

• Frustration• Anxiety• Anger• Joy• Delight• Elation• Love

Dealing with emotions appropriately leads to

intimacy.

Scriptures to Consider

For Discussion

God has promised to meet our intimacy needs.

Q. How do the following passages relate to your needs for intimacy?

Psalm 103:4…who redeems your life from the pit    and crowns you with

love and compassion

Matthew 6:33-34But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things

will be given to you as well. 34 Therefore do not worry about

tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough

trouble of its own.

Romans 5:8, 8:35, 39Ro. 5:8 But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.Ro. 8:35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword?Ro. 8:39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Matthew 6:33-34But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things

will be given to you as well. 34 Therefore do not worry about

tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough

trouble of its own.

For Homework

Take some time together on a date to identify and discuss your intimate needs with each other.•Make plans this week to meet your spouse’s needs.