kane & k endall counties free - orange peel gazette

June 17, 2020 Readers are Leaders. . . Volume 14, Issue 19

FREETAKE ONE

If you are age 7 - 107. . . Enjoy Your FREE Copy Of The Orange Peel Gazette

Amusing Stories • Jokes • Puzzles • TriviaCommunity Events and Coupons

Distribution on the 1st & 3rd Wednesday of each monthFor Advertising: Michelle Brokop (815)751-1286 Email: [email protected]

Download your FREE copy today at: www.OrangePeelGazetteKaneCo.com

““TT hhee HH aapp pp iiee ss tt LL ii tt tt ll ee PPaa pp eerr IInn TToowwnn ””KANE & KENDALL COUNTIES

AcceptingE SCRAP

• Aluminum • Brass • Copper • Stainless Steel • Steel • Iron• Insulated Wire • Batteries • Aluminum Cans• Siding 336 East Sullivan •Aurora

M - F 7:30 - 4:30Sat 7:00 - 12:30

STATE CERTIFIED SCALESCONTAINER & TRUCKING SERVICES

TOP CASH PAID for

Ferrous & Non-Ferrous

Metals

Ecology Tech Inc

630-844-3344www.ssmetalrecyclers2.com

1 Block E. of Rt 25 on Sullivan

Since 1988

Mulch SpecialistsFast, Accurate Service

46w640 Big Timber Rd • Hampshire

Visit us online at

847-683-1013

www.BeansFarm.com

WEBER GRILLS IN STOCK!

630-345-0044www.safeguardsealcoat .com

AASSPPHH AALLTT PPAAVVIINNGGSSEE AALLCCOOAATTIINNGG

CC RRAACCKK FFIILLLLIINNGGSS TTRRIIPPIINNGG

Driveway Special$100 Off

any newAsphalt Driveway

5% OffAll SealcoatingJobs Booked byJuly 31, 2020

Expires 7/31/2020 Expires 7/31/2020

- - - -

- -

Knock, Knock!Who’s There?

Orange!Orange Who?Orange you glad

we’re back!

OORANGERANGE PPEELEEL GGAZETTEAZETTE

antiques • Furniture • ToolsBuy & Sell • almost anything of Value

Schomer’S Trading PoST

630-859-1177 • 169 S. Lake St (rt 31) • aurora

Vintage, unique, or just different. You never know what treasure you may find...

Schomer’S Trading PoST

Personalized Plate While waiting in line at the

Department of Motor Vehicle Services for my personalized license plate, I heard the clerk shout out, "E I E I O."

"I'm here," the woman standing next to me answered. Curious, I asked if she was a farmer or maybe taught kindergarten.

"Neither," she replied. "My name is McDonald."

· Kitchenette with full-size refrigerator, Microwave and coffee machine in each room!

· Free Parking · Free Internet/WiFi· Free Cable TV

201 Smoke Tree Lane N. Aurora, IL • (I-88 Exit IL-31)

(331)205-1700

Weekly & Contractor Ratesavailable

ReserveTODAY

July issues of the Orange Peel Gazette

will be distributed on

July 8 and July 22

TELL OUR ADVERTISERS, “I SAW YOU IN THE ORANGE PEEL GAZETTE.”

Want to appear in the next issue of the

ORANGE PEEL GAZETTECall Today! (815)751-1286

ORANGE PEEL GAZETTE - KANE & NORTHERN KENDALL COUNTIESCHECK OUT OUR WEBSITE... WWW.ORANGEPEELGAZETTEKANECO.COM • PAGE 2

CURTISTOWING INC.

WE PAY CASH

ON THE SPOT!

7 DAYS A WEEK

24 Hrs 24 Hrs

WE BUY JUNK CARS WE BUY JUNK CARS FOR CASHFOR CASH

Any Condition • Running or Not • No Title - No ProblemAny Condition • Running or Not • No Title - No ProblemWe Come to You • Free Towing • Same Day Pick-upWe Come to You • Free Towing • Same Day Pick-up

(630)817-3577(630)817-3577

CCUURRTTIISS

Naperville www.CurtisTowingAndSalvage.com Aurora

Call Today! 630-262-8484

630-262-848409/30/19

09/30/1909/30/19

Expires 09/30/19

Perfume The young man says to his date, "I really like the

perfume you're wearing. What's it called?" The young lady looks puzzled for a minute then

searches through her purse, finally dumping the contents on the table between them. She searchesthrough the pile and finally finds a small spray bottle.She examines the label and announces, "Here it is ...'Unforgettable'."

Ladies, you can tell a lot about a man by how dogs react to him. For example, if the police

K9 is biting him, he may not be ideal.

Professional Photographer People don't like to look dumpy in their own

photos, which is why a local professional photographer gets a lot of requests asking him to retouch photos. You know, erase the crow's-feet, lopoff the 'love handles' -- that sort of thing.

Therefore, he wasn't surprised when one woman,pointing to a family portrait, asked him, "Can youtake thirty pounds off me?" until she added, "and putit on my sister?"

Expires 7/31/20

Expires 7/31/20Expires 7/31/20

Expires 7/31/20

FOR ADVERTISING, CALL MICHELLE AT (815)751-1286

ORANGE PEEL GAZETTE - KANE & NORTHERN KENDALL COUNTIESGREAT RATES - GREAT RESULTS - CALL TODAY! (815)751-1286 • PAGE 3

VV II NN NN YY ’’ SS PP LL UU MM BB II NN GG

No Job Too Small!

• Main Lines • Power Rodding • Hot Water Heater • New Construction

• Bathroom Remodeling • Frozen Pipes • Faucets

• Garbage Disposals

Licensed & Bonded 058-176546

Call Us For All Your Plumbing Needs

66 33 00 -- 33 99 22 -- 00 44 22 99

Feel better the natural way!@]upun]tur_

\y Lin^[

663300--448888--66224433132 N. Main St • Elburnacupuncturebylinda.com

Linda A. OsterLicensed Acupuncturist

Oriental Medicine

Complete Junk Removal Complete Junk Removal & Light Demolition Services& Light Demolition Services

WE’LL REMOVE ANYTHING!WE’LL REMOVE ANYTHING!Basements • Entire Estates Garages • Attics • Sheds

Furniture • Appliances • PoolsConstruction Debris

877-545-0710877-545-0710www.AAAAmericanCleanouts.com

495 North Lake Street • Aurora, IL630.896.5031 www.plumlanding.org

Independent Living Studio & 1 bedroom Apartments

Family Feeling Facility • Delicious Meals • Beautiful Views

Avoiding A Big ObjectDriving to work, a gentleman had to swerve to

avoid a box that fell out of a truck in front of him. Seconds later, a policeman pulled him over for reckless driving. Fortunately, another officer had seenthe carton in the road. The policemen stopped trafficand recovered the box. It was found to contain largeupholstery tacks.

"I'm sorry sir," the first trooper told the driver, "but I am still going to have to write you a ticket."

Amazed, the driver asked for what. The trooper replied, "Tacks evasion."

Observations From Grandma!Remember: Old folks are worth a fortune, with

silver in their hair, gold in their teeth, stones in theirkidneys, lead in their feet and gas in their stomachs.

I have become a little older since I saw you last and a few changes have come into my life.

Frankly, I have become a frivolous old gal. I amseeing five gentlemen everyday! As soon as I wakeup, Will Power helps me get out of bed. Then I go see John. Then Charlie Horse comes along; and whenhe is here, he takes a lot of my time and attention.

When he leaves, Arthur Ritis shows and stays therest of the day. He doesn’t like to stay in one placevery long, so he takes me from joint-to-joint. Aftersuch a busy day, I’m really tired and glad to go to bedwith Ben Gay. What a life!P.S. The preacher came to call the other day. He saidat my age I should be thinking about the hereafter. Itold him, “Oh, I do all the time. No matter where I am,in the parlor, upstairs, in the kitchen, or down in thebasement, I ask myself, “What am I here after?”

I came, I saw, I forgot what I was doing,

retraced my steps, got distracted on my way back,

have no idea what’s going on and now I have to pee.

Se Habla Español

24/7 SAME DAy SERVICE

www.JJgaragedoor.com (224)217-1631

• Steel & Wood Doors • Remotes/Operators•Springs/Rollers/Cables/Tracks

SALES - SERVICE - INSTALLATION On All Makes & Models

Residential & Commercial

•Free Estimates •Insured •Warranty

AGOODLAUGH

RECHARGESYOUR

BATTERIES

ORANGE PEEL GAZETTE - KANE & NORTHERN KENDALL COUNTIESLike us on Facebook for past issues & more fun stories...OrangePeelGazetteKaneCo • PAGE 4

THANK THE BUSINESS WHERE YOU PICKED UP THE ORANGE PEEL GAZETTE

Free deLiVerY within illinois

Sildenafil(generic Viagra)

30 tabs - $60

847-683-2244 * prescription required*Tadalafil

(generic Cialis)30 tabs - $90 All

Strengths

Matt Gavin16119 Chicago Road Sandwich, IL 60548

Cel (815) 405-9988Fax (815) 786-2296

Gavin Woodworking, Inc.Furniture Refinishing - Repairing

Special Wood Products - Chair CaningGeneral Machining - General Painting

ANTIQUE - CLASSIC - SPECIAL INTEREST AUTOS

Old Coach Works Restoration

Whether it’s a reliable driver or a Concours Grand Champion

Repair - Update - Modify - RestoreWe Are Here To Help You Finish Your Project!

(630)553-0414 www.oldcoachworks.com

Your AdHere!

Call Today! 815-751-1286

Lost Cell Phone My wife called me after driving to an appoint-

ment. She arrived and I could tell from her voicethat she was getting frustrated. Finally she said, "Iknow I had my cell phone with me. And now I can'tfind it!"

I replied, "Aren't you talking on it?" There was a solid period of stunned silence as

the reality of the situation sank in, followed by,"You are NOT going to tell anybody about this!"

Why Do I Exercise?Why Do I Exercise? ‘Tain’t no mystery --

wanna have a good medical history.Doctor told me exercise is great --helps them blood cells circulate.

Great for the lungs, great for the ticker,can’t nothin getcha in better shape quicker.

Feels so healthy, feels so sweet,pumpin my arms and flappin’ my feet,moldin’ my muscles, firmin’ my form,

pantin’ like a pack mule, sweatin’ up a storm.

Keeps me youthful, keeps me loose,tightens my tummy and shrinks my caboose.

Beats bein’ sluggish, beats being lazy --Why DO I exercise?... Maybe I’m crazy!

Golfer Gets A Lesson!A hack golfer spends a day at a plush country club,

playing golf and enjoying the luxury of a complimentary caddy. Being a hack golfer, he playspoorly all day.

Round about the 18th hole, he spots a lake off tothe left of the fairway. He looks at the caddy andsays, “I’ve played so poorly all day, I think I’m goingto go drown myself in that lake.”

The caddy looks back at him and says, “It won’twork. I’m sure that you can’t keep your head downthat long.”

ORANGE PEEL GAZETTE - KANE & NORTHERN KENDALL COUNTIESGREAT RATES - GREAT RESULTS - CALL TODAY! (815)751-1286 • PAGE 5


On th_ Fl[m\_[u Riv_r15 mil_s W. of Fifi_l^, WI off Hwy 70

• Bar • Restaurant• Cabin Rentals • Shower House

• Canoe Rentals • Shuttle Service• ATV/Snowmobile Trail Access

WE SELL NON-ETHANOLPREMIUM GASOLINE

(715) 762-4786 • 6275 N Oxbo Dr • Park Falls, WI RESORT www.theoxboresort.com

Painted Shut?

Weights Dropped?

(847)697-1974

Call Mark

WINDOWROPER R

opes Torn?Pu

lley’s

Stu

ck?

HANDYMAN SERVICES

Call Sonnie630-465-4437

FREE ESTIMATES • REFERENCES UPON REQUEST

Experienced in all Home Improvements

No Job Too Small

10% OFFNew Customers

www.ClaessonCarpetCleaning.comInsured/Bonded • Elburn, IL • Family Owned/Operated

Residential - Commercial

Serving Kane & DeKalb counties for over 24 years!

yes, we can CLEAN that for you!

(630) 365-2099

ClaessonCarpet Cleaning

Carpet • Furniture • Area Rugs Water in the Basement

A Leisurely DriveTwo elderly women were out driving in a large car.

Both could barely see over the dashboard. As theywere cruising along they came to an intersection. Thestoplight was red but they just went on through.

The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself,“I must be losing my mind, I swear we went through ared light.”

After a few more minutes they came to another inintersection and the light was red again, and again theywent right through. This time the woman in the passenger seat was almost sure that the light was red,but was really concerned that she could be mistaken.

She was getting nervous and decided to pay veryclose attention to the road and the next intersection tosee what was going on.

At the next intersection, sure enough, the light wasdefinitely red and they went right through. She turnedto the woman behind the wheel and said, “Mildred!Did you know we just ran through three red lights in arow! You could have killed us!”

Mildred turned to her companion and said, “Oh!Am I driving?”

GolfThe bride came down the aisle and when she

reached the altar, the groom was standing there withhis golf bag and clubs by his side.

She said, "What are your golf clubs doing here?"He looked her right in the eye--and said, "This isn't

going to take all day, is it?"

Plasma Biological ServicesEarn Over $400 This Month

by Donating Plasma!!

• Donating Plasma is a Safe and Easy Way to Earn Money

• Your Plasma is Used in Products That Help Save Lives

• No Need for an Appointment Walk-ins are Welcome

• Additional Bonuses for Students IDs and Frequency

We are Open 6 Days a Week for Your Convenience Call for more information (847)531-8185

Mon-Thurs 7am - 6pm • Fri 7am - 5pm • Sat 8am - 4pm

1166 N. McLean Blvd.Elgin, IL 60123

Phone: 847-531-8185Located Just North of Big Timber Road

SSPRINGPRING CCLEANLEAN UUPP

630-639-3639630-639-3639MAINTENANCE & LANDSCAPING

Free Estimates Fully Insured

Vidal (630)877-8691

•Tree Pruning • Sod/Mulch Install• Lawn Mowing• Brick Paving • Stump Grinding•Tree Planting/Removal


The Orange Peel Gazette is distributed throughout Kane & Kendall Counties including various...

All Answers Can Be Found Throughout The Ads

Appearing In This Issue Of The ORANGE PEEL GAZETTE

ACROSS2. Whole house _____ & Furnace

Cleaning4. Vinny's _____6. harveygoodwin@_____.com7. Deep _____ & Traditional9. www.StateStreet_____shop.com11. www.Aurora_____.com

DOWN1. you never know what _____ you

may find.3. Sell your antique car on _____4. your _____ is used in products that

help save lives.5. We pay _____ on the spot8. servicenow_____ services.com10. yes, we can _____ that for you!

Marie DeMaria Real Estate Broker

Trust... Service...Priceless!

EXCELS

663300--556677--33330000

630.538.9592Call Mikki

40 Terry Dr • Sugar Grove, IL AMAZINGMASSAGE.NET

AMAZING!MASSAGE

Salon • Spa • Lash Studio

815-748-5887

Schedule your consultation with Stephanie today!OPEN and ready to serve you!

327 E. Hillcrest • DeKalbStephanie Brokop

Alone we can do so little; together we can do so much

- - Helen Keller



With a minimumpurchase of $10

(before taxes) receive

$1 OFF* $15 $5 OFF* $40 $2 OFF* $25 $10 OFF* $55

*Not to be used with any other offer.

1700 S. Douglas RdMontgomery • 630-892-1100

$5 Match Play Gaming Coupon

(1) per customer, per visitNot to be used with any other offer.

OPEN FOR DINE-IN STARTINGJUNE 26

Family Restaurant

111 N. Main Street

Federally Licensed Firearm Dealer • Transfers with Ease

We Buy & Sell FirearmsSafe • Discreet • Convenient • Fair

Free Appraisals

Route 47 • Elburn • www.kanecountycoins.com

Kane County Coins630-365-9700630-365-9700

Inherited an old gun & not sure what to do with it . .

Let Us Help!

Window Glass - Plastic Sheets - ScreensAluminum Store Fronts & DoorsDefective & Broken Insulated

Glass ReplacementMirrors Made To Order - Table Tops

939 Montgomery Ave • Aurora630-801-1230 • www.mrtouchofglass.com

Licensed - Insured Bonded

20% Offwith this original coupon. No discount on

labor. Must mention coupon before ordering.Not valid with other offers. No copies or internet reprints. Expires 7/30/2020

MaterialOnly

20 YearCelebration

IT PAYS TOSWITCH.

10998778

Harvey A. Goodwin630-585-7077

1649 Montgomery Rd., Ste. 10Aurora, IL 60504

[email protected]

Drivers who switched to Allstate saved an average of $356 a year. Call me today.

Savings based on national customer reported data for new policies written in 2016. Actual savings vary. Discounts subject to terms, conditions and availability. Allstate Fire & Casualty Ins. Co., Allstate Vehicle & Property Ins. Co., Allstate Property & Casualty Ins. Co. & affiliates: 2775 Sanders Rd. Northbrook, IL

60062. © 2019 Allstate Insurance Co.

A Smile :-)Smiling is infectious

You catch it like the flu, When somone smiled at me today,

I started smiling too.I passed around the corner

and someone saw my grin,When he smiled I realized

I’d passed it on to him.I thought about that smilethen I realized its worth,A single smile like mine

could travel around the earth.So if you feel a smile begin

don’t leave it undetected.Let’s start an epidemic quick,

and get the world infected!Keep this smile going,

by passing it on to a friend.Because everyone needs a smile,

To be happy in the End!

A Really Bad PunA bill collector knocked on the door of a country

debtor. "Is Fred home?" he asked the woman who an-swered the door.

"Sorry," the woman replied. "Fred's gone for cotton."

The next day the collector tried again. "Is Fred heretoday?"

"No, sir," she said, "I'm afraid Fred has gone forcotton."

When he returned the third day he sarcastically said,"I suppose Fred is gone for cotton again,?"

"No," the woman answered solemnly, "Fred diedyesterday."

Suspicious that he was being avoided, the collector decided to wait a week and investigate thecemetery himself. But sure enough, there was poorFred's tombstone, with this inscription: ... "Gone, ButNot for Cotton."

Angvick Antique Motors

(847)287-4413 • Oldmotorsguy.com [email protected]• PO Box 7 • Burlington, IL 60109

Specializing in vehicles manufactured prior to 1940BUy • SELL • RESTORE • REPAIR

• BUY YOUR ANTIQUE CAR• SELL YOUR ANTIQUE CAR

ON CONSIGNMENT• REPAIR YOUR ANTIQUE CAR• RESTORE YOUR ANTIQUE CAR


ORANGE PEEL GAZETTE - KANE & NORTHERN KENDALL COUNTIESCONNECTING CUSTOMERS AND BUSINESSES. . .THAT’S WHAT WE DO BEST! • PAGE 8

(815) 827-3051

210 MAIN STREET • MAPLE PARK

PEG’S ON MAIN

~ Visit our Gift Shop ~for Cards, Home Decor & Gifts Galore

Full Service Hair Salon for Men & Woman

Color - Cuts - Perms - Gift Shop

Summer is a great time for a new look

Don’t Replace Your Old Concrete

JJuu sstt RRaa iissee ii tt aa nndd SSaavvee mm oorree tthh aann 7700 %%

Concrete Leveling is Mudjacking

630-440-2213jfconcretelifting.com [email protected]

Serving Aurora IL and Surrounding AreasAll Projects Have 3 year Warranty

Driveways • Sidewalks • PatiosGarages • Stoops • Void Fills • Steps

Pool Decks • Commercial & Industrial Uses

Don’t Replace it...Raise It and Save Money

Before After Before After

Before After Before After

Don’t Replace it...Raise It and Save Money

PINBALL MACHINESCOIN OPERATEDARCADE GAMESDART MACHINES

IN HOME REPAIRSBUY & SELL

HOME AMUSEMENTS(630)742-2472

Classy ClassifiedsThe following are real ads collected from

newspapers around the country...

•Mixing bowl set designed to please a cook with round bottom for efficient beating.

•Semi-Annual after-Christmas Sale.

•And now, the Superstore--unequaled in size, unmatched in variety, unrivaled inconvenience.

•We will oil your sewing machine and adjust tension in your home for $1.00.

•Girl wanted to assist magician in cutting-off-head illusion.

Blue Cross and salary.

•For Sale. Three canaries of undermined sex.

•Get rid of aunts: Zap does the job in 24 hours.

•Christmas sale. Handmade gifts for the hard-to-find person.

•A hospital posted a notice in the nurses' station saying:

"Remember, the first five minutes of a human being's life are the most dangerous."

Underneath, a nurse had written:"The last five are pretty risky, too...."www.reelprovideo.com

REEL PRO VIDEOREEL PRO VIDEORestoring your past to preserve the future

630-879-8900

Photos? Home Movies? Slides?

TRANSFER TO DVD

www.waiglobal.com

s

AAGGRRIICCUULLTTUURRAALL && IINNDDUUSSTTRRIIAALLSSTTAARRTTEERRSS•• AALLTTEERRNNAATTOORRSS •• DDCC MMOOTTOORRSS

815-756-9019 1-800-832-2489

M.A.R.S., Inc.Starters - AlternatorsStarters - Alternators

GeneratorsGenerators

wwwwww..MMaarrssSSttaarrtteerrss..ccoomm

FOR ADVERTISING, CALL MICHELLE AT (815)751-1286

$391,000 Question...Beekeepers use this to calm bees when they are collecting honey or relocating a hive.A) Music B) SmokeC) Dogs D) Ammonia$392,000 Question...Bees make this to feed their young and so they havesomething to eat during the winter.A) Honey B) WaxC) Paper D) Gardens$393,000 Question...There are about this many different species of bees in the world.A) 5,000 B) 10,000C) 15,000 D) 20,000$394,000 Question...Bees live in colonies and there are this many types of bees in each colony.A) 1 B) 2C) 3 D) 4 $395,000 Question...The queen bee has only one job. It is to...?A) Clean hive B) Secure the hiveC) Lay eggs D) Scare predators$396,000 Question...This bee is female and their job is to clean the hive, col-lect pollen and nectar to feed the colony and they takescare of the offspring.A) Queen B) WorkerC) Drone D) Headmaster$397,000 Question...The drone bee has this distinction in the hive?A) Only males B) Excellent hunterC) Can sting D) Prettiest bee

(Answers below - See you next issue)

Answers: $391 - B $392 - A; $393 - D; $394 - C; $395 - C; $396 - B; 397 - A.

THE

BUMBLEBEE

QUIZ

Opee Gazette says: Let’s Play!Who Wants To Be A Zillionaire?


• 40 Years Experience• Electrical Repair or Replacement• Mechanical Repair• Fabrication and Welding• Custom Wood Working

CLASSIC AUTOMOBILE RESTORATION

663300--880022--88771144www.jeffbakerrestoration.com

LLC.

Broken Ribs Scene: Patient laying on a gurney with the doctor

standing next to him holding up an x-ray. Doctor: Do you want the good news or the bad

news first? Patient: Give me the bad news I guess. Doctor: The bad news is your x-ray shows that you

have three broken ribs. The good news is we fixed itwith Photoshop.

Bumpers Most people hate to parallel park. The other day, I

saw this woman trying to get out of a tight parkingspace. She bumped the car in front, then backed up andhit the car behind her. This went on about two minutes.

I walked over to see if I could somehow help. Myoffer was declined. She said, "Why have bumpers ifyou're not going to use them once in a while?"

Bus Fare Before boarding a bus, a man asked the driver,

"What is the fare to the train station?" "Sixty cents," said the driver. The man raced alongside the bus until the next stop

and then gasped, "What is the fare now?" "Ninety cents," said the driver. "You're running the

wrong way." Fishing

A wife returning from a fishing trip with her husband was telling her troubles to a neighbor.

"I did everything all wrong again today," she said. "I talked too loud, I used the wrong bait, I reeled in too soon, and I caught more fish than he did."

35 Unique ShopsUnder One RoofHOURS: Tues - Sat 10-5Thurs 10-8, Sunday 11-5

701 N. State St. (Rt 31) Elgin, IL 60123

1 mile S. of I-90 (847)695-3066www.StateStreetMarketShops.com

Enjoy the day at theLARGEST

GIFT & ANTIQUEShop in The Fox Valley

815.751.1286

you See This AdYour customers will too.

Advertise in the ORANGE PEELGAZETTE


Hetts Auto SalesLooking for a quality used

vehicle? All our vehicles aresafety inspected, have a

carfax report and many arepriced in the

$3000 - $9000 range. View our inventory at

www.hettsautosales.comHetts Auto Sales is located

in downtown Oswego by theR/R tracks, “Our mission is

to give you a pleasurablebuying experience” and

remember owner, Ed and son, Matt are your friends

in the car business.Hetts Auto Sales

69 W. Washington St. (Rt 34)Oswego, IL 60543

630-554-9339www.hettsautosales.com

CASH PAIDWWII, WWI

Military uniforms,photos, swords, medals,

patches, helmets, posters,souvenirs, estate items,

older firearms, collector630-215-3664

Garage Doors by CurtSales and Service

We Sell CHI DoorsLift Master Openers

(630)276-3453

BUYING

AUTOMOTIVEThe Right Guy

Carpet Cleaning, IncCertified Cleaning for Carpet

Tile/Grout, Area Rugs, Upholstery, RV’s

Residential/Business/Rentalswww.TRGCarpetCleaning.comFor Reviews & Pics • 19yrs Exp.630-264-4369 Free Estimates

CARPET CLEANING

GARAGE DOORSEGGS FOR SALE

AL’S ELECTRIC(Semi Retired, but not Tired)

Licensed • 45 yrs ExpJust Call Al (630)514-6569

ELECTRICAL

Ed & Judie’s Chicken EggFarm: Self Service6S260 Hankes Rd

Aurora (630)907-0775

$150 Mixed Face Cord$175 Oak Face Cord

Free Delivery/Stacked630-907-0775 Ed________________

FIREWOOD

OPG - CLASSIFIED ADS & BUSINESS DIRECTORY$16.50 FOR 4 LINES (2 ISSUE MINIMUM) • CALL MICHELLE AT (815)751-1286 • PAGE 10

HANDYMAN-NAILS-ITHome Improve/Rpr/Maint

handyman-nails-it.com(630) 360-3039

_______________

Glass Repair & ReplacementBroken window/door Repair

224-228-1000Classic Glass and Glazing

GLASS REPAIR

HOUSE CLEANING

Audelia & Veronica’sHouse Cleaning Services

630-935-5287630-506-2895

_______________

Batavia, Sugar Grove, St. Charles & Woodridge office & warehouse space for lease, from 1,500sq ft to 12,000sq ft. For info Call Don 630-330-7637or Sarah 630-318-2341

INDUSTRIALSPACE FOR RENT

Do A Plan B /Work HomeFT/PT-Pro's&Travel AgentsEARN As You Learn/Easy

Call: 888 648 3030_______________

HANDYMAN

CAREGIVER

Cheryl’s Helping HandExperienced compassionate

caregiver for 15 years.Overnights, affordable rateFull & P/T 331-222-0776

______________

Travel Agentfantastic rewards & bonuses

Call/email [email protected]

———————-

FOR SALE

2000 Toyota Celica GTSRed, A/T, 115K, Leather

Very Good condition, 1 owner, Sun roof,

Alloy wheels, Garage Kepttxt or call 630-660-0884

FINANCE

SBA DISASTER RELIEFInvestment Property Loans:commercial, rental, rehab,

small business, Free consultLaura 630-674-LOANB2 Business Finance

[email protected]

Cash for Record AlbumsRock • Jazz • Blues

Type In Turn Table StylusSt. Charles 206-432-1682

_______________

MASSAGE THERAPYEQUIPMENT

port.table, 2 massagechairs, Prego pillow, Excellent condition

Make offer 630-699-5458______________

COMMERCIALSPACE

Farnsworth Offices, 1444 N. Farnsworth, Auroraoffice space for lease from

150sq ft to 2500sq ft. Conference rooms and

Virtual Office options alsoavailable. Call Howard or

Cathy 630-585-1250.

Accepting ApplicationsFT/PT ice cream truck

drivers/sales, Aurora, ILSlammin’ Ice Creamz, Inc

Chofer para manajartroca de helado630-741-9382

HELP WANTED

LAWN CARE SPECIALAerate $35 (48”Gate)

Fertilizer $59 (0-10,000)Overseed Free with A & F

Beautiful Lawn & Tree Care630-585-0221

LAWN CARE

Blown in Attic Insulationand removal + other services

Insured; 25 years Exp.Floyd (331)228-0191

INSULATION

2 cemetery plots atLincoln Memorial Park

Oswego - $800 ea630-232-8096

______________

Lanza Masonry Inc.Brick, Stone, Blocks

Tuck Pointing847-833-3384

_______________

MASONRY

RON’S QUALITY PAINTINGInterior - Exterior

Affordable & CleanOver 25 years experienceFree Estimates - Insured

(847)489-9907_______________

AGUAS REMODELINGAll Kinds of Repairs;

Electrical - WallsBathrooms - Kitchens

PaintingHabla Espanol

(847)809-1102 Jesus________________

J & L BUILDERSHandyman ServiceBasement Finishing

Kitchen & Bath RemodelingYour Complete Remodeling

Service. Free Estimates(630)334-1322

J-LBUILDERS/facebook_______________


Tree Pruning & RemovalCall ISA Certified Arborist

Joe (224) 789 - 8773Northern Kane & Dupage Co

www.ArborJoe.com_______________

OPG - CLASSIFIED ADS & BUSINESS DIRECTORY$16.50 FOR 4 LINES (2 ISSUE MINIMUM) • CALL MICHELLE AT (815)751-1286 • PAGE 11

Information gathered herein is from sources considered reliable.Accuracy however cannot be guaranteed. All humorous stories

and jokes appearing here are intended for entertainment purposes only and are not meant to disrespect or harm any

group or individuals. Ads appearing in this paper are not to be considered as an endorsement or validation by Orange Peel

Gazette for products or services offered.

TREE SERVICEREMODELING

STEVE’S TREE & STUMP REMOVAL

Call or Text630-943-6350

July issues of the Orange PeelGazette will be distributed on the

July 8 and July 22Next Issue Ad DeadlineJuly 8 June 23

Welcome Home provides people who have moved with useful community information and FREE gifts from localmerchants: all to help you become familiar with the area.

Call or Text For a Visit -Batavia • North Aurora • Batavia/Mill Creek

Jennifer Zack • 630-229-2001

Moved Recently?We would enjoy meeting you!

- www.welcomehomebatavia.com -

Refrigerator A woman went to her psychiatrist and said, "Doctor,

I want to talk to you about my husband. He thinks he'sa refrigerator."

"That's not so bad," said the doctor. "It's a ratherharmless complex."

"Well, maybe," replied the lady. "But he sleeps withhis mouth open and the light keeps me awake."

School QuestionMother: "Why are you home from school so early?" Son: "I was the only one who could answer a question." Mother: "Oh, really? What was the question?" Son: "Who threw the eraser at the principal?"

When you’re not quite the perfect daughter it helps to have

The Perfect Dad

Pick Up LinesDid you fart? Because you just blew me away

I may not be the best-looking guy in here, but I'm theonly one talking to you.

I must be in heaven because I'm looking at an angel!

You must be in a wrong place - the Miss Universe contest is over there.

Bill’s Custom ServicesInterior/Exterior

Painting & Drywall Etc.Wallpaper hanging/removalOver 20 Years Experience

Free Estimates/Insured Now Offering Carpet Cleaning

(815)482-4155_______________

PAINTING

Live-in Housekeeper/Companion. References

own apt/rent/work options630-232-2935

WANTED

To appear in the next issue of the ORANGE PEEL GAZETTEcontact Michelle at (815)751-1286

www.OrangePeelGazetteKaneCo.com

LOOK FOR THE NEXT ISSUE OF THE ORANGE PEEL GAZETTE ON JULY 8, 2020


A Few Funnies!"A man may be a fool and not know it...but not if he is married." -H.L. Mencken

"My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and

vehicle maintenance." -Tim Allen

Yes, That’s Me Officer! When I went to get my driver's license renewed,

our local motor-vehicle bureau was packed. The lineinched along for almost an hour until the man ahead ofme finally got his license.

He inspected his photo for a moment and commented to the clerk, "I was standing in line solong, I ended up looking pretty grouchy in this picture."

The clerk looked at his picture closely, and reas-sured him, "It's okay. That's how you're going to lookwhen the cops pull you over anyway."

Speed of Learning Instructor: "Isn't it remarkable how quickly the kidslearn to drive the car?" Parent: "Yes, especially considering how slowly theycatch on to running the lawnmower and vacuumcleaner."

1-800-TEC-CITY1-800-TEC-CITY

• Automotive - Import & Domestic• Heavy Duty Industrial• Agricultural Equipment• Construction Equipment• High Amp Alternators• Hot-Rods & Classic Cars• Recreational Vehicles• Lawn Equipment• Motorcycles • Snow Plows• Race Cars

M.A.R.S, Inc.Starters • Alternators • Generators

www.MarsStarters.comCall For

Business to Business Pickup & Delivery

Don’t have time to wait? We offer 100% NEW units!

- - Call us First - - SS ttaa rr ttee rrss••AA llttee rrnnaa ttoorrss••GGee nnee rraa ttoorr ssRebuilt to SAVE you Money!

WBENC CERTIFICATION# - WBE17013991-800-832-2489 • 815-756-9019

Expires 7/31/20

Expires 7/31/20

Expires 7/31/20

Expires 7/31/20

kane & k endall counties free - orange peel gazette

Documents