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I am ambitious, talented, and intelligent, but I lack

willpower, discipline, and organisation. I am an

impulsive procrastinator of the highest order.

What can I do?

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Anvy Shetty, a student of life

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I've been in this exact situation.

I have always had big ambitions and goals and clear direction, but I used to lack

everything else that would get me there. I used to play a lot of video games, watch

TV for hours and prefer just doing nothing to what I should be doing. I'd feel guilty

about being lazy but the guilt was never enough to stop my bad habits.

Today, I hardly watch any TV and I never just sit around. I utilise every second I

can to reach my goals.

It only took me about six months to get to this level of productivity from how I used

to be.

What you need to develop is a drive, and the thing that jump starts a drive is

passion. You need to be as passionate about your goals as you can be. You say thatyou're ambitious, so what exactly are your ambitions? Do you have a clear goal that

you want to achieve?

And the big question, How much do you want it?

This is the thing that I couldn't answer well before. I wanted it, but how much?

More than I wanted to relax, more than I wanted to sleep, more than I wanted that

instant gratification? At the time, as much as I didn't want to admit it, the answer

was no.

So, instead of reading self-help books (that I was too lazy to read anyway) or

repeating positive affirmations, or taking practical action straight away, I started

with something much simpler: I focused on my goal. In my own head, I began

questioning myself, asking myself if I really wanted it. And I also began visualising

the worst case scenario. What if I went through life and never made anything

significant of myself? I believed myself to be talented; what if I let all those talents

go to waste? What if I die with nothing to my name, no success, no recognition, no

respect? All those outcomes absolutely terrified me (and they still do). And as they

say "fear is the greatest motivator".

From the moment I realised that those outcomes terrified me, they would constantly

be on my mind. And they grew. They grew into an overwhelming need to do

something, right now. They became a source of very strong motivation. I would

spend my whole eight hour work day thinking, questioning and imagining and

leave work feeling so pumped to start my "real" work. At first those feelings of

motivation didn't last very long and I would slip back into something lazy after

being productive for a short while, but the thoughts were never far away, and theynever failed to motivate me again. Over time those periods of motivation and

productivity grew and grew and now I feel like I could be productive every minute

of the day.

Looking back on how I was six months ago, I realise I am still very much the same

Shana Tiang, Composer and Chronic Ponderer

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Updated Tue.

person. I'm just as tired, just as ready to relax and just as in love with playing video

games, but none of those things matter to me anymore as much as my goal does.

Picture your worst case scenario. How do you feel about dying the way you are

now, lacking willpower and discipline? That you describe yourself as a "rubbish

human" tells me that you hate your current mindset. The only way to get out of it is

to do something. Every second you work away from the person you are now, you

become closer to the person you want to be. The mind is a powerful thing and it

can push you. I guarantee that if you want something enough, you will work to get

it. The first step is just realising how much.

"Breaking: You Don't Lack WillPower, You Lack Balls!!!"

You are not a rubbish human being... Stop calling yourself that. What you're really

trying to say is that you're sh*t. Have the balls to call yourself sh*t when you feel

like sh*t.

Last year I was depressed. I couldn't do anything that I wanted to do. I would try

something for a while then give up, and make excuses that I don't have enough will

power.

The more I failed, the worse I felt. The worse I felt, the less I wanted to do

anything, or try anything. This was a vicious cycle that I got stuck in.

Until one day I got slapped on the face by a hot girl. It wasn't a literal slap, a

metaphorical one. She told me I didn't have any balls to do anything and that's why

I was where I was.

"You don't lack willpower. You lack balls." She said

I don't have to tell you much mo re... but just by looking at your question I can tellthat you don't have balls either. You'd see it too if a hot girl slapped you in the face.

If you want to discover the secret of how to overcome your procrastinating without

being slapped on the face keep reading... (As a bonus, I'll also tell you how to find

bigger b alls.)

Here's what you can do to stop procrastinating and get some will power to do the

things that you want to do, have the relationships that you're looking for, and gain

the love and respect of your friends and family.

If you follow the steps in this answer you will quickly achieve the things that you

want to achieve. You will gain power over your colleagues, your boss will give you

the credit for things that you do.

But that's not all, your family will become proud of you, and your friends will

follow you where ever you want to lead them. Finally, you will gain the love of

your life and the respect you've always deserved.

If you don't follow the steps mentioned in this post you will keep doing what

you've been doing and keep getting the results that you've always gotten .

You will lose the respect of your friends and family, you will be overlooked for

promotions, and your boss and colleagues will overlook you for important project.

Finally your family will treat you like a child who has no control over himself and

your friends will treat you like a loser, and stop inviting you to parties.

So here's how you stop procrastinating and get control on your willpower.

The Lie About 'A Lack Of Will Power'

If you're unable to do something, most people will tell you that you lack will power.

RyzVan Rashid, Love life and everything with it.

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Downvote Comments 4+ 3

That's a lie.

The next time some one says that, walk away from them, and never talk to them

again.

This is a big lie. There is no suck thing as a "lack" of will power.

Before you get more about how to take control of your will power, or get more will

power you have to understand

What Is Will Power?

The highest form of energy each of us get is 'will power'. This is the energy that

gets produced in your mind every day. You get very little of this energy every day.

This is a finite amount of energy that you get.

Just like there are 24 hours in a day and every one gets the same amount of time.

There is a certain amount of will power that each of us gets each day.

You can chose to spend this energy any way you like, or not spend it at all. But at

the end of the day the energy of will power will become zero.

Just like in the morning you have 24 hours. As the day keeps going on the time you

have left in that day finishes, so does the energy in will power.

You have the highest amount of willpower when you wake up, and it goes down as

the day runs on.

Now you can spend your 24 hours doing different things, watch tv, play a sport,

learn a skill, hang out with friends. The more amount of time you spend doing one

task the better you will get at that - and the worse you will get at everything else.

Just like that, will power is a finite amount and you can choose to spend this ...

(more)

92Upvote Share

Written 16 Apr.

Downvote Comment

Procrastination is hard to overcome. The best 'hack' I know is to make y ourself just

do a little piece of the whole. Surprisingly often, this switches me from avoiding a

task to doing it.

And after you've finished something that seemed nasty, dull, or difficult, tell

yourself, "That wasn't nearly as unpleasant as I thought." Maybe that will help next

time.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go finish my taxes.

Ed Caruthers, Retired physicist and technolo... (more)

31 upvotes by Mahesh Kay, Sobia Hussain, Ramesh Kaika, (more)

31Upvote Share

I certainly can relate, my personal journey has been 30+ years in the making, still

working on it!

I truly dig Socrates' bold statement that "The unexamined life is not worth living."

He doesn't mince words. He doesn't say that the unexamined life is "less

meaningful than it could be" or "one of many possible responses to human

existence." He simply and clearly says it's not even worth living. This is a strong,

unequivocal statement!

Socrates believed that the purpose of human life was personal and spiritual growth.

We are unable to grow toward greater understanding of our true nature unless we

take the time to examine and reflect upon our life. As George Santayana, observed,

"He who does not remember the past is condemned to repeat it."

James Wise, Aman Atakey Bored

14 upvotes by Jessica Brantley, Ender Bozkurt, Nilay Mehta, (more)

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Written 6 Sep.

Downvote Comments 2

Examining our life reveals patterns of behavior. Deeper contemplation yields

understanding of the subconscious programming, the powerful mental software that

runs our life. Unless we become aware of these patterns, much of our life is

unconscious repetition. The GREAT news for you, my electronic friend, is that you

are in the very process of doing just that! You are on your way! Kudos, but please

realize this process is never completed, the key for us is to Manage that process and

not let tangential thought preclude us from the overarching goals we have set.

What you appear to lack is focus, I recognize it because I myself grapple with

it...DAILY, moment by moment. Staying on task requires focus. Some are great atfocusing on the "big picture" while others are much more prone to myopia. The

very best of us can prioritize the myopic tasks within the framework of the "big

picture".

You are primarily dealing with time management issues. As a Project or Program

Manager for decade-long endeavors I have learned that by establishing Goals,

Milestones, and Tracking true progress, it is easier to maintain focus. The trick here

is that you will likely need to adjust these (even the top tier Goals) as you go along.

Those changes need to be Warranted, not just a whim of any one moment. I realize

the benefit of sharing my goals with others, those whom I allow to hold me into

account regarding my endeavors, we are all undeniably social animals, by nature

and by nurture.

Consider my points herein and use what you can, throw away the rest. Focus!

Avoid distractions, the key here is recognizing that you are being distracted from

your set goals. Unfortunately for most of us, this is much easier said than done.

Don't give up. Each time you catch yourself wandering from a task you have

decided is a premise to reach your conclusion you are making progress.

My advice is not to focus on what you will feel like "dying the way you are" but

rather living the way you want to be. And please don't be so hard on yourself, I

have met and interacted with hundreds of thousands of people in my lifetime and

not a single one of them do I consider "rubbish".

Good luck, those who seek answers, are the only ones who find them!

14Upvote Share

If it's so, then all are born rubbish. But they c hoose to differ .

And so are you doing right now. The very fact that you are asking this question

indicates that IFF you are able to navigate to the other side, you should be highly

successful. If you manage to get the upthrust successfully, you will keep on flying.

BUT

if this situation continues, you will automatically start going down in life. You

know, if you ain't progressing, you are regressing automatically.

WHAT TO DO?

Look, I believe that motivation or advises from others seldom work for anyone. We

ask Bill Gates the Secret of HIS Success, not for the Secret of Success he adopted,

right?

The people who are or will be successful, will always be self motivated.

AND SELF MOTIVATION MEANS THE ABILITY OF FORMATTING YOUR

LAPTOP IF THE SITCOM IS KILLING YOUR TIME.

Look, start breathing deep and slowly, that'll reduce the impulsive attitude. Then,

try working hard no matter what for a week, and trust me, when you'll see the

brighter side of toiling, you will get addict to it.

And remember, wasting anymore days thinking to switch the attitudes from the

present unproductive to highly successful and confident one will be a kind of

procrastination in itself. SO BEGIN NOW.

Anonymous

7 upvotes by Manish Jain, Curious Visa, Shafaq Maalik, (more)

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Written 10 Sep.

Downvote Comment

EDIT:

You cannot always do what you love. But you still need to love what you do.

7Upvote Share

Written 14 Jul.

Downvote Comment 1 1

Been there, done that...

This is what worked for me. After getting roaster from work, I normally on Sunday

evenings make a detailed timetable for the rest of my week,eg what time to wake

up, what time to do cardio, what time to do weight training, what time to read a

book, what time to do other things etc. And I have that page up on my wall, which

reminds me of that I have limited time to get loads done . Also when I wake up I

read it twice in the morning with my cup of coffee, which again reaffirms my goal

for the day and life in general. You might say its robotic, but I'm happy it gave me

a sense of direction, a headstart and I am becoming a better version of myself. Even

though I work about 55 hours a week upwards, (and no it is not an office job sitting

on a chair in front of a computer). I have sticken to it, missing only twice or so. I

read a book called "The monk who sold his Ferrari" (highly highly recommended)

in which there is a chapter where the hero, if you will, tells his friend about this 21

day rule, which is, if you do something for 21 days it becomes a habbit. Oh, and

motivation is bullshit, sorry had to say this. It's commitment that's more important.

Motivation will die or wither off within a month, two months or 6 months(doesn'ttake that long usually) but with this 21 day rule, which in turn becomes a habbit,

and commitment is the key that can also help you become a better version of

yourself.

Abhishek Rohewal

7 upvotes by Jaime Goulet, Jab Dov, Zaryaab Khonde, (more)

7Upvote Share

Anvy Shetty, a student of life

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