Moving on from

Narcissistic AbuseDue to Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD)

By Jeni Mawter

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=186004684914075&set=a.119863101528234.19520.119720174875860&type=3&theater

http://southpawbeagle.files.wordpress.com/2010/04/pills-darling.gif?w=500

Alon Gratch, If Love Could Think: Using Your Mind to Guide Your Heart, Harmony Books, New York, 2005, Page 37

“If you are a giving, supportive

person who avoids center

stage and thrives on taking care of others you are at

risk for Narcissistic Love”

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-btiwz-nNVqo/UNIKCW2OvgI/AAAAAAAABGk/KMO_I6PHMro/s1600/dewdrop.jpg

Whether you were born into a NPD family

http://etc.usf.edu/clipart/24600/24664/spider_web_24664_lg.gif

Chose a relationship with an NPD person

http://img1.etsystatic.com/000/0/5728230/il_fullxfull.352201779.jpg?ref=l2

Or met your NPD in some other place

http://kourkenko.deviantart.com/art/Call-of-Cthulhu-Legs-353855894

You have experienced Narcissistic Abuse

http://www.culteducation.com/dvds/heart.jpg

In the beginning you don’t recognize it as Narcissistic Abuse

You just know ‘something is wrong’

http://dearoptimists.files.wordpress.com/2012/01/happy-2.png

It takes a long time to see the ‘cycle’ or repeated ‘patterns’ of abuse

http://www.skewsme.com/img/cycle_of_abuse.jpg http://theadventurouswriter.com/quipstipsrelationships/ wp-content/uploads/2011/06/Cycle-of-Abuse.jpg

So the abuse goes on and on

http://www.caring.com/blogs/caring-currents/prolonged-grief

You wonder if you’re going crazy ?

http://funny-fun-fun.com/funny-demotivational-posters/not-crazy-just-special-funny-pictures/

You lose your sense of selfhttp://s3.amazonaws.com/rapgenius/1375494209_i_don_t_know_who_i_am_by_wasted49-d65uw4o.jpg

You lose your trust in others

http://socialinfluenceconsultinggroup.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/Trust-Crisis.jpg

You lose your trust in your own judgements and perceptions

http://creativeeveryday.com/images/400/orangeline.jpg

You no longer believe your past It is built on lies and deceit

http://picchore.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/real-eyes.jpg

People you considered important, no longer count

http://www.cs.iastate.edu/~andorfc/people.JPG

You lose your dreams for your future

http://rosalindadeleon.files.wordpress.com/2010/08/the20future.jpg

You lose your belief inhuman decency

http://www.becauseart.com/images/diverse_humanity.jpg

You must acknowledge and grieve these losses

http://patriciabrunnerphd.com/images/leafwater.jpg

You may have signs of Complex Post Traumatic Stress

http://cdn2-b.examiner.com/sites/default/files/styles/image_content_width/hash/10/6d/106d1bb7d1739e0f901d765b0d1d448a.jpg?itok=YPfbuH0p

You are often exhaustedhttp://thelovenotebook.tumblr.com/page/14

Remember “Knowledge is Power”http://www.dontforgettothink.com/myimages/knowledge_is_power.jpg

With power you can change

http://www.insiderquarterly.com/knowledge-is-power

https://d26houopdteji.cloudfront.net/images/q/thumb/x598%3E/quality/85/interlace/true/src/http%3A%2F%2Fjux-user-files-prod.s3.amazonaws.com%2F2013%2F08%2F21%2F23%2F03%2F59%2F554%2Ftumblr_mqxu8vru831qm3r26o1_400.jpg

Change Your

Thinking

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Adh6j6oqLes/Ufff3p2dV-I/AAAAAAAAC9o/cEkAZrT9NxU/s1600/Marianne-Williamson-quote.jpg

Stop trying to change the NPD

into something they’re not

http://www.critteroos.com/demo/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/leoduck-338x279.jpg

Stop trying to fix the NPD Relationship

http://covermyfb.com/media/covers/thumb/sSDJpdiZ70PorVs1.jpg

You can’t cure a NPD with love or attentionhttp://www.pwnage.ro/wp-content/uploads/2009/11/epic-love-fail.jpg

Stop feeling sorry for the NPD

http://fc04.deviantart.net/fs70/i/2013/019/5/2/gloomy_and_pity_by_cupcakebutcher-d5s0hq9.jpg

Are you a Highly Sensitive Person? Then you’re a likely source for

Narcissistic Supply

http://farm6.static.flickr.com/5222/5685196984_958dfda0d3.jpg

Are you a Codependent?

http://www.foh.hhs.gov/eapnews/consortium/images/codependent.jpg

Are you hoping for ‘Happily Ever After’ ?

http://farm6.static.flickr.com/5222/5685196984_958dfda0d3.jpg

Still believe in super heroes?http://piximus.net/media/1752/retired-and-old-superheroes-8.jpg

And that the good guy always wins?

http://onestophumour.com/uploads/good_guy_harry_8045478621.jpg

Think again … http://livenerddierepeat.files.wordpress.com/2012/05/how-a-bad-guy-dies-in-the-wasteland.jpg

www.roadkilltshirts.com

Take back your control

http://thelovenotebook.tumblr.com/page/47

Change your mindset

http://www.anonymousartofrevolution.com/2013/06/if-you-dont-control-your-mind-someone.html

Realize you fell for an illusion

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-eTasg6PL1UQ/Tha-FZDlk1I/AAAAAAAAADU/lvKsJpIYN90/s320/Masks.jpg

http://mikehoolboom.com/thenewsite/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/tumblr_mk83e16rEP1qzr6ooo1_500.jpg

Grieve the relationship you never had

http://thelovenotebook.tumblr.com/page/55

Why did you fall for an NPD?

http://images5.fanpop.com/image/photos/24800000/Opposites-Attract-tdis-duncan-and-courtney-24829236-1424-674.png

The NPD identified your inner wounds

http://itakeoffthemask.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/03/1091652_asian_autumn_3.jpg

The NPD told your wounded inner child

exactly what it wanted to hear and you felt great

http://www.edsia.net/_Media/pastedgraphic_17-13_med.png

Feeling‘Great’becomesyour ChemicalAddictionhttp://3.bp.blogspot.com/

-HiWgnyCzqzE/UG3PTik4RLI/

AAAAAAAAJHg/1B-RPxVv1go/

s1600/brain+chemicals.jpg

www.teens.drugabuse.gov

http://thelovenotebook.tumblr.com

To move on from Narcissistic Abuse

You must work on your wounds and chemical addiction

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-c5pBNSJRHfg/Tv8fVfz8MaI/AAAAAAAACVo/ku-IiVEi0qw/s400/bandaid1.png

Why were you drawn to the NPD’s charisma ?

http://celeitydachshund.files.wordpress.com/2012/10/cool-wiener-dog-sunglasses.jpg

Beware “The Halo Effect”

It clouds our judgement

http://www.crazywebsite.com/Website-Clipart-Pictures-Videos/Halloween_Clip_Art/Halloween_Costumes_Pets_Angel_Devil_Dachshunds-1.JPG

NPDs are ‘A soul with no footprints’ Caution: Quote by Invicta Ma, 28 Jan 2009

http://farm2.staticflickr.com/1127/5148224080_7b4acaf514_b.jpg

No empathy, sympathy, remorse. http://th00.deviantart.net/fs70/300W/i/2010/144/d/6/Heartless_and_Soulless_by_MyLittleDuckie1116.jpg

You are a soul with your own thoughts, fears, hopes, spirit, future,

dreams

http://payload.cargocollective.com/1/0/128/14564/ARAMRP2.jpg

The NPD must feed off your soul

You are the strawberry

www.littleblogoflettinggo.com

You ask ‘Should I let them go?’

www.themoonlover.blogspot.com

Let them go

Letting go means gaining control http://www.zengardner.com/files/Letting-Go-Open-Hands.jpg

Why give the abuser control ofyour power, your energy, your

life?

http://fc01.deviantart.net/fs12/f/2006/330/8/2/_Megalomaniac__by_HomeBass.jpg

Change your expectations

Do not expect: … an NPD to make sense

http://wp.patheos.com.s3.amazonaws.com/blogs/unreasonablefaith/files/2012/01/thomas-paine-arguing-600x305.jpg

Do not expect:… validation from an NPD

http://funnythings247.com/page/di/didn-t-really-meant-to-hurt-you.html

Change your expectations

Do not expect:… an NPD to take the blame

http://fc09.deviantart.net/fs71/i/2011/341/7/0/all_your_fault_by_mokithewolf-d4iggs6.png

Do not expect:… an NPD to compromise

http://images.sodahead.com/polls/003846865/300255638_my_way_answer_3_xlarge.gif

Change your expectations

Do not expect: … an NPD to be responsible

http://rlv.zcache.com/its_not_my_fault_post_card-rb99fb4e7c36949d8861bfafceecff491_vgbaq_8byvr_512.jpg

Do not expect:… an NPD to apologize

http://images.sodahead.com/polls/001341047/i_m_sorry_answer_3_xlarge.jpeg

Set boundarieshttp://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/11/99/b5/1199b509ae0f1445f4fd5fad0632bcf7.jpg

Limit contact, set clear boundaries

or use a mediator

http://www.heritage-tech.net/images/initial-overlaps.png

Apply the ‘No Contact’ rule http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-VM1LvxHeZRY/UMEEhrbpVhI/AAAAAAAAAQM/KXTNCeliQw8/s400/Don-t-give-up-on-writing-writing-31408863-640-520.jpg

No Contact means …

http://balancejoyanddelicias.files.wordpress.com/2010/08/no.gif

No emailsNo phonesNo lettersNo instant messagingNo communication via a 3rd party

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-2SqJpoAze_4/TfbOabBITOI/AAAAAAAACHY/vFhi0TysLFQ/s1600/panda+mean+copy.jpg

The NPD keeps coming back because of an insatiable need for

Narcissistic Supply

http://friendsoftype.com/2012/09/insatiable/

An NPD person won’t let you go

no matter how hard you fight

http://www.lubpedia.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/Funny-Valentines-Day-Wallpaper-2.jpg

Stop the Cycle of Abuse Stop being the source of Narc

Supply

AttentionAdulationComplimentsAdmirationSubservienceShowing fearLiking themBeing manipulatedBeing deceived ww.educationviews.org

Reclaim your Inner peace …

http://injusticebydesign.files.wordpress.com/2013/08/wowmorebullshit.jpg

… or suffer the consequences

Is this what you truly want?

http://www.mayanrocks.com/blog/sylviaplath-desire-destroy.gif

The NPD abuser always returns It is part of the ‘cycle’and need

for Supply

http://mymorningmeditations.files.wordpress.com/2012/08/what-doesnt-kill-you.jpg

Ignore NPD tools of manipulation

Guilt

Fear

Pity

Threats

Violence

Blackmail

Financial abuse

Character Assassination http://img.gawkerassets.com/img/182n8u0ce8lxgjpg/ku-bigpic.jpg

Build and educate your support network

http://lifecoachsn.angelfire.com/images/coachlogo.gif

Arm and educate yourself/others about High Conflict Divorce

Protect yourAssets

http://www.cursio.com.au/thumbnaillarge/10.jpg

Stop blaming yourself The Narcissistic Abuse has

happened!

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=194702810710929&set=a.119863101528234.19520.119720174875860&type=3&theater

Prepare for a Marathon Efforthttp://farm6.staticflickr.com/5019/5482504987_3010db9dae_z.jpg

http://thelovenotebook.tumblr.com/page/55

Please share these other links on Narcissistic Personality Disorder

 http://www.slideshare.net/jenimawter/red-flags-to-narcissistic-personality-disorder-compiled-by-jeni-mawter

http://www.slideshare.net/jenimawter/narcissistic-victim-syndrome-a-powerpoint-by-jeni-mawter