my "stop doing" list experiment
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Post on 22-Jan-2018
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My Stop Doing List Experiment
Marquita Herald Emotionally Resilient Living
Some say To Do lists dont work, that a better way to go is to create
a Stop Doing list. Ive always been a list maker, so I decided to give this a try, but I wanted it to
be something that would go beyond a simple list. I wanted to make a statement that expressed
feelings and intentions. My journal proved to be the
perfect tool. See what you think, and maybe come up with a few
of your own!
SPENDING TIME WITH THE WRONG
Life is too short to spend time with people who are
unsupportive, disregard my feelings, dismiss my dreams, and generally suck the energy out of me. They may be good
people, they just arent good FOR me.
PUTTING MYSELF LAST
I enjoy being there for the people in my life. The bigger issue is that Ive allowed the
needs of others to repeatedly take priority over my own. Ive finally come to understand that
caring for myself isnt being selfish, its critical to my health,
happiness and emotional well-being.
STORING MENTAL CLUTTER
For too long I have been carrying the baggage of past
regrets, unresolved emotional issues, and grudges. But I am DONE allowing this clutter
to weigh me down. I will resolve what I can, purge what I cant, and free myself to find peace so I can focus on the things
and people that really matter.
LOOKING FOR QUICK FIXES
Looking for quick fixes and short cuts has become a habit.
The problem is they seldom work, at least not for long. And sometimes, they make things worse. From now on Im going
to fix my problems the right way, the first time. I will not only achieve better results, I will grow stronger and more
confident in the process.
LETTING EVENTS DEFINE ME
I cant control everything that happens to me, but I can control
how I respond. From now on I will claim it all - the joy and the
heartache, the successes and the failures. Instead of obstacles, I
choose to see these events as priceless experiences along an amazing journey to grow into
the powerful person I am meant to be.
SAYING I DONT HAVE ENOUGH TIME
The truth is I make time for the things that I consider priorities,
even if its just responding to the people yelling the loudest for my attention. Blaming lack
of time just makes inaction easier to justify, especially to myself. ENOUGH! Its time to
get real about what my priorities have been, and what
I want them to be going forward.
LOOKING TO OTHERS TO MAKE ME HAPPY
Its not the job of other people to make me happy, anymore
than it is my job to make others happy. I am responsible for my
own happiness. If I spend all my time trying to make everyone happy, everyone will be happy but me! The best thing I can do to contribute to the happiness
of others, is to be a happy person myself.
SETTLING FOR LESS THAN I DESERVE
Its surprisingly easy to grow accustom to settling for less. A simple compromise here and
there turns into the new norm, and once you settle in one area of your life it becomes so much
easier to settle in others. But Im done settling because I deserve
better then a life that is simply good enough.
WAITING TO LIVE
Too much of life is spent waiting to live. Waiting until were ready, waiting for the
right people or circumstances, waiting for permission to do,
be and have what we want. But no one is going to magically
swoop in and give me permission to finally go for it! Its time to name what I want,
claim it, and OWN it!
TAKING SMALL MOMENTS FOR GRANTED
No question, life can feel awfully serious at times. But occasionally all the right bits
and pieces come together and just for one small,
magical moment, there isnt a care in the world. I suspect
its possible to experience more of these moments if
we open ourselves to it. Im going to give it a try!
BEING AFRAID TO ASK FOR HELP
Call it pride, fear of being obligated, lack of trust.
Whatever. I know Im not the only one who dreads having to ASK for help. But Ive tried it,
and it wasnt so bad. In fact, Ive discovered that most people genuinely want to help. Ive
discovered something else, we dont get extra credit
for going it alone in life.
TRYING TO CHANGE PEOPLE
One of the hardest lessons Ive had to learn is that other people arent always going to behave the way I want them to. I really only have control over my feelings, beliefs and actions. I can show
others the way I want to be treated, but they will do what they are going to do. Its up to me to accept them as they are,
or walk away.
Change is hard. The uncertainty, the discomfort of having to learn
new things, let new people into my life, and worry over all the things that could go wrong. Ive felt all
these things, but Ive also seen that the times in my life when Ive grown
the most have been during times of change. So Im going to stop resisting and welcome change with open arms. BRING IT ON!
Worry is exhausting and yet there's a false sense of comfort because it feels like Im doing what I need to do to come up
with a solution to a problem one that rarely exists beyond my fertile imagination. This
is a destructive habit that I am committed to breaking by
learning to manage thoughts and emotions, and developing my
problem solving skills.
LISTENING TO SELF-LIMITING
Its so easy to do. You tell yourself that youre just being cautious, that youre not quite ready yet. I finally realized Ive
been holding back, that the barriers to achieving my
dreams have been within me all along and its time to
THINKING ITS TOO LATE
As long as Im still breathing and able to write these words,
then it is not too late to go after what I want.
WHAT DO YOU THINK?
What would you add to your own Stop Doing list that would
liberate you to focus on the things and people that matter
most to you?
Emotionally Resilient Living
Insights, focus and inspiration to unleash your inner strength and put "you" unapologetically
in charge of your life.