dialogue section and opening paragraph final.notebook · dialogue section and opening paragraph...

Dialogue section and Opening paragraph final.notebook

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June 11, 2020

Monday 15th June

L.I. to understand how to use dialogue to convey character and advance action

The next part of our narrative we need to plan is the dialogue section


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June 11, 2020

What dialogue do you think happens between these two parts in the story? What characters would you like there

to be in your story?


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June 11, 2020

" Mum, are you ok?" I shouted over the roaring noise of the fire." We've got to get out now!" I sprinted into the next room, shaking mum in a panic. "Come on, " I screamed into her shock filled face as her eyes slowly opened and she saw the smoke filled room."P...Pet...Peter, " she whimpered, "Where's Peter?" Snatching her dressing gown, mum rushed out of the room past the flaming fire. The smoke was intense and we had to cover our mouths to breathe."Peter, where are you?" Mum yelled above the crackling noise. We listened for any noise, but couldn't hear anything above the fire and falling bricks. We were out in the landing now, and mum had reached my brother's room. The door was stiff and it took the both of us to push it open. Smoke had drifted under the door producing a foggy haze making it hard to see inside. "Peter, are you here?" she called out desperately. "James grab your brother," she demanded, "I'll check ahead to see if it's safe". Reaching into the darkness, I found the crib. I reached in and picked up my snuffling brother who was beginning to cough and splutter."It's all right, Peter," I said reassuringly. "We're just going out for a bit, mum's coming with us". With this, Peter gave a smile and clutched me tightly. We left the room and made our way out into the corridor and down the stairs. Mum was already waiting at the front door and I could see the bright sky outside. Clutching my brother I bounded down the stairs and out the door.

Let's read this example together


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June 11, 2020

Lets start by sequencing the events.....

Mine Your turn

In your English books

1. Shouting out for my family

2. Mum responding and tellingme to get my little brother

3. Getting to my sister's room and calming her down

4. Meeting mum and little brother at the top of the stairs


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June 11, 2020

Role PlayWith your partner have a go at practising what you think the

dialogue would be for you sequence of events


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June 11, 2020

In your books, write just the spoken words for you sequence of events.

Don't worry about adding detail, we will do that tomorrow!

Dialogue

"Help! Help! There is a bomb in my room. Mum please help me!" (Ted)

"Ted, don't panic. Whatever you do, do not touch the bomb. Carefully climb over it and go and grab your sister. Meet me at the top of the stairs with her." (Mum)

"What's going on? What was that big bang? I'm scared." (Little sister)

"Don't worry little one, I'll keep you safe. Hop on my back and keep your eyes closed. I am going to get us outside to safety." (Ted)

"No no, please I don't want to. It's too noisy out there, I can see smoke!" Please can we stay in here?" (Little sister)

"Staying here is not a good idea, we're in danger. We need to get out onto the street." (Ted)

"Well done Ted, follow me down the stairs. Stay to the left." (Mum)

"Everything is destroyed. Who would do this?" (Ted)


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June 11, 2020

Day 2


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June 11, 2020

Tuesday 16th June

L.I. to understand how to use dialogue to convey character and advance action


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June 11, 2020

"Help!" screamed Jack, "I'm stuck in my room."

2) Description sandwich

1) Split speech

Fire scolded my white-hot skin, as chunks of brick collapsed at my feet, "Mummy, help!" Time seemed to go on forever as my helpless words echoed through the crumbling hall.

Dialogue section

3) Adverb, adjective, dialogue Shouting helplessly, Phillip yelled, "I'm stuck, help me out."

"Help!""I'm coming, where are you?""I'm in the kitchen."Just then, a terrifying crash flew through my ears, everywhere I looked, there was only destruction and chaos. The roof had collapsed.

4) Quick speech, extended description


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June 11, 2020

"Help! Help! There is a bomb in my room. Mum please help me!" "Jack, don't panic. Whatever you do, do not touch the bomb. Carefully climb over it and go and grab your sister. Meet me at the top of the stairs with her." "What's going on? What was that big bang? I'm scared." "Don't worry little one, I'll keep you safe." "Hop on my back and keep your eyes closed. I am going to get us outside to safety." "No no, please I don't want to. It's too noisy out there, I can see smoke! Please can we stay in here?""Staying here is not a good idea, we're in danger. We need to get out onto the street."

Have a go on your WBs

How can I add detail to this? How many different types of dialogue can you use?


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June 11, 2020

Key vocabulary incendiary device, bomb, ceiling, roof, fire, explosion, crack, wreckage, debris, tiles, cylinder, metal, delayed action explosive unit, fuse, arming wire, explosive nosebounced, rebounded, narrowly missing my bed, miraculously, one in a million chance it exploded up the chimney...

Tuesday 16th June 2020L.I. to understand how to use dialogue to convey character and advance action

• Have a go at re-writing your dialogue adding detail to show character and action. • Try and vary the type of speech you use. It doesn't have to be exactly the same as yesterday!• Use blue pen to write the additional detail• 6 x dialogue roughly....you don't need too much


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June 11, 2020

Day 3


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June 11, 2020

Wednesday 17th June 2020

L.I. Use varied and precise vocabulary to create particular stylistic effects

L.I. to choose style/genre features to maintain and challenge reader‛s interest


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June 11, 2020

The final paragraph we are going to plan, the first in our narrative is setting the

scene for when the bomb hits.

It will be short and sweet!

1) Jack sound asleep 2) Suddenly woken by the bomb coming through the roof.3) Watching in dismay and shock and relief and confusion as the bomb bounces etc- also you know a bit about the

bomb 4) Seeing the bomb and realising it was an incendiary

bomb- a fire bomb!5)The bomb explodes up the chimney and smoke and fire

fills the room

It must link directly into the dialogue!

u


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June 11, 2020

Lets look at an example

Breathing slowly and evenly Jack was in a deep sleep. Sounds of a spitfire filled his dreams as he dreamt of flying through the sky, zipping through the clouds. All of a sudden, he was woken from his dream with a roaring noise. His eyes shot open in time to see a flash of metal bounce over his bed. This unknown object bounced just in front of the chimney; then it darted up the chimney. With horror, Jack looked on, a moment of realisation dawning on him. It was a bomb! BANG! A dazzle of gleaming light sprung out.


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June 11, 2020

Key vocabulary incendiary device, bomb, ceiling, roof, fire, explosion, crack, wreckage, debris, tiles, cylinder, metal, delayed action explosive unit, fuse, arming wire, explosive nosebounced, rebounded, narrowly missing my bed, miraculously, one in a million chance it exploded up the chimney...

Draft your paragraph

In your draft books, have a go at drafting your first paragraph


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June 11, 2020

Peer Assessment

You are going to spend some time sharing your paragraph with your partner.

Listen carefully to your partner's work and give them feedback on what they have done well and some constructive improvements

- vocabulary choices- sentence openers- sentence structure


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June 11, 2020

Write up your paragraph into your books

Wednesday 17th June 2020

L.I. Use varied and precise vocabulary to create particular stylistic effects

L.I. to choose style/genre features to maintain and challenge reader‛s interest


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June 11, 2020

Thursday 18th June 2020

Copy up your whole piece of writing in order in your best handwriting onto the border paper

Once you've finished, you can have a go at the comprehension


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June 11, 2020

dialogue section and opening paragraph final.notebook · dialogue section and opening paragraph...

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