Overcoming an Unforgiving Heart

Restoring Relationships – Part 3

Forgiveness is NOT…A Feeling

About Forgetting

Excusing

Forgiveness IS…A Decision

Costly

Reflects God’s Heart

4 Promises of Forgiveness

1/ I will not dwell on this incident

2/ I will not bring up this incident again and again and use it against you

3/ I will not talk to others about this incident

4/ I will not let this incident stand between us or hinder our personal relationship

RELATIONSHIPS MATTER

Debbie Morris, Forgiving a Dead Man Walking Video Clip

Debbie Morris, Forgiving a Dead Man Walking Video Clip

Debbie Morris, Forgiving a Dead Man Walking Video Clip

Debbie Morris, Forgiving a Dead Man Walking Video Clip

Debbie Morris, Forgiving a Dead Man Walking Video Clip

1/ Confirm Repentance

Have I clearly explained to the other person how I have been hurt? Do they understand how they hurt me?

2/ Renounce your own sinful attitudes or expectations.

“But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” (Romans 5:8, NIV)

2/ Renounce your own sinful attitudes or expectations.

Am I holding on to unrealistic expectations?

3/ Honestly assess my contribution to the problem.

“Do not judge others, and you will not be judged. For you will be treated as you treat others. The standard you use in judging is the standard by which you will be judged. And why worry about a speck in your friend’s eye when you have a log in your own? How can you think of saying to your friend, ‘Let me help you get rid of that speck in your eye,’ when you can’t see past the log in your own eye? Hypocrite! First get rid of the log in your own eye; then you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend’s eye.” (Matthew 7:1-5, NLT)

3/ Honestly assess my contribution to the problem.

Have I taken specific ownership of how I contributed to the conflict? (ie my attitudes and actions)

4/ Recognise that God is working for good.

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” (Romans 8:28, NIV)

4/ Recognise that God is working for good.

Do I believe that God can transform all things for good?

5/ Remember God’s forgiveness.

"Do you see this woman? I came into your house. You did not give me any water for my feet, but she wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair. You did not give me a kiss, but this woman, from the time I entered, has not stopped kissing my feet. You did not put oil on my head, but she has poured perfume on my feet. Therefore, I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven—for she loved much. But he who has been forgiven little loves little." Then Jesus said to her, "Your sins are forgiven." (Luke 7:44-48, NIV)

5/ Remember God’s forgiveness.

Am I still amazed at how God has forgiven me?

6/ Draw on God’s strength

“I can do everything through him who gives me strength.” (Philippians 4:13, NIV)

6/ Draw on God’s strength

Am I drawing on God’s strength

Loving God, I confess that I have lived as if you did not matter, and as if I mattered most. I have not honoured your name in my words or my actions.

My worship and prayers have fallen short. I have not let your love have its way with me, so my love for others has failed.

There are those whom I have hurt and there are those whom I have failed to help. Forgive me.

(Share specifically those things that are troubling you)

I am sorry for all this, and ask for grace. I want to do better.

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