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Andrew Lumban Gaol (left) presenting his logo design to the collaborating

artists (left to right) Situmorang, Afiff, Ong, and curator Samboh (right).

The logo is used in Afiff’s work, Kartu Tanda Penduduk Sementara, (KTPS,

Special ID Card, 2012-...).

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It’s almost been four years since Lashita Situmorang (b. 1974) initiated Red District Project (RDP). RDP focuses in bridging the communication between the marginalized communities and the public through arts and cultural activities; be it workshops, lectures, seminars, exhibitions, etc. By nature, RDP works closely with artists though it is an open space for everyone in the community. RDP’s first project (2008) is to create an healthy, long-term relationship between the sex workers in Sarkem (short for Pasar Kembang) and the local residents. Though RDP is still actively involved with the development of the Sarkem community, RDP now seek to share its process and experience from this active community of Sarkem sex workers and ex-sex workers to similar communities/groups worldwide. RDP is now (2012) starting an initial research upon transvestites’ communities in Yogyakarta.

Jimmy Ong (b. 1964) and Ferial Afiff (b. 1981) are two artists that have grown interest into Situmorang’s RDP. The three of them have agreed on collaborating in a long-term process. The first step that the three collaborators have agreed to take on is being actively involved in RDP’s next project, which focuses into transvestites’ communities.

This collaboration is curated by Grace Samboh (b. 1983). For a period of time, she was working within the environment of established (art) spaces. Recently, she decided to be autonomous in curating shows and initiating projects. There are, at least, two intriguing aspects of the three women collaboration that ticks her curiosity in joining ‘on board’. 1) She never believed in egalitarianism in terms of contemporary art production, ergo equal collaborations are (almost) impossible. 2) The fact that this is an artist-initiated long-term research-based project that seeks to involve other communities.

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This showcase is an extension of one of iCAN’s program Wips! (Work in Progress) —a presentation forum for artists, curators, researchers, and cultural practitioners to enrich insights and develop a broader yet intimate discourses. Instead of one discussion session, the collaborating artists will present their findings and the artifacts of their ideas, starting from August 3. As days go by, more and more findings, sketches, images, ideas will be added to the showcase.

The starting point of this collaboration is: Three artists with three different ideas who are willing to go through their own processes together, who are open to each

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other’s sources, who are willing to share knowledge between each other. The fact that they call themselves “The three women collaboration” is in itself a statement. It comes with at least two premises: 1) they are viewing their works from women’s perspective; or 2) they want their work to start with the fact that they are women.

Inspired by the way Lashita completed her art project in Sarkem, Yogyakarta, (Red District Project 2008-2009), Ferial and Jimmy followed her lead in doing their research regarding the makciks. Some people acknowledge makcik as transvestite, transsexual, transgender, she-male, etc. The project chose to use the term makcik to hopefully freely define their findings upon this research.

Yogyakarta, August 2012Grace SambohCurator

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This work is installed in the terraceof the iCAN building. This is a sound

installation with five speakers playingdifferent records. The records are

selected parts of conversations and ambient noise that happened in

Ngebong during the collaborators research visit.

iCAN is located on a busy street called Jalan Tirtodipuran. Since the work can

only be ackonwledged when it gets dark, this site specific piece further

simulate Ngebong’s atmosphere.

Photo taken by Antariksa.

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These four videos are edited collaboratively by all three artists. These

videos show highlights oftheir findings: Two separate interviews

of Makcik Sonya and Mami Tata; an evening of fast breaking at the

Sorogenen community; and a recording of a contingent of makciks rehearsing

and marching at the Fashion Week.

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Born in Jeddah, Saudi Arabia, 1982, Afiff is actively involved in a number of communities and organizations and her vast curiosity is embedded in her creative

process. Her art is solely based on interdisciplinary knowledge, emphasizing the personal opinions in various socio-cultural issues. Afiff has been known for her

performances even before she graduated from STISI-Telkom (2005). Growing up with a gymnastic background and majoring in the sculpture department for her

bachelor degree developed her sensibility in (human) body as a form that speaks for itself. Her performances do not use body as a form but rather as a medium to

convey her ideas.

Early 2012, Afiff decided on pursuing her interest into herself, her history of being and the fact that she somehow always felt foreign for her further artistic

development. Afiff logs all her ideas upon this pursuit under the title “Always Be A Foreigner” and intended this pursuit to be presented in a solo show in 2013.

For that, she is digging more and more into the history and domestic life of her Arabic-Indonesian family, the Islamic issues evolving around and her presence in that entire constellation. Being an independent woman was never an issue

to Afiff until she faced the fact that her surroundings seems to see it differently —considering the fact that she grew up and live within the patriarchal Javanese

culture that in its contemporary situation is highly influenced by Islamic values.

Though Afiff’s involvement happened during her side job of being Ong’s residency assistant, there are two vocal points that sets Afiff’s interest in this

project. 1) She sees a part of herself within the premise that most of the time the makciks are a stranger in their own society; not amongst them, but within the

society that they grew up in, live in, or work at. 2) As an outsider to the makciks, she sees how people might perceive the lives of the makciks as a staged life.

The fact that their whole life could be seen as a never-ending performance also intrigues her.

As quoted from Afiff: The most exciting part for me was the early meetings; introducing ourselves as artists, letting them understand that we are not social

workers, we would like to proceed with direct interactions and see what we can do with them. A couple meetings are enough to say that they are marginalized in our

society. They are just like shadows. They exist but no one recognizes their color but black. Other than the fact that there’s only man and woman as the sexuality option

our ID cards; our society also only will allow them to officially be around, work with, only if they’re dressed as men (read: the way the were born). Their identity

is submerged. Invisible. Though very slowly, they always find a way to be accepted in the society. Usually, firstly they stage themselves as men. After accepted, then

carefully they allow people to see them for who they are; makciks.

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Wanting to do something with (not only about or for) the makciks, Afiff decided to generate a special identification card (ID) for them. Not having an ID card is one of the common problems for lower class makciks. Since almost all of them ran away from their homes (and families), usually, they don’t have their birth certificates and family cards that are requirements for generating ID cards. But, because most of them spent their lives on the street, where accidents could happen anytime. Having ID cards would mean that if anything happened to them on the street, at least, there are informations on where to send the news or who to contact. Afiff’s ID card is made with that premise. They are allowed to put in whatever information they consider useful for them in the cards. She continues on gathering more and more makciks to be given KTPS (stands for Kartu Tanda Penduduk Spesial or Special ID and is similar to the official Indonesian ID card, which is KTP). This is a potentially never ending work.

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Afiff tries to dress herself, put on (what she considers as) makcik-look makeup. She began with trying as many poses as possible in front of her mobile camera. The video performance below is made to further explore the chain of ideas that have grown from Afiff’s need to feel what it’s like to be a makcik in a designated space.

As Affif noted: This work is not intended to be a live performance art; it is a video performance art piece. These performances were done in angle to explore angles, moves and space. The concept is to share the same feeling; to question the effort of being accepted, alienation in life. Life as if it is on stage, but real.

Music is one of the key elements in this video. ‘For Better Summer’ (by Bandung based band Strangers) was chosen because the lyrics share a similar concept.

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Born in Singapore, 1964, Ong is known for his charcoal drawings of human figures, emphasizing on the body and the bodily connection of his figures.

His artworks are his medium to share his detached personal experience into the public realm; creative self-therapy as he puts it. As an artist, Ong has been

exploring himself as a subject matter and objectifying it. Ong’s artworks are often doubts —his doubts— and never an answer. He sees those doubts as a process

that most artists go through. After a parade of works that began with his sexual identity, he now steps into marital issues. Ong bases his art on his immense

interest on intimate emotional issues in human relationships, especially in relation to gender roles.

Sita (of Valmiki’s epic Ramayana) as the paragon of a virtuous woman is a figure to look up to considering: 1) Ong’s need to rekindle his relationship with his mother within the fact that he has decided to let the woman in him to fully be herself; and 2) His marital experience as a man who takes the wife’s role in

a gay marriage. In his quest of the Sita figures in daily life, Ong did a month’s residency in Yogyakarta, early 2012. Putting Sita in the position of the epitome of womanhood, Ong’s interviews revealed different qualities of being a woman. His residency in Yogyakarta also hooked him up with several women artists who deal with women issues in, for, and by their works. Lashita Situmorang is one of them. Situmorang’s art project RDP #01 that deals with female commercial sex workers

and the communities surrounding them on daily basis intrigued Ong.

With this project, Ong seeks to explore and experience femininity and womanhood in the perspective of the makciks who basically are men appearing

to be women. How do they deal in daily life in relation to their gender (and/or sexual orientation) choices. Ong started his exploration by seeing the makciks as a physical manifestation of what he considers himself to be, a woman trapped in

a man’s body.

As quoted from Ong: In anticipation of meeting the transgender, I have tailored my inquiry from “gay feminist perspective “ to researching “the femininity in a

male to female transgender”. The transgender community thus becomes a focus group, a common subject matter. Often I am skeptical if most of what they said is

a projection of their alter egos. In time I learn to ask personal questions that reveal the unsaid. Once I narrowed down my query to what the transgender men really

feel inside, my interaction with them convinced myself that most of them carry more estrogens than some women, if not the determined fate of being one socially. I feel a need to acknowledge that maternal-feminine courage of being transgender,

especially in the person of Mami Tata. I wonder however, why they are not involved in women’s issues… It seems all of transgender life is about getting accepted into a

man’s world.

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1. All makciks hate their mothers (makciks and who are their life models as a woman?)

•Sonya moved out from her mother at 17. She gets along well with her stepfather. She rarely goes shopping with her mum, who comes to her house, compliments Sonya on her purchases and take home the said items.

•Mami Tata left her hometown to be a makcik but returns each year dressed as a man to visit her parents.

•T2 says she knows a family whose 3 sons turn out to be makciks and 4 daughters become lesbians. The mother of seven lost all her hair by the time the 7 children reach adulthood.

•As a mentor to her apprentice, Mami Tata says that being (a) makcik is (her) destiny, not curse.

2. All makciks want to be the “Perfect Woman” (makciks and their female identity/survivalship and social integration)

•Sonya quoted the perfect woman is based on the 3 Bs: Body, brain and behavior. Sonya recommends hormonal injections to surgical treatment, it is less painful and more natural.

•Sarita remove her makeups and put on a man’s clothes on holidays abroad, no one talked to her that day.

•Contrary to advice, all makciks adorn their high heels during the entire Fashion Week Parade.

3. All makciks want to be the best lovers to their men and be a good wife (makciks and their relationship with men as women)

•Shella says if you cook and care for him, he will stay.

•Sometime when Sonya gets angry with her boyfriend, she will give him a cosmetic makeover, forcing mascara and lipsticks on him just to remind him what it feel like to be a woman.

•S4’s live-in husband requests that her admirer come and live with them in the same

household as the other man needs her as much as him.•Sonya says she knows a makcik who consented to the

removal of her male genitals upon her man’s request; giving up her capacity to experience orgasm afterwards.

•S2 recounts that some makciks will commit petty crime for her man, renouncing family and law.

4. All makciks need a girlfriend and they make bonds quickly that last a lifetime (makciks and their lifetime community)

•Members from Badran recalls how they need to look out for each other as they are harassed by the residents as well as the clients (Johns). Resident civilian would install bright light to prevent them from prying their trade, and the johns would sometimes not pay or become violent when makciks refuse to service them.

•IWAYO take care of the dying from sickbed to grave, performing the relevant funeral according to the deceased’s chosen gender and religion.

•Sonia says she lost 13 friends within 7 months last year to HIV/Aids.

•Mami Tata says there is a group of 8 makciks who moves from locale to locale like gypsies.

5. Makciks are good with money (makciks and their gift to be a breadwinner/planning their retirement future)

•S2 rents out one of her two houses utilities-free, she has no time to read meters and haggle over water and electricity.

•L1 sometimes gives a blowjob for only 10.000 IDR and thinks that it’s better than not having any work before the night is over.

•S1 says someday when she meets a rich man, she can afford to have her complete body makeover.

•S1 recall making two to three hundreds thousands Ruppees in the 80s as a young makcik. She also says she forgot to save any money.

•Whenever Sonia passes by men, she ask them for cigarettes, just so she does not come across to the men as a rich bitch.

•In Badran kampong, the makciks raise two ducklings which become an income generating duck farm.

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Born in Samarinda, East Borneo, Indonesia, 1977, Situmorang first studied ceramics in the crafts department of Indonesian Arts Institute (ISI) – Yogyakarta.

Her disputes upon the definition of being an artist and its role (for oneself and in the society) stewed the whole crafts department. Being an epitome of a

rebellious student, she then stirred to paintings in the fine art department after a couple of years. Situmorang’s art are her commentaries of life in general. At

times, her disputes and shrives upon being a woman in the society that she lives in are shown in her works. When it comes to making art projects outside the art

communities, she’s a very caring and cautious one.

That might just be the initial secret behind the success of Red District Project #1 (RDP, 2008-2009) in Sarkem. She’d involve as much stakeholders as possible and

let things reveal themselves in front of her. She does not coerce the things she has in mind. For RDP #1, Situmorang worked with the commercial sex workers

in Sarkem and also the surrounding communities. Situmorang managed to hold arts and crafts workshop sessions for a whole three months in a rented studio in

Sarkem. Working with other artists as the mentors in the workshops, Situmorang successfully broke the ice between the female commercial sex workers and the

local residents so that they can communicate with each other; and that was her only goal. As a person, Situmorang is sure that she cannot resolve anyone’s

general social state and condition, let alone their welfare. But, as an artist, Situmorang believes she can offer different ways of seeing a (social) problem;

and diverge ways of responding to the issue(s).

Early 2012, Situmorang decided to continue her RDP. This time, she became interested in bridging the communication between the makciks and general

public. The stigmas that our society alleged them troubles Situmorang. Starting February 2012, she has started her research regarding the makciks. She has

generated a general mapping of the makciks’ communities and hang out places by now; so as the individual and in depth interviews with the makciks. In relation to her mapping, Situmorang stumbled upon the interesting layered meanings of

being a woman, womanhood, femininity and the concept of beauty.

As quoted from Situmorang: Intuitively, I became attracted to the makciks stories regarding the times when they discovered themselves and their own beauty, both as a makcik or as a woman. Make up, of course, holds a very important

position. Then I decided to create a makeover video. So I bought some make ups, the equipments that comes with it in order to generate a makeover corner in our

seven days showcase at iCAN. I wanted people who came by to be able to do a makeover there. I am interested in seeing the “slowly-revealed” beauty of each of

the participants. During the showcase, some boys also tried to put on (women-look) make ups and wigs. I was stunned on how beautiful they become. Jimmy found an

exact phrase for my fascination: Beauty is genderless.

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Makcik Sonya showing the ladies how she does her

make up. The make up corner documents everybody who

give a try to put on their own makeup for Situmorang’s

videowork.

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ANGELINA SONDAKH/ANCE/anjing/asu/shit/dog (curse)BANCI KALENG/kebanci-bancian/looks and acts sissy-likeBAWANG BOMBAY/bau/smellyBEGINDANG/begini/like thisBELALANG LENGGANG/beli lagi/buy moreBELONG DEDONG/bulu dada/chest hairsBELONG KEKONG/bulu kaki/leg hairsBENYONG/beli/buyBES/SACHI/banci/sissyBIMBING/bingung/confused

BISIKAN/bisa/canBUNG KARNO/bungkusan/packetCAPCAY/capek/tiredCEBONGAN/tongkrongan/hang out placeCEKONG/cakep/handsomeCUCOK/cocok/matchCUS/cepat/let’s go/ come onDENDONG/dandan/makeoverDIANA/dia/he or sheEMBER/iya/yes

Makcik Tamara contributes to Situmorang’s glossary. She considers this as one of her main needs in order to dig deeper into the makcik communities in the context of her RDP #2.

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ERBONG/ArabES GOSROK/gesek-gesek/touchyESLONG/asli/real/originalFUYUNGHAI/pusing/troubled/dizzyGARUKAN/razia polisi/police checkGEORGIA PERES MONTALVO/jorokGEWES/GAWUK/ NENONG/memek/vaginaGILINGAN/gila/crazyHABIBILAH/habis/finish/run outHANA PERTIWI/seluler/HP/cell or mobile phoneHEMONG/homoINTAN, INTRE/itu, ini/that, thisJAHARA/jahat/meanJEMBONG/jembut/pubic hairJENGONG/jangan/don’tKAMERUN/kamera/cameraKEMONG/kamar/roomKENTI/kontol/penisKENTUCKY/ketut/fartKEONG/kaya/richKLEWONG/keluar/go outKOES PLUS/kapan-kapan/laterLAMBRETA BAMBANG SURAJI/LAMBRETA/LAMONGAN/LAMBADA/LEMONG/lama/too longLEKONGAN/laki-laki/manLENTERA/lonte/bitch/sex workerLERONG/lari/runLES BIOLA/lesbianLIMA PELONG/lima puluh/fiftyLUMPIA LUMAJANG LEMBAYUNG/lumayan/it’s okay/not badLUPITA/lupa/forgotMALAYSIA/malas/lazyMALIDA/MELONG/malu/embarrassedMANDALA/PEJONG/peju/air mani/spermMARSI/marai emosi/makes me angryMEKONG/makan/eatMEONG/EWONG-EWONGAN/ngentot/fuckingMERONG/marah/mad/angryMETONG/mati/deadMINANG/minum (lotse)/drinkMLERONG/melirik/glanceMOTOROLA/motor/motor bikeNGANCING/pusing karena alkohol/hangover

NGEREBONG/meraba/touchingNGEREYONG/merayu/teasingNGESONG/oral/oralNJENAT/setiap tok-tok/puasa/fasting/celibateNYEBONG/NYEB-NYEB/kerja seks/selling sexPANTURA/pantat/butt/bottomPECONG/pacar/boy or girlfriendPELSONG/palsu/fakePENJERONG/penjara/jailPEPSI/REPITA/pipis/peePERES/pura-puraPEWONG/perempuan/femalePLERONG/penglarisan/johnPOLERONG/polisi/policePON-PON/poni/hair bangsRAM-RAM/rampok/robRAMBUT PETONG/rambut pendek/short hairREKSI/REXONA/rokok/cigaretteREWO-REWO/rusuhROMA IRAMA/jangan begadang/don’t stay up lateRUNGKIT/RUM-RUM/rumah/houseSAYUR/sayang/dearSEBENTONG/sebotol/one bottleSEPETONG/sepatu/shoesSEPILIS, SERITIS/sepuluh, seratus/ten, a hundredSEREBONG/seribu/a thousandSESONG/susu/payudaraSIMENWAWA/sebentarSISILIA/DEBORA/silit/dubur/rectum/anusSUNDARI SUKOCO/sunat/circumcisionSUNDES/kampungan/cheesyTABANAS/tas/bagTAKARA/takut/scaredTAMARA/tamu/guestTEMPONG/sodomiTENTERONG/tentara/soldiersTETI KADI/tetek/payudara/breast/boobsTEYONG/tahi/poo/shitTINTA/tidak/noTITI KAMAL/hati-hati kalau malam/be careful when it’s darkTONG BES/kelihatan banci/looks like a sissyTONG PEWONG/kelihatan perempuan/looks like a girlTUBANG/tua bangka/very oldWARWOR/MAKCIK/waria/transvestite

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Grace Samboh Thank you for coming, everybody. This presentation is a showcase of Ferial Afiff, Jimmy Ong and Lashita Situmorang’s works in progress. Together they claim to be the “Three Women Collaboration”. I will let them explain further after this. We are doing the showcase under iCAN’s platform called Wips! (Works in Progress). Most of the time, it is just used for one presentation/discussion session, but this collaboration expanded that single day discussion to be a showcase of works in progress. If you came here on the first day of their showcase, you would have found the space rather empty. As days went by, they kept adding new stuff out of their research and ideas for their upcoming works. Out in the front, there is one work that you can only see after it gets dark. It is a sound installation (and it’s their first collaborative work). There is one video performance piece near the toilet. Let us start with the collaborators giving a tour of this space…

Ferial Afiff Has everyone seen the space already?

Jimmy Ong We can just sit and point. I think I will start… I was here on a self-initiated

residency, checking out Jogja because my dealer Valentine Willie told me that it is a very happening place for artists. I have to see it for myself. So I came and it is true that the artist community here is very open, generous and I have not seen anything like this in Singapore where I come from. People here go to everyone’s events and they talk. There is no animosity between artists. Some artists are successful here, but most are not selling but it is still cool and they still relate.

I decided that I wanted to do a residency of my own, on a topic I am interested in. At that time, I was having an exhibition of drawings based on the story of the Ramayana in New York. It’s about the protagonist Sita, who as a woman has suffered injustice from the man of her life, Rama. When I gave a talk in New York, the audience told me that it is a very authored view from a gay person’s point. And it is not exactly a woman’s (point of view), and yet it looks feminist but it is not feminist. I was accused of not being truthful or accurate, but they were very interested in the storyline of Sita and the Ramayana… I have to explain to everyone there who is who and did what to each other. Then, I realized my drawings are very mute, they do not talk, they cannot tell a story.

I decided to come to Jogja to talk to women and find out how they feel about the story and if they have a feminist point of view in the contemporary situation,

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because Ramayana is very much alive in Indonesia. At first, I talked to many woman including artists who are dealing with woman issues, as well as academics. But I decided not to interview them for the fact that they know too much. So we targeted laywomen whom we meet in the street and in the restaurants.

When I was here, I was introduced to Ferial who was my assistant, and since I don’t speak Indonesian Bahasa, I was very reliant on her. I have to teach her what to ask the women I want to interview. Ferial turns out to be very instinctual and good in the mode of interview and story telling.

That excites me very much as I realized all my work in the past is about story telling in a visual way. I want to explore this, so conveniently I choose the medium of the video. Doing video while Ferial talked to the women in the village, in the batik workshop, in the cemetery and in the market. Basically I ask them what they think of Sita and the Ramayana story. How do you (to Ferial) feel about that? Do you have something to say on your experience about that?

Ferial It was the first time I got confused and asked myself, “Am I really a woman?” Haha. Because out of 7-10 questions from Jimmy’s interview were: 1) What is woman for you? 2) What is an ideal woman for you?

At first, Jimmy had asked me to watch Sita Sings the Blues (2009, directed by Nina Paley). Unlike most Ramayana stories where it ends when Sita walked on the fire and survived; Sita Sings the Blues ends only after Sita had two sons and Rama tested her for the second time. So, based on this extension of the story, I asked the women we interviewed, how would they feel if they were Sita.

Most of the women we met do not know the Ramayana story completely. Along the way, we also found out that most village women do not watch the shadow puppet (wayang). Only men come out and watch wayang. It means that the women don’t know much about the Ramayana story.

We also found out that many women struggle enough, they are not living the clichés life that women don’t make decisions and men do. Like one lady in Imogiri, she sells food and snack and her

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husband is a truck driver. They live in a very equal way. That experience changes my opinion about womanhood and how we live as women here in Indonesia.

Jimmy One of the women I met is Arahmiani, who isn’t here tonight. She introduced me to a few fables and stories; legends pertaining to women in Indonesia. The story of the Princess of the Sea; the story of the Mendut, Dayangsumbi and also Watu and Sita, which is an Asian version of Oedipus. Anyway, another woman I met is Lashita. She was working with sex workers in the red light district and her project was very interesting. I was very excited to have met her as many people actually pointed out to me that I should. When we finally met, she told me about the Red District Project (RDP). Lashita, do you want to tell us what it is?

Lashita Situmorang I started RDP in 2008. We begin with four months of research. I worked with a researcher because I was not very good at that. I haven’t really understood how to conduct a research. We then started making mappings and soon introduce the ideas and program plans together with the commercial sex workers and the citizen living in the red district area. But because they don’t really understand art, so I thought the main agenda is to have an actual communication with them. First, by doing workshops of making stuffs that are familiar and interesting for them. We began with introducing craft making, printmaking, performance, and things just grew. In 2009 April, we started the actual programs and workshops.

Grace Basically, Lashita built a studio within the red district area. She gathered artists to brainstorm with her to figure out what they can do for the community. Her actual goal was to make the sex workers there to become communicative and be social with the environment. Because even though they are in the same area, the commercial sex workers only go there to work. The others, the society, the residents act as if they don’t exist. So, the RDP’s main goal is to bridge the communication between the residents around (the district) and the commercial sex workers. To do so, she invited artists to do workshop there. The workshop was open for all; in the beginning, only the commercial sex workers came, but towards the end, the residents in the area was also interested and finally joined.

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Lashita We did the workshop in a studio I rented at the red district area. The workshop happened for three months and somehow things just worked out. Haha. The sex workers become more open, they gain confidence though they work as sex workers. Through RDP, we do not ask them to leave their profession. We have no such mission. We only wanted to bridge the communication between them and their surroundings. Breaking the ice by doing something with the arts. It’s a bonus if then they can do more by themselves.

Jimmy I was most impressed that Lashita managed to make the community of sex workers feel less marginalized, feel more comfortable to go out and relate to the people who live around the place where they work. To me, that is a big breakthrough. By her device of creating events in this community that share a same space, she has successfully, I think, made what I would call art activism. When she told me that the next focus group she is interested in are the transgender men who live and work near her former RDP studio, I was very excited and said I want to come and volunteer.

I went home, thought about it and then decided I will devise a residency that will involve Lashita and Ferial. Ferial, because having worked with her, I have known her as a performance artist who is interested in the subject of being an outsider in her own

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country. She feels that, being Arabic, she is often mistaken as a foreigner. And I thought, wow, that relates to the transgender situation. For they are like woman in a society but are not recognized as women. And also it relates to what I am thinking of as a gay man in a straight society… it is a similar situation. So I see that we really connect and share issues or subject matters and thereby devised this residency. The research started three weeks before I arrive, Lashita with Ferial has already started interviewing various transgender communities and making assessment interviews to find out more about them through various non-profits and NGO community-outreach. So you (to Lashita) want to continue from there? About the work you did last month? Maybe Grace would like to sum up for us what we did.

Grace Generally what they did is all there (pointing to time line on the wall). The timeline started from Lashita’s RDP because it is the core of everything (wanting to do community work, wanting to deal with marginalized communities and, to a certain extent, the need to collaborate). Jimmy wanted to “watch” Lashita‘s process when she decided to do the second research

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Showcase audiences reading the timeline of the project.

that deals with the transvestites, as the next marginalized community that RDP wants to explore. Lashita wanted to somehow bridge the communication between the transvestites and the wider public.

When the three artists decided to do the collaboration, since the very beginning, we separated the RDP and their collaboration. (The collaboration began with the three artists’ communicating through tons of emails, Facebook messages and Skype talks. They agreed upon working together, then decided to work with a curator. They asked me to join on board. I agreed and started observing their research process. They kept Jimmy updated by sending photos and sharing their experiences online.

For RDP #2, Lashita needed more time to think more about what she can do, what she has to do. For sure, it’s not going to be studio like RDP because the transvestites are living in different area in Jogja. And because all of them want their pictures to be large, none of them are shy or afraid. So, it’s a very different case compared to the (straight) sex workers.

For the collaboration, the initial research is one of the stimulants (for further steps and actions). Lashita hang out with the transvestites first in their respective place, like in Sidomulyo, Badran. Within their own community, in the places they live, and also at the red district area. The red district area, for them, is not just a place to sell their bodies, but more importantly it is a place for them to hangout. Maybe just like hanging out here (in art spaces) for us. Generally, Lashita did the mapping of the transvestites’ community in Jogja with Ferial. From that data, then they try to relate and

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generate their own interest as individuals towards the findings. The next step is for the artists to find out more and more (towards their interest).

Ferial We decided not to show the map because we are afraid that it may harm them (the transgender men). We are concerned with the fact that the (rightist Islamic groups or other) fundamentalists may misuse the mapping, because it shows where each and every one of them live, and it also shows their pick-up locations.

Teresa What do you hope to do with all these research findings?

Jimmy It will inform our artwork in the future… That’s a very good question!

Grace That is something we should discuss tomorrow… Haha. (Laughters from the floor.)

Jimmy We are going to make it into a National Geographic documentary... Haha.

Teresa Was there any Indonesian government funding for your projects, Lashita?

Lashita No. RDP is not an organisation, it is a program. I never wanted to be an organization. So, I can only wish this idea may eventually become their own, that they can take care of themselves…

Teresa In the places that you’ve visited, presumably they were all in their own home, is there some kind of a leader, a mamasan, who is quite influential, quite caring, and that she took them under her wings? Is there a kind of center that they can all come and talk to you now?

Ferial Actually, Lashita doesn’t want to have a center.

Some of the transgender leaders now are really looking at her (Lashita)... For example, the last meeting when they invited her to come for a fast-breaking event at one of the oldest NGO in Indonesia. When she arrived, all of a sudden they told her to sit on the panel and represent them by talking to the Depnaker (our government’s labour department). Of course, they hope that we will help them, but we have always make it clear to them that we are not social workers, we are not social welfare organizations. We are artists and as artists, what we can do through art, should be mutual. It should be useful for both sides; (the artists and the transgender). It’s different from taking care of them.

Enin Supriyanto What do they want from the labour department?

Lashita Help.

Jimmy They want a lot. When we first went to visit them, it was overwhelming, they were coming forward saying, “We need ID card, we need money, we need career…”

Ferial No, no, they don’t literally ask for the ID card

Grace No, they are just saying some of them don’t have ...

Jimmy Some of them don’t have ID card.

Enin And why?

Lashita Because most of them ran away from home. You cannot have ID card if you don’t have family card.

Enin Okay, I thought it was something to do with the legal system, that their sex classification has to be clearly defined in the (narrow-minded) government categorization system. Erh, my next question would be: where is the actual tension situated if you can recall, when you deal with the sex workers? The transgender tend to be, I don’t know, in between the communities… Or?

Jimmy Well, once they see that we are not really from the government, then everyone just relaxes…

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Enin First you mention Ferial, related the issue and concept of being a woman, bringing in this story of Sita and Ramayana. What is your finding? What is the tension? For example, the idea of the male role that you preemptively have in your mind you is now deconstructed or confronted…

Jimmy Erh… naturally. Since the three of us are three artists in a group, we each have different inquiry, or direction, that the transgender community inspires in us. The place from where each of us is looking is definitely individual. For me, what was interesting, going back to the Sita situation, was no longer about women’s rights or a woman’s place in the world; but about gender roles, about women negotiating themselves in the men’s world. And, I see it as an opportunity in a transgender who embodies the physical male and the feminine intention, who exemplify the

The Jogja Fashion Week parade rehearsal in July 6 at Badran.Photo taken by Budi ND Dharmawan.

perfect subject matter for me to explore. Because domestically I see myself in that situation: as a gay man living with another man. And I find myself confused; how I take on certain roles of a woman in relating with the man in my life. So, that is the tension, if I may say, that I have brought along; to find out and explore, what I might learn about the makciks. For me, what was very exciting is about the gender; how did they learn to be a woman?

Grace Actually, in the beginning of the collaborators discussions, they used the Indonesian word, “waria”. In English, it is officially “transgender”. But along the way, came some funny answers came about from Lashita’s first question on the research, which is: What is woman? What does being a woman mean to you? Similar to Jimmy’s questions in Sita, but with funny answers. Some of them actually want to believe they are woman. Some of them realized they are transgender: I am a man but I want to be a woman. Some of them want to change their sexuality. So many answers are all there. Then, at some point it

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became confusing discussing between transgender, transsexual and everything..

Ferial And then all the Indonesian (terms)… wadam, waria, wadon

Enin Banci, bencong…

Grace But, finally the three of of them decided to use the term makcik. Amongst themselves, they don’t call each other mbak nor mas (as we do in Jogja), but makcik.

Enin Does this only apply to the Jogja transgender community? Is the term also used in Jakarta or Surabaya?

Grace In Jakarta, yes.

Malcolm Smith What do you mean by they use “makcik”? What does makcik means?

Grace They call themselves makcik. It is a Malay word for aunty.

Ferial Because of Lashita’s need to make the glossary, we asked them what is makcik. Makcik in Bahasa Indonesia is waria (transgender). In English there are terms like transvestite, transsexual, transgender. Then, after I researched it a bit, the most similar description on what they are actually is “transgender” (in English). By saying similar, I am comparing the descriptions on how they describe themselves.

Lashita Makcik, for them, is mamak banci (sissy-mama).

Enin Is there any traditional or social root of this transgender group in the Javanese culture?

Jimmy In the Bugis culture, there is.

Enin In Makasar, especially in Bugis, yes, I know. But In Javanese, probably there are no transgender. In Warok, there’s this ritual where strong men carry the heavy stuffs in a kind of lion dance masks. It is a ritual. But, in the Bugis society, there’s a “special”…

about it…

Ferial Bissu, ya?

Enin Yes.

Jimmy By the way everyone, this is Enin Supriyanto, curator at large…

Malcolm Can I go back to your original question, “where is the tension”? To me this is such a problematic project. And, in an interesting way, a fun way, I like the way the iCAN space is used for problematic projects. To me, the dilemma is, that there is binary that exists between masculine and feminine, whatever. And you question the binary, but at the same time just reinforce the binary. Except for that part which you separated (RDP), to me, this project’s argument is circular in trying to avoid the binary but still talking about it. The problem is, all you are doing is reinforcing the binary whereas the makcik is separated to all this as well. So, there is all these kinds of unresolved bits that is all in waiting of resolve in this project. To me, that is a problem…

Jimmy Of course, I took upon this as a personal issue; so, I continue in that manner. Regarding myself as an ignorant person, because I did not believe that makciks are women. I go with the skeptical view that they are still men trying to be women… but as I experience and talk to them, I am a convert: That they are really woman! They are teaching me a lot of things that I realize I need to just give up my own preconception of being a woman and being a man. Now, I am beginning to see that I exist in both (genders) and that I am just at either end in different gendering of my social being.

Malcolm I would be interested to hear from the women about this.

Grace The thing is the project, the collaboration, actually started with the

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premise that the three of them are individuals with their own practices. They just agreed on working around the same subject, issue, whatever you call it. Up until now, what is visually seen here in this showcase is (each of) them going back to themselves…

To further look into their works, say Ferial for example. She never had a problem as a woman, but now she starts questioning about being woman. If you see the video performance piece near the toilet, the way she questions her womanhood goes back to her idea on the theme “always being a foreigner” which she (personally) is digging up for her next project.

And Lashita too. She is working within her bigger frame that goes back to her next RDP. The whole collaboration is just a different research approach and process for her. In this collaboration, she can explore. Maybe Ferial can explain more about being “always a foreigner”?

Ferial Yes, I am the latest to join the collaboration. The last time I talked to Sonya...

Grace And, who is Sonya?

Ferial Sonya is our “local” guide to meet the makciks. She is our bridge (in terms of communication with the makciks). When she goes home to her family, she experiences the same situations like other makciks. Her parents will tell her to take her makeup off, cut her hair short.

Then we met a mother (of one of the makciks) during the Jogja Fashion Week. At first, I felt very positive, “Ah, you support your child!” The mother replied, “Yes, of course.” But then after a couple minutes of talk she mentioned, “My child is a man. I gave birth to him. I know for sure he’s a man. It’s just that his hobbies are doing makeup, salon and sewing the dress.” I asked the mother again, to confirm, “What if your child decide that he wanted to be a woman?” She replied strictly, “No, he cannot. Its’ prohibited in the Islam.”

The mother was wearing hijab. I then think through my own religion, which is Islam. I’ve never heard anything about this in the Islamic rules. I used to have a private course on Islam when I was still very young. It was an advance thorough course on Islam, as I recall. I thought maybe I forgot something… But, until now, I haven’t find anything written in Islam on choosing one’s gender…

Grace & Enin Well, it’s not a choice. For sure. Haha.

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Ferial I figure that Sonya’s feeling towards going home is similar to mine, whenever I go home. My family will also tell me what to do, how to be, or even set up a date for me with a few men. Because they think that now is my “expiry age”. They also think that it’s easier to find me a man (for me) now, otherwise it’s going to be very difficult for them to find me a match when I’m grow older. Haha. On the other hand, I think, it’s also about them wanting to take off their responsibilities as my parents. By settling my marriage, I then become the responsibility of the husband. So, I felt the similarities. My family would advise me to do this and that, questioning my choice of being an artist. I feel uncomfortable at home and also outside my art circle (of friends).

As makciks, they also have difficulties to show people who they really are. Some people are afraid of them, while others are busy with giving advice or trying to convert them back to men. Again, I felt similar. I felt those things often when people don’t recognise me as Indonesian. Even if I already explained that my whole family is Indonesian. Everytime I arrive in the train station, they offer, “Hotel, hotel… becak, becak… Miss?” as if I am

a foreigner. In one of our meetings about this project, about a month ago, there’s this Papua man talking to me in English. Even after I explained that I am fully Indonesian, he insisted on speaking English to me... I felt the same: resisted, judged…

Enin You mentioned that most of the makciks are not afraid to expose themselves?

Grace Yes, but it’s (only) within their own community.

Ferial There are many different conditions, actually. Some are trying very hard to be a part of society (in their own ways). Some directly introduce themselves as makciks. Some (do) not. The leader and “mother” in Sorogenen community, Mami Tata for example. At her entrance, she usually appears as a man. She makes friends with the people in the society. After they get comfortable of her existence, she will “come out”, she’ll say that she’s a makcik. With this smooth way, it helps them to be accepted in the society.

Lashita And even by the punk community… in Mami Tata’s case.

Jimmy If I may add, it’s not so much about exposing them. But in relation to the female sex workers that Lashita has been dealing with, there is always a problem every time we want to post pictures on the website. Having to erase their eyes, making them pixelated, etc. We don’t have this issue with the makciks.

I think because they are both man and woman, they have two gender faces. When they dress up as a woman, it is very hard to identify (the man in) them, especially with their exaggerated (or makcik-styled) makeup. Then, of course, makciks have this exhibitionistic part about them. Whose public they perform for, they dance for… They have a way to be accepted by the public

Olivia Sonya Aresta at her interview session with the

collaborators.

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by being an entertainer, a social clown.

Unidentified audience (inaudible) When you talk about career, the transgender choices are limited to the entertainment, in the show business. It is the common stigma.

This is really random (rampant?), for example, as in television today. Their success in becoming another gender is something that looks promising. Did you find anything related to that (career) tendency? Is this (transgender trend) just another career opportunity? Or for any kind of acknowledgement or attention? Or is this another issue of identity?

Jimmy I think that the stigma is one of the issues that they would have to live with socially. There are very limited stereotypical careers they could choose: as a drag queen in a cabaret; as a makeup artist which does not pay well, maybe less than a woman. Or, maybe careers like working in a nursing home, in the hospital. They are even met with the stigma within the hospital. People are afraid of them, some superstitious discrimination against makciks. Mami Tata goes to work dressed up as a woman in the hospital.

Okay, let’s use Mami Tata for an example. She was talking about how she is a good truck driver. She would really like to be one too. But the option is not there for her because of her persona as a woman. She said that she would still dress up the way she’s comfortable (woman-like) even when she’s driving a truck.

Enin The transgender issue is quite interesting in relation to popular culture, especially in Indonesia. I don’t know if people here are familiar with a famous public figure in television, named Dorce. She presents herself not only as a woman, but as a hajah. That means a woman who has made a haj pilgrimage. At one point, when we talk about the limited opportunity about these people in public life, they want to work but is stereotyped for their gender. But if we put this case in the popular culture, Dorce is very famous and always represents herself as a hajah. And yet everybody knows that she is transgender.

Coming back to my question, where is the tension actually located when we address this issue in the Indonesian contemporary context?

Grace Dorce’s case is pretty much like Sarita.

Jimmy Yes, we met this entertainer named Sarita...

Enin Would this case be possible in Singapore or Malaysia? Even in popular culture, in (mass) media, the gender minority issue is still bold.

Jimmy Russell, do you have an example? Russell is from Singapore.

Russell Heng I am also part of the LGBT movement in Singapore that started in 1992. My experience with Singapore transsexual who are open and out, they are largely in the performing arts. Like Kumar for example. But, somebody who has done a haj pilgrimage and is openly a transsexual, I have not come across such a case in Singapore. It may not be easy.

My experience with Malay Muslims and gay people in Singapore is something like this: In private

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parties, they can come and have a good time, but they are actually very cautious about having a public profile. Can I take your observation and ask: increasingly in this role, religiosity is becoming a big issue, in Indonesia you read about it… so when you are interviewing all these makciks, how do they negotiate all these problems? How to be a good Moslem woman, how can you be a good Moslem and a transsexual? Did you touch upon this?

Ferial Yes, there is one Islamic boarding school for the makciks named Pondok Pesantren Waria (Ponpes Waria).

Lashita The only one in Indonesia and, yeah, it’s in Jogja! They are quite popular on documentary-based programs in our national television too.

Enin Good... in TV !

Lashita There (within) the Ponpes Waria, when they pray, they (the transgender) can choose whether they want to be a woman or a man. The Ponpes Waria provides mukena (burka) and sarong.

Ferial In Islam, when you pray you have to choose,

After the interview at Ponpes Waria.

either you wear a mukena or a sarong (meaning you present yourself to God either as a woman or as a man).

Enin Yes, in Islam, you have to pick the dress code.

Grace If you are a woman you wear the mukena and if you are a man you wear the sarong. In the Ponpes Waria, the founder (Ibu Maryani) wears burka and her legal ID card says that she’s a woman.

Enin Oh, even the founder is a transgender.

Grace Yes, yes.

Ferial It is in that photo (pointing), under 1 July… She is the one in purple.

Grace She gives her peer group options. When they want to pray, since it’s their personal relationship with God, which do they want to be? Man or woman? Either mukena or sarong. Some still wear sarong. That says something, doesn’t it?

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Unidentified audience Speaking of religions. We have different kind of examples. There’s Dorce the muslimah transgender and there is Sonya who is now known as activist for transgender. How do they see religions? Did you guys touch on that issue? Because, in my opinion, how Dorce represents herself as a haj and how she uses this position of someone in remorse, a Moslem with repentance, is interesting. Here in Jogja, you can also see Ibu Maryani and Ibu Shinta, and some more transgender (men) wearing hijabs. I am interested in how the makciks sees the religion.

Ferial Some of them wear a cross on necklaces too. Mbak Betty for example (as seen on the Jogja Fashion Week Parade pictures, Mbak Betty is the group leader with green head accessories on page 42).

Russell Can I bring in a Malaysian perspective? A friend of mine researches the issues of transgender in Malaysia. In Malaysia, they call them maknyah and they have large community of Moslem maknyah. My friend showed me one of her case studies. One of the problem that Malay Moslem transsexual woman has is that: They would dress as a woman, but when it comes to an operation, they think very hard about having one. Because the parents of some of them would say, “Please, if you need to dress as a woman, I can’t stop you, go ahead. But if you have an operation, I cannot bury you in a Moslem cemetery when you die. You cannot have salvation and go to heaven.” Is this a problem too in Indonesia?

Lashita After I visited several communities in Jogja, I found one very interesting kampong. There in the kampong, the makciks and the residents around the area have a very good relationship. Furthermore, the residents in the kampong acknowledge the makciks “final” problem: death. They

realizes that makciks’ biggest worry is when they grow old, and because everybody surely will die, they have to plan their death, the way they want to be buried (or cremated or whatever). Death becomes the biggest worry because most of them have no families or relatives, again, as we have mentioned, most of them run away from their homes.

The government’s social department has their own solution for this. They bury the makciks together with homeless people, stray kids, beggars, etc, in a public cemetery owned by the government.

Ferial There in that cemetery, they bury people in a slanted position (not sleeping with their face looking up like the usual way).

Lashita Slanted because the available space is very limited. People consider that place as a mass cemetery for “abandoned” people because the government’s policy definitely reflects that. The makcik community finds that policy disappointing.

Anyway, back to the kampong I was telling you about. The Sidomulyo residents consider death (and the ritual that comes with it) as very important, and that every human being deserves a proper ritual. They have this initiative to help the makciks organize their burial by collecting what they call “Dana Abadi” (eternal fund) every month. It is only 5,000 IDR (less than 1 US$). Whenever someone gets sick, or dies, the collected money is used to help.

This initiative shocked the social department. Unfortunately, their after-shock reaction is not for the better, if I might say so. They thought this way, “Oh, well, then. That issue (makcik death and burial) is solved on its own. It means that we don’t have to think about it anymore.”

According to the makciks, Sidomulyo is the only kampong in Indonesia that has this (organized death ritual) for the makciks.

Grace So, who lives there? How many of them? Is it a kampong for makciks only? Or, even more specific, for old makciks?

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Lashita There are about 30 makciks in the Sidomulyo. Not all of them are old. It’s not specifically for old makciks or only makciks. It is a regular kampong.

Grace Ah, so Sidomulyo has a cemetery for everyone in the area... It’s a public cemetery.

Ferial Yes, it’s a common kampong

Teresa And is that also funded by social service?

Grace No, as mentioned just now, they collect their own money and use it for their own emergencies.

Teresa What happens with the social service that you just mentioned?

Grace The social service fell in love with that idea and decided that this means the makciks no longer need their help.

Teresa So the social service knew about this later, that there is a system of fund raising for the transgender and for children who are homeless. But the area is so small…

Enin In the mosque, do they go through Moslem ritual too? How do they wash the body? As a woman or as a man?

Lashita As a man.

Enin Okay.

Russell Even if you are found to have the operation (sex change)?

Lashita No, nobody has operation here…

Ferial Several did and those who did (who could afford it) never come back to Indonesia. Generally, it’s rare because to do a genital surgery in Indonesia is almost impossible because it is very expensive.

Enin Back to artistic practice, Jimmy. You have been mainly doing the media of drawing. And you told us in the beginning that you realised most of your work; drawing, painting are basically story-telling. How do you find yourself now moving away from representation to a direct manner?

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In July 30, Afiff, Situmorang, Sonya and Samboh went

and hang out at Ngebong, the biggest makcik hangout place and also their red light distrrict. It is located on the

western part of the Tugu Station.

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Jimmy Well, I am still exploring it. I have been consciously moving away from drawings, I have recently identified the mode of video and the medium of performance, which I remember as an art student I was pretty good at. So, I am reviving that interest and tapping on that.

For the question of tensions you were asking for, I can only look at it in a personal way. I was looking at how the ordinary makciks, not the entertainer or the superstar, deal with ordinary things like mourning. As in a funeral, mourning over their husbands or crying, which is something men do not do. And is there a kind of conflict if they are really women in men’s bodies, how do they deal with it? So those are the personal tracks, that I am going about in my interviews while observing and being in the presence of the makciks; which is informing me and changing my ideas about them. I suppose, I will continue to explore the subject matter; embodying them. In other words I am able to channel them, and use it for performance and making video.

Grace Why don’t you tell us the story about the Mon Dieu piece? (refer to page 17)

Jimmy For example, when I interviewed Sarita, after a whole hour I realized she was performing from beginning to end. I really don’t know her inside, whether as man or as woman. And then I realize, wow, there is a lot I have to cut through and I don’t get much out of her. I was thinking how do you convey yourself as a transgender if you are her. Your humanness as a person, male or female. I thought how, for example, if I am dressed up like a transgender, how do I convey my feeling of sadness, regret or love?

So, what I did was to video myself taking a shower as a woman and track myself every morning for seven days to see how I have

conveyed that emotion by listening to a sad song. Another project I am thinking about is: If makciks are always acting, and is always on, then how do I turn them off? And then I was thinking okay I can try to make them act and I was tapping on the story of Waktu Batu, the Asian version of Oedipus, in which the mother realized her lover is really her son. And there was a seminal scene I was reading written by Gunawan Maryanto (Teater Garasi) that I wanted to use. But it’s written in poetic literary form, so I rewrite it into simplistic soap opera form. I am trying to create a situation in which I place a makcik and prompt her to act with words of love. By first telling her that I am the lover and then changing the scene telling her that I am now the son. I want to see, without preparation, if in between the scene she may be leaking out information, through the video camera, of what is like to be a man conveying motherliness, conveying love as a woman and rejection as a man. So, those are the themes I keep playing with…

Enin But, are you still using this poetry as point of departure?

Jimmy No, the poetry inform me. So, I am creating a scene to make it happen as a performance.

Enin Because I recall this work by Ming Wong which he actually took several scenes from Pasolini’s movie and he played all the roles. I remembered it quite well. He then picked the scenes where the tension of this gender position and role is very pivotal.

Jimmy Yes, I think I am doing just the antithesis of Ming Wong because he was drag-acting in the entire movie. I want to see if a real situation can come out in between the scene of being a man and a woman. That’s how it is closer to performance art that I am trying to learn from Ferial. Maybe the two of you would like to talk about how shared subject matter of makcik is informing your directions and your work?

Enin Yeah, Ferial, what is your next performance?

Ferial It’s at the screen near the toilet. The video performance I made out of this project. First, I made ID cards, here you can see it (passing around samples to the participants)…

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Grace Fresh from the press…

Ferial They were always talking about ID cards (KTP in Indonesian), being not accepted and everything regarding their identities. Almost all of them have lots of ID cards from the NGOs, communities they’re involved in, etc. I hope this ID can be theirs as Indonesian makciks, independently even they are not involved in any organization. When I brought this to the digital print place, they asked, “Do you have a legal letter for this KTP?” I answered, “No, as you can see, this is not the same with our KTP.”

My first work is this KTPS. Then the performance art video. Both began from what Jimmy explained about how they are being on the stage. I found out that it is very difficult to dress up like them, with the high heels, makeup, fake hair, and everything. After one hour, everything just itches.

Jimmy Did you not say that you are equating your foreignness, or the feeling of awkwardness with them as makciks; having to live that feeling every moment of their lives?

Ferial Well, I don’t know if they can be comfortable with that. I didn’t see it romantically, like, “Oh, the society rejects me.” If they thought that it’s very important to be accepted in the society, what can they do to make society accept them as a makcik? I won’t go to the sad (and dramatic) part, because everything has a reason. I mean some (makciks) who wanted to be accepted by the society survived and succeeded anyway. So, there’s no need to be dramatic.

I also got some kind of a enlightenment from Sonya. She does things that she considers as a way of making the society accept her for who she is. But she won’t push them if they decide not to accept her. As I’ve suspected, the general reason why it’s hard for “the society” to accept them is not only because of their looks, but because of the stigmas that makciks are teasers, sex workers, aggressive, and more and more negative stuff.

Back to how I am seeing all this, if one society does not accept me (for what I am) after I tried being a part of everyone (in that society), explaining to them who and what I am, I will just go and not be a part of that particular society. Simple. I can’t see it as something sad…

Jimmy For me, I see your work parodies their (transgender) situation. However hard they try, they

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only look like women and they are not women… They are like foreign amongst women…

Ferial Well, I don’t go to the gender part. That’s why I didn’t invite them to do the performance themselves. It is me who did the performance, because I wanted to share the same feeling of being alien.

Jimmy Okay, yes.

Ferial I don’t care about their genders, whether they are transgender or not. I am seeing them as human, genderless. Similar like what you (Jimmy) figured out on Lahsita’s makeup corner: beauty is genderless. After we put on makeup on our male visitors, surprisingly they become beautiful! Very beautiful! Even the ones with macho appearances…

Grace Some are even more beautiful (than us girls).

Teresa The best you can give to another human being is to accept them for what they are. Look at them and don’t think of them as makcik or half man, half woman. Accept them for what they are is the best thing you can do for them. And reflect the idea that there is no harm in living on the fringes or being different from other people. Then I think you will then start to build that bridge and communication.

There is a makcik lady I met in Singapore who I keep forgetting that she is a makcik until I kissed her and there would be stubbles. Haha. She has boyfriends, apartment… I just accept her as a girlfriend. There is no matter being on the fringe, just accept them for what they are. Some people just like living on the fringe, it’s like being a fly on the wall, you can be on observation mode. It’s not such a bad thing being a foreigner.

Jimmy We should open to the floor… Lashita you want to say something about your process?

Lashita In this project, I always want to hear from them about themselves. Like Sonya always says, “I am a woman and that’s it!” But the other transgender sometime say, “Yes, in my ID card I am still male, but I am a makcik.” Some of them are still afraid to say that they are makciks because they knew that they would then have no power in the society because of the stigmas. After that, I ask them, “What is the stigma about you?” They replied, “90% of makciks in Jogja are sex workers and the government put them in the same category as homeless and stray kids.” Because of that stigma, they have no power to shout out their statements.

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The makciks’ communities at the Jogja Fashion Week

parade all along Jalan Malioboro. The parade

ended up at Taman Budaya Yogyakarta and, at the time,

the ART|JOG|12 team was doing their installation for

the biggest art fair in Jogja. Ong sees this as the time

where the makciks meet art (and the artists).

Photos taken by Budi ND Dharmawan.

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I found that in different communities, they describe themselves differently. Some of them consider themselves as women, some strictly say that they are transgender, some say that they are women trapped in men’s bodies, etc…

So, I really liked Ferial’s ID card in which they can choose whatever sex they personally believe they are. Could be waria (shemale), priawan (maleshe), man, woman, transgender, androgynous, whatever. (It helps to also map their views on their own sexualities.)

When we invited them to come to the showcase, some of them are really happy because (they think that) this is a good opportunity for them to describe themselves in the way they want to, what they consider as a natural way.

Mostly, newspapers and televisions say things that somehow support the existing stigmas upon them. Generalizes them as men dressing up as women. Devaluing their lives. I feel that the (mass) media are discriminating and hurting them. So, I keep asking again and again, who do you think you are? What do you think you are? Usually, they are struck by the question and cannot immediately answer.

I also found out that in some of them, at some point in their lives when they were young, they look into the mirror say, “Yes, I want be a woman, I want to put on makeup, I want to have a long hair.” So, when I made this makeup corner, actually, I am interested in revealing the stories of how they find themselves as women. Is it from the physical character? Is it because they love their mother? Is it because they want to be their mother? Since I just kept inviting people (no matter it’s man, woman, or transgender) to do makeup here, slowly I see that human character, male or female, is just the same. How beauty is genderless... Really, beauty is genderless.

Ferial Yes, through the interviews and discussions, we found at least three different types of makcik. One is the entertainer type who only does physical change. Two is the ones who changed their mind, … And, then the third one? Jimmy, please…

Jimmy I made three categories with this very “male approach” of breaking things down in categories in order to understand what I am going to do. I thought of looking at all the transgender persons I have encountered and grade them as: “by speech” for transgender in just the external appearance; “by action” for how they behave; and for being a “mind thing”, that even if she doesn’t move, she will be able to relate that femininity to me. And breaking them along the line, grading 0 for male, and 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 upwards for female.

Enin That’s very male-centric.

Jimmy Exactly. Very male-centric and at some point I just drop everything and take them as they are which is really more interesting...

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Ferial Yes…

Unidentified audience What did you get in average?

Jimmy We didn’t get the chance to actually grade because we were so busy in the last week. Haha. Our research has stopped a week ago when we entered this space. We have no more time to interact. I have wanted to involve the two of them (Lashita and Ferial) with colored stickers for grading, to get a more level perspective.

Teresa In your interaction with them, did you find a common thread, in their relationship with the mother and father, for them to gear towards being a makcik? If you would put a finger on it, is it because they lost their mother at a very young age?

Ferial Yes, because most of them ran away from home since they were very young. So everyone has no family, I mean blood-related kind of family.

Teresa They are runaways because?

Ferial Many reasons. Some did in the process of finding their own identities, the

others because their families reject them for who they are…

Enin Is it definite whether it’s from the father’s side or the mother’s side?

Ferial Most of them said parents in general. But, we know that for Sonya it’s different. Her father is okay with who she is, but her mother is not. And, for Mami Tata, when she goes home, which she still does often, she dresses herself and act as a man. She still has a good relationship with her family, though it is as a “he”.

Jimmy We generalize that they come from broken home but it really doesn’t matter how their parents have been…

Enin That relates to social class structure. And it’s not really shown here in the showcase. In my discussion with Lashita, Ferial and Grace, I asked if they have asked the elite kind of group of society. In most cities, I know there are many people.

Jimmy The middle class.

Enin Whether they are protected because (of their) social economic class and how that protected condition translates in social behavior. And I think, that is really missing here.

Sarita Diva at Excelso Cafe, Malioboro Mall.

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Grace The initial interviews that Lashita started, hooked us up with a particular social-economic class of makciks. But, along the way, I think we have discovered several middle-class makciks, for example, Mami Tata and Sonya. They don’t sell their bodies, they work for NGOs, organizations… Mami Tata is even very vocal about being a makcik as a life choice, so that nobody should’ve complaint about the stigma. Just do something. But, we’ve only met two or three of them by far…

Ferial No, someone in the Sorogenen fast-breaking told me, they filled up their form as a NGOs volunteer and still selling their body. So being part of the NGOs is like a trend, self imaging. Of course not everyone. For Ines, for example, she’s very comfortable living in Jogja because there are lots of organizations where she talks and shares…

Grace There is another case. We interviewed Sarita…

Ferial In her case, it’s because her family is rich.

Grace One, his family accepted him for who he is (meaning as their son who dresses up like a daughter). Two, his family is rich enough to pay for him to do his thing. Once we interviewed him further, Jimmy got the sense that gender is not important for him. Jimmy came up with the conclusion that he’s just a man exploiting femininity to make money.

Ferial That’s also her statement…

Jimmy What did Sarita say?Ferial Sarita said, “If it’s still sellable, I will keep doing this.” (We learnt that what Sarita meant as sellable is not merely about selling the physical body, but more to selling the idea that Sarita as a transgender entertainer.)

Grace For Sarita, I don’t think becoming makcik is an issue. All he needs is the attention (and the money that comes with it). He wants to be a true entertainer, no matter if it means that he has to appear and act as a she.

Jimmy Conversely, he is the one that falls in the upper middle class category for the fact that he is not selling his body for money. Because of what he is, he is a very private person. Which speaks for all these middle class makciks. That they have the means to get themselves operated and to keep themselves private for their family’s sake. I think this other category that we are lacking here may not be accessible to us. They do not need to connect to the rest of society.

Ferial For Sarita, the first time I met her was in her house (Ferial was there to lend some stage costumes). She is a very nice person to her neigbors and everybody loves her.

Grace So is Mami Tata and so is Sonya.

Jimmy I have thought that would be the Makcik Project #2 research (audience laughter), but at this point not really interesting yet. We have enough materials to digest for now.

Rosemary Willink I am interested in the format of this platform, which is work-in-progress. And I understand in terms of intention, it’s not necessarily important in this stage to explore ideas. I am confused as to where is the work and if it is about mutually beneficial relationship between artists, I like to know where the work starts. And it it seems to me the experience will continue to inform your work and I like to know the other side. And how at the moment that kind of on-going input goes into challenging your work or what?

Jimmy Grace, you want to say something? Do you mean the method of collaboration?

Malcolm Can I add to this as well, I am thinking the same thing. If this is a documentary project what is the framework that you are documenting? If this is a community development project, where are the transgender people for a start?

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Grace That’s what they haven’t decided upon. What kind of project this is…

Malcolm If this is a personal project, which to me is what it feels like and where the tension lies, then what resolution have you reached? If this is a personal project about you and your intention as an artist, then who has the permission to speak about who? Who am I, who is my community, you know all those things come more complex and are much more interesting. To me this looks like a project about identity? It is fundamentally problematic because you are talking about a group of others. Worse, you are talking about a group of people who aren’t here. Who has the right to do that, what is the point and why would you do that? But I think in that discussion there is something quite interesting.

Jimmy All of your pointing out is great. We have been in our research finding out that we are not really engaging them in a proactive way. As a community effort, our focus group remains a subject matter. That we keep a distance from, that we interview them and bring back the materials to our studio to question and break down. And, we are only just identifying why we are afraid of bringing in our subject matter. Mostly from personal myth, I speak of myself. I am not certain how I may be able to explain the art process to the makciks when they are in front of me, or they may have different criteria for the showcase. But we did try, we did invite them in the last three days to this space, to see their reactions. We are trying to get to them, to perhaps go beyond the passive involvement of the transgender community. So we are still discovering that (process).

I don’t know how with the material gathered so far, for us to discuss and go on from here in a more collaborated and mutually beneficial direction. But so far, it has also been an experiment in collaboration… I do not understand what a residency entails or expects of me, I am going out with a limp. The one comforting thread is that we have started off as three friends, and challenging what Grace has spoke of the impossibility of three egos working in the same household, remain friends.

Grace In the beginning when they asked me to join on board, I said that here are three artists, willing to share, starting with their own practices, to explore the same subject, and heading towards their own directions. It’s a challenge for me to see how they deal with each other and fight everyday. Haha.

Ferial Actually this is my first experience in having a collaboration with other artists. Usually, I do collaborations with other communities or people from different disciplines, which I think is easier to deal with. Haha. In such collaborations, everyone feeds different pieces towards one subject. But in this (case), since everyone is artistic, we fight a lot! Well, we spend a lot of time to talk, discuss and question aesthetic things and the ways to do things. Should we interrupt each other’s (thoughts)? Should we add more (idea) to each other’s (projects)? Those kinds of stuff where in the end we fight for our (separate artistic) opinions…

Jimmy Yes, I think we are like three synchronized swimmers in a swimming pool, but the water is the makcik… and we have not synchronize yet or know what to do with the water...

Ferial Yes, but this is interesting… I can feel how the three of us try to bond.

Malcolm My question is not a criticism. I am fascinated by this. I can see that the tension is palpable. But it’s really hard to pinpoint what it is. I know you were at one point the assistant and then the collaborator. To you what is the tension between the assistant and the collaborator? What do you feel about that and how that resolve itself?

Ferial I am the last one who confirmed. Until Jimmy arrived, I still haven’t decides to be part of this collaboration.

Malcolm Why did it take you a long time?

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Ferial I am afraid with the commitment. As an artist, I’m not sure whether it will be successful or not, to work with other artists. Haha, because artists are too sensitive. Many of them do not say what they think. Some get angry if the others disagree on what they think is best. Just like in the art school. It is really difficult to talk to my classmates about their art practices. So, I always think that it is difficult to collaborate (with other artists). But I was wrong. With Lashita and Jimmy, we worked in very open-minded environment. It trains me to dare to say whatever without having to behave too much (caution)…

Malcolm I personally don’t think there is a right way to collaborate with others…only a wrong way ... but that you have to do the wrong way first forcefully. I think trying to walk around each other and say the right thing to each other becomes a problem. But everyone goes straight forward and feel confident in what they are doing comes up with all sort of fruitful…

Ferial It’s not just about being confident, especially during the fights… It’s hard to face it, but I feel more comfortable in the end.

Lashita I feel this collaboration is adding more (documentation)...

Lashita This is my fifth experience in collaborating and I find this as the most interesting one! We actually talk, we share our knowledge and we share everything here. Maybe it’s because we are all women. Haha.

Ferial It’s fast-breaking time already! Thank you and do check our Makcik Project website.

Grace Thank you all for coming!

* We added the bracketed (text) because this logbook does not show the exhibits that we presented in our showcase that we have pointed out to the audience during the talk. Other add-ons are meant for readability. –Eds. Log on to http://makcikproject.tumblr.com

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After the talk and discussion session, we invited the makciks for a fast breaking, to thank them for helping us

by far and to listen to what they think about our progress.

During the meeting, Ong told us this story: There was a man in India. He was a monk. He lived in the time of Buddha. One day, he dreamt of his mother who have died. He dreamt that his mother is in hell. In the dream, he went into a fire to

save his mom. But the mother was very hungry. So he gave his mother some food. But, his mother cannot eat because she has a very small throat. And, there were many hungry

ghosts around her. So he asked Buddha, what should he do. The Buddha answered, “On the seventh month, when its full moon, make offerings for the hungry ghosts and also include

food and water so that your mother can eat something too.” So from then on, every full moon in the seventh month, in Taiwan, China, Hong Kong, Thailand, Japan,

Vietnam, Singapore, celebrate the Hungry Ghost Festival. In Singapore, people would go out of their houses to pray

and put food on the street for the hungry ghosts. They also this ritual for their deceased family ancestors in their home.

Outside the house, they do it for unknown deceased who don’t have descendants. So, this ritual is not religious. When

Sonya told me that last year she lost 13 (makcik) friends because of HIV, I feel that I should do this ritual. Especially

because gay men [people like me], babies and makcik have no descendants. While making an offering for the hungry

ghost, you are also giving up your desire.

In the beginning of our showcase, Ong invited Afiff, Situmorang, and some other friends to join him do the

ritual at iCAN. He wanted to respect the “lonely” deceased makciks through the ritual. Generally, the hungry ghost

ritual is not something new in Ong’s body of works (eg. Portable Prayer, 2002). Within the framework of

this project, Ong offers the idea that this communal participatory ritual is something that the makciks

could independently organize for themselves. Ong has succesfully made the collaborators took part in the ritual.

Just as easy the makcik agrees to participate after Ong mentioned the story above.

On the last day of our iCAN showcase, Ullambana (2012) happened as an event that made the collaborators, the

curator, the participating audiences and the makciks gathered together and paid respect to deceased makciks.

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After breakfasting with the makciks at the iCAN space at the end of the showcase.Photo taken by Nala Nandana.

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Red District ProjectOlivia Sonya ArestaAntariksa, Titarubi, Nala Nandana (and the iCAN team)Rismiliana WijayantiBudi ND DharmawanRatna Mufida (Hyphen)Andrew Lumban Gaol (Anti-Tank Project)Jean-Pascal ElbazGunawan MaryantoAstrid RezaSofyan HidayatOctalyna Puspa WardanyBayu Arya Setiawan (Jangkrik Antique)Farah Wardani Satriagama Rakantaseta (Heri Pemad Art Management)Kusnin (Duma Transport)Ryan BarkerSukma Bharata (a.k.a. Mami Tata), Renita Pelangi,Tamara Pertamina, Angel (and the Sorogenen Community)Lotus CommunityShinta Ratri (IWAYO)Maryani (Pondok Pesantren Senin-Kamis)All “Finding Beauty” makeover participants

All images belong to the three collaborators except mentioned. Logbook editor Grace Samboh | Design & layout Hyphen | Administration Rismiliana Wijayanti

Makcik Project is funded by www.SITARR.org

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