esea 15 - performance enhancement

eSeaM A R I T I M E / O I L & G A S / W I N D / C R A N E · N O . 1 5 / 2 0 1 3

EM AGA ZINE FROM M A ERSK TR A INING

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Gulf Lessons >Keep taking the tablets > What exactly is Performance Enhancement? >When BP means Better Prepared > Nintendo boys, game on >Puffed, but the magic drags on >No bang Bang >Girls Allowed >Every Boat Tells a Story >Science - stronger than steel >All fired up >Space, the final frontier >

performance enhancement

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Gulf Lessons They came from the dusty dryness of a Dallas highway, from the muggy mosquitoness of a Mobile porch, from the blustery breezyness of a Biloxi waterfront. >

No bang BangThe ultimate form of performance enhancement must be where you stare death directly in the face. What if it is your chosen career path and you do it daily? Thoughts of a bomb disposal expert. >

Keep taking the tabletsThe success of tablet technology has far outstretched the visions of the first reviewers. Today it is a tool being used in the most diverse of industries. >

What exactly is Performance Enhancement?In the offshore world it now means standing back from the routine and technical in order to learn how to examine individual and team effectiveness. >

Girls AllowedThe issue of women ‘getting their hands dirty’ in the oil and gas business is no longer taboo. Nowadays it’s freely talked about, without the fear of social exclusion. >

Every Boat Tells a Storyt may be only ten foot long, but the story behind it revealed a wonderful Danish sporting tale which went right to the top of the A.P. Moller - Maersk Group organisation. >

Science - stronger than steelEver since the day after man first realised that wood could float and carry him and his goods, the value of a piece of rope has often been grossly underrated. >

Space, the final frontierGone are the days at Maersk Training in Esbjerg when on arrival, it might have seemed you’d stumbled into a major emergency situation. >

Puffed, but the magic drags onAn open water swim of 3.86km, a cycle race of 180.25 km and to round it off, a marathon at 42.2 km – the Ironman World Championships in Hawaii has been drawing and exhausting the best athletes for 35 years. >

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There was a time when the expression

performance enhancement immediately

flashed up an image of a racing cyclist or

something you added to the oil in your car.

This eSea is performance enhanced in that

for the first time it will have a wider physical

appeal. You might be reading this off a screen,

or have it on paper, in your hands.

Evolution has taken the process of conveying

a message off a cave wall and onto fabulously

colour-filled of electrical tablets. Somewhere

in the middle, the most lasting of all forms of

transmitting information, paper and ink, is

now desperately trying to come to terms with

where it sits in the 21st century.

Newspapers and even magazines are trying to

compete in a race where they are handicapped

by lack of immediacy and a public desire

for sound and movement. Only one thing

sustains commercial life, revenue. We’ve

reached a stage where even the world’s oldest

newspaper is handed out for free, the paper,

print and every wage packet, paid for by

advertising.

Henry Ford once said that a business that

stops advertising to save money is like a man

who stops the clock to save time. He was right

from the day he said it until today where there

are many other effective ways of getting the

advertising message across, and cheaper.

Maersk Training put a video out recently

giving an insight into its Svendborg

operation – in 25 days it had been watched by

44,951people, the cost to the company was,

per person, relatively insignificant compared

to the more traditional avenues of brochure

production or advertising in a trade magazine.

See the video

The days of the small local newspaper as

we know it are numbered. Through all the

changes one thing will remain crucial,

information in the power of an authenticated

story with the strength of a genuine picture.

Journalists will have to follow the same

revolutionary path as that of musicians.

The only problem is that every song we listen

to on iTunes or Spotify creates a fraction of

the income the rock legends once enjoyed.

Gone are the days of a record deal, a CD selling

in millions, gone is the big money. What

we are left with is a form of performance

enhancement, the music we listen to today

is crafted to be heard and passed on – it’s not

there for the quick buck. Singers and bands

are like micro-breweries catering for a defined

market.

So whether you can fold this eSea or need

to recharge it, we trust you will take

enlightenment from its most stable of

attributes, highly digestible information.

editorialRichard [email protected]

4

Although they had come from four

continents there was an overall

air of Little America at Maersk

Training’s simulation complex

in Svendborg. Two crews, each

spending a week, in what was to

be the culmination of two year’s

hard work for an awful lot of

people.

The crews from Maersk Drilling’s

first drillship were there to

put the multi-million dollar

MOSAIC complex through its

ultimate challenge. Indeed the

Maersk Offshore Simulation

and Innovation Centre was

conceived for this very moment

when a complete crew could

come together under one roof

and interact in a single scenario

drawing maximum performance

from every participant.

BEST PREPARED CREWS EVERIn return, almost to a man,

they reported that it was the

finest training session they had

Gulf LessonsThey came from the dusty dryness of a Dallas highway, from the muggy mosquitoness of a Mobile porch, from the blustery breezyness of a Biloxi waterfront; only those from the sodden sogginess of a Stonehaven Sunday felt immediately at home. Denmark welcomed them by ending one of the best summers in years the day before the course started.

5Gulf Lessons

attended and Erik Rosen Larsen,

Head of Organisation Capabilities,

Human Resources, pronounced

them the best prepared crews

ever to set off on a Maersk Drilling

project.

What was achieved in little under

a week was, according to Erik,

quite remarkable. He likened it

to a Hollywood movie in terms of

preparation and execution, but

one where they only knew the

start and maybe the intended end

point.

Erik explained ‘There is a major

difference between normal

training exercises and this in that

this is scenario-based so we are

following a script. The script has

a starting point and maybe has

an idea of where it is going to end

but that depends on the decisions

the leaders are making. They

have a decision tree out there

and whether they go for X, Y or

Z we don’t know, so the scenario

develops throughout the evening.’

He was referring to the

culmination of the first three days

training, a single exercise which

drew together drillers, engineers,

DP officers, crane operators as

well as management task teams

in an emergency control room

ashore and a hastily called crisis

team at headquarters – they had

just 17 minutes to get from home

to the office.

What was unique was the extra

emphasis on self-examination and

successfully converting individual

abilities into a team performance.

Specialist instructors pulled

the hardened oilmen into new

areas of ‘soft’ training were the

initial ripples of discomfort and

reluctance were calmed by the

realisation that to listen and to

act was to improve.

A RARE MIXTUREThe course week was labelled

Performance Enhancement, and it

was exactly that, taking a bunch

of people who had never met and

turning them into a single team

eager to get out there and get

on with the job. Here we have to

resist the temptation to unfold

the whole process for on the heels

of Drillship 1 will come the crews

to man ships two, three and four.

What we can say is that from

what they eat to how they think

will be examined and developed.

From day one specialist coaches

set about taking the two groups

of men, and one female dynamic

positioning operative, over a

hundred people in all and turning

them into more than just units

but two crews with fit and

focused individuals. It was a rare

mixture of classic classroom

and simulated scenarios with

additional team-building

exercises and they even found

time to fit in a fifteen year old

movie where a Texan oil team

manage to save the earth ... any

guesses to title?*

The end product was according

to general opinion that Maersk

Drilling had welcomed them

into the company with care and

consideration they had never

before witnessed in the industry

and that the team at Maersk

Training had given them the best

learning experience they’d ever

had.

*Armageddon (1998)

Specialist instructors pulled the hardened oilmen into new areas of ‘soft’ training were the initial ripples of discomfort and reluctance were calmed by the realisation that to listen and to act was to improve.

Hamburgefintsiv 6

Keep taking the tablets

participants to mark important

points and passages and then

find them again using the search

facility. For the full five days

the participants had, at their

fingertips, all the information

they needed to gain the most from

the course.

ELECTRONIC BONUSAnd the additional bonus of

it being electronic is that it

is easy for the instructors to

update manuals. For this and for

recharging they have a special

‘garage’ – they are slipped in like

sliced bread into a toaster.

The iPads had already had a trial

run, they carried not manuals

but confidential ‘for reading

only’ details which contributed

valuable background to a people

skills course, but facts that were

released to Maersk Training on

the sole condition that they could

not be transferred onto paper.

After just 44 months on the

market the gadgets have come of

age and are now used as tools in

performance enhancement.

Jessie BeckDrilling Section Leader

'For me as a drilling section

leader who hadn’t been on a rig

for six months, getting thrown

back in like that helped me a lot.

I’ve been on simulators but they

are nothing like this – it goes to

the bottom of the well, shows

you formations, gas pressures,

where the gas is, casing shoes,

everything – it felt real, it

seemed if it was the real thing.'

See the video

Jacob WhiteSafety Officer

'They are a new team who

haven’t be together so instead

of being out on a rig and having

it in real life and not knowing

what everybody else can do,

here they are learning in a safe

environment.'

See the video

Erik Roesen LarsenHead of Organisational

Capabilities HR

'It is fair to say this is the best

prepared team ever in the

history of Maersk Drilling. We

have never had a team more

ready for the acceptance test.'

See the video

James RoystonElectrician

'I’m impressed in that we

have this available to us – it

is unlike anything I have ever

seen. It wasn’t just a class

it was probably the realist

training I’ve ever gotten to do

in a group like this. The tension

was so great that we forgot

people were looking at us to gel

together and deal with every

problem that came at us.'

See the video

Views from Maersk Viking

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8

Performance enhancement is

a jacket which comes in many

colours and sizes. On the factory

floor it can be in simplifying the

production process; in sport it

can be in diverting from physical

preparation to include mental

relaxation and in the offshore

world it now means standing back

from the routine and technical

in order to learn how to examine

individual and team effectiveness.

In common the aim is for

enhanced performance through

improving communications and

openness so everyone in the team

has a better understanding of

what they can expect from each

other.

Grabbing a sporting analogy

from Formula 1, the driver is the

star of the car, but he is totally

dependent on every single

member of a team. Long gone are

the old days when the driver was

‘a bit of a lad’, when pit stops took

minutes, when safety was just a

word. Every action from every

person, from wheel jack man

to driver, requires precision of

performance.

Today every movement on a

rig or drillship is practised to

perfection, with every movement

backed by personal excellence.

That personal faultlessness

is built by performance

enhancement – from the food they

What exactly is Performance Enhancement?

8

Hamburgefintsiv 9

eat, the lifestyle they conduct,

the way they think and react.

They are all broken down and

then rebuilt so that the individual

contributes totally to the team

without losing that spark of

individuality. It is a training

formula which can be applied

throughout the offshore world

and other similar industries.

DISCOMFORT ZONESThat, in its essence, is what

performance enhancement is

all about. The first programme

for the new drillship crews

took them out of the simulators

and indeed out of the building

where they literally started with

constructing new foundations.

People skills specialists then

asked the participants to reflect

on everything that they do, down

to fundamental attitudes, and

values, and the impact of these on

their behaviour and less desirable

work habits. The journey of the

programme continued to push

them in and out of their comfort

zones, with the simulators

providing a familiar sight, but

with technical instructors

ensuring they were challenged.

Throughout the process there

were opportunities for the crew

to reflect through feedback

and discussion. Then, when

everything was in place, one

final exercise pushed them

towards new boundaries. Here,

the multidisciplinary crew

demonstrated a new found ability

to manage the most demanding

of situations, both safely and to

optimal performance. The end

product is a refocused individual,

working in a highly competent

and high performing team,

ready to safely and successfully

take on the most demanding of

operations.

9What exactly is Performance Enhancement?

10

Trying to organise fifteen people to come together for five days on a course is not easy. Especially when the fifteen belong to a rig team that is based in the Nile delta and they come from the United States, Australia, Denmark, Scotland, England, the Philippines and the Middle East. Finding a convenient location for all is impossible, even a compromise is a logistical puzzle beyond most.

When BP meansBetter Prepared

10

When BP means Better Prepared

Oil major BP found one in MOSAIC,

Maersk Training in Svendborg’s

offshore simulation complex. But

only just, ‘we’d have like to run

three courses, but the guys here

at Maersk Training are just so

busy they could only find time for

one, ‘ says Carlos Schiavenato,

Well Control Program Manager

for the Global Wells Institute, part

of BP’s American set-up.

ENLIGHTENINGNormally Carlos’s BP team would

conduct exercises like the Applied

Deepwater Well Control course at

their Houston base, but because

of the geographical spread of

the crew on this occasion, they

decided to look for a location

which would cut down air

miles, be more convenient to the

participants and be more cost

effective. So Svendborg turned

out to be their new epicentre

and according to Carlos it was

an enlightening experience, ‘we

have simulators in Houston but

nothing like what you have here.’

After the Macondo tragedy, BP,

and the rest of the industry,

realised that something needed

to be done and that not just

new levels in training had to

be achieved but that the whole

industry needed to conform to

universally rigid standards.

‘When you look at other

industries where there is a

constant need for diligence and

regulations, like the nuclear

and chemical industries, the oil

industry were idling far behind.’

HUMAN FACTORSWith homes dotted across the

planet, they had been drawn to

Svendborg to practice drilling a

GEB exploration well using the

semi-sub Maersk Discoverer in

waters off the Egyptian northern

coast. The whole operation was

technically tailored to what they

might expect and therefore be able

and more effective in coping with

what nature had to throw at them.

Carlos explained, ‘What we

normally try to do with these

teams is not only to bring the

basics of well control, but in a

refreshing non-testing mode, we

don’t come here to test the guys,

we come to observe and provide

feedback about how they face well

control activities or problems. The

scenarios we create look at the

way they communicate, manage

stressful situations, interact with

each other and so forth.’

The overall aim is to make sure

that everyone’s up to a certain

standard and conceptual level

but it also examines the human

factors like crew resource

management which helps the

organisation to understand

where, in a team environment,

the crew can be prepared to do a

better job.

‘When you look at other industries where there is a constant need for diligence and regulations, like the nuclear and chemical industries, the oil industry were idling far behind.’

11

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Training today is inverted from

what it was in the recent past.

Gone are the days of learning

by repetition, by simply reading

and remembering. Today we are

training the Nintendo generation

and according to chief instructor

Just Sverre Wessel, as much is

drawn out of the participant as is

pumped in.

‘Instead of listening to a

PowerPoint presentation they

are getting hands- on in the

simulators and in fact are doing

their own lectures, and part of the

joy is they don’t realise it because

the experience is so much more

fulfilling,’ says Just sitting in the

driller’s chair with his hands on

the controls of the custom-built

simulator at Maersk Training in

Stavanger, Norway.

The change is performance

enhancing in that he used to see

people arriving on courses with

a test/certificate mentality. Now

they might arrive like that but

once they get hands on in the

simulators they start to answer

questions for themselves that

have puzzled them all their

careers. ‘Here they can share

their experiences and answers

and hopefully take a few steps

forward,’ says Just.

THEY JUST WOULDN’T LEAVEHe added, ‘We open up a whole

new world to them. Courses used

to have schedule, like a normal

working day. Last Friday they

should have finished at 4.30 but

five hours later the entire team

were still in here and didn’t want

to leave until they’d cracked it!’

Just got onto the subject of how

the use of simulators is seen, or

mis-seen from outside. ‘This is a

gigantic PlayStation, but it is one

which allows them to discuss to

share and debate the physics of

drilling a well and this is where

the gold nuggets are to be found.’

The simulator complex in

Stavanger is used by many of

the leading companies in the

world of North Sea exploration

and recovery. We gathered

three representatives of three

companies, Total, Statoil and

Talisman, at the simulator

complex and put questions to

them about how they see the

future for the region, and beyond.

We put questions to

• Project Leader Drilling

Bjørn Risvik (Statoil)

maer.sk/training-statoil

• Operational Safety Leader

Oddvar Tønnesen (Total)

maer.sk/training-total

• Senior Drilling Manager

Sigve Pedersen (Talisman)

maer.sk/training-talisman

Nintendo boys, game on12

13

It is one of the most soul-

destroying of sounds, the dong

preceding an airport announcer’s

message. You just know the news

isn’t going to be good. Thomas

and girlfriend Tine were already

shattered from the hardest

experience paradise can throw at

you, when they heard the words

‘Copenhagen ... delayed’.

They were returning from

Thomas competing in the original

and hardest of all Ironman

competitions, the ultimate

triathlon held each year in

Hawaii. They were on their own

triathlon, three legs of a journey

from Honolulu to San Francisco

to Washington to Copenhagen,

when the clock stopped.

However the six and a half hour

delay in Washington’s Dulles

International Airport proved to

be a pain barrier that was worth

enduring.

In amateur sport it is positively the ultimate of tests, an open water swim of 3.86km, a cycle race of 180.25 km and to round it off, a marathon at 42.2 km – the Ironman World Championships in Hawaii has been drawing and exhausting the best athletes for 35 years. For Thomas Posborg Nielsen, a fire and safety instructor from Aalborg, a wildcard entry offered him the chance of his sporting life on the island famous for surfing, pineapples and home to Puff the Magic Dragon.

Puffed, but the magic drags on

13

14Puffed, but the magic drags on

‘I can’t fully express how fantastic

an experience the Hawaiian trip

was, but it was expensive. Boy

was it expensive; it has cleaned

us out for a while, dug a big hole.

Then today SAS paid us €1,200

for the flight delay,’ said an

increasingly happy Thomas.

Thomas is 25 and should he live to

be a hundred he will never forget

competing in the Hawaiian event.

It was only his second triathlon.

In the summer he competed in

the Copenhagen event where he

was outside the qualifying times

but gained a wildcard entry to the

race of races. The only problem

was that he had to pretty well

fund himself. He found three

sponsors, but most of the costs

were down to him and long term

girlfriend Tine.

MORE THAN A BUG‘The problem is that for me

the Ironman bug bit me in

Copenhagen, but in Hawaii it

became a disease ... and worse

Tine fell madly in love with the

place so we have to go back,’ says

Thomas.

As an emergency survival

instructor at the Danish

Emergency Management Agency

in Thisted, he is well aware of the

need to plan and how to enhance

performance and he knows that

the road back to Hawaii can only

be travelled if he improves his

timings.

‘You only ever get one wildcard,

so now it is up to me. I have set

myself a number of targets. The

main one is to get back on merit

because that’s the only way, but

you will never meet just the main

one if it is in isolation so you have

to have smaller ones,’ he says.

Much about performance

enhancement is in how you

analyse performances past. For

Thomas the event on the Big

Island at Kona was an eye-opener.

© FinisherPix.com © FinisherPix.com © FinisherPix.com

15Puffed, but the magic drags on

His timing for the 226 kilometre

event was actually more than an

hour slower than his first outing

but his performance was riddled

with key learning moments.

For instance his bike had been

set up for Danish conditions.

This was OK when he did some

practice rides on arrival, but on

those occasions he left the hotel

and returned the bike to its safe,

shaded location. On race day it sat

out in the sun whilst Thomas did

the swim and the air expanded

so that for the first 5kms he was

riding as if with the brakes on!

Two kilometres later his saddle

went down and he couldn’t adjust

it until he got tools at the first aid

station at 20km. The marathon

temperature was stifling for

someone used to running round

Aalborg, but he did it and didn’t

join the list of those unable to

finish.

‘The run was by far the toughest I

have ever tried! And so said many

of the other athletes afterwards.

But I would do it again and again

and again. I feel very privileged to

have been given the opportunity

to participate in this amazing

event,’ he says.

ANXIOUS MOMENTSThomas, like all the competitors,

wore a tracking device so that

times could be precise. With

modern technology it was

possible for this family at home

to follow him every step of the

way, which was more than on-

site Tine could do because of the

bad internet connections on the

island.

‘Twice the tracing system lost

contact and everyone thought I’d

given up,’ he says, ‘but actually

because of the bad wifi locally,

those in Denmark were SMSing

Tine with updates. In the end of

the (12:38:14 seconds) race Tine

maybe only saw me for five or ten

minutes,’ he pointed out.

For the time being life is back in

Aalborg, slowly bringing down

the amount of exercise so that the

muscles can adapt before they

are built up again for the next big

challenge.

On the recent performance

enhancement course at Maersk

Training in Svendborg much was

made of linking diet to how you

react in the work environment.

Thomas’s secret power drink is

beetroot juice and vegetables

play a big role in his build up

along with chicken and masses

of carbohydrates. ‘I’m always

hungry because of the many

workout hours,’ he says. In a week

he runs, cycles and swims for

about twice the amount of time he

will take in the race.

If you like beetroot and are

inspired by Thomas you have

plenty of time to train, the next

Copenhagen Ironman in August,

is already booked out, so plan for

2015.

Thomas is entered for Copenhagen

2014, but he might have a very

busy year, in Maui he had enough

energy left to get down on one

knee and put his ‘support team’ on

a more formal level, he proposed

to girlfriend of seven years, Tine

- now that’s one way to enhance

your performance!

'I would do it again and again and again.

I feel very privileged to have been given the opportunity

to participate in this amazing event’

© FinisherPix.com

16

Thomas’s secret weapon is

beetroot juice but there are

five foods or additives which

nutritionist and professional

triathlete Pip Taylor says will

enhance your performance ...

some of them might surprise you.

EGGS: Eggs are the protein pill to

outlast all others. Highly

digestible they are also rich

in vitamins, minerals, Omega

3 fats and antioxidants, and

contribute significantly to energy

production, strength and power

as well as muscle synthesis and

recovery. Convenient, cheap and

easy to prepare make eggs an

athlete-friendly dish.

BUTTER: Perhaps surprise number one,

but saturated fat is not the villain

it was once thought to be, and in

fact offers many health benefits.

Saturated fats are necessary

for brain function, support the

immune system and metabolism,

as well as cell structure and

function.

TURMERIC (GURKEMEJE): It sounds like we are creating an

Indian dish here, but this powered

root may inhibit the production of

inflammatory markers in muscle

tissue, and enhance post-exercise

muscle repair. Turmeric has

also been shown to assist with

circulation and the delivery of

oxygen to working muscles.

MINT: Just the smell of it can help boost

performance. Studies reveal

that speed and strength are

positively affected by the odor of

peppermint or spearmint.

DARK CHOCOLATE: It’s not a surprise that we feel

boosted by eating it and it

improves muscle functioning but,

especially for triathletes, a recent

discovery is that cocoa has the

ability to act as a mild sunscreen.

When consumed in just 20 grams

of dark chocolate, flavanols—one of

the many antioxidants in cocoa—

reduce UV-induced skin burning

and help to fight off skin cancers

So the perfect meal for

performance is curried buttered

eggs followed by an After Eight

mint!

Faster Food

17

Great North Swim

Its dry version is the biggest race

of the year in the UK, with over

50,000 taking part in the Great

North Run; the thirty standing

on the pontoon on the Tyne were

taking part in the third ‘running’

of the wetter version – a 16

kilometre swim from Newcastle

to South Shields.

One of the thirty swimming for

three hours in chilly water and

facing an ever toughening task

as river gave way to estuary

was Andy Greener, by day an

instructor at Maersk Training in

Newcastle, and on this weekend

a three time veteran of the very

hard swim. Andy explained that

the swim had been designed to

mimic the half marathon, but

this year because of bad weather

at the end of September, it was

held in October. It produced extra

challenges, colder and choppier

than usual and three of the

swimmers gave up. Andy Greener being interviewed on

BBC television.

17

Hamburgefintsiv 18

The ultimate form of performance enhancement must be where you stare death directly in the face. Some people do it for fun a once-in-a-lifetime parachute or bungee jump, but what if it is your chosen career path and you do it daily? Someone like a bomb disposal expert.

‘I can’t quite explain where it

comes from, but to this day there

is nothing more exciting to me

than clearing bombs and mines.

There’s nothing that comes even

close to it. The movie Hurt Locker

actually in a good way descripts

the adrenaline kick you get

addicted to.’

The voice comes from behind a

large orderly desk, the desk of a

man whose role in life is to create

a culture of safety in industries

which are potentially hazardous.

It does not display the dangers

of his former occupation. He is

Michael Bang, managing director

of Maersk Training in Svendborg.

In his past life Michael has

defused discarded WW2 bombs

and ammunition in Denmark,

mines and badly stored

explosives in Bosnia and a whole

host of ‘nasty’s’ in Iraq. What lead

him to sitting in the MD’s chair

was not a chosen route, it was

circumstantial; when he left the

army he joined Maersk Training’s

No bang Bang

Bullets, bombs and booby traps but

19No bang Bang

People Skills department, a brief

period in another industry was

followed by a role in Maersk

Training in Esbjerg where he

eventually took the helm. From

there it was back to Svendborg

this summer, sitting in an office

across the corridor where five

years ago he planned courses to

enhance personal skills.

The contrast in job is not matched

by a contrast in work styles.

Michael believes that although

the army trains you to react in

certain ways, there is a growing

requirement for what might be

seen as individualism, but one

that still stays within certain

confines.

‘In the army when you issue an

order it is to ensure that everyone

has the same information, and

that is much the same with our

monthly meetings. It to make

sure that we all have the same

understanding of the situation so

that if anything goes wrong we

can all act accordingly.’

NO SECOND CHANCESIn a conflict situation there is

already a built-in error factor. An

alarming 10% of factory-made

ammunition doesn’t work but still

remains dangerous, perhaps even

more so.

The job of a munitions disposal

expert is probably the only one

on earth where the term expert is

universally correct for everyone

who does it. You can have good

and bad doctors; they after

all bury their mistakes, bomb

disposal officers don’t live to see

theirs.

In ordinance disposal there is

rarely a second chance, so you

would think that if you were

given one you would immediately

take a different route. Michael’s

hands bear some scars from the

detonator blast of an anti-tank

mine which blew up 20cms from

him. ‘I spent two weeks picking

bits out of my hands, but when

back in Denmark I decided I still

hadn’t finished with this. I applied

for the bomb squad and after a six

week course spent a year dealing

with old German mines on the

Danish west coast and British

bombs that hadn’t detonated,’ he

recalls.

There are not many parallels in

life to that of being a munitions

disposal expert or a soldier in a

conflict zone, except perhaps in

the anxiety shared by families

remotely detached at home –

something seafarers families go

through in piracy affected areas.

FORK IN THE ROAD ‘When I was in Iraq the first

Danish soldier since 1864 to die in

active service died on my shift –

my wife and family were at home

watching a handball game on

television when the news trickled

along the top of the screen. Maria,

my wife, phoned the headquarters

and said I know you can’t tell me

the name, but is Bang on the list.

There was relief at the answer,

but the anxiety remains,’ he said.

It would have been very different

story, when as a long haired

heavy metal rocker, Michael

volunteered to be called up to

the army. On finishing national

service he had two choices. ‘There

was the fork in the road, to the left

university studying history to the

right a military career,’ he pointed

out.

In a strange way the fork has

come together. Taking his

children round the Tøjhusmuseet

(the military museum) in

Copenhagen there was an

impressive sand-filled display

from Iraq, complete with a

bombed car, ‘it was an odd feeling

communicating my connection to

the scene to the children,’ he said.

Of course Michael’s children

share his surname which, we feel

we can’t leave the subject without

referring to – a bomb disposal

officer called Bang.

‘Try working with the Americans

and British with a surname

like that – the Americans

automatically presumed it was

just a nickname.’

20

The issue of women ‘getting

their hands dirty’ in the oil and

gas business is no longer taboo.

Nowadays it’s freely talked

about, without the fear of social

exclusion. As a society, we

recognize that gender imbalance

in the workplace – and quite

specifically within the oil and

gas industry – is very much an

issue. It might have taken us a

generation but we’re certainly

getting there.

One of the most important

reasons why the subject of

women in the energy sector is

now a hot topic for debate is

skills shortage. The oil and gas

industry is now experiencing a

significant skills gap and many

top level executives have turned

their attention to the fact that

women, who are generally heavily

underrepresented in the industry,

could well be the answer to this

problem. Summits, meetings,

talks, studies, debates have been

organized to tackle this issue and

large international corporations

such as Maersk Oil, Shell,

EnQuest, to name but a few, have

been known to embrace diversity

in the workplace and enhance

opportunities for those involved,

thus taking a very important first

step in overcoming this problem.

The gender issue is not one of

50/50 equal rights and presence;

it is about best people for the

job. Sometimes that means the

swing goes the other way. For

example, 62% of the staff of the Oil

& Gas UK, the organization that

promotes health in the offshore

industry, are women; however,

within groups representing

technical exploration sectors the

number of women is not very high

according to rigzone.com.

BREAKING STEREOTYPESYou might expect in an area

such as training where the

level of quiet respect needed to

allow the desire to learn to be

uncluttered by age bias or gender

prejudice, that the situation is

even harder. But not so in oil

hub Aberdeen where Maersk

Training is meeting the challenge

to encourage women to come

and work in the oil and gas

sector – in Aberdeen one third

of their 12 person instructors’

team is female. Katrina Benton

has been working for Maersk

Training for eighteen months as

a maintenance instructor. As she

is passionate about engineering,

Girls Allowed

21Girls Allowed

a career in oil and gas is

what she feels would be most

appropriate for her in the long

run. Kat feels that pursuing such

a stereotypically male subject is

not easy as a young woman. She

talks about having previously

attempted to break into the

industry stating the ‘it’s hard for

a girl to get an apprenticeship;

it’s very difficult to get into the

industry’. Kat was the second

female instructor working for the

company after Alyson Fairclough

who has been with the company

for the best part of three years.

Since then they have been joined

by another two ladies: Arlene and

Heather.

The most recent recruit, Heather

Exley, has only been a Safety

and Survival Instructor for

Maersk Training for a few weeks.

However, she has been a contract

diver for the company for the best

part of a year. Her apprehension

regarding doing this type of job

initially stemmed from initial

doubts about her self-confidence.

At first, Heather feared that she

‘might not be able to perform as

well in front of a group of people.

She also states ‘I seem to think

that men are better at getting up

in front of people and talking ...

eventually, when I got going, it

was fine but it was just that initial

step.’

SUPPORTIVELouise Wilson is well acquainted

with the world of oil and gas. She

enjoys ‘using her hands and her

mind’ in her line of work which

is why she decided to study

aircraft maintenance engineering

as a university degree. Louise

recently completed an OPITO

BOSIET + MIST course at the

Maersk Training in Aberdeen,

yet she works as an interim

administrator for Maersk

Training in Newcastle. Her view

on working in the industry as a

woman is refreshingly positive

‘It’s fine! The guys are very

supportive and after a while they

tend to become quite paternal,

which is nice.’ She also believes

that Maersk Training is making

a conscious effort to encourage

more women to join this type

of workforce ‘they have been

incredibly supportive. There has

always been Personal Protective

Equipment in the right sizes

which is such a surprise, it’s never

been that way before.’

BACKHANDEDAlrene’s story placed the gender

situation in one of its most

demanding of tests. As a 19

year old in a previous job, she

spent time on the rigs putting

the guys through a strict fitness

programme. She never came

up against any discrimination,

indeed she and her colleagues

felt treated with respect. She did

however mention a minor hiccup.

‘It was only on the helicopter back

home, when there was a rush

for the window and door seats

that the niceties broke down –

it was every man for himself ...

in a backhanded way I suppose

you could put that down as the

ultimate compliment!’

By Alex Bucur

22eSea library To go back in time and access articles from

previous issues, simply click on the photo of the edition.

The numbers in front of the articles is the the eSea issue.

For direct access click on the article title

eSea 1 Instructors’ back to sea programme - Sea Time Reduction announced - Vetting for Supply - New Deepwater Horizons open up

eSea 2New Towmasters’ course gets full simulation treatment - Deepwater course piloted - Wind industry - Drill instructor gets back to the well head

eSea 3MOSAIC II announced - Offshore wind, the new challenges - West African pilots use simulator to deal with the ‘big boys’ - CraneSIM in Vietnam - Piracy through the ages

eSea 4MT launches new website - Chinese in big safety push - Rig crane put in a box - Safety and People Skills build platform emergency course - how to communicate across cultures

eSea 5Maersk Training pennant raised in Dubai - Platform crews pilot Emergency Response course - How to be best in Vetting class - Danger of computer over reliance

eSea 6MOSAIC II, the ground is broken - Rig participants up to elbows in some very special mud - Semi-sub crew learns anchor handling - West African pilots start payback

eSea 7Chinese Container crews look to safety - Rig crane simulator tested - Esbjerg’s new facilities - MOSAIC II update - DP sea-time reduction - Coffee Break with Bent Nielsen

eSea 8Titanic Edition looking back at 100 years of increased safety and improved training - the lifeboat revolution - man overboard - spreading knowledge - tomorrow’s seafarers

eLibrary

eSea 9$15million Phone call - Wrappers off MOSAIC II - 5 Year drilling package - Tomorrow’s leaders today - Family comes too - Learning in luxury - Danish Olympians teambuild

eSea 10Breaking the ice, a new route in navigation - crane simulation arrives - Newcastle’s drop in course for the high life - the silent disease, loneliness - Chinese catch safety bug

To go back in time and access articles from previous issues, simply click on the photo of the edition or use the QR code.









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eSeaM A R I T I M E /O I L & G A S/ W I N D/C R A N E · JA N UA RY 2013

macondo – a lesson unlearnt? the worlds most advanced offshore simulation complex >�

the most socially isolated person on planet earth? >

training to avoid skyfall >

captaining a floating town >

combating stress with underwater rugby >

11










eLibrary












eLibrary




eSea 1

eSea 10

eSea 9

eSea 12

eSea 13

eSea 14

eSea 11

eSea 8

eSea 7

eSea 6

eSea 5

eSea 4

eSea 3

eSea 2

MARITIMEMaritime

1 DP Sea Time Reduction

7 DP Sea Time Reduction

1 Vetting for supply

2 Towmaster course

3 West African pilots’ eye-opener

6 West Africans payback time

10 Ice breaking through world short-cut

11 Captaining a hotel

12 Bridge and engine room in sync

12 A new look at mooring

14 What MLC 2006 means

O&G5 Rig crew responds to an emergency

6 Semi-sub crew handling anchors

9 The $15million phone call

11 Macondo – a lesson unlearnt?

6 Mud course

12 North Sea, experts look to bright future

14 Brazil’s oil and gender revolution

WIND POWER3 Wind industry – new challenges

12 The father of wind power

12 A2Sea’s new windcarrier

12 Olsen team get specific training

13 Training at heights for lady with no

vertigo

14 Blade Runners, the new high level

repairmen

CRANE3 CraneSim in Vietnam

4 Rig crane in a box

7 Rig crane simulator tested

13 APMT’s management improvement

programme

SAFETY4 Container industry in big safety push

7 Chinese container crews show huge

progress

MISCELLANEOUS3 Piracy through the ages

5 Training in Dubai

8 Titanic edition looks at progress since

1912

9 Choosing tomorrow’s leaders

9 Turning a course into a family holiday

10 Loneliness, the problem of isolation

11 Underwater rugby, combating stress

13 The global social media revolution

13 Piracy and the cross - the roll today of the

seamen’s mission

14 The Story of Ngoc – a remarkable tale of

resilience and good fortune

14 Eat meet and leave – the messages in our

diet

eSeaM A R I T I M E / O I L & G A S / W I N D / C R A N E · N O . 1 2 / 2 0 1 3

wind powerWindmills - never ending or beginning >�Poul la Cour. Father of Wind Power >Olsen band crack safe operation >The Floating Table >Bridge and Engine in Sync >Door Knobs to Safety >The North Sea Glory Story > 12


eSeaM A R I T I M E / O I L & G A S / W I N D / C R A N E · N O . 14 / 2 0 1 3

food


Don’t blame the cook >Eat meet and leave >

Triple E = 3M’s >Brazil’s oil and gender revolution >Funny Tummy

So what is the MLC 2006 all about? >Food for Thought >Blade Runners >

Playing the name game >

The Story of Ngoc

Hamburgefintsiv 23

Take the simple snapshot of the small skiff we carried in the last eSea for example. Painted royal blue and with two seven pointed white stars on the bow, the photograph could have remained just that, a grabbed image. But it didn’t. It may be only ten foot long, but the story behind it revealed a wonderful Danish sporting tale which went right to the top of the A.P. Moller - Maersk Group organisation.

Every Boat Tells a Story

23

After the recent October storms

in Denmark Peter Klug-Andersen

went to check on Hr Møller, the

small boat that for the past five

years or so has been his favourite

mode of transport. Tied to the

jetty, it had taken a lot of water on

board, but thankfully there was

no damage.

Having dedicated his craft to the

world’s largest shipping company

and named it in tribute to its

figurehead, you might expect

he had had a long career with

Maersk and light blue blood

flowed through is veins.

But no, a mechanical engineer

and watchmaker, Peter’s love

of water is that of a sportsman.

Now retired after a serious

car accident, his physical

rehabilitation has been largely

through his passion for rowing.

In the rowing season the little

skiff with its outboard motor

chugs him across the sound from

his island home to his rowing

club in Svendborg. It takes seven

minutes, by car he can double,

triple, even quadruple that.

The story goes back to 1981.

Danish rowing had been in the

doldrums in terms of success.

The decision was taken to bring

together the best young talent

and see what happened. It was at

a time when you needed ferries

to get across the country so

everything, especially training,

was difficult.

LIGHT BLUE IS THE COLOUR‘We were just street boys, brought

together. We had no money for

a boat so we hired one from

England,’ said Peter. ‘I was very

nervous because of the boat cost

£10,000 and we didn’t even have

the money to insure it. We had

to keep it its original colour, light

blue.’

Despite all these difficulties the

nine in the boat were good, very

good. They became Scandinavian

champions, but in 1981, product

placement and sponsorship were

still unknown worlds. Then Peter

secured the promise of a film

story on Danish television – he

had 48 hours to find a sponsor

to make the crew look good.

With hours to spare the sweet

manufactures Toms helicoptered

in nine sporting outfits and they

appeared across the nation with

Yankee Bars written on their

chests. It was enough, only just

enough, to get them new oars

and to the world championships

Every Boat Tells a Story 24

The world-beating pale blue boat,

training in 1982 with Maersk

powered blades

25

in Munich. There they turned

chocolate into gold.

A larger than life character

Gudmund Schack, played a

considerable part in Peter’s life,

and indeed in the history of

Denmark and Danish rowing, and

was what we would term today

‘well-connected’. When they

returned with their gold medals

and the light blue boat, Gudmund

immediately suggested seeking

sponsorship ‘from people with

those other blue boats.’ Peter was

invited to Esplanden, A.P. Moller

– Maersk Group’s headquarter in

Copenhagen, the very next day

where at reception he was handed

a cheque. Danish rowing had

turned a corner, in fact the nine

‘street boys’ had triggered what

was to be a sporting revolution.

For the first time the national

rowing team was made up of the

best rowers in the country rather

than just the best club boat.

RAIN SOAKED MESSENGERAt the next world championships

they got silver. As a thank you

Peter cycled through the rain to

Esplanden with a photograph of

the crew and their light blue boat.

At reception this time he was

surprised to find he was expected.

‘I was told that I was to hand the

photograph over personally to

Hr Møller, but I was very wet and

said no. I turned to go back to my

bike but the glass doors had been

closed and then I heard two sets

of footsteps approaching from

behind. Next thing I felt was firm

hands on arms and I was led to

the lift – seconds later the door

opened and there was Hr Møller,’

Peter recalls.

‘We drank coffee and talked for

two hours, arguing about the

unions, but it was not until years

after that I realised what a special

moment the whole experience

had been.’

So years on when Peter was

given the skiff by a neighbour he

dedicated it to that moment. ‘I

didn’t paint it Maersk blue, I think

that would have been too far,’ he

said with a smile.

But maybe not. Recently Peter

was in Copenhagen at the same

time as the second of the Triple

E’s. ‘I went to see it, but it seemed

hopeless to get on board. There

were thousands of people in

queues, and they all had tickets

and time slots. All I had was

the photograph of my boat from

Maersk Training’s magazine,’

he said. ‘I thought, so what,

I’m here, so I went to the office

where they were organising it

and said “I’m the captain of the

smallest Maersk ship, may I see

the largest?” Come this way they

said and led me to the VIP tent.

There in the company of Princess

Benedikte of Denmark, I started

my tour.’

Every boat as they say tells a

story.

And so the blue oar tradition

goes on – last year Peter

organised a boat race on the

Ganges – see if you can spot the

little flash of Maerskness

Every Boat Tells a Story

26

There are two things common to nearly everything in the power industry, two things that it would be hard, nay impossible, to work without. One is man and the other rope and its successors, wire and fibre cables.

Ever since the day after man first

realised that wood could float and

carry him and his goods, the value

of a piece of rope has often been

grossly underrated. That first

sailor was the first to understand

the need for securing his ‘boat’.

Perhaps he used a bit of vine, but

to the uncultured eye whatever

does the job is just a bit of rope, it

may be exceptionally thick bit of

rope, but it is still just rope.

Poul Argon Jensen, pictured right,

doesn’t see it that way and after

ten minutes in his company you

too would never look upon rope,

chains and wires quite the same

way ever again. Poul is sales

manager for Peter Harbro, now

called Certex now part of AxLoad

– whatever name, they are in

rigging and slinging terms, what

Lurpak is to butter.

TUMBLE CLEANIn the forty plus years since

Peter Harbro started mending

and checking nets for Esbjerg

fishermen the industry has

changed beyond recognition.

Peter who is retired now, brought

a precision and exactness to

everything he did so that the

fishermen knew precisely what

they were handling and what it

could do. Today in their Esbjerg

workshops that preciseness

continues, but no longer just for

the fishermen. Anyone being

lifted on or off a rig in a transfer

basket, any crane driver hosting a

container, any supply and anchor-

Science - stronger than steel

26

handling vessel, anyone safety-

strapped onto a wind turbine, will

appreciate the amount of time

and effort that goes into every bit

of rope, chain or webbing.

In the background at the Esbjerg

works there is the distant

rumbling of thousands of chain

links as they bash against each

other in what looks like a huge

tumble drier – but one without

heat, it is only the friction of link

upon link which eventually frees

the rust from the chain. They are

then tested for strength and dipped

in yellow paint, dried and handed

back to Maersk Line for another

four years of work. The whole

complex was part testing bed, part

workshop, part storeroom.

Technology has not by-passed the

offshore power industry, indeed

it has silently transformed it. For

example, it’s light, it’s not metal,

nor natural fibre and it is certainly

not cheap, but Dyneema® is

a synthetic product which is

actually stronger than steel!

The consequences of this Dutch

invention are enormous. For

instance in a mooring situation,

one of the most dangerous of

routine tasks, the risk of death or

maiming from a snap back break

is considerable, with Dyneema®

the snap doesn’t come back as

sharply, with lower lash-back

energy it often simply drops to the

ground or deck.

THE RUSSIAN LINK MAKERIt also floats and this makes it

easier to handle. It was used

recently in the world’s biggest

engineering salvage puzzler, the

re-floating of the Costa Concordia.

As you read this the battered

liner is being held afloat by these

power ropes.

On a smaller scale Poul picked

up a piece of purple webbing,

two centimetres wide it could be

a man’s belt, but this synthetic

strap is made to lift 1000kilos and

won’t break before the pressure

hits at least 7000kilos. It is this

type of technology which is

allowing innovation in the most

unlikely of places. KLM’s cargo

holds are now kept in place by

this lighter webbing, saving

weight and subsequent fuel costs.

In one of the workshops, Oleg

Starkow a former Russian

international ice hockey player is

doing some power pressing. Oleg,

his playing career over before the

end of the Cold War and with no

work in Moscow in the Eighties it

was through a sporting contact

that he arrived in Esbjerg. He’s

been power pressing, making

lashings and webbings ever

since. Some of his workmanship

has found its way to Maersk

Training’s offshore simulator

complex so that participants can

see at first hand those little silent

heroes that keep the offshore

industry working.

Oleg Starkow – the Russian link maker’

Science - stronger than steel 27

Hamburgefintsiv

There are many expressions which come from nautical origins, like to cut and run, to give an wide berth and even the phrase, slush fund but we were wondering where the phrase ‘money for old rope’ came from? There are a number of likely candidates: we chose three.

1 - Rope made from hemp had a

limited lifetime. When it wore

out it was picked apart and

recycled. It was used for caulking.

Rope fibres (known as oakum)

were hammered into the seams

between planks of a ship and hot

pitch was poured over it. This was

done to waterproof the ship. Of

course you got money for the old

rope. The phrase came to mean

money for anything (seemingly)

worthless.

2 - There’s a suggestion that

“money for old rope” dates back

to the days of public executions in

England (hangings). The hangman

was responsible for his rope

and was obliged by law to keep

it. However, macabre souvenir

hunters were willing to pay a

good price for pieces of a used

noose, so the hangman would cut

it up into pieces and sell it, hence

the phrase.

3 - The saying money for old

rope is derived from days in the

workhouse, workers were given

damaged and used rope to pick

into strands, which would then

be re-spun into new rope, they

would earn just enough money for

a meal, hence the saying

‘So which one is the most logical

to you, or do you have a different

story. If so we’d love to hear from

you.’

Money for old rope

28

Hamburgefintsiv

With just about every crane in

northern Europe busy lifting

trees out of peoples’ greenhouses,

there was one busily operating

lifting next to nothing and placing

it next to nowhere. Beside it

side four men in hard hats were

watching and discussing its every

move. In progress was the first

slinging course for banksmen, the

guys on board vessels, rigs and

quays who make sure what goes

up comes down the same safe

way.

For instructor Andrew Monie

it was a reversal of the normal

procedure, the computer screens

were blank, the simulator on

sleep, the classroom empty. The

first Banksman and Slinging

Course had temporarily swapped

the facilities of MOSAIC for a

corner of the car park. As Andrew

explained it is fine to sit and do a

plan for a lift, but it is only when

you put the plan into action that

you see it was the right plan. The

two day course for Viking Supply

was 25% theory, 75% operational,

hence the very big crane.

Slinging in the sunshine

29

Hamburgefintsiv 30

It looks not dissimilar to the Battlefields game, but it is no game, it’s a potential life-saver.

There is some concern in the

maritime industry that the

pressures in time and duties on

board have squeezed fire drill

training down to a level where it

doesn’t really stick in the minds

of seafarers. That’s why the

Danish Maritime Foundation has

All fired up30

31All fired up

backed an initiative from Maersk

Training in creating a program

which is not just a substitute for

drills, but an improvement.

The interactive program allows all

on board to assume their proper

roles and to react independently

to situations created by a ‘host

game master’. It being an internet

based program it also allows for

participants to take part all over

the world.

The program is the result of a

lot of hard work and it itself

required emergency action on

two occasions when the first

two edit houses went bankrupt.

Maersk Training through Søren

Segel had invested a lot of time

and intellectual resources in

it and was determined that a

financial crisis or two was not

going to stop progress. It came to

fruition with Copenhagen-based

Apex, a leading independent game

developer.

There are two main purposes to

the 1.5 million kroner project,

one being to provide a high-end

substitute for drill and secondly

as an add-on to a real CO2 course.

The program was developed

around a tanker vessel where

a fire situation can be created

anywhere on board.

‘What the virtual situation can

create, which drills can’t, is a

virtual fire. Drills can often be

just a run through of equipment,

but here they have very realistic

fires to combat,’ says Søren,

‘and what’s round the corner

is amazing, the guys at Apex

have seen 3D glasses replace

the screens and a trained fire-

fighter instinctively assume a

low position when confronting a

smoke-filled room.’

The current program was tested

out at Maersk Training in

Svendborg with representatives

of the DMF watching a group of

volunteers deal with a fire. The

volunteers were in one room, the

game master and observers in

another – in reality they could be

anywhere in the world.

Hamburgefintsiv

It’s not that it is was a dangerous

place to work, it’s just that

making the workplace saver for

the offshore industry in Esbjerg

meant they had to spill out of the

classroom occasionally for space.

Space is the final frontier and just

around the corner, quite literally,

they’ve found loads of it.

For the third time in three years

they will have a new address. This

time with plenty of body space,

3,000 sq metres of it – they also

have on-site access to probably

the most spacious space to

improve the body – underneath

the office is a huge health club. It’s

so large that, at the same time,

each of the 34 members of staff

Space, the final frontierGone are the days at Maersk Training in Esbjerg when on arrival, if you timed it not quite right, it might have seemed you’d stumbled into a major emergency situation or at the very least were watching a first responder in action. Between you and the reception desk very often there lay a body and a team hard at work placing him on a stretcher with attached piping and electrics.

32

33Space, the final frontier

could work out on a separate

piece of equipment. So it’s not

just the facilities that are new,

participants can expect leaner,

fitter instructors.

FIVE BECOMES FOURTEENIt’s frequently up there at the top

and rarely out of the top three

reasons behind stress – moving,

desk, job or house, moving

anything causes stress. So it

is quite amazing how calm life

was at the premises they shared

happily with AMU for the past

two years.

With the painters hard at work

we asked sales executive Susanne

Bruun Hansen to take us on a tour

...

‘I know it seems a short time but

in two years we really outgrew

ourselves.

We had only five classrooms in

the current building, hence the

overspill into the corridors for

practical training - now we’ll have

14 and of course we retain the

special facilities at the pool.

And we need them we have

about a thousand people a month

coming through our doors for

training.’

Without a desk or chair in sight

the space is deceptively huge,

and it is quite hard to imagine

what they’ll make of it. Susanne

pointed to an area the size of a

snooker table in a room the size of

a tennis court.

‘That’s me in sales.’

POOLED RESOURCES With a training centre like the

one in Esbjerg, the demands on

the building are very broad. Here

participants can do a four hour

OPITO IMIST e-learning course

in a specially designated room

and they can attend conventional

classes but there is also the pool

area which is 150 metres away

where they immerse themselves

in offshore survival skills for

the oil and gas and wind turbine

industries.

‘We have to deal with people for

whom the training day can be

deskbound for a couple of hours,

then surviving a helicopter

ditching, then lunch and then

back to a classroom. It puts

demands, not just on the staff, but

the building – this new complex

has been converted to deal with

these issues.’

The building was a good one

to convert. Newly built for a

communications company it is

consequently very well of for

electronics – wifi problems for

participants will not be an issue.

We have to deal with people for whom the training day can be deskbound for a couple of hours, then surviving a helicopter ditching, then lunch and then back to a classroom.

33

34Poopdeck

Ooops!There was a story recently which

outdid all others in a quiet sort

of way – so quiet you might not

have heard of it, but in the process

it made no more than three or

four people a lot wealthier. This

magazine is read and re-read

in an effort to make sure it is

free from editorial glitches or

grammatical hiccups. We’re not

always successful, but the joy of

being electronic means that any

error, like a hole in the road, can

be tarmacked over.

Anyway no amount of tarmac

could fix the hole in the road

that crept in at the Vatican.

Somebody’s confessional is going

to be a gem. To commemorate

the new pontiff’s first year they

had commissioned 6,000 coins in

gold, silver and bronze. At $203,

$135 and $108 they were already

collector’s pieces and a nice little

earner for the church. One would

assume that they were looked

at on several occasions by the

most critical of eyes, yet not one

35Poopdeck

cardinal’s pupil noticed that Jesus

had been misspelt, Lesus. Can you

imagine the profanity which the

discovery must have triggered,

‘Lesus!’

Now the Vatican are getting

quicker and quicker about

reacting when caught with their

pants down and within days

they had 5,996 or 5,997 of them

back in the pockets, so to speak.

It is worrying that they are not

quite sure; I’m going to check

how many commandments there

are. Anyway that leaves no more

than three or four people with

potentially rare special souvenirs,

ones worth many hundreds of

times their original outlay. It

puts a pressure on the collectors,

depending if they are pious or

profiteers and certainly cuts a

whole new meaning to ‘pennies

from heaven.’

But there’s a marketing gem here.

If they reversed the process it

could be a fantastic pew filler.

Imagine going to church and

putting your hand into a bag,

not to donate but to withdraw a

coin. If the church were to include

a couple of Lesus’s, they’d be

queuing in the aisles.

I say this because on Sunday

morning I was out on a mission

and passing the local chapel

noticed a remarkable lack of cars,

yet when I got to the sports centre

there was not a space to be had.

It didn’t strike me fully until a

runner passed me . . . and then

another and another. In the space

of eight kilometres I counted 17 of

them – fitness is the new religion.

For the next hour I struggled to

get away from these fanatics

because my mission was to find

an isolated spot where I could

recreate on video a scene from

prehistoric times.

It was well-neigh impossible,

people with dogs, lone cyclists

and runners every 500 metres

and in the distance always the old

windmill or light. Being a location

finder is a full-time occupation in

the film industry, one fraught by

constant change and frustration

– ‘I’m sorry but that wind turbine

wasn’t there yesterday.’

Fans of the early westerns have

to ignore the fact that most of

the cowboy and Indian action

takes place around less than half

a dozen geological features – for

a country the size of the States,

there’s one small corner of Utah

that’s seen a disproportionately

disturbing amount of bloodthirsty

action – however maybe not quite

as much as in Midsummer Badger

or wherever Barnaby parks his

car on a Saturday night. Village

population 87, weekly murder

count three. Makes Johannesburg

seem like the Vatican City.

Anyway the point is that no

matter how much you check and

prepare, mistakes will always

appear, even in movies were they

have the huge benefit of using a

current timeline. Take an incident

way back in 2009, put Tom Hanks

in the lead and borrow a vessel

from the same -company as the

hijacked ship and you’d think

nothing could go wrong.

No, somebody I respect on these

matters, a piracy expert who used

to work at Maersk Training, told

me it was surprisingly good, the

Captain Phillips movie, but for

all their planning, he and all the

eagle eyes in Hollywood missed

at least one thing. The US Seals

as they arrive to take over the

situation and the storyline, pull

up in their black 4x4’s. These guys

are the best, so good in fact that

they pay their road tax years in

advance. On the windscreen for

an event set in 2009, is a Virginia

State vehicle inspection sticker

for May 2013. ‘Lesus’ the producer

was heard to mutter.

Hamburgefintsiv 36

ContactEditorial issues and suggestions:Richard Lightbody - [email protected]

Names and emails of those able and eager to help with specific enquiries arising out of this issue

Sales enquiries Aberdeen (UK): [email protected]

Sales enquiries Brazil:[email protected]

Sales enquiries Esbjerg (DK): [email protected]

Sales enquiries India:[email protected]

Sales enquiries Middle East:[email protected]

Sales enquiries Newcastle (UK):[email protected]

Sales enquiries Norway: [email protected]

Sales enquiries Svendborg (DK):[email protected]

Or visit our website www.maersktraining.com

esea 15 - performance enhancement

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