by pia ault - caballus consulting...often adhd children are highly creative (and hyper-empathic)...
TRANSCRIPT
by Pia Ault
Your child is not brokenHow to Manage ADHD Symptoms Through the Way of the Horse
©Pia Ault, 2016
All Rights Reserved, except where otherwise noted.
“Horses and children, I often think,have a lot of the good sense there is in the world”.
~ Josephine Demott Robinson
CON T E N T S
1 LET 'S FOCUS ON THE LACK OF FOCUS
2 YOUR CHILD IS TALKING A LANGUAGE YOUNEED TO UNDERSTAND!
3 YOUR CHILD COULD BE THE KEY TO EARTH 'SSURVIVAL
4 WHAT TO DO WHEN YOUR LITTLE GREENHULK EMERGES
3
Hello and Welcome!
If you are reading this, chances are you have searched endlessly for an ADHD
“cure” or a way to “fix" your hyper-active child, only to be overwhelmed by
all the resources and contradicting information. So as a parent, how do you
know where to begin?
Life with an ADD/ADHD can be frustrating and overwhelming, but as a parent
there is a lot you can do to help manage and reduce the symptoms. You can
help your child overcome daily challenges, channel his or her energy into
positive areas, and bring greater calm to your family. The earlier and more
consistently you address your child’s obstacles, the greater chance they have
for success in life. The more involved your whole family is (i.e. mom, dad,
siblings, and grandparents) the better your child will feel about belonging and
overcoming stigmas associated with the disorder.
I specialize in helping ADHD families overcome the struggles that often get in
the way of family harmony. The work often includes horses. This eBook is
about this powerful work with horses. Each story reflects real work with a
client and the horses. Where required, for privacy and confidentiality, the name
of each individual has been changed, or I have obtained approval to use the real
name. For ease, I also use "ADHD" in place of both ADD & ADHD.
Personally, I have spent 30 years with a spouse who has ADD. Both of my sons
have inattentive ADD & ADHD respectively. Not knowing anything about
ADHD in the early 1990’s drove me to research hundreds of online and offline
resources for how to best help them deal with their special wiring. For it is
indeed special wiring. My sons used to tell me they felt their brain was like
spaghetti. Fortunately both boys (now young adults) are successfully studying
at university, because of their determination and because we raised them with
patience, love and compassion.
INTRODUCTION
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WHAT GO T YOU H E R E
ADHD children generally have deficits in their executive function (the ability
to think and plan ahead, organize, focus, control impulses and stay
on/complete tasks). You may have noticed something amiss at age 3-4
when your child wanted to sit quietly during dinner; wanted to make their
room tidy and organized; wanted to do everything you asked them—but
they just did not know how to make these things happen.
Having ADHD can be just as frustrating as dealing with someone who has it,
so if you keep this in mind, it will be a lot easier to respond to your child in
positive, supportive ways. With patience, compassion, and plenty of support,
you can manage childhood ADHD while enjoying a stable, happy home.
ADHD children are often distracted by the smallest things that others tune
out. They don’t have the ability or choice to filter information because that
part of their brain is affected due to ADHD. Sound is not the only sense
affected. Sight, touch, smell and other sensory information can bother and
distract the child.
My oldest son used to get distracted by other students writing on paper
with a lead pencil. The soft scratching sound that others typically tune out
sounded like a loud machine to him and it prevented him from focusing on
his own writing. Now, at university, he has to have music in the background
as a distraction to help him focus. This is a very typical paradox for many
ADHD teens. They can also hyper focus, as you may have observed if your
child is playing a video game or drawing art work. Certain things they are
passionate about can hold their attention for hours.
CHAPTER 1
5
L E T ' S F O CU S ON T H E F O CU S
As if sensory input is not enough of a distraction, the child’s own thoughts
interfere too. Many kids end up daydreaming and get lost in their own world
which to them may mean an escape.
Checking in with your child or a gentle nudge on his arm may be enough to
shake him out of this state and get him back to the task at hand.
Another way to ‘nudge’ and help improve your child’s ability to focus and stay
on task is through Equine Assisted Learning (EAL) – which is a series of
activities with horses, on the ground, designed to increase self-awareness,
spatial boundaries and communications through non-verbal body language.
How does that work? Well, for starters, horses are very sensitive beings and
have a calming effect on people. ADHD children typically have a higher level of
stress but being around a horse helps reduce stress, calms them and helps them
pay attention.
Second, horses are big, powerful, and, sometimes, scary. ADHD children are
often very distracted but having a 1,200 pound animal next to them gets their
attention. A friend recently said: “if you don’t know where your feet are, the
horse will find them!” It’s therefore important that the child pays attention to
the horse’s movements, and where it puts its hooves. The horse responds the
way you want him to when you are able to focus on the task at hand.
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One of the activities used to increase attention, focus and staying on task,
includes mindful grooming. It’s a simple exercise of brushing the horse, while
engaging all the senses…smell, sound, sight, touch and in some cases taste. The
child gets familiar with the feel of the brushes and other grooming tools and also
notices the feel and smell of the horse’s coat. This can become a very engaging
activity that helps build the relationship with another being.
Many parents are in awe because their very hyper kid manages to stand still and
focus for 15-20 minutes while brushing the horse, when he normally cannot sit
still for 3 minutes while eating his dinner.
In the one-on-one sessions with the ADHD child, we often do a “leading
exercise” where the objective is to notice how the horse reacts when the person
is paying attention while leading the horse around, or when they simply pull the
horse along while their mind is somewhere else. This activity enhances focus and
connection with another sentient being.
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Hanadi has real trouble focusing without getting distracted by everything
around her. She has difficulty staying connected in a conversation and she
cannot concentrate on minor tasks. She also has problems with eye contact
and on top of all this; she has cerebral palsy, causing her right side to be
mildly impaired. Hanadi is 9 years old and loves horses. Her mom brought
her to one of my experiential horse sessions to see if there was anything
that would help Hanadi improve her focus and attention.
I decided to try a simple ‘circle game’ where the objective is to get the
horse to walk around you on a line, in a circle, first one way and then the
other. It requires ‘eyes on the horse’ at all times and a focused effort to
encourage the horse to walk around without stopping.
First we drew a circle in the sand where Hanadi could stand in her “safe
space”; next she asked the horse gently to move, with her raised arm
holding the line and a little energy behind her other arm – almost ‘driving’
the horse forward. It really demanded her full attention and the horse
slowly began moving around her.
8
HANAD I ' S S TO RY
To make the horse stop walking around, I asked Hanadi to look at the
horse’s hind legs and tilt her head, so the connection between her eyes and
head and the horse was made. That usually makes the horse turn the hind
away from the human and stop.
Hanadi did a great job of keeping an eye on the horse all the way around
and looked steadily at the horse while tilting her head.
Just a simple exercise can begin to alter the child’s behavior and improve
concentration. And a horse asking for the attention is probably more fun
than a teacher asking.
Most importantly, when an ADHD child is asked to focus on a specific
activity with a horse, who is by nature non-judgmental and very forgiving,
that child develops ways of modifying his behavior without becoming
defensive, as he might be with a parent or teacher. The end result is
increased attention span and improved ability to stay on task for longer
periods.
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ADHD children very often struggle with words and age-appropriate
language,. They cannot get out the right sentence or idea. So they struggle
with:
✣ making judgments ✣ understanding information in science textbooks ✣ understanding cause-and-effect relationships in stories ✣ understanding why characters in stories are doing something ✣ talking about their ideas in more detail ✣ making clear explanations on request ✣ answering questions concisely using specific vocabulary
CHAPTER 2
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YOUR C H I L D I S T A L K I N G A L ANGUAG E YOU
N E E D TO UND E R S TAND !
Children also often miss non-verbal cues and are lacking in how to read
body-language. Research indicates that ADHD children have an overall
emotion-processing deficit. That means they do not control their own
emotions very well, nor are they capable of reading into others’ emotions.
When they're sad, they are given to fits of crying; when they're angry, they
are given to tantrums; and when they are excited, they're prone to act like
a tornado, whirling around and leaving big messes as they go. Regulating
and interpreting emotions is critical in social interaction with peers and for
many parents, who witness their child being left out of play-groups and
struggle to make friends because of emotional drama displays, this is a
painful and devastating element that is hard to manage.
However, these very same symptoms that parents may have come to dread
represent a remarkable gift: emotional sensitivity and intensity.
Before you panic and despair over your child’s emotional inadequacy or
emotional outbursts, consider this – your child may be prone to more
frequent emotional reactions because he is so sensitive to life and to his
connection with others. ADHD children must go through life with the
volume turned up much higher than it is for others. This quality of
emotional sensitivity may be seen as a fundamental unique feature of ADHD
and may help drive the other gifts of ADHD.
The gift of emotional sensitivity is also related to the gift of creativity and
often ADHD children are highly creative (and hyper-empathic) because
they see the world in artistic ways that other others barely notice. This is
evident in both my sons; my oldest is majoring in Industrial Design and is a
magnificent artist, and my youngest, is in Computer Science and creates
unique “pop-art” on the side. Both boys seem to have found a way to
manage their ADD/ADHD symptoms and have channeled the emotions into
creative outlets.
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The good news is that ADHD children do communicate emotions and
behavior through their own body language and by picking up on that, by
learning to understand the emotional body language, parents can better
understand what makes their child “tick”.
When working with horses in experiential sessions, thoughts, intent,
emotions and body language have to be congruent and aligned in order to
communicate effectively with the horses; and really – aligning your
thoughts, intent, emotions and body language is exactly what ADHD keeps
from happening.
Dr. Brenda Abbey (PhD Ed. Psych) has done extensive applied research and
found that Equine Assisted Learning helps children diagnosed with ADHD,
Autism Spectrum Disorder and other learning challenges. While working
with the horse, which is trained for this type of work, relationships are
developed that encourage empathy and awareness, of self and others.
Equine Facilitated Learning offers significant intra-personal understanding,
increased self-esteem and confidence in a shorter period of time due to
the experiential nature of forming a relationship with the horse.
The sessions with horses also promote language and communication
development for children who typically struggle with interpersonal skills.
The HeartMath Institute has been engaged in research on inter-
connectivity between all living beings and found that when two beings are
in coherence (in balance, harmony) their brainwaves and heartbeat rhythm
is completely in sync. This occurs not only between two people but also
between people and animals. It is due to the magnetic energy field that
exists around us. The chart below shows such heart coherence, between a
woman and her horse, when she is completely tuned in to his energy.
12
Daniel’s mother contacted me to see if I could help her ADHD diagnosed
son be calmer and control his anger outbursts when playing with other
children. Daniel, who is 8 years old, is very hyper, has frequent emotional
outbursts, cannot stand still for long, is impulsive, interrupts and speaks out
of turn, gets distracted an awful lot, but has a big heart when it comes to
animals. I suggested we do a session with Daniel where he had to groom
the horse, because this requires patience, intent and connection with the
horse at a level where a child with ADHD would be challenged.
As expected, Daniel fidgeted a lot in the beginning with the brushes, while
he chatted excessively. As a result, the horse, Lola, mirrored him and moved
her feet and herself about in nervous jerky display. Once Daniel settled on a
particular brush and started to move it across Lola’s side, both seemed to
settle into a rhythmic pattern. Lola stopped moving and Daniel went quiet
and just brushed and brushed for several minutes. It was as if their heart
beats and breaths were united into one.
One minute he was quiet – the next his attention was grabbed by the hoof
pick, an odd looking tool with a small brush on one side and a metal hook
on the other, used to clean the horse’s hooves. I explained what the tool
was for, as I could sense Daniel was very taken by the shape. I cautioned
him that the horse’s foot/leg might be too heavy for him to lift. Before I
could react, Daniel grabbed the pick, bent down underneath Lola’s stomach
and started brushing the top of her back hoof. I held my breath because I
was afraid that Lola might move her leg and accidentally step on or kick
Daniel. Safety is my utmost priority and Daniel was just too fast for me to
react!
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DAN I E L ' S S TO RY
I needed not worry because Lola froze, seemingly aware that an eager 8-
year old boy was fidgeting by her feet and she patiently stood there allowing
the connection to continue. When he was done Daniel smiled from ear to ear
and said: “She has a very clean foot now!” Indeed, Lola’s hoof was clean and
Daniel had in fact managed to keep his emotions very even through the
exercise. Daniel’s mom was speechless. Her son had never been so focused
and emotionally calm before.
She later called me to tell me when they got home Daniel noticed the
neighbor kid was riding his go-cart. Daniel immediately burst into anger and
shouted at the kid to get off. Very disturbed and feeling like he had been
violated in the most outrageous way, Daniel cried that it was not right for the
other boy to have taken his go-cart without asking. Daniel was right in fact,
but because of his ADHD he was unable to express the emotions in a way that
may have changed the situation. Daniel’s mom read into this and quietly said:
“What would Lola say about how you reacted and screamed at the boy?”
Daniel thought about this for a while and replied: “She wouldn’t like that at all.”
Daniel has since that session been able to regulate his emotional outbursts, and
Daniel’s mom and dad are more tuned into his non-verbal language.
Once parents learn to ‘tune in’ to their child’s body language and emotions and
understand that it’s alright to feel anger, sadness, frustration, fear and
happiness at a different level, they can start to guide their child in social
interaction for better connections with peers.
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It's important to remember that ADHD children are not lazy or less intelligent
than other children. They just have difficulty following instructions that
require organization, planning or execution, to the detriment of teachers and
parents.
Mental health professionals diagnose children with ADD/ADHD according to
"The American Psychiatric Association's Diagnostic and Statistical Manual,
Fifth edition (DSM-5)". From the hundreds of articles I have read over the
years, many doctors, researchers, psychologists and therapists agree that:
“ADHD is a chronic brain-based disorder that is a medical, developmental,
physiological, neurological, and behavioral and performance disorder that
generally disrupts the overall function of a person with ADHD, specifically the
executive functions. Executive functions are those functions which assist in;
memory recall, planning, organizing, activation, alertness, self-regulation/self-
control, prioritizing, flexibility, sequential thinking, setting goals, and
developing and following a plan of action. Thus, because of an impaired
executive function, children with ADHD often face academic challenges
regardless of how intelligent or capable they may be”.
Another researcher on the issue of school work: “The number one common
reason for school failure among ADHD students is not doing
homework. ADHD children display more frequent and severe homework
problems than their peers. Homework problems stem from the student’s
failure to write down homework assignments, failure to bring home
assignments, unwillingness to begin work at the designated time, lack of
persistence, lack of focus, failure to complete work, conflict with parents,
carelessness and failure to return assignments to the teacher. They have an
impaired sense of time that enables them to more easily procrastinate;
waiting until the last minute to start homework and projects".
CHAPTER 3
YOUR C H I L D COU L D B E T H E K E Y TO
EA R T H ' S S U RV I VA L
15
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You start to see the trend, right? Most of the professional folks feel that the
symptoms surface in the school setting, and many believe it is time to
rethink how we teach children who have a different way of taking in
information.
The resulting ideas over the years have been to design individual education
plans so the ADHD child still fits into the institution, albeit in a special unit, so
we continue to label the child with negative descriptions. Now we design a
special study group, with special resources, for a special kind of child, run by
special teachers, without actually thinking further about how the child might
be affected by being labeled as “special”.
What if we, instead of looking at all the negative words bombarding parents,
begin looking at what purpose the ADHD children serve in our family,
community, culture, world and universe? What if we, instead of trying to ‘fit’
them into an educational framework that will cause them to fail, let them
flourish in an environment where their characteristics and traits serve the
greater humankind? An environment, where they can unfold as adventurers,
innovators, thinkers, artists and change agents for a transformed and kind
ecosystem?
As a parent of two ADD/ADHD sons, I highly recommend reading “The
Edison Gene: ADHD and the Gift of the Hunter Child” by Thom Hartmann.
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Thom Hartmann is the creator of the "hunter versus farmer" theory of ADHD, which
holds that the characteristics of ADHD, such as impulsivity, distractibility, and risk-
taking are not signs of a disorder but components of highly adaptive skills that
served our hunting and gathering ancestors well. He examines the latest scientific
evidence confirming the existence of the ADHD gene and what triggered its
development 40,000 years ago. If the ADHD gene (Thom calls it the Edison gene
after Thomas Edison) served our ancestors so well in surviving and evolving,
perhaps our ADHD children today have much to offer the modern world.
Look at the traits of ‘Edison-gene’ individuals below. They are by nature:
✣ Enthusiastic ✣ Creative ✣ Disorganized ✣ Innovative ✣ Easily distracted (or, to put it differently, easily attracted to new stimuli) ✣ Capable of extraordinary hyper-focus ✣ Understanding of what it means to be an "outsider" ✣ Determined ✣ Eccentric ✣ Easily bored ✣ Impulsive ✣ Entrepreneurial ✣ Energetic
All of these qualities lead them to be natural explorers, inventors, and leaders.
Those carrying this gene, however, often find themselves in environments where
they're coerced, threatened, or shoehorned into a classroom or job that doesn't fit.
When Edison-gene children aren't recognized for their gifts but instead are told that
they're disordered, broken, or failures, a great emotional and spiritual wounding
occurs. This wounding can bring about all sorts of problems for children, for the
adults they grow into, and for our society.
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Maryam called me after seeing my announcement of a summer camp for kids who
are “stuck in Dubai” during the hot summer and Ramadan. She has three boys and
believes her oldest, Wael, may have ADHD. After a long intro meeting, where she
divulged all the issues the young Emirati family is facing (including possible autism
spectrum disorder of her middle boy), she decided to bring Wael to the stables for a
one-to-one session to see if the horse could indeed impact Wael’s lack of focus
and hyper behavior.
Wael is 6 years old and has not yet been professionally assessed or diagnosed. His
parents believe he has ADHD because he is over-active, inattentive and hyper and
"hard to control" - does this sound familiar?
When Wael ran down the aisle in the stable, frantically looking for a horse to pet, I
witnessed an active, adventurous, curious boy with such incredible lust for life.
Hyper? Yes! Active? Yes! Inattentive? NO! So, is being hyper-active enough for a
label and judgment of a 6-year old boy?
Wael asked all the typical - and very intelligent - questions. While he applied hoof oil
to Lola’s hooves, like he was painting a masterpiece of art, his chatter never stopped.
His behavior was 100 % in line with the above traits of an Edison-Gene child. Will
Wael go on to be an ambassador for the UAE on an international level? Or will he
explore the world with adventurous fervor? We do not yet know, but we do know
that this natural energy should in no way be subdued and perhaps his parents may
have to find another school system that fits his "learning-by-doing" eagerness.
Wae l ' s S t o r y
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Being told your child has ADHD can be devastating to parents. Not knowing
how to deal with it or what treatment and support options are available
magnifies the issue. ADHD affects not only the child but the whole family.
The demands of an ADHD child can be exhausting, mentally and physically.
Emotions such as guilt, anger, shame, anxiousness and vulnerability break
through the most resistant armor, as parents try to understand their child’s
behavior. The ADHD child will also need emotional and social support.
Because ADHD children can be "challenging" to both adults and other
children, their self-esteem may be affected and ADHD children may lack
positive experiences with accomplishment and friendships. Research shows
that 50-80% of ADHD teens have significant interpersonal difficulties,
impacting relationships with parents, teachers and friends.
Parents of ADHD children know that their kids have trouble regulating their
emotions. Emotions are not part of the criteria used to diagnose ADHD but
that doesn’t mean emotions aren’t a big part of the child’s behavior.
CHAPTER 4
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WHAT TO DO WH EN YOUR L I T T L E
G R E E N H U L K EM E R G E S
Research shows that ADHD children have less ability to identify and understand
emotions than non-ADHD children (Fonseca, 2008). Specifically, scientists have
found social deficits in ADHD children and adolescents. Indeed, these children appear
unable to modify their behavior in response to changes in environmental demands,
and unaware of subtle (but relevant) social cues. The interpersonal interactions
of ADHD children with their parents, siblings, peers and teachers are also frequently
characterized as negative and conflict filled. Consequently, ADHD children are often
rejected by their peers. Other peers may consider ADHD children to be aversive
playmates because of their tendency toward behavioral excess and impulsive
responding. It is frustrating for them that the ADHD children cannot stay on task or
stay focused during play.
When kids have trouble managing their emotions, it can show up in different ways.
Some might be unable to put the brakes on their feelings when they’re angry or
stressed about something. Others might struggle to get revved up to do something
when they’re feeling bored. ADHD children and adolescents do have an overall deficit
in emotion processing, and hyperactivity, impulsiveness and inattention seem to be
crucial factors contributing to difficulties in social interaction. In an experiment testing
how well ADHD children recognize other people’s emotions and regulate their own
emotions, it was found that boys appear to be less successful in masking their
emotions.
We may think children have less understanding of emotions than adults but that’s not
true. Empathy is a key feature of human intelligence and communication and children
can learn to develop this skill, even with ADHD.
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“Understanding Myself” by Dr. Mary Lamia, is a great book to help children (and
Parents) identify and understand their emotions and feelings.
Dr. Lamia is a clinical psychologist who wrote this book for children 8 years
and up (parents can read the book to younger children), and it includes
descriptions of emotions, explanations for why you feel them, and suggestions
to help kids observe their own emotional behaviors — and the behaviors of
their friends.
It’s a lively, interactive book. There are questionnaires, quotes from children
talking about their own emotions, and sections that describe findings from
emotion research. It’s a fun and useful book that will really help your children
understand their emotions — and it will open up the discussion so that
emotional awareness can become a normal part of your family’s conversations.
Children are often conditioned to avoid their emotions by parents who were
themselves conditioned to avoid emotions (“big boys don’t cry”, “stop being so
emotional”, “girls shouldn’t show anger or throw tantrums”, “control yourself”….)
– in fact, even advice from well-known ADHD support and psychology
websites, highlight that “when ADHD kids practice controlling their emotions
and impulsive outbursts, they will be healthier and happier at school and at
home”! Control or avoidance helps nobody. In my experience with horses and
as a licensed trainer in Dynamic Emotional Integration®, and as a mom of two
ADD/ADHD boys, you are better off letting your child experience the emotions
and learn how to up-and-down regulate them, instead of trying to avoid and
control them.
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Everyone needs their emotions (all 17 of them). All of our emotions bring us
messages and skills to help understand our self and the world around us.
> All of our emotions are necessary.
> Each emotion has a specific message for us and a specific job to do.
> Each emotion brings us intelligence to help guide our actions.
> Emotions are a part of our brain and our body.
> Emotions are a vital part of our intelligence and social skills.
> When we can learn how to work with our emotions, we will have
access to more and better choices, better self-awareness, better
understanding of others, and more skills.
Babies learn emotional expressions (such as fear, happiness, anger sadness)
during their first 12 months, mostly through their environment and by
mirroring parents' expressions. How much emotional nuance (or empathic
accuracy) they develop will affect their social behavior. As children grow
older, they can distinguish more advanced emotion concepts such as awe,
gratitude, and compassion. They learn to regulate their behavior by using
these emotion concepts. Schoolchildren who learn more emotion concepts
have improved social behavior and academic performance, as research by the
Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence shows. If you incorporate such
concepts into your daily life, your brain will learn to apply them automatically.
Emotion concepts are tools for living. The bigger your tool kit, the more
flexibly your brain can anticipate and prescribe actions, and the better you can
cope with life. (Lisa Feldman Barret, 2016).
22
Horses are prey animals and therefore mainly look to survive the day. They
are also herd animals who in the wild look for a leader to keep them
protected and safe. They are sensitive to non-verbal communication (body
language and intent), and mirror the people (or other animals) around them.
If an ADHD child acts aggressively or with anger, the horse will startle and
retreat from perceived danger. This is a teachable moment, in which children
can see how their behavior affects others. Similarly, children who are very
shy or timid will not influence the horse. They can be taught to use their
voices and bodies to greater effect, to stand up for themselves. These are
important lessons in non-verbal communication that are great for children.
Maya’s mom contacted me to see if the horses and I could help Maya learn
more about her emotions and how to regulate them. She is 9 years old and
was adopted from China when she was around 6 months old. Her family has
noticed that she doesn’t react empathic to many situations that would
normally elicit some kind of emotional response. For example, if her
younger brother is hurt, Maya will tell him to just get over it. Or if her mom
is sad or crying, Maya will just look at her with a non-comprehensive
expression. Too many times Maya will over-react to minor things and will
throw anger tantrums and scream for hours until she gets her way, or the
situation is rectified. She is often anxious and stressed. Her relationships
with other friends suffer and she is not happy at her school. In contrast, she
appears to react very positively to animals and loves engaging with her
two small cats.
Several visits to therapists have provided insight into Maya's early
childhood, before she was adopted, and her lack of emotions and emotional
regulation could be a result of not receiving closeness or being coddled in
her first few months as an infant.
MAYA ' S S TO RY
23
Scientists have found that as a group, neglected or abandoned children tend to have
abnormal circuitry in areas of the brain involved in parental bonding, compassion and
affection. According to Charles Nelson, professor of pediatrics at Harvard Medical
School and Boston Children’s Hospital, more than a decade of research on children
raised in institutions shows that "neglect is awful for the brain. Without someone who
is a reliable source of attention, affection and stimulation, he says, the wiring of the
brain goes awry." The result can be long-term mental and emotional problems.
It is very likely that Maya didn’t receive adequate affection or emotional stimuli the
first 6 months and is now struggling with compassion, love and affection from her
adoptive family.
Dr. Nim Tottenham, PhD, of the Developmental Affective Neuroscience Laboratory at
the University of California, Los Angeles found in one study of 51 Chinese adopted
infants that those reared in orphanages exhibit physical growth and behavioral delays.
Difficulties in social and emotional development can lead to poor social attachments,
emotional dysregulation, heightened anxiety, and negativity bias.
As a licensed trainer in Dynamic Emotional Integration® from Karla McLaren the work
I do around emotions, with horses as co-facilitators, results in a greater self-
awareness and insight into how regulating your emotions can help function better in
social situations.
Maya has had two sessions with me and the horses. The main focus has been on how
she can protect her personal space and set proper boundaries so others respect her
feelings. Once she feels respected she can learn to respect others. The work with the
horse was primarily ‘observing space’ and working with ‘energy and intent’. While we
worked with the horse moving around Maya's personal space, we talked about how
anger, sadness, anxiety, fear and other emotions may affect horses. It was a form of
role play and as Maya changed between her moods and emotions, we observed the
horse’s reactions.
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It was clear that there was less connection between the horse and Maya when
she displayed her emotions silently, but as soon as she acknowledged her
feelings, the horse came close for long periods. Horses feel safe and at ease
when humans are in alignment with their feelings, intent and body language.
The horse can ‘read’ the emotions through how congruent the human is.
With a few more sessions Maya will be able to communicate her intent more
clearly. In parallel we work with each of the emotions by using special
special Emotions Cards, each of which has specific information about how to
regulate when the specific emotion arises.
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I hope you have enjoyed this eBook. If you want to knowmore about your child's special wiring and how to manage thesymptoms of ADHD, please feel free to contact me anytime
+971 (0) 55 663 7302 [email protected]
As a certified Equine Assisted Coaching Practitioner and LifeCoach, I offer complimentary discovery sessions and regularlyhold workshops for children and adults, with the horses. Visitmy website www.caballusconsulting.com for more information.
With Ease and Horsepower
Pia
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Disclaimer:
You must not rely on the information on our website or in this eBook as analternative to medical advice from your doctor, psychiatrist or other
professional healthcare provider.
The exercises described in this book are not designed to diagnose or treatADHD, merely to illustrate how symptoms can be managed. They are not analternative to medication; if you believe your child needs medication it is
your choice to speak to a psychiatrist or family doctor.
The exercises and activities described in this eBook have been done with aprofessionally trained and certified coach; do not attempt to do this alonewith your child as horses can be dangerous and unpredictable animals.
Pia Ault cannot be held responsible or liable for any exercises or activitiesentered into without proper supervision by a horse expert and interpreting
equine facilitated coach practitioner.