Presented by: Samantha Van Beever, Marcel Martin and Maria Costa

Stopping Bullying in our Schools:

Tough Questions for Educators

Educators can look for signs that distinguish bullying from friendly teasing and horseplay: First: Bullying is unwanted, deliberate, persistent, and relentless, creating a power imbalance between perpetrator's and victims. Second: Victim blame is a key component, and it is used to justify social exclusion from the peer group. Victims might be excluded for looking different; for being homosexual or lesbian; or simply appearing to be gay. They might be teased about their clothes, accent or appearance; or for being intelligent, gifted and talented, or having special needs and/or disabilities (Hoff, L. & Shariff, S. 2007).

How can an Educator tell if it is Bullying or Teasing?

• Lack of parent attention at the home, could be due to drugs, alcohol, divorce

•Adult role model is a bully, parents teachers, coaches are all models

•Low self esteem so bullying makes them feel better

• lack empathy

Helping educators understand why kids are bullies may help them understand the bully:

Media has painted an image in our minds of what a bully and a victim should look like:

The bully is the tough, muscular jock that threatens to beat up the scrawny nerd. However, neither the victims nor the perpetrators of bullying fit into any stereotypical profile.

Researches have discovered that bullies compensate for their weaknesses and lack of confidence with aggression.

Even though kids are often targeted because of their

appearance, there is no way to characterize a victim, since virtually anyone can become a target (Lam & Zhao, 2011).

Who is the Stereotypical Bully and Victim?

What are the most common types of bullying educators should look for?

• Verbal – put-downs and malicious gossip

• Physical – harming someone or their personal property

• Emotional – social shunning and sabotage

• Electronic – hurtful Internet images, chatroom gossip, text messaging, harassing phone calls

In a study exploring high school students’ beliefs and behaviors

associated with cyberbullying, several themes emerged from the analysis,

which uncovers some important patterns (Quing, 2011):

• 15% said the situation got better

• 6% said it got worse

• Two in five students never told anyone

• Nothing changed for 40% of the students

• Only 2.1% students reported that school adults tried to help

In the same study, participants were asked if they would report the incident to a school

counselor, teacher, or administrator.

Less than 18% responded “Probably yes”, and a staggering 80% answered “No” (Quing, 2011).

• Schools have the right to punish a student for bullying if

done on school grounds and/or interrupting class learning

•Students can be required to sign a “acceptable use policy”

agreeing to acceptable use of the internet.

•Staff members may make general inspections of school

computers and internet accounts. They may make more

specific searches of computers or accounts in cases when

they have reason to suspect content that either (a) is illegal

or (b) may provide evidence of activities that are illegal or

violate school rules (Stoel, 2011).

What are the Legal Considerations for Teachers?

• All fifty states have instituted zero-tolerance

policies against bullying. However this “one size

fits all” approach is inflexible, harsh and lacking

in common sense. What is needed are procedures

to support the policy that provide opportunities

for administrators to exercise fairness, common

sense, and sound discretion (Coloroso, 2008).

• If bullying occurs off school property and

is not interfering with classroom activities,

the school cannot impose consequences for

the student who is bullying another

student.

What can a teacher do to be a positive role model

for bullies?

•One thing that teachers can do, yet is often hard, is focus

on the positive. •Have open discussion in the

classroom about social responsibility, model the discussion

and make sure to listen to all students.

•Give bully some leadership responsibilities, but give them guidance and understanding of

their impact. •Don’t give up or “get frustrated”, often this is exactly what bullies get from home. Give praise and find the positive and don’t set

them up to fail.

Unfortunately, unless a bully receives help, much of the behavior continues and ends up in a continues cycle. Our job as educators is to help the bully so

they no longer feel the need to victimize others. “In order to help a bully, the bully must understand that they are emotionally wounded. They require a safe

environment in which to open up and talk about their feelings so they can heal from their hurt and

relinquish their issues of mistrust.” (Costa and Mendoza, 2013)

•Managing Impulsivity – Impulsive behavior is a reaction to a given situations without thinking thoughtfully. Bullies can be taught to “think before they act.” • Listening with Understanding and Empathy – Bullies can set goals for themselves to understand others. They need help in understanding not only those that they bully, but possibly the adults that are bullying them. • Think Interpedently - Bullies need to see themselves as a part of something, and shift independent mind set to interdependent. Realizing they are a part of a group that may have a common goal.

What can educators do to help students solve conflict? The following are several simple but powerful rules for turning enemies into friends you can

pass on to your students.

1. Refuse to give people the power to get you angry. Anger is the main reason we become victims of bullying. It feels like others make us angry, but we really do it to ourselves. We get angry because we want people to stop abusing us, but it makes them continue.

2. Give people freedom of speech. When you try to stop people from saying nasty things to you, they continue. When you permit them, they stop. Even when they are insulting or cursing you, respond as if they are trying to tell you something valuable.

3. Don’t be afraid. We fear enemies. Plus, fear gives people power over us, so they will continue doing what scares us. But if we treat them like friends, we don’t need to fear them because they won’t want to hurt us.

4. Don’t defend yourself. We defend ourselves from enemies, and we lose because the defensive position is the weaker one, so they will continue attacking.

5. Don’t attack. Even if people attack you first, don’t retaliate. Then they’ll probably stop attacking you. But if you retaliate, they now feel justified retaliating against you.

6. If people hurt you, let them know you are hurt, but don’t get angry. You want people to feel bad when they hurt you. But if you get angry with them, they will get angry back. If you just let them know how they hurt you, they will probably feel bad and apologize. If people are mad at you, realize that it is because they feel you hurt them. So ask them how you hurt them, and if appropriate, apologize.

7. Don’t tell on people. Getting people in trouble is one of the meanest things you can do. If you are having a problem with people, they will like and respect you more if you talk to them directly. Only tell when it’s an emergency or because you want to be taught how to handle the problem on your own.

(Kalman, P.2)

Yes! Many websites share videos of

students standing up to bullies.

Show all students parts of everyday shows that they may

watch were bullying takes place and discuss it, or use Meetups

where students can see all responses.

Use Facebook to start a “Not in Our School”

Campaign.

Make all students aware of “Cyberbully Hotline.”

http://www.cyberbullyhotline.com/

Have students make movies on how they would

want to be treated at school.

Use school’s website to help circulate support materials and websites

that inform parents about bullying and attach

website’s for students seeking help.

What are some activities that can be done with students to spread awareness

against bullying?

What does bullying feel like? Look like? Sound like? Discuss in small groups and share responses with the class.

http://www.edu.gov.mb.ca/k12/safe_schools/nims/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=56&Itemid=103&limit=1&limitstart=0

Activity 1: The Senses of Bullying

Draw (or obtain) a rough map of the school and school grounds. Have students indicate any spots where they feel unsafe. Is there something that could be done to create a safer environment? Who could help?

Activity 2: Hot Spots

Distribute to each student a stereotype card that has a message on it. Students should hold their card on their forehead without looking at it. Students interact treating each other according to the stereotype. After five minutes, ask students to group themselves with those they think they would hang out with. In these groups, students guess their stereotyped character and then look at their cards. Students then discuss how they felt about the way they were being treated. SAMPLE CARDS: Bully – be afraid; Loner – ignore me; Popular – try to be my friend; Loser – make fun of me; Rich – agree with me; Funny – laugh with me; Different – laugh at me; Good looking – flirt with me; Really nice – be my friend; etc.

Activity 3: Stereotypes

a) Trace a life-size outline of a person on paper and introduce the students to their new “classmate.” Explain that new students often have a difficult time fitting in. b) Invite the students, one at a time, to say something mean to their new classmate. Each time a mean thing is said, tear off a piece of the paper classmate and hand it to the person who made the comment (make sure you rip large chunks). c) After everyone has had a chance to say something mean, they must apologize. As they apologize, they must tape their piece back in its proper place. When they are finished, discuss how the student will never be quite the same even though they apologized. They hurt their classmate’s feelings and the scars remain.

Activity 4: “The New Student”

What would a bully-free school look like? Feel like? Sound like? In pairs, create a poster showing some of the images and ideas discussed.

Activity 5: A Bully-Free School

Safe Teen: A Life Skills and Violence Prevention Program

by Anita Roberts

www.safeteen.ca

Offers an in depth look at issues and skills such as:

•How to access inner strength and form healthy relationships.

•The importance of building and respecting boundaries.

•How to deal with bullying and sexual harassment.

•The importance of embracing differences and understanding the

roots of racism, sexism, and homophobia.

What are some examples of programs addressing the prevention of teen violence that have been

implemented in schools?

Personal and Social Responsibility and Mastering Anger

A two-part curriculum series for middle and high school students

www.iasd.com

These courses address the following:

•Developing self-discipline

• Identifying the consequences before taking action

• Recognizing the impact of the student’s actions on others

• Getting what the student wants in ways that maintain dignity

and respect for himself and others

• Mastering anger, not surrendering to it

• Resolving conflicts peacefully