ELEMENTARY SCHOOL SUCCESS

Joanne Lynch Blaney

School Counselor

What is Success?

Definition– To prosper– To thrive– To achieve

“To come through with flying colors.”“To earn one’s wings.”

What is Success for an Elementary School Age Child?

A successful child- is eager to try new things- appears happy and content- demonstrates positive self-esteem- enjoys friendships- recognizes his/her achievements- is interested in learning

The Keys to Success

Parents are the keys to their children’s success in school!

PARENTS

P = Physical CareA = Academic PursuitsR = ResiliencyE = EsteemN = Nurture T = Time OutS = Social Skills

P = Physical Care

Maslow’s Hierarchy of Basic Needs

SELF-ACTUALIZATION

SELF-ESTEEM

BELONGING & LOVE

SAFETY

PHYSICAL

P = PHYSICAL CARE

“A family is a safe island.”“Inner security is born at home.”

Dr. M. Scott Peck

- Sleep- Nutrition- Exercise- Limits- Balance

A = ACADEMIC PURSUITS

Successful Children Enjoy Learning.

- Create a study environment- Provide materials- Emphasize the importance of learning- School involvement- Limit TV and other electronics- Focus on strengths - praise effort- Set high expectations

R = RESILIENCY

“Flexibility is the hallmark of a survivor personality.” Al Siebert

- Coping Skills & Stress- Problems are temporary, specific, &

impersonal- Develop workable plans- OPTIMISM

E = ESTEEM

Components of self-esteem

1. Basic Worth: I am loveable.

2. Competence: I am capable.

E = ESTEEM: Basic Worth

“The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves.”

Thomas Merton

Basic Worth affects:- how a child feels about himself- how a child views the world- the choices that a child

makes in life

E = ESTEEM: Basic Worth

• Parents can help raise their child’s sense of self-worth by:

-The generous use of positive feedback- Be specific- Be sincere- Go public!

-Listen and communicate- Be attentive- Be respectful

E = ESTEEM: Competence

Successful children have an “I can do”Attitude!

Competence is effective when it has expectations that are:

- Reasonable- Age Appropriate

N = NURTURE

• Definition:- to care - to guide- to comfort- to nourish - to cherish- to “parent”

N = NURTURE

Children who are successful in school have parents who nurture them.

- Establish Family Traditions- Dinner time = Conversations- New Experiences- Family Values and Beliefs

T = TIME OUT

Discipline and Punishment

- Discipline is not punishment.- Punishment is what we do to control our

children.- Discipline is how we teach our children to

control themselves.

T = TIME OUT

Effective Discipline- Focuses on the Behavior- Age Appropriate

Behaviors = Consequences

Consequences:- Clear- Respectful- Firm - Consistent- Reasonable

S = SOCIAL SKILLS

“Children with good social and problem solving skills make new friends. They are comfortable in new situations.” Martin Seligman

Social Competence is necessary for success in today’s world.

S = SOCIAL SKILLS

Social Competence means developing Interpersonal Skills

- Skill of Initiating- Skill of Assertiveness- Skill of Listening- Skill of Cooperating- Skill of Negotiating

S = SOCIAL SKILLS

Interpersonal Skills

- Initiating: Greeting others

- Assertiveness: “I- messages”

Passive Assertive Aggressive

MeOthers

MeOthers

Me

Others

S = SOCIAL SKILLS

Interpersonal Skills (con’t)

- Listening: Attentiveness

- Cooperating: Sharing, CooperationCooperation vs. Competition

- Negotiating: Win/Win, Forgiveness

CONCLUSION

“Nothing will help children succeed in schools more than parents who provide a safe and loving environment and take care of their children’s physical and emotional needs.” Staff writer from Barrow Journal

RESOURCES

www.practicalhelpforparents.com www.overindulgenceinf.com www.parentsoup.com www.parenting.com www.aboutourkids.org