Nuriyya Guliyeva

Family relationships in Asia

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Content

Family notion for AsiansGender role in familiesParentingSibling relationsFamily relationships in different Asian countries.

Asian families include the Chinese, Japanese, Korean, Vietnamese, Cambodian, and Indonesian families. There is remarkable diversity between and within the groups in terms of history, language, and demographic variables (including education, population, income, religion, and occupation). The most pronounced belief in Asian culture, except in Filipino culture, is the Confucian value system. This code of conduct determined relationships an individual had with people and their obligations to them (obey your parents, be a good citizen, take care of your family).

Asians tend to have a large extended family, usually up to three or four generations living together . Nuclear families typically have four to eight children, depending on socioeconomic

status and ethnic group.In Asian cultures, the family is an individual’s religious, economic, political, and social core. It is the first loyalty and primary obligation . The family obligation means that members must

care for each other. For example, grandparents and older siblings care for the young and adult children care for their aging parents. Family relations and functions are clearly and

elaborately defined. Mutual two way obligations connect families, helping them with tasks such as parenting and creating strong bonds.

A Vietnamese proverb says, "The fish which is not preserved in salt will be rotten; the child who does not obey his parents will be corrupted in every way." This proverb explains Asian parents' attitudes toward discipline. In general, "Asian parents are significantly more controlling, restrictive, and protective of their children than are Anglo parents" 

 Asian children are taught early in life about the importance of relationships and obligations within the family and society. As children mature, they

develop a moral obligation and primary loyalty to the family. Parents teach children to do things that enhance the family name.

 Most Asian parents want their children to receive a good education, although this has traditionally been more true for sons than for daughters. When children complete degree programs, they gain respect, not only for themselves, but for the whole family. The practice of ancestor worship and

the respect given to tradition and history all reflect the value associated with wisdom.

The traditional family is structured by age and gender. Males are usually dominant and authoritarian. The father IS considered to be superior in all matters. Communication from father to mother and parents to children tends to be one way and top down. When parents speak, children are expected to listen without questioning. Any questioning or "talking back" is considered disrespectful. The father does not usually start a conversation with his children. He tends to be distant, so when he does intervene, he is more effective in controlling children's misbehavior.

Women in traditional Asian cultures are considered subordinate. A girl is taught to obey her father; when she marries, she is taught to obey her husband; and when she has children, she is taught to obey her eldest son in case of her husband's death. She has a more subtle authority with her children, and often mediates between children and their father. Because of her less punitive parenting approach, her relationship with her children is often closer.

Traditionally, girls and boys have different roles and are treated differently in Asian cultures. In traditional villages, girls care for younger siblings, in addition to helping with household chores. Child care responsibilities are an important factor in keeping girls from attending school. Boys, in contrast, "play and hunt for birds and other animals" Cambodian boys are just as likely as girls to be responsible for younger siblings. Education was considered more important for boys until recent years.

Chinese familyTraditional Chinese family roles are governed by prescribed roles defined by hierarchy, obligation, and duty. The family is thought of as a collective unit and an individualistic perspective is seen as disruptive and disrespectful to the family. Marriages are commonly arranged and spousal relationships are secondary to parent-child relationships. Males within the Chinese culture are dominant and fathers handle familial disciplinarian responsibilities. On the other hand, women are affectionate, self-sacrificing, and caring as mothers; taught to assist with household responsibilities as daughters; and adhere to the thrice-obeying rule (comply with fathers/eldest brother in youth, husbands in marriage, and sons when widowed) as wives .

Japanese families. Like many other Asian cultures, the Japanese family assigns responsibility according to gender. Women are considered the transmitters of tradition and handle most housework and childcare. Men, on the other hand, provide financially for the family.The Japanese are encouraged to think first of being part of a group. In other words, one is never fully independent; therefore, one must always be conscious of others.

Vietnamese families. China has long influenced Vietnamese culture. Vietnam adopted Chinese Confucianism enthusiastically, and this code of conduct governed its society for centuries. Like many other Asian cultures, Vietnamese hold elders in high regard and respect their position in the family. Both adults and children are taught to remain quiet when in the midst of elders and to listen with great intent. Eye contact is seen as disrespectful and shaking hands with both hands is expected.In most Vietnamese families rules of etiquette were followed. Couples wed through parental arrangement or by their own initiative. Once married, the union is considered permanent unless the woman committed adultery. In traditional Vietnamese families, the husband is the head of the family, chief financial provider, and the rest of the family looks to him for guidance. The wife is the caregiver and comforter of the family and only deals with the outside community by choice .

Cambodian families. Cambodian people are a racial mix of indigenous tribal people and people who came during the invasion from India and Indonesia in 1970. Unlike many of the neighboring countries, the majority of the people are Buddhists with a small Muslim following. The Cambodian family is based on close relationships. Central values within the Cambodian family are built around harmony and balance.The husband is considered the head of the household and expects to be consulted at all times prior to decision making. Women in Cambodian culture hold stereotypical gender roles within the family.

Indonesian family

Indonesian families. Indonesia is one of the largest Muslim nations with over 90 % of its people reporting it as their primary religion. There are over 100 distinct groups in Indonesia, each with its own cultural identity related to language, class, custom, and value. In the Indonesian family, family closeness and loyalty, obligation, and respect for parents is important.Indonesian culture recognizes the responsibility of the male to be the economic provider for the family. Muslim men in Indonesia may have up to four wives, but few do, because the husband must secure the permission from previous wives and treat each equally.Women are taught to respect their husbands and are the primary caretakers of the family; women are responsible for domestic maintenance. Children are taught to obey and respect both parents. It is also common for children to remain in the homes of their parents for extended lengths of time. In fact, it has been reported that most young Indonesian individuals live with either their parents or extended family until they marry.

Korean families. Korean families are hierarchical by gender, generation, age, and class. There is differentiation by gender and men and women have traditional gender roles. Parents support children and children are obligated to respect their parents.Marriage is considered a union among families rather than individuals. Prior to marriage, the family's community standing, as well as the specific credentials of the family members, is considered.

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